Erasing the Color Lines

Ok so I have dated mostly Black men, and honestly, the brothers are about to drive me crazy! Lmao. I know men are men and dogs exists in every ethnic group. However, I have been thinking about not being so closed minded when it comes to who I date. I honestly have always imagined myself marrying a Black man. Nothing against men from other races, I just never thought about it. Well, now I am! Lol. Does anyone have any experience with interracial dating?

I've never dated a white guy but from what I hear we're assholes too...

😕

My whole life basically is one interracial hodgepodge. I've dated white, black, hispanic, and I've had feelings for asians and so on. I've mostly dated white men though.

Honestly, white men or any other type are no different from black men. Men are men. You just have to find one that suits you emotionally, mentally, physically, ect. If you have a preference, there is nothing wrong with that. Try not to think about the guy's ethnicity and focus more on how he makes you feel.

You're right. Men are men. There's cheaters, liars, dogs, players, deceivers, bums, etc. in EVERY race. If black men were the only ones who acted like fools, they'd be the only race with a divorce rate. BUT they're NOT; women of ALL races have problems with men of ALL races, so there's really no getting around it.

You just have to pick more wisely. Who you attract (especially if you're attracting the SAME types of men alot) says alot about you. You absolutely DO have something to do with who/what you're attracting whether you realize it or not.

Interacial dating is a good idea. Don't ever limit yourself. Just like there's Aholes in every race, there's GREAT guys in every race too, so from that perspective, you might actually be missing out if you just choose to put all your eggs into only 1 basket.

I don't hate on those who date outside of their race as long as they're doing so b/c they want to be open-minded, vs. only doing so b/c they hate or have major problems with their own race. As with anything involving love, the best attitude is in being open-minded & interracial dating & open-minded mean the SAME thing to me.

i've dated them all but there IS a difference no matter how "PC" folks want to be on here. the reality is, there are cultural differences and that extends to "pair bonding" as well. sure, there are assholes in every race but i can tell you one thing, in dating black men, it was as if the relationship was an experiment..."we'll see where this goes." it was sort of a perpetual dating stance. no matter what i wanted in terms of marriage, our fate as a couple felt as if it had little to do with me. i could be a saint trapped in a whore's body and it wouldnt make a damn difference. if he wasn't ready, i'd be doomed to years of simply dating...however committed, until he got around to it.

of course i'm generalizing but yeah...

in dating outside of my race, i felt/feel as if we both approached it with the intent of longevity. there was a desire to truly go the distance. even if it failed, the intent was established at the start and more often than not, that intent felt/was genuine. in these relationships, i felt as if i my weight as a woman/partner was being measured by what i meant to the individual whereas with those of my own race, as i said, doesn't matter what your measure is, if he isn't ready, he simply aint.



my Catfish isn't black and there has been very little that has been casual about our coming together. the ease at which we've come together never ceases to amaze me. when he tells me of what he wants for the future, i don't sense game, i dont feel my hurt flutter with hope, i simply recognize the reality of his desires. if i fit the bill, great. if i don't, no hard feelings as there's someone out there for both of us.

don't fall into the trap of resigning yourself to dating exclusively within your race. life's too short and in the end, what does his color matter when you're being held in the darkness? too many black women would rather be alone than step outside of their comfort zone. in the end, i'd rather be happy...period and any man who can give me that has the ability to win my heart...black, white or in-between.

Lmao @ LibaSid!

Candeh - You are right! Like I said, there are liars, cheaters, ect, in every ethnic group. So, I know I will not be necessarily dodging a bullet in regards to that. I have never really played with the idea SERIOUSLY, so now that I am thinking about it, I am thinking about the benefits as far as it increasing the odds of me meeting the right person. Obviously, if I continue to ONLY date Black men, I am reducing the chances of me meeting a man significantly opposed to if I begin to branch out a tad. Lol.

krysrenee7 — You are absolutely right about changing the type of men who I am attracted to and the type of men I attract. When I was younger I really didn't know what the hell I was doing, and went for the most attractive man. Lol. Now, that I have gotten older my tastes have changed quite a bit. I find that conversation turns me on more than anything. However, I still find myself attracted to alpha males, which may or may not be a good thing. Ha!

