Gemini woman - Scorpio man and Pisces man

This topic was created in the Relationships forum by Gemini82ALBLN on Wednesday, September 28, 2016 and has 12 replies.
In a marriage with a Scorpio man and couldn't be any closer to misery as I am now. Mr perfect, loving, affectionate & dreamy when we were dating is now mr controlling, non affectionate, always pissed off, hard to talk to, verbally and emotionally abusive mr nightmare. He did a great job faking it for 2 years is all I can figure. So after convincing me to quit my job to stay home with my 2 kids and his 2 kids and live the "dream life" I now get bashed for it and have no financial stabilty of my own to provide for my kids so guess who is stuck? Applying for jobs non stop to have a leg to stand on again and one foot out the door just trying to make it day by day in this emotional hell and in walks PISCES!! No not another one we aren't a match was my thought process but he got me with his understanding and compassion. He dug and dug to find out every little detail of my life for weeks and shared every detail of his too without much prying from me. We've even gone so far as to spell out our perfect relationships which match identically. Then the other day I text him saying "10 more days of my beautiful pool" and he said "10 more days? What do you mean?" I explained that it was being covered in 10 days for the change of seasons and he seemed bummed like he thought I was leaving in 10 days. I had previously explained to him that until I get another job i am stuck where I am and he said he was understanding about that. Now the texts have slowed down and their substance isn't of much anymore although he still texts daily. We were at the same place at the same time earlier this week and he saw my husband and we mingled in the same crowd for over an hour. I text him after the encounter asking if he was uncomfortable continuing to talk since he "met my husband" and he said he wasn't sure it made it far more real but he'd let me know "tomorrow". That was yesterday and he never spoke a word about it. Just carried on as normal. I told him weeks ago that if at any point either of us wanted to "stop" i wanted us to agree that we could do that with no questions asked and no hard feelings. He agreed but now it seems like he's backing off because I haven't left yet but he won't tell me he wants to "stop". My question is do I just put and end to things and hope and pray he's still there when I am available or do I just carry on with the bland texts like we've been passing? He was telling me he was thinking about me all day every day and now just when I feel like my texting is aggravating him and pull back he comes at me harder. Ugh. I love and hate it at the same time. It may take weeks or months for me to get to a position where I can support my kids again on my own fully and I don't want to hurt him in the process but I also don't know if I'm just reading into it too much and he's really not interested in me like that. He keeps giving mixed signals. I need a Pisces man to help on this one!! I like him and want to give it a chance when the time is right. Do I risk
Why don't you try counseling to fix your marriage before jumping on new dick?

Posted by Metaphysicalreciprocity88
But to answer your question, from the context, it does seem like you're reading into it. You're vulnerable right now and pounced at an opportunity to "be saved" from what you described as a domestic hell.

Give yourself time.
Op...Every relationship has issues. If you get involved with the Pisces you will have your own set of problems to deal with once the honeymoon phase has faded. They may be different problems than the ones you share with the Scorpio, but they will still be problems none the less.

If you truly believe things are through with the Scorpio you owe it to both him and yourself to end the relationship before getting involved with someone else.

Your teaching your children that people are disposable and cheating is acceptable.

Think of the example your setting...
Also there is no guarantee that the pisces and you will work out. He may be attracted to the fact that you are a taken woman. He may have a captain-save-a-hoe mentality.

Once you get a job and are standing on your own two feet he may not feel the same.

