How to tell if he/she is Financially Responsible?

This topic was created in the Relationships forum by truecap on Wednesday, March 20, 2013 and has 28 replies.
So, how can you tell whether or not someone is financially responsible? What clues you in? What do you watch for?
Can't go by clothes or car or living arrangement - they could be in debt up to their eyeballs. By the same token, they could have a run down car, dress shabby and live modestly, while they have lots of money in the bank.
Since you can't go by appearance, what other things do you notice?



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Posted by Mr. Defense
I personally don't think anyone should buy a house these days especially if you're childless and single. If you're single AMD want a house its a red flag. Why? It's a bad investment that could go towards something else. I find the market to be way too volatile for those type or long term commitments to begin to make sensed especially if you don't really need them. If you have q few kidsx then its cool to put them in q house, but otherwise no. So I would question q woman's ability to invest if she's pursuing things like that.


I think this is the dumbest statement ever, no offense.
When you pay rent, you are throwing away money every single month. You are paying someone else's rent, and you get nothing to show for it. It does not help your credit score, you get no equity, and in fact, it's a lot more expensive than paying a mortgage.
Currently I rent a house. I could buy a house at least $ 200 a month cheaper than I am paying now. I pay all the utilities, water, sewer. The only thing I do not pay for is for the lawn to be mowed and if anything were to break in the house, and trash removal. But that isn't $ 200 worth every month.
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Hard to say trucap!
My Cappie stepsister loves to spend and to anyone else not clued in they always think she's quite stable and well off financially. If anything to me it seems she has a stability in keeping her debt under 10 grand lol Tongue
My cappie friend on the other hand does the same but always squaring things off to no debt yet having very similar life style s.
For me personally I've never borrowed not even from a financial institution so I only spend on what I've saved or can afford but people just assume I spend mindlessly or always affording new gadgets to play with.
As for owning a house? I'll admit perhaps one day I'll need to borrow but I won't like it.
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I hid my post, because I re-read after Sweet Libra's post.
Are you saying that if someone is in debt than they are not responsible?
Because I think most people have debt, and it is unrealistic to think that people would be debt free. Especially single people, because you are bearing the entire load of everything on yourself: rent, food, etc.
Personally, for me, it is how the person handles their money that makes them financially responsible.
I don't have a lot of money in the bank, but I do pay my bills on time and I live within my means.
And so does my boyfriend.
I consider him financially responsible because he pays his bills. He also says things like, "I can't afford xyz because I have rent/car/whatever due", and he does not use credit cards.
He and I have been talking about moving in together, so we have talked about our financial situations. We know the grand total of debt that we each have, and we are trying to come up with a plan for paying it off.
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Posted by SweetLibra
Is there any amount of debt that would be acceptable or that you be willing to overlook when choosing a partner? How much is too much? Most people have something right? Credit cards, mortgage, student loans, etc..
Unless your super smart like A-noz that is smile.


Haha gracias! Although I'm not sure if it's smart or just being paranoid at the idea of a debt Tongue
Capgirl, I don't think that's what she meant because it's a fact debt given certain life style s is almost impossible. The only debt I think I've had was my government grant for university and I paid that off so quickly even did hours at work just so I didn't feel like I had something looming over me. It'd be too naive for me to think debts are always bad Tongue
Just on my sister's example this is where I said it's hard to tell. Her credit rating is still good if you were to view it strictly on a financial standpoint. But factoring in the fact she borrows a lot from her family one starts to wonder just why and where she's spending all that money.
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@Mr. Defense: I hear what you are saying, but no matter what, you need to have somewhere to live. Either way you have to pay for it. So if you lose your job, how do you pay your rent? Same situation.
I was a homeowner from age 25-36 (I was married). I gave up the house in the divorce because the mortgage was too high for me to handle on my own.
I am not trying to convince you to buy a house, but I don't think buying a house is a red flag at all. Like cheeky said, if you own a house, you obviously had to work hard to buy the house. Yes, it is debt, but eventually you will own your house. And you can write off the interest. It really burns me to pay someone else's mortgage and then some, and they get a tax write off and I get nothing. lol.
I know the economy has been terrible, but I refuse to live in fear that I won't have a job tomorrow. I'm smart and I work hard, there is something I can do. There has to be.
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@ Seraph:
I have a few reasons for asking. One is my coworkers and I were discussing it. Two is I know what I notice, curious to what other people thought, so I could look objectively at myself to see how I might come across. Three Mr Aqua and I are always discussing our financial situations and plans and goals.
Basically, just thought it'd make a good thread.
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How much is too much credit card debt? In my opinion, credit card debt should be less than $ 2500. Feasable to pay off and not an extravagant amount of spending. More than that is living beyond your means and that's what gets you in trouble.
Home ownership - to me, is a plus. With every monthly payment you are earning equity. It's cheaper than rent. It's your piece of dirt and no one can come tell you what to do or what not to do. It is quite impressive, to me, if a single person owned their own home (as long as it is realistically in their means) - not easy to get on your own.
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I never said it was wrong to have debt. My goal is to become debt free with the exception of a house/car which are not necessarily bad debt.
In my opinion, a lot of credit card debt is unacceptable. Of course, almost everyone has some.
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Posted by tiziani
Isn't living beyond your means relative to your income/assets though?