Yes, I cannot stand when people throw others under the bus to justify who they want to date. I have met several Black men who say TERIBLE things about Black women to justify who they date, when all they have to say is, —I am with the woman I want to be with.?? PERIOD. There is no need to belittle a group of people in order to justify a person??s actions. That is a whole other topic altogether and I can go on for days!!! Lol.

Caligula — I do agree that although men are men, there are definite cultural differences which can have a very large impact on the way a man functions in a relationship. —Experiment" is a perfect way to put it! I have felt like this as well. Again, I do realize that this is possible to feel this way with any man??_but I do think there are some cultural and societal influences which contribute to this being a tendency with some Black men.

OK, so here is a question for those (male and female) who have dated outside of their race, did you find that any cultural differences caused issues in your relationship or the courting process? Also, did you experience any level of intimidation when approaching the person that you would not typically have felt when approaching someone in your same race?

I have also dated outside my race, I think all men are typically the same and as you all have said there will be dogs in all races. I did however have one date with an asian guy and he normally dated white girls but he found me exotic I guess and interesting and so did I him so we went out and his conversation was actually cool but I don't know if I took him or our date seriously I just thought of it as something to do. When dating a different races their are not too many cultural differences but I did notice I once had a date with a white guy and he cooked me dinner and I know this could be any men but his food was really bland. So I think and it depends on how they were raised it could be a differences in the types of food you may like or family values you find acceptable.

@Impress me, I like your new pic: very cute

Lol @ ScorpDiva!! LMAO @ "bland". That is too funny.

Another issue for me is that I live in Los Angels. Although there is a lot of diversity, the city is VERY segregated and it APPEARS as though only women and Black men (go figure) are likely to date outside of their race. Men form other ethnic groups APPEAR to be pretty much settled into dating women who share their race. Again, it APPEARS this way and I know there HAVE to be men out here who are willing to date women outside their race. This statement is based on observation. But LA IS very segregated.

@Natural, yeah some places are very segregated like that! When you go out make sure you go to places that are mixed and believe me white men espically love some black women they think we are very sexy and I know others like hispanic think so too I am not to sure about asians. Also maybe try some dating sites and flirt or make conversation with some cute guys of a different race if you can't find them while you go out and about locally, I know you might not like dating sites, I am like that cause I like to see the person (in person) but this is a good way to meet others who live close by that you would have never meet otherwise and espically of another race.

I haven't dated outside my race (white). Nothing against it, it just didn't happen that way. My sister was engaged to an Indian man. They really gave the relationship everything they had, but in the end the cultural differences were just so overwhelming that they split up. He ended up marrying and Indian woman.

Posted by ImpressMe

Posted by scorpdiva
I have also dated outside my race, I think all men are typically the same and as you all have said there will be dogs in all races. I did however have one date with an asian guy and he normally dated white girls but he found me exotic I guess and interesting and so did I him so we went out and his conversation was actually cool but I don't know if I took him or our date seriously I just thought of it as something to do. When dating a different races their are not too many cultural differences but I did notice I once had a date with a white guy and he cooked me dinner and I know this could be any men but his food was really bland. So I think and it depends on how they were raised it could be a differences in the types of food you may like or family values you find acceptable.

LMAO! That is funny, but that was nice of him to cook for you. My white friends cook bland food but I still eat it, lol.

click to expand

IKR, see I love my soul food I got to have flavor but I will still eat bland food and just add a pepper.

Thanks for your input! @ pyewacket and Whimsey 🙂

LMAO @ Scorp and Impress!!! that is TOO funny! I LOVE seasoning too!

Posted by natural25
OK, so here is a question for those (male and female) who have dated outside of their race, did you find that any cultural differences caused issues in your relationship or the courting process? Also, did you experience any level of intimidation when approaching the person that you would not typically have felt when approaching someone in your same race?

