CAN SOMEONE EXPLAIN THIS —

i have been friends with this guy for just over two years now. From day one I knew he liked me, he made it clear with all the meaningful topics he would talk about and through his sweet/flirty messages. I also felt the same but found it hard to express it in the same way that he did. I was almost closed off to a fault. This is just in my nature however. Eventually a situation arose where I was forced to express everything on my mind and told him how i felt and how he was the only one etc.. etc.. This situation was someone i know telling him lies about things i had said about him.. he ended up calling me fake and told me to leave him be. He did not speak to me for about six months and i stopped trying to speak to him and explain that i'm not fake. but I did tell him the truth about how i feel and that he has to know that i keep everything inside.

A couple of weeks ago i decided to call him up and see if he responds. This was six months after our disagreement. He actually decided to speak to me this time round and did not even mention a single bit of what had happened.. and i decided not to aswell. This conversation was really good and he spoke to me about everything..and asked me about every aspect of my life, marriage was also mentioned and he was completely interested in hearing everything i had to say, at the end he told me to keep in contact with him.

The second conversation we had recently was when he decided to call me up. The conversation was very different to the last and its as if i was talking to a different person. He didn't ask too much about me, instead he spent almost an hour talking about different girls, at least six different girls. At first i thought it was just a normal part of conversation but then when he kept going on about how this girl wanted to meet up with me and this girl was soooo pretty and i was checking her out and this other girl said this to me.. i thought he was talking too much about it. I however kept my cool and spoke to him very naturally he would not have even realised that in my head i was wondering what the hell was going on.lol.

Only yesterday he dropped a bombshell. He said he was feeling very depressed and he couldnt sleep...and he told me not to ask him too many questions but it was to do with a SPECIAL person.. a girl who he says he liked and ticked all his boxes but it was not going to work out.

I kept trying to find out more but he kept sayin don't ask me anymore... there is no point talking about it if its not going to work out...

but never once in two and a half years has he even mentioned another girll... and now after our big disagreemet..he starts talking about this girl and that girll...

plus my other friend told me that only a months or so before he told her he has not time for girls...but he does want to find one...because he wants to get married etc....so its wierd how the special someone was not around then...

so why would he b talking about soo many different girls only two weeks before...and then suddenly tell me he has a special someone...it don't add up...

Yeah, I can explain it ..... you are so desperate to be loved and wanted that you would do anything have it .... even to your own detriment.

1. Considering how you guys left off when you fell out, did you honestly expect him to remain faithful/loyal/celebate the whole time? I hope not. Life must go on

2. He may be trying to make you jealous OR test your reaction. He figures that if you respond with jealousy or disappointment that it must signal that you're still into him. If that's the case, he has a pretty weird & backwards way of going about trying to figure out if you still like him, but hey some men go for the kill & have the strangest ways of getting their answer.

3. Or he probably put you in the "friend" category, thus he no longer has to hide his extra relations with other women b/c he's no longer chasing you, therefore he no longer has to keep that area of his life silent or hide it from you, like he probably would've had you 2 still been dating. He's probably discussing "women" with you like he would any of his other friends.

4. When he told a friend that he "doesn't have time for girls" that doesn't mean that he hasn't been sleeping with them or having semi-relations with them. He was probably trying to say that he doesn't have time for a serious relationship with any of them. You might've mistaken his words to mean that he literally wasn't seeing, talking to or entertaining any women period. And if that's the case, idk why you'd even believe that.

5. Take his word for it. If he swears he's got a million girls around him right now, believe him. And if he's lying, use that as motivation to stay far away from him! If he's making all of this up, it shows that he's a liar & manipulator & that he'll go to irrational lengths to get what he wants/get certain responses from others.

Posted by krysrenee7
1. Considering how you guys left off when you fell out, did you honestly expect him to remain faithful/loyal/celebate the whole time? I hope not. Life must go on

2. He may be trying to make you jealous OR test your reaction. He figures that if you respond with jealousy or disappointment that it must signal that you're still into him. If that's the case, he has a pretty weird & backwards way of going about trying to figure out if you still like him, but hey some men go for the kill & have the strangest ways of getting their answer.

3. Or he probably put you in the "friend" category, thus he no longer has to hide his extra relations with other women b/c he's no longer chasing you, therefore he no longer has to keep that area of his life silent or hide it from you, like he probably would've had you 2 still been dating. He's probably discussing "women" with you like he would any of his other friends.

4. When he told a friend that he "doesn't have time for girls" that doesn't mean that he hasn't been sleeping with them or having semi-relations with them. He was probably trying to say that he doesn't have time for a serious relationship with any of them. You might've mistaken his words to mean that he literally wasn't seeing, talking to or entertaining any women period. And if that's the case, idk why you'd even believe that.

5. Take his word for it. If he swears he's got a million girls around him right now, believe him. And if he's lying, use that as motivation to stay far away from him! If he's making all of this up, it shows that he's a liar & manipulator & that he'll go to irrational lengths to get what he wants/get certain responses from others.

1. course i did not expect him not to...however the way he was acting depressed on the phone i find it hard to believe it is over someone he met after me and him stopped talking...almost fell in love..because the way he was reacting on the phone it felt like that...and then broke it off...and is now deeply hung up... i just do not tthink this could happen in the matter of months... i could always be wrong...but the type of person he is... he takes this stuff very seriously...and he is quite slow about progressing things with girls...even his friend told me that he hardly meets up with girls too quickly...

2. i maybe at fault here because it took me two years to finally confess...that i

like him...i used to pretend he was just my friend... i was friendly but not in the way you would act when you are completely in to someone... he used to try and find out from my friends and even his friend if i talk about him or mention him.... i only had the guts to tell him once me and him were falling out...so end of last year.. i know this is really bad but i was trying ot change now... but him talking about so many other girls is making it hard for me to open up..because now i am in doubt if he still likes me or not..and i dont want to be a fool

3. i dont think its that because..... he did mention all these girls...and then i think i simply asked him questions about them later...and he responded by saying im not interested in any of them...and they flirt with me...but i dont flirt back etc... and im thinking well its odd how u spoke of them differently only a week before...
but i feel like he just tried to get my reactions...my reactions were practically non existant and then he couldnt keep up the pretence that he liked any of them....
or forgot that i might be keeping note of all of his words...

4. most of the time i'v known him...he has been working away....its always about work work work work..and his career...and he literally used to always say he has no time for anything not even to sleep..i very much doubt he has time for a full blown relationshipp..

5. i dont doubt he has got girls around him...
and you are right i have started to keep my distance but mostly because... i cannot talk to him and pretend everything is alright since he mentioned that special someone...so i hope he takes my silence for an actual reaction this time... i told him i would call him back but i havnt...since the beginnning of the week...
maybe it will give him time to real

realise that what he has been saying recently does effect me.