Your living style is relevant to your income. But, living beyond your means is a recipe for disaster and irresponsible.
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Posted by tiziani
Posted by truecap
Posted by tiziani
Isn't living beyond your means relative to your income/assets though?


Your living style is relevant to your income. But, living beyond your means is a recipe for disaster and irresponsible.


Oh yeah I definitely agree that living beyond your means is a means to a premature end. I just meant, it's hard to put an actual figure on what is acceptable/unacceptable debt since it is relative to the other side of the balance sheet IMO.
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Gotcha!
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Posted by Mr. Defense
Posted by truecap
I never said it was wrong to have debt. My goal is to become debt free with the exception of a house/car which are not necessarily bad debt.
In my opinion, a lot of credit card debt is unacceptable. Of course, almost everyone has some.



I woulnd't call them good debt. It's only good because you could possibly own either one of them. It's bad because if you can't pay them, the banks get's ownership of them, and it puts you into a massive amount of debt. The thing you don't recongnize (and this goes for a lot of people) is that they are huge risk. So really your thought process needs to go a little deeper. Is the risk even worth it? It depends. With children and marriage then YES, it is worth it to have a lot of money tied up in a car or a house. This is only for practical reasons though, as it's hard to raise a child(children) in an apartment. The car is PRACTICAL, because you need to be able to drop kids off at school, pick them up, and get to work.
When you're single you REALLY don't have those concerns. Especially when you're talking about single with NO children. So I would honestly question someone who is single with NO children as to why they're creating high risk debt for themselves when there is no logical or pratical reason to do this.
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I understand your point of view. It is risky if you're single because if you do lose your job, you don't have the security of a spouse to help pick up the slack. The job market is so unstable these days.
Yep, I have a quandry. Trying to sell my house for divorce settlement. I'm okay with that because it is too much land and too big for me. I have a teenage son who lives with me part time. So am I going to buy or rent? Both have the pluses and minuses.
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I drive 72 miles one way to work. I had a Ford Expedition, nice vehicle. Paid for though. I so wanted to get another SUV, but went practical and got a gas efficient car. So, I kept the Expedition (it's 8 years old) for my teen to drive (not having to buy another car).
Does that sound more practical to you, Mr D? smile
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Posted by Mr. Defense
Posted by truecap
snip




I understand your point of view. It is risky if you're single because if you do lose your job, you don't have the security of a spouse to help pick up the slack. The job market is so unstable these days.
Yep, I have a quandry. Trying to sell my house for divorce settlement. I'm okay with that because it is too much land and too big for me. I have a teenage son who lives with me part time. So am I going to buy or rent? Both have the pluses and minuses.
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Yes, it is a buyers market, not a sellers market. Having problems selling your home is VERY typical. I have a co-worker who has 6 kids and a wife. He wants to move out to Atlanta where he could get a bigger house for less. Since my team is in multiple locations, he can relocate to Atlanta and work out of that office. He is unable to do anything because he can't get his house sold.


If you're in the market to buy, though, you can get a good deal right now!
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Posted by LIBRA1234
Posted by truecap
How much is too much credit card debt? In my opinion, credit card debt should be less than $ 2500. Feasable to pay off and not an extravagant amount of spending. More than that is living beyond your means and that's what gets you in trouble.
Home ownership - to me, is a plus. With every monthly payment you are earning equity. It's cheaper than rent. It's your piece of dirt and no one can come tell you what to do or what not to do. It is quite impressive, to me, if a single person owned their own home (as long as it is realistically in their means) - not easy to get on your own.



My belief is to have $ 0 dept on the credit card if you can make it. I never paid CC interest. I used CC to build history and to avoid headache over security (CC do deal with theft and refunds better than debit cards). I do have an apt I purchased in so flo which I kept but the only reason why I kept it is because I didn't lose much when the crash happened. I have few friends who went for foreclosure and short sale since they had to move somewhere else for work and leasing was just not enough to cover all the expenses (rent + maintenance)...
I think buying a house even as a single person can be more beneficial than renting if you don't live in an overpriced city. If you for ex live in Miami and you buy an apt, you have to pay loan + maintenance fees, which sometimes can come up to $ 1,000. That can be a burden for a single person.


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I hear that!!
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Posted by CluelessCancer
Great thread. I hate debt and debt hates me.
I want to make enough money where I can pay off a house in 5 years and just be done with the shit.


+10000
If I could buy one cash I would
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Posted by TheMoodyVulcan
.... it's not a good idea to have usable equity locked up in a housing asset while the seller's market is such a bitch.