I actually got more shit for dating white men from other black people than from white people. And honestly, I never had anything less in common with white men. Compared to some of the guys who went to my high school who were black, I had less in common with them (but those were more social differences than pure cultural ones. Culturally, I was probably different from black and white men). However, I've found that some men are intimidated to approach me when they are of a different race. And those cultural and social differences, and stereotypes come into play here. Honestly, I'm not directly approached by many men, but here in America, men in general just don't seem to approach women too often and directly. I really try to not even point anything out about race if I'm dealing with someone who is not my race unless we're joking around (and we share the same humor, I mean, I love race jokes). I try to keep things completely equal, and if anything is going to separate us, it's the fact that I'm a woman and he's a man.

I would say that it's always possible that you will run into roadblocks that are due to cultural and racial differences, but it's up to you to decide if you can deal with them if the other person is willing. Not everyone is going to like you, but you are doing this for yourself and not for others. Some people may not like that I date white men, but who are they to tell me who I can and cannot date/love?

Lol @ Ever.

I honestly did not realize that there are plenty of men out there who are open to dating outside of their race. I guess I just never gave it much thought.... I am sure as a result, I have given off a somewhat unapporachable vibe. I will have to work on that! Lol.

I am on a cleanse, so I will have to work on my attitude in general right now. GRRR!!!! Lol.

Candeh - That is what I thought, that maybe, non-Black men would feel intimidated or put off by approaching me....

Aww thanks Ever!!! 😉

Riiighhhttt! BRAZE UP!!! Lmao.

black women do NOT want to date interracially. the stats prove it. and frankly, if you ask enough black women, if you know any, you'll find a trend of resounding "no's."

white men, imo, are intimidated by black and latin women to a lesser degree. where the sexual stereotypes heaped upon black men during/post slavery have actually worked in their favor...

- black men have bigger dicks
- black men are more manly
- black men are strong and virile...

this isn't the case for black women. the "jezebel/aunt jemima" stereotypes have transformed into "baby mama/big mama." aint shit sexy bout either.

the odd thing is, by creating stereotypes about both genders, white men elevated white women to the point that they are coveted by some non-white men, they devalued black women in particular and this has persisted, they devalued but in sexually elevated black men and subsequently devalued themselves.

white men, by virtue of their own doing, are regarded as weaker, less passionate, less virile and frankly, that they have smaller dicks. if stereotypes flow one way, they have to flow the other.

my point is, i know black women who could walk into a sea of single men of all races and still zero in on the black dudes. a white guy could lay roses at their feet and they'd still be looking at the black dude in the corner who has a queue of women poised in front of him.

overall though, outside of countries heavily impacted by slavery, the notion that this requires so much discussion is ridiculous. the US is fucked up in many regards with respect to race/perceptions of race and frankly, i can't wait until i begin counting the days of my departure.

Posted by natural25
did you find that any cultural differences caused issues in your relationship or the courting process? Also, did you experience any level of intimidation when approaching the person that you would not typically have felt when approaching someone in your same race?

It's no secret that society still engages in stereotypes, racism and/or making cultural differences a "bad thing." Of course interracial relationships can be more challenging to get into AND remain in, but not so much b/c the relationship itself is so difficult. No, it's moreso society, biased family members & an uncomfortability with dating someone "different" than you to begin with that makes these relationships seems so challenging & intimidating.

The folks who seems to have no shame in their game when it comes to not discriminating against which race they'll date, tend to have just as fulfilling relationships when they're dating outside of their race the SAME way 2 people of the same race have successful relationships. It's all about each person's comfortability with stepping outside of the box & being open-minded. If there's barely any comfortability there, of course society & biased family members can be intimidating & almost ruin a potentiall good thing.

There's nothing wrong with realizing that you may have to approach 1 man differently than you would another man. Yes all men are basically the same, BUT there IS a difference b/w men of all races. And those differences stem from cultural & social differences whereas society only divides the line sometimes by economical differences. It's NO secret that in certain cultures, the social dynamic is a tad different.

Any time you change the "breed" of guy you've started to become attracted to, it's almost like we become littly shy kids, who don't know what to say or how to act...almost as if all the "swag" or "charm" we have goes out the window b/c we're so nervous that what worked for 1 race won't work for another. Half of that fear is all in our heads.

