I Regret Being Judgmental..
This topic was created in the Relationships forum by slowdive80 on Tuesday, December 18, 2018 and has 8 replies.
When it comes to other singles hooking up with taken people. But only others hooking up with people who's partners/spouses who they dont know or are not friends with.
Getting older, I understand the appeal if you are just looking for a casual lay. Taken brings drama in terms of their partner/spouse finding out BUT in terms of them getting attached to you, it's somewhat less when compared to other singles.
Taken people can still get attached to people they are fooling around with dont get me wrong but as not as much as when it happens with other singles doing the FB thing.
It's hard finding single women out there who are strictly DTF. They are out there, but not a huge amount. Because either half of them were raised with conservative attitudes towards sex - (waiting until they find someone that is relationship material) or falling in love with someone solely off lust and sexual chemistry.
I want to be clear - I think it is fine with people that want to wait till they find someone that may be relationship material. Good for them.
I do take issue however, with people past their early 20's that still fall in love based off the fact that someone gave them an orgasm. That is immature, and sadly a lot of that is around.
But see right now for me, I dont have time nor am in a good situation personally or financially to have a relationship. All I can right now is FWB until I move in February of next year. So I have no issue if out of the blue, a girl that's taken wants to knock boots with me.
BUT.. that's only if I dont know the guy she is dating. If a guy was a friend I would tell her to get lost. But someone I dont know? Not my problem.
I mean hell, if I dated a girl that cheated on me with a stranger, I am not going to be mad at him since I dont know him. I would be mad at her
I do wish the dating scene for singles was easier in terms of doing fwb, but it is not. I'll never judge someone again thats single doing a fwb with someone taken provided they are not friends with or related to the spouse.
Anyone else come to that conclusion when looking for an fb situation?
Getting older, I understand the appeal if you are just looking for a casual lay. Taken brings drama in terms of their partner/spouse finding out BUT in terms of them getting attached to you, it's somewhat less when compared to other singles.
Taken people can still get attached to people they are fooling around with dont get me wrong but as not as much as when it happens with other singles doing the FB thing.
It's hard finding single women out there who are strictly DTF. They are out there, but not a huge amount. Because either half of them were raised with conservative attitudes towards sex - (waiting until they find someone that is relationship material) or falling in love with someone solely off lust and sexual chemistry.
I want to be clear - I think it is fine with people that want to wait till they find someone that may be relationship material. Good for them.
I do take issue however, with people past their early 20's that still fall in love based off the fact that someone gave them an orgasm. That is immature, and sadly a lot of that is around.
But see right now for me, I dont have time nor am in a good situation personally or financially to have a relationship. All I can right now is FWB until I move in February of next year. So I have no issue if out of the blue, a girl that's taken wants to knock boots with me.
BUT.. that's only if I dont know the guy she is dating. If a guy was a friend I would tell her to get lost. But someone I dont know? Not my problem.
I mean hell, if I dated a girl that cheated on me with a stranger, I am not going to be mad at him since I dont know him. I would be mad at her
I do wish the dating scene for singles was easier in terms of doing