That's untrue. On the books it may look like a buyers market, but, in reality, it's the sellers market.
And furthermore, your statement makes the assumption that how the trends are now, is how they will be in the future.
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I can tell my Pisces is financially responsible because he, paid his house off in 10 years, paid his truck off in 5 years, and although he thinks I have more money then him he pays for everything we do.
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Posted by CluelessCancer
Posted by BeautifulLocs
I can tell my Pisces is financially responsible because he, paid his house off in 10 years, paid his truck off in 5 years, and although he thinks I have more money then him he pays for everything we do.


are you sure he's a pisces?
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Yea he's a Pisces March 7.
Him
Sun - Pisces
Moon - Taurus
Venus - Pisces
Mar - Aqua
Me
Scorpio
Moon- Sag
Venus - Libra
Mar - Scorpio
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@Mr.Defense

"In my opinion, no single person with no kids should own a house. I have a good reason for saying that. There is no logical reason why a single person should be buying a home. Unless you run into a very big sum of money and you could pay it off easily, there is really no point."
My Pisces is 48, married 1 time for 5 years when he was in his 20's Got divorce saved for a house and paid it off in 10 years and lives a drama free life.
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Posted by CluelessCancer
Posted by BeautifulLocs
Posted by CluelessCancer
Posted by BeautifulLocs
I can tell my Pisces is financially responsible because he, paid his house off in 10 years, paid his truck off in 5 years, and although he thinks I have more money then him he pays for everything we do.


are you sure he's a pisces?


Yea he's a Pisces March 7.
Him
Sun - Pisces
Moon - Taurus
Venus - Pisces
Mar - Aqua
Me
Scorpio
Moon- Sag
Venus - Libra
Mar - Scorpio



Great catch. I want a MAN like that! Cause that's how I think!

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He does sound wonderful. Great catch, lady!
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@ ClulessCancer & lisaBethere8 Thanks!! I have a thread about him on the Scorpio Board "Pisces w/Taurus Moon" He is wonderfful guy if you read the thread you will get a better insight of him.
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Posted by BeautifulLocs
.... paid his truck off in 5 years ....




considering that this was said for intentions of trying to appear out of the ordinary .... a big lol, now THAT was funny !!!
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Posted by CluelessCancer
Posted by P-Angel
Posted by BeautifulLocs
.... paid his truck off in 5 years ....




considering that this was said for intentions of trying to appear out of the ordinary .... a big lol, now THAT was funny !!!


LMAO! I was impressed by the house. Now that's a big deal.
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Why is it such a big deal? You find it impossible that a person can pay off a debt so early? He is single with no children, been on his job at the White House for 29 years, he makes good money and the only responsibility he has is himself. He has no bills other than the normal utilities and taxes he pays on his house. He has goals and he works towards them. I don't have problem with a man that knows what he wants and knows how to make his money work for him not him working for money. I don't have no bills as well other then, my utilities and rent for my apartment and my phone. I have A1 credit and it's a good feeling to know that we don't owe anyone ANYTHING.
The least of our worries is we don't have to stress over having to pay creditors like most of americans will be doing until they are dead.
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I agree with Mr D.
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The only way to really find out is by being with that person for some time. Debt isnt attractive and I cant see people being upfront about that, at least in the early stages of the union. I do believe there are people who have no debt out there its possible, I dont have any. Never even had a credit card, straight cash, im almost afraid to get one now because I am afraid to have debt, dont like the feeling of owing anyone a thing, its too stressful.
Also there are some people who never tend to their debt, they keep putting it off, or paying the bare minimum. That to me isnt financially responsible and would be a red flag.
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Posted by harry99
Posted by truecap
So, how can you tell whether or not someone is financially responsible? What clues you in? What do you watch for?
Can't go by clothes or car or living arrangement - they could be in debt up to their eyeballs. By the same token, they could have a run down car, dress shabby and live modestly, while they have lots of money in the bank.
Since you can't go by appearance, what other things do you notice?




Do Capricorns really worry about these ridiculous things lol.
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Yes, I believe we do. Especially if we are considering someone for long term. Money management says a lot about a person's life style and personal choices.
OH! Cappys NEVER think financial subjects are ridiculous! lol! Tongue
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Posted by CluelessCancer
Posted by BeautifulLocs
Posted by CluelessCancer
Posted by P-Angel
Posted by BeautifulLocs
.... paid his truck off in 5 years ....




considering that this was said for intentions of trying to appear out of the ordinary .... a big lol, now THAT was funny !!!


LMAO! I was impressed by the house. Now that's a big deal.


Why is it such a big deal? You find it impossible that a person can pay off a debt so early? He is single with no children, been on his job at the White House for 29 years, he makes good money and the only responsibility he has is himself. He has no bills other than the normal utilities and taxes he pays on his house. He has goals and he works towards them. I don't have problem with a man that knows what he wants and knows how to make his money work for him not him working for money. I don't have no bills as well other then, my utilities and rent for my apartment and my phone. I have A1 credit and it's a good feeling to know that we don't owe anyone ANYTHING.
The least of our worries is we don't have to stress over having to pay creditors like most of americans will be doing until they are dead.


It's a big deal to me cause that's how I operate or would like to operate. So that's the image of success in my mind.
debt free and ownership of a home (Cancers, we need homes)

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I agree!
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