It's simple...If you're attractive, if you're confident, if you're witty & if your approach is awesome, ANY man will talk to you AND find you attractive. Those are the things that ALL men of ALL races are attracted to

It's simple...If you're attractive, if you're confident, if you're witty & if your approach is awesome, ANY man will talk to you AND find you attractive. Those are the things that ALL men of ALL races are attracted to

The same works vice versa. If you're crazy as hell, possessive, extremely cling, unattractive, have low-self esteem & have no swag or charm about yourself, MOST men of ALL races will be turned off or not want to date you.

There are just some things that ALL men are.

Caligua - I think that is a bit of a generalization. I do not think Black woman by and large do not want to date outside of their race. In fact, my friends and I were just having a conversation about it the other day, which prompted this post. All of them are ready and willing to date outsde their race and most of them have done so at one point or the other.

Krys - I agree with you. I suppose anything new is a bit intimidating or possess some reservation. However, I do realize the need to start changing things up a bit. Ha ha ha.

Posted by natural25
Caligua - I think that is a bit of a generalization. I do not think Black woman by and large do not want to date outside of their race. In fact, my friends and I were just having a conversation about it the other day, which prompted this post. All of them are ready and willing to date outsde their race and most of them have done so at one point or the other.

the stats don't bear this in mind. reality is reality, denying it because it makes you feel better is on you.

hell, apparently you're just considering it and you're nearly 30. wth did you need to "discuss it" with your friends if everybody's doing it?

Posted by LoveBucket
the overall reason for this is we are not physically attracted to the caucasian man and, we are not sexually attracted to a white penis where you can see his coloured veins.

WUT!?

i'd fuck the pink off matthew mcconaughey's dick!

i don't think it's a matter of not finding white men attractive. i think it's all in our ingrained cultural perception of what it means to be a man. that perception is based far more in stereotypes than in reality. ie, of ALL races, which male racial group is likely to catch the short end of the stick?

asian males

why? because of the perception that they have small wees. statistically this is true but what does this convey in regard to our perception of what a "man" is supposed to represent physically?

now take years of racist indoctrination and what you end up with is a skewed perception not only of self, but in regard to others as well. white women who exclusively date black men, guaranteed they will say one of the reasons they foolishly and racistly do so is because black men are "more manly." the bitch really wants a mandingo and her fucked up mentality and lack of cultural awareness can't identify it as such.

a black woman who has to have a debate within herself over whether or not she could date a white man, trust, the bitch is harboring a slave mentality because the reality is, you could ask the same woman if she would date a latino and there wouldn't be nearly as much hesitation.

Caligula made some good points, we all have heard that asian man have small penis but small to me could be different to another women so it is in our perception of what a "man" is suppose to have physically. I personally find white man to be attractive but sometimes black women we will be drawn towards that black men knowing that we might have a better chance with him because you never know about how that white men was raised, today I don't think it is such a big deal since there is some much interracial dating going on. Also with latino we find more a bond with them, and this could be a slave mentality as you mention.

Caligula - "the stats don't bear this in mind. reality is reality, denying it because it makes you feel better is on you.

hell, apparently you're just considering it and you're nearly 30. wth did you need to "discuss it" with your friends if everybody's doing it?"

Stats? Stats of Black women who have indicated a disinterest in dating outside the Black community or stats that indicate that Black women are simply not dating outside the community, regardless of the reason? I do agree that there are not a lot of Black women who date outside the Black race, especially when compared to Black men and women from other ethnic groups. However, I do not think this is solely because they are not attracted to men outside their race. I think there are a lot of societal issues that contribute to this as well.

I am just now considering this because it was really never an option as the majority of my friends are African American. I have never been approached by a man who was not Black or a mixed race. You are right I am almost 30 (eek). Lol. I am ready to settle down and get married. Three years ago, I was not thinking about settling down really. Now that I am, I am beginning to think of all he ways that I can increase the odds of accomplishing that goal. I have definitely been attracted to men who are not Black. I did not "need" to discuss it with my friends. It was a topic that came up while we were eating brunch....just general girl talk...dam! Lol. It was a group of about 5 of us, maybe about 3 of my friends have dated outside of their race. Not in SERIOUS relationships, just dated. I have never really discussed their experiences with them about it until last week. So, it was a topic that organically came up in discussion.

