He won't commit

This topic was created in the Relationships forum by Anklebiter on Sunday, September 25, 2016 and has 22 replies.
So, I've been dating my Capricorn for almost a year. We get along great together and always have fun. I can't get him to commit. He says he doesn't want anyone else but says he doesn't want a commitment. I feel like we are committed but he just won't make it clear. Are Capricorn men normally like this? Sometimes he's so cold to me.
Posted by dolluxe
Posted by Anklebiter
So, I've been dating my Capricorn for almost a year. We get along great together and always have fun. I can't get him to commit. He says he doesn't want anyone else but says he doesn't want a commitment. I feel like we are committed but he just won't make it clear. Are Capricorn men normally like this? Sometimes he's so cold to me.
Yes. They're cold and slow to commit. Listen to your Cap. He was straightforward and told you he didn't want commitment so why keep on fighting for it? You deserve better.
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Because I want everything he has to offer. He's a good person but I would like some clarity on where this is going. I don't think I'm delusional.
maybe you bit his ankles?
A year to simply commit to not dating anyone else? You're giving him too much credit. I don't care what sign, if they can't simply state after a year that they are only with you, done. But that's just me.
Posted by dolluxe
Posted by Anklebiter
So, I've been dating my Capricorn for almost a year. We get along great together and always have fun. I can't get him to commit. He says he doesn't want anyone else but says he doesn't want a commitment. I feel like we are committed but he just won't make it clear. Are Capricorn men normally like this? Sometimes he's so cold to me.
Yes. They're cold and slow to commit. Listen to your Cap. He was straightforward and told you he didn't want commitment so why keep on fighting for it? You deserve better.
click to expand
Did I get the rare snowflake of a cap?! Mine was exclusive from the first time he met me.
Is he non-committal in his actions?? If not the you shouldn't be fussing. Watch Cappy's actions. Don't ask for verbal affirmation you likely will not get anywhere fast.
Posted by Anklebiter
Posted by dolluxe
Posted by Anklebiter
So, I've been dating my Capricorn for almost a year. We get along great together and always have fun. I can't get him to commit. He says he doesn't want anyone else but says he doesn't want a commitment. I feel like we are committed but he just won't make it clear. Are Capricorn men normally like this? Sometimes he's so cold to me.
Yes. They're cold and slow to commit. Listen to your Cap. He was straightforward and told you he didn't want commitment so why keep on fighting for it? You deserve better.
Because I want everything he has to offer. He's a good person but I would like some clarity on where this is going. I don't think I'm delusional.
click to expand
He's not offering it to you though.

I've dated two. One was 17 years ago, then 6 years ago and then we reconnected this year. He basically told me I was always the one and if I had moved to where he lived, we would have gotten married and had kids. However, he just told me this.

2nd guy was 3 years ago and we only dated for 3 months. He wouldn't commit (admittedly it was too soon) but he had also been seriously hurt by his ex wife. His friends all told me that I was the only woman he had ever brought around them in 8 years and that he must really like me, but he would never tell me that, so I broke up with him. We're actually still friends and he would get back with me but I'm not interested.

So, yes. They are slow to commit and are very cautious. Not all, I'm sure, but at least the ones I was with.
Posted by confusedlibra78
I've dated two. One was 17 years ago, then 6 years ago and then we reconnected this year. He basically told me I was always the one and if I had moved to where he lived, we would have gotten married and had kids. However, he just told me this.

2nd guy was 3 years ago and we only dated for 3 months. He wouldn't commit (admittedly it was too soon) but he had also been seriously hurt by his ex wife. His friends all told me that I was the only woman he had ever brought around them in 8 years and that he must really like me, but he would never tell me that, so I broke up with him. We're actually still friends and he would get back with me but I'm not interested.

So, yes. They are slow to commit and are very cautious. Not all, I'm sure, but at least the ones I was with.


' I was always the one and if I had moved to where

he lived, we would have gotten married and had kids.

However, he just told me this.'


That's bullshit.

You didn't get married because he didn't propose.

Not because you didn't bend to his will (nor should you).

Sorry to be coarse, but that's on him-- not you.

Posted by Anklebiter
So, I've been dating my Capricorn for almost a year. We get along great together and always have fun. I can't get him to commit. He says he doesn't want anyone else but says he doesn't want a commitment. I feel like we are committed but he just won't make it clear. Are Capricorn men normally like this? Sometimes he's so cold to me.


It's alright to say that's not enough.

There's nothing wrong with wanting more.

If he's not willing then it may be that you're

not a good match.

And really... why should he if you're going to

settle for it?


Js

Posted by LillyPetal
Posted by dolluxe
Posted by Anklebiter
So, I've been dating my Capricorn for almost a year. We get along great together and always have fun. I can't get him to commit. He says he doesn't want anyone else but says he doesn't want a commitment. I feel like we are committed but he just won't make it clear. Are Capricorn men normally like this? Sometimes he's so cold to me.
Yes. They're cold and slow to commit. Listen to your Cap. He was straightforward and told you he didn't want commitment so why keep on fighting for it? You deserve better.
Did I get the rare snowflake of a cap?! Mine was exclusive from the first time he met me.
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Nah thats not true ladies! Earth signs might be slower to commit but on the other hand they would never(!) leave anything to chance if they decided that he/she is the one!

If you are a caps first and best option than you will be cuffed in a blink of an eye Winking if u r only second then he might take a year after juggling his other options and might settle for you until he finds better.

You will be better off moving on. Find a guy that sees you as first and best "option" and who is courting you in a proper and mature way. That guy u hanging on to is ready for commitment, just not with you.