You need to consider that the pisces is not a sure thing. You so called security-net might not be waiting to catch you after you burn bridges with the scorpio.
Thanks all for the comments. Let me clarify as Far as counseling goes... he refuses. He says he isn't going to talk to someone who doesn't know him or us just to have them bash him. I have contacted therapists for myself and he says that Im not using "his money" for that but if I can find a way to pay for it I can go. I have read every book I can and tried every possible scenario to remain in the marriage and staying is only putting off the inevitable at this point. it is devastating to be the only one giving your all (until recently) and the other party tearing you down despite all your efforts. I'm drained mentally and emotionally. I have never felt more suppressed and unappreciated in my life as far as my marriage goes. I have thought about my children a great deal in this or else I would've packed up and moved in with family. that would uproot them from their home, friends, sports and schools before things are firmly in place for me to provide for them by myself causing yet another change for them when I am able (having to move again as my family is all out of town). I'm not ok with the back and forth and having unnecessary chaos in my kids lives. I'm very protective of them and I can assure you they are the only reason I have remained married to this point. I failed to mention his 2 physical affairs that I cannot get over as well yet I somehow managed to hold it together through them for my kids and successfully kept them from even finding out. To assume I'm not considering them in this is not true. It's not a sexual relationship with Pisces and I wouldn't be devastated to stop communication either. It has turned towards more of an emotional affair than a shoulder to lean on.. I will agree with that and do understand that it can be just as devastating. I'm pretty sure the positive attention that he's been giving when I've been given nothing but negative at home for a long time now is what has made it "ok" in my mind for me to talk to him in such depth. Sometimes you just need a wake up call and this was that. Thanks for everyone's honesty and I'm going to send Pisces a message letting him know that I wont be continuing to talk to him and I have to get things in order for me and my children before I can concentrate on anyone or anything else (and it doesn't break my heart to do that either oddly enough). I guess I was completely over thinking something that really doesn't matter in the end. For me to be able to decide to tell him that I can't Continue without any reservations or hesitation at all proves that.
I hope it works out hun, be strong! Don't forget Lifes too short to waste time on for you or the children, strive to be happy! Now!
@hydorah

you know how to pick'em
Lean on your family, Gem. You are not alone.

It also seems that you think you will have be the sole supporter of your children. I don't know how long you've been married or what the laws are in your state(country), but a good lawyer will tell you what you are entitled to if you choose to divorce. I've heard that kids know when there is a troubled marriage and would choose to be in the better situation -- and that could mean separation from one of the parents. It's not the best scenario, but kids can be more of the "realist" in these situations and adapt fairly well.

I'm sorry to hear about your marriage and I can understand your misery, but have faith. Just like this Piscean was an encouragement and/or friend-in-need to you, there will be other sources of encouragement and support to come your way and you will be alright.
OP, I don't think you should be entertaining anyone and this pisces guy doesn't sound like he's going to do anything, he just sounds like he's there to help you heal and when you heal, he'll be gone. More like a journey so he can help you along your pain, to help ease the suffering.

Personally I think you should go to marriage counseling, and if it still doesn't work, then that's when you file divorce. but you must make an effort to be /stay together. I don't believe in ditching out, even if there is pain and suffering.

but I read he won't go... hm

he does have you under control. and you said he cheated on you 2x?? gosh, that's horrible. I would just leave, take the children and go. Run away. Leave in the middle of the night and pack your bags take your children and run.

but, sadly police will come and take you away if he calls the authorities. well, what are you gonna do???

I don't know why people call it emotional cheating, is it because he is a man??What if she is talking to her girlfriends and her grandma and mothers, aunts, who are all women teling them about her husband and needing attention? is that emotional cheating with the women too? fucking crazy shit. You can't even talk to other people in the family without people labeling it cheating. You have to shut your trap and take the abuse or else people will put you down for even talking about anything outside the marriage.

my first 2 relationships I didn't say anything to anyone. I suffered in silence. I guess it's when you get mature, older, if someone is cruel to you, then there should be no more silence. no more being a doormat.

I guess people have to label it something to manipulate you to keep quiet. and suffer silently. it worked for me. I thought if I said anything i'm gonna be yelled at for being stupid and dumb for even picking that guy in the first place. I get a lot of judgement and harassment if I did the wrong thing, or made the wrong decision.

Posted by littlenanobyte
People need to learn to read... they come for her head before reading, simply because she is a GeminiLaughing

OP you came into a very hostile environment to be born in late May-June on this site lol. I got yo back though.

the scorp cheated on her twice and she never had sex with the Pisces. She has been "emotional cheating" I guess, but post Scorpio-cheating because she feels so alone in all of this. I have been in a similar situation (not married), so I kind of understand.


it's not that bad, other signs still get fucked on,



You need to find yourself a job and get out of there. Forget about the Pisces, if your husband ever found out he would exploit it against you in the divorce, somehow. So I would focus on you getting a job and getting out.
My heart goes out to you. And I do not judge you for needing to have your emotional needs fulfilled; however, it is clearly the responsible thing to let Pisces know that you simply cannot pursue a physical relationship at this time. And while I understand the concern about uprooting the kids, if your husband is causing this much misery to you, I'm sure they are feeling it on some level as well. You also have a right to be happy. Marriage is always a challenge, but it does not need to be a living hell.