"i'd treetrunk the pink off matthew mcconaughey's dick!

i don't think it's a matter of not finding white men attractive. i think it's all in our ingrained cultural perception of what it means to be a man. that perception is based far more in stereotypes than in reality. ie, of ALL races, which male racial group is likely to catch the short end of the stick?"

Now, I DO AGREE with the Mathew McConaughey comment (LMAO) and the later comment.


"a black woman who has to have a debate within herself over whether or not she could date a white man, trust, the cookiemonster is harboring a slave mentality because the reality is, you could ask the same woman if she would date a latino and there wouldn't be nearly as much hesitation."

Not sure if this comment was directed towards me (since I created the post), but just to clarify, I am not having a "debate within myself??. Like I said, it was a topic that casually came up between my girlfriends and I and it made me think, —well, why haven't I dated men outside my race? I have seen plenty who were attractive.?? I then began to think about possible cultural and societal conflicts that may exists within an interracial relationship. Not as reasoning to not date outside of my race, but just to get a better idea of some of the issues that might exists. IMO, a debate includes two opposing sides. I have no opposition to dating outside my race.

My only concern is/was that (again) I have not been approached by men outside my race (well..maybe once). Other than that, I am open to it, I just have never had that experience. Also, to me, non-Black is non-Black. So, IF I did have a reservation about dating outside my race, it would not only be directed only towards White men.

ImpressMe: That is interesting. Lol. I am sure geography plays a part in that as well. As I said before, LA is very segregated, which be one of the reasons I have not been approached too much.

I have dated white, black, and hispanic girls. I really don't think there is any difference due to race.

Posted by natural25
Also, to me, non-Black is non-Black. So, IF I did have a reservation about dating outside my race, it would not only be directed only towards White men.

You know how much shit I would catch if I made that comment?

What about the asian guy who is HUNG... no one would believe him.

Star - I agree with that geography does play a major role with this sort of thing. I have some girlfriends who live in NYC, and thy have dated out of their race alot. California is just so weird when it comes to Black women dating outside of their community.

Eli - Lol. I never have dated a Cuban man, but I am going to Miami in June. Who knows what might go down!! Lol.

Libra - To clarify, Cali made reference to me being more inclined to date a Latino man compared to a White man. IMO, every race has its own norms/traditions, which is great! Black is Black. Just like Asian is Asian and White is White, etc. Lol. So, if I were reluctant to date outside of my race it would not make a difference what ethnicity the man is my reluctance would still be an issue. I hope I did not offend anyone with my comment.

SMH @ Ever.

Posted by natural25
Libra - To clarify, Cali made reference to me being more inclined to date a Latino man compared to a White man. IMO, every race has its own norms/traditions, which is great! Black is Black. Just like Asian is Asian and White is White, etc. Lol. So, if I were reluctant to date outside of my race it would not make a difference what ethnicity the man is my reluctance would still be an issue. I hope I did not offend anyone with my comment.

Sorry, no I saw her comment and I know what you were saying. I wasn't offended and don't think anyone else should be either. Sometimes stuff just jumps out at me like that.

Posted by everevolvingepithet
His name is Wang Hung Lo.
Ladies fear his lolloping gait

I actually met a guy before named Huang Dong... the "a" is silent in the first name 😛

Posted by LibraSid

Posted by natural25
Libra - To clarify, Cali made reference to me being more inclined to date a Latino man compared to a White man. IMO, every race has its own norms/traditions, which is great! Black is Black. Just like Asian is Asian and White is White, etc. Lol. So, if I were reluctant to date outside of my race it would not make a difference what ethnicity the man is my reluctance would still be an issue. I hope I did not offend anyone with my comment.

