Do YOU believe in unconditional love?

This topic was created in the Relationships forum by iceredrobot on Thursday, January 12, 2012 and has 20 replies.
Do you think you're capable of it?
Definition: affection with no limits or conditions; complete love.

Family doesn't count, we HAVE to love themTongue I have it with a friend, it's...lovelysmile But that's it!!! I worry for the day I'll love a man unconditionally because I know I'm capable. x___x
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Posted by M
Yes.
Now I have to ask about the fine print. Would you consider "as long as they are themselves" a condition? What about not loving/condoning everything they do but loving them as a person?


No conditions. Hence UnconditionalTongue
Well yeah, it's like family. They could kill everyone in the world but you'd still love their crazy ass. It doesn't mean condoning their actions, or never going against them, or not turning them into the police - doesn't even have to mean staying with them. Just means loving them come what may.
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Nope don't believe in unconditional love unless it's blood. i.e.: children, siblings, parents, grandparents.
Love dies or ends or changes and becomes friendship or comfort and then come the conditions. Without conditions, you will get walked over. There will always be conditions!
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Posted by M
So it looks like it's impossible since they had to do *something* to garner the love in the first place.


I dunno, it would be very pretentious of me to say you didn't love them unconditionally. I think only a sage can answer this one Tongue
But you bring up a good point, some people change dramatically over 5/10+ yrs. But I guess if you love someone for their soul, it wont matter if their personality/looks/mind changes. I'm being idealistic of course.
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yes I do believe it exists. Otherwise what is the point of life?
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Only from the poor.
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I believe in unconditional love-if you and your partner change the relationship should change with you. Or if the relationship changes you should change for the relationship. If you do not you are not evolving properly according to your path and the relationship should be termitated, free of guilt but in light, peace and love.
If you cannot then I believe it is with "conditions" and is not the love you are really looking for anyway. Make sense?
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Yes.
Ironically, the time I was learning and practising it on some people in my life, they were the ones to test me the most, almost a direct opposition force that I was oblivious to. Did I lose my faith? No..
I think Love is a Faith, that's what it is. To lose it is to embrace the material and being practical in all aspects of life. Then, love / faith would just be another hormonic trigger or chemical reaction in random synapses. Yet it is more than that ad infinitum.
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I think for couplings where unconditional love is to be practised, it must go both ways without exception, and when one party loses the faith, the other must reinforce it. Anyway this is a natural process and sometimes unconditional love cannot be helped.. I don't believe that an ending to what once was is considered unconditional.
Aspects to note: Sun/Venus between charts.
Like an astrological aspect, it is unfazed by transits or time, it just is.
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Posted by MzSagittarius
Unconditional love is totally real and totally possible.
It all depends on your definition of love.
For instance, if you were to, God forbid, kill one of my family members, I'd strongly despise you, but I'd still love you.
Loving someone and liking someone are two completely different things.

After all, unconditional love has NO conditions.




I agree with this.
I'm capable of loving unconditionally, but that has nothing to do with liking that person imo. Personally, if I don't like you I can completely remove myself from your presence, possibly forever, but that has nothing to do, imo, with love, which will always be there.
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Love is conditional! If you say you're just dyying for some unconditional loooove, chew on it before you nag your SO about something. Before you correct them or run any negative thoughts in your head about them. WHY? Because if you do...there's your answer smile
IMO!
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Posted by Awakened
Love is conditional! If you say you're just dyying for some unconditional loooove, chew on it before you nag your SO about something. Before you correct them or run any negative thoughts in your head about them. WHY? Because if you do...there's your answer smile
IMO!