Good luck

Posted by Montgomery
Posted by confusedlibra78
I've dated two. One was 17 years ago, then 6 years ago and then we reconnected this year. He basically told me I was always the one and if I had moved to where he lived, we would have gotten married and had kids. However, he just told me this.

2nd guy was 3 years ago and we only dated for 3 months. He wouldn't commit (admittedly it was too soon) but he had also been seriously hurt by his ex wife. His friends all told me that I was the only woman he had ever brought around them in 8 years and that he must really like me, but he would never tell me that, so I broke up with him. We're actually still friends and he would get back with me but I'm not interested.

So, yes. They are slow to commit and are very cautious. Not all, I'm sure, but at least the ones I was with.


' I was always the one and if I had moved to where

he lived, we would have gotten married and had kids.

However, he just told me this.'


That's bullshit.

You didn't get married because he didn't propose.

Not because you didn't bend to his will (nor should you).

Sorry to be coarse, but that's on him-- not you.

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Sorry, I didn't make it clear. I was planning to move there on my own. When we reconnected, I said to him, so if I had ended up moving there where would our relationship have gone and he said we would have gotten married and had kids. I broke it off with him all 3 times we were together.

Posted by Anklebiter
So, I've been dating my Capricorn for almost a year....


Dating for a year? That sounds like "I'm waiting this out just incase something better comes along".... to me. Sorry. No one needs 365 days to determine if they want to commit to someone.

This may have been asked and answered already, but is he clearly saying "I don't want a relationship" or simple not interested in labeling you're relationship? If he has any Sag placements this may be more about the dislike of labels. I personally don't like them, but am very committed to my partner(s).

Putting that aside, you can't make anyone commit. Why on earth would you want to? You know you want him without any coercing right? Shouldn't he?

I feel like I'm inclined to respond to this seeing as I'm a Capricorn female who ALSO doesn't particularly want to fancy the thought of marriage right about now. (Hah)

There could be a number of reasons other than him just being slow to commit to you, and trust me when I say he most likely does love you with all his heart, but he probably doesn't want to completely commit to you for reasons he's quietly felt over by himself because Capricorns think and do by themselves (I'm so guilty of this). It could be he doesn't feel comfortable with the idea now, as right now he could leave at any time he wants if the relationship does go sour, or it could be he doesn't feel like he won't be able to provide for you. It could even be that he currently cannot even fathom the thought of marriage because he may not entirely be sure about you.

I know these may sound like troubling reasons, but I suppose we can't help what we feel. And we Caps can be entirely selfish sometimes. But then again, it's only been around a year! So if you stay with him and vice versa for longer, I can't say how long because it always depends, he may think about it, fantasize about it, yadda, yadda.

Personally, if my significant other wanted to marry me in a year or less, I'd feel a bit of discomfort. Like I'm just being rushed into something BIG. And marriage is BIG. I know many websites don't stress how much we value our time and significance in a relationship, so I'd say he may not want it to be a waste by disappointing you or being disappointed. But either way, like many others have said, just wait, and don't rush. Rushing marriage is like hitting us with a stick and telling us to go away.
"I'm not ready for commitment" really means I'm just not that into you. I bet if his dream girl appeared he would have no issues committing. Don't hurt yourself fighting for nothing. This isn't a cap man thing it's a person thing. People go after exactly what they want in life, remember that sis.
If a man says he doesnt want a relationship but still does relationship things, hes bout to f..u..ck up 2 years of your life.
Lots of Caps are having lots of problems today. I wonder why
Posted by DMV
If a man says he doesnt want a relationship but still does relationship things, hes bout to f..u..ck up 2 years of your life.
Lmao!! I can't tell you how true this is!! On point
Posted by Capri-sun
Posted by bkbella86
"I'm not ready for commitment" really means I'm just not that into you. I bet if his dream girl appeared he would have no issues committing. Don't hurt yourself fighting for nothing. This isn't a cap man thing it's a person thing. People go after exactly what they want in life, remember that sis.
Depends on the situation. In most cases, you are right. However there are exceptions to this.
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And to reference the movie again, the exception and the rule. It's a rule for a reason because it is most certainly the case in most scenarios like this. Who cares about the exception? That's who women deluxe themselves. if she was the exception she wouldn't be here. She would be sure.
Posted by Anklebiter
Posted by dolluxe
Posted by Anklebiter
So, I've been dating my Capricorn for almost a year. We get along great together and always have fun. I can't get him to commit. He says he doesn't want anyone else but says he doesn't want a commitment. I feel like we are committed but he just won't make it clear. Are Capricorn men normally like this? Sometimes he's so cold to me.
Yes. They're cold and slow to commit. Listen to your Cap. He was straightforward and told you he didn't want commitment so why keep on fighting for it? You deserve better.
Because I want everything he has to offer. He's a good person but I would like some clarity on where this is going. I don't think I'm delusional.
click to expand


But he's not offering you what you want.

Posted by Capri-sun
Posted by bkbella86
Posted by Capri-sun
Posted by bkbella86
"I'm not ready for commitment" really means I'm just not that into you. I bet if his dream girl appeared he would have no issues committing. Don't hurt yourself fighting for nothing. This isn't a cap man thing it's a person thing. People go after exactly what they want in life, remember that sis.
Depends on the situation. In most cases, you are right. However there are exceptions to this.
And to reference the movie again, the exception and the rule. It's a rule for a reason because it is most certainly the case in most scenarios like this. Who cares about the exception? That's who women deluxe themselves. if she was the exception she wouldn't be here. She would be sure.


Those who base relationships off of more than just words.

Again, not always the case.
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Duh nothing is certain in life. We can say "that's not always the case" for anything in life. What's your point?

Posted by DMV
If a man says he doesnt want a relationship but still does relationship things, hes bout to f..u..ck up 2 years of your life.


LOL!!!!!!