Sorry, no I saw her comment and I know what you were saying. I wasn't offended and don't think anyone else should be either. Sometimes stuff just jumps out at me like that.

click to expand

🙂

Posted by everevolvingepithet
The cultural thing would just make things interesting.
As are/do hybrids possibly.

as long as we arent talking about reptile/human hybrids 😉



black women should date other ethnicities more

Posted by Starfish225
To a large degree its true alot of black women are not dating outside their race. And I think also alot of that has to do with geographic stuff and exposure. Alof of black women have not been exposed to a variety other races and so therefore stick to only what they know. Me myself I have never considered it but then I never felt like I had to either. Sure I have had my fair of crash and burn relationships with black men but I never felt hopeless at finding a black man that would could provide me with the things that I need and desire. And from what I know and have heard from other black women that is one reason why a black women would date out side their race. Bc Black me are not stepping up to the plate. And yes statistically it shows. Other reasons maybe because they see men as men re: of what color they are. I advise black women to date outside their race if they feel the need to. Black men dont hesistate on doing so. I do believe love can be found between two ppl no matter what color you are.

you view dating outside your race as desperation and therein lies the problem.

are you looking for a GOOD man or are you looking for a BLACK man? a black man could be good, or he could be full of shit. you in essence have resigned yourself to chocolate because it tastes good but are too skurred, limited, stubborn, naive to recognize that vanilla, rocky road, cookies and creme taste damn good too.

i dont date outside of my race because i'm "hopeless." your attitude however is.

i'll be wherever love finds me and unlike some black women, i don't resign myself to kicking rocks and turning over stones trying to find supernegro. statistically, it's asinine and emotionally, WHY? why the hell are so many beautiful, educated, talented women alone for months, years at a time? there's no reason to be alone in a world full of billions of people at yet, dumb, black bitches in america would rather go at it alone in search of some fabled black king than recognize the worth and value that exists within herself.

i'm worthy of love no matter who's giving it to me. i deserve the best and be it black, white, or in between, that's what motivates me...not the hue of his dick.

Posted by natural25


My only concern is/was that (again) I have not been approached by men outside my race (well..maybe once). Other than that, I am open to it, I just have never had that experience. Also, to me, non-Black is non-Black. So, IF I did have a reservation about dating outside my race, it would not only be directed only towards White men.

did you ever think you weren't approached by men outside of your race because you, by default, were not receptive to these men?

imagine you're at the store picking up a few items. you happen to see an attractive black dude on aisle g. you notice him, he notices you. he/you may give out signals. he/you may end up in a casual conversation and numbers are exchanged.

you make your way to aisle t and there is another black dude. he's NOT attractive. you notice that he notices you but you aint havin it. all of sudden, you have a man and in fact, you're married...yep, that's it. you're married...happily.

now ask yourself, when's the last time you noticed a white guy? when's the last time you were in a store or anywhere for that matter and sized up the white dude standing on the same aisle? when's the last time you clued in on the fact that he was checking you out? did you even care or did you instantly dismiss it?

i guarantee you've walked on by quite a few non-black men without so much as even a flicker of acknowledgment. how the hell can a man approach you when you're conditioned not to "SEE" him?

the next time you're out, decide to "SEE." decide to recognize that a man is a man is a man and they all, no matter what their color, need signs and signals. if you're open and approachable, they'll come at you. if you're close and reserved, they'll generally leave you be. that's dating 101...not white dating 101.

Posted by natural25
However, I have been thinking about not being so closed minded when it comes to who I date. I honestly have always imagined myself marrying a Black man. Nothing against men from other races, I just never thought about it.

Posted by natural25


I am not having a "debate within myself??.

made me think, —well, why haven't I dated men outside my race?

IMO, a debate includes two opposing sides. I have no opposition to dating outside my race.

click to expand

i don't "just say no to drugs" but i'll never smoke crack. i don't have to declare opposition to be against something.

by virtue of the fact that you have never considered it, that you have always wanted to date black men and black men alone (which is bullshit cause i bet you snatch up a rican/dominican if he came your way and had shit going for him), and that you are here obtaining perspective demonstrates the opposition. you ARE the opposition.

do yourself and acknowledge how beholden you are to the remnants of racism and slavery. you're a woman, an attractive woman. why the hell wouldn't any man want to hit that? let alone wife ya?

so is the debate about finding a black man vs one of another color? or should your inner struggle be more about your inability to recognize that you DESERVE to be happy and nigger never resided in you?