+1
Sorry to those who believe in it....but I feel I must be realistic.
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I will admit though that I have a high tolerance for other people's bad behavior but at the end of the day I respect myself too much to let these people walk all over me and keep using me. I used to think I loved one of my friends since childhood "unconditionally" but there came a point where I just could not deal with her nonsense anymore and I had to walk away and be free.
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I believe unconditional love is complete acceptance of another. It's not about losing self respect or giving up yourself. It's choosing to love this person and everything about them without judgement. I do believe that is possible.
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Nope. smile I don't think I'm capable of it. Sorry. smile *shrugs innocently*
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Yes
I've witnessed this while passing through harsh times .The thought that someone out there views you from an entirely different perspective ,brings a smile on your face and is a strong motivational factor
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Posted by aquaj
So herein lies the problem; the very definition of what it means to love unconditonally means different things to different people. It is, in itself, subjective; therefore, it cannot exist.

Define blue.
Can you do it?
Is it Royal Blue, Powder Blue, Navy Blue?
Blue is a spectrum dominated by energy of a certain wavelength
Variances in a persons eyes can affect how they see blue.
Colorblindness could eliminate that ability all together.
That does not mean blue doesn't exist.

A subjective value does not mean it is valueless.



I am not a church goer but I think they have the best difinition of love.
1 Corinthians 13:4-13
4: Love is patient, love is kind. it does not envy, it does not boast, it is not proud.
5: It is not rude, it is not self-seeking, it is not easily angered, it keeps no record of wrongs.
6: Love does not delight in evil, but rejoices with the truth.
7: It always protects, always trusts, always hopes, always preserves.
8: Love never fails. But where there are prophecies, they will cease; where there are tongues they will be stilled; where there is knowledge, it will pass away.
9: For we know in part and we prophesy in part,
10: but when perfection comes, the imperfect disappears.
11: When I was a child, I talked like a child, I thought like a child, I reasoned like a child. When I became a man, I put childish ways behind me.
12: For now we see but a poor reflection as in a mirror; then we shall see face to face. Now I know in part; then I shall know fully, even as I am fully known.
13: And now these three remain: faith, hope and love. But the greatest of these is love.

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^ +1/0
Air isnt visible .Does it mean ,air doesnt exist?
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Posted by aquaj
If a couple were to have a 30-year relationship which was endearing and affectionate, and it ended, then according to your definition of love, it would be a lie to say that they were ever in love at all - they were mistaken. It would have been a 30 year INFATUATION.


A relationship ending does not mean that the love is dead, simply that it wasn't enough to sustain the relationship. I never said 'love is all you need'. I bet that after spending 30 years with someone in a relationship as endearing and affectionate as you said, those two people would still care deeply for each other even after they parted ways. The love didn't fail, the relationship did.

Posted by aquaj
The OTHER problem with your definition is that it does not allow for the possibility that love can be transformed from one form to another (for instance, passionate to companionate love). The definition of love you've provided does not distinguish between types of love. It does not really define love at all, except to say that it's a nice state of beingsmile
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I know that love can evolve and change. I believe that love is a verb; it is an action word. More than that, I don??t think love is simply a word or feeling; on some level, I believe love is alive. The actions that you take for/with love determine whether it lives or dies. People often talk about a long relationship that suddenly ends; there is nothing sudden about it. That relationship died a slow painful death riddled with neglect and starvation. Not just romantic relationships either, but any of them. No matter what form your love takes, neglect it and it will die, nurture it and it will grow. In that respect, I believe that ???falling out of love?? is a choice.
Why would your couple decide that after 30 great years they had enough? They get married at 20, have 30 loving affectionate years and then, at 50 years old, just say, ???fuck it??? Somewhere along the way they stopped trying and/or caring.
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Oh, I am also not saying all love is unconditional. I think that unconditional love takes a long time to grow to that level. I??d also like to point out that loving someone doesn??t mean I have to stay around them or even talk to them anymore. I read several people talking about how unconditional love would require you to abandon self respect. That is only if you allow it. Loving someone doesn??t mean I have to condone or even accept their actions. This line of thinking completely ignores the idea of consequences. If my son gets punished, it doesn??t mean I love him less because he is facing a consequence. That is part of life.
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