Posted by QuietSt0rm
my last comment sounded so ignorant.

yea it did.



overall maturity results in one looking for love in ways that are in addition to the physical.

you yourself sound pretty warped for dating black men exclusively but to each her own. frankly, if any one of my male relatives came home with a non-black bitch whom i vibed exclusively dated black men, i wouldn't like her either...wouldn't wage war but she will never be welcome to me.

my male fam member can be with whomever he likes but i'd hate knowing that such an ignant bitch was birthing/raising any of his children. there's enough historical and cultural stupidity ingrained within post-slavery african communities that some twisted fuck coming in to further it doesn't set to well with me. i aint fuckin her so eh, who cares? don't mean i gotta like the bitch though.

I know for myself some of the cultural differencescan be intimidating, but at the same time a bit refreshing and interesting.

I say I am open to it but the fact that ive never seriously done it kinda contradicts that,eh.

I do find a lot of white men sexy tho..a different sexy but sexy nonetheless.

And yes, obviously what youre exposed to will greatly impact and limit your options.

If a white woman grew up in a predominately black community, I wouldnt be surprised to see her dating mostlu black men.

"predominately" is not exclusivity.

there's something fucked about an individual who refuses to consider partnering with someone who looks like them. black or white, people with this mentality should not be allowed to reproduce. they further the divide.

frankly i find it disgusting and invariably, those that do date outside their race exclusively are only fooling themselves and their partners.


white men/women in reference to blacks, boils down to perceptions of hypersexuality.

black men/women in reference to whites, boils down to perceptions of inferiority (with respect to themselves and the "other.")

white men in reference to asians, boils down to perceptions of docility.



cultural/religious exclusivity is a whole notha ball of wax. in some cultures/religions, there is a "valid" concern/desire to partner with someone who is like one's self but seriously, "soul food" as a reason to not date someone? uhm...wow, yeah, ignorance knows no bounds.

Cali - Yes, I mentioned ealier in the thread that becasue I have never thought about dating interracially, that I might be giving off an unapproachable vibe. I agree with that.

Please clarify @ "god never resided in you?"

QS - Why do you think you have only dated Black men?

MsPices - I agree with geography being a major determining factor to who a person dates.

This is funny... I was about to make a thread on this very topic, but didn't know how to go about it without offending someone. I've only dated outside my race twice.. lasted less than a day. For some reason it just felt wrong. Not saying that other races aren't attractive (though I have to admit it is very rare that I find them to be) just seemed.. awkward.

Hi Ian! I am going to take your and Cali's advice. I'm headed to the beach with a few friends and I am going to see what men check me out and try my best to be receptive to it. Lol.

Lol @ Lovebucket! Not too many Dominicans in LA. 😢

Posted by ianthepisces
"the next time you're out, decide to "SEE." decide to recognize that a man is a man is a man and they all, no matter what their color, need signs and signals. if you're open and approachable, they'll come at you. if you're close and reserved, they'll generally leave you be. that's dating 101...not white dating 101."


this is true too..

I agree with this too. Although, I'm still rarely approached, so I guess I need to work on my smiling at strangers technique lol.

Posted by Skykomish
This is funny... I was about to make a thread on this very topic, but didn't know how to go about it without offending someone. I've only dated outside my race twice.. lasted less than a day. For some reason it just felt wrong. Not saying that other races aren't attractive (though I have to admit it is very rare that I find them to be) just seemed.. awkward.

fuck feelings.

i'm a real talk advocate...all day, everyday.

i think attraction to one's own race is healthy. it means you find value within yourself. separate from that is one's ability to find other race's attractive. i honestly believe that with respect to post-slavery cultures, the gap between black and white has less to do with reality and far more to do with centuries of indoctrination.

for myself, i operate by the triple C's...

clean
cornfed
cute!

put that all together and i'm ready to pounce...regardless of color. luckily, i found the TRIFECTA and life is gouud!

Posted by natural25

Please clarify @ "god never resided in you?"

i said n*gg3-r never resided in you. you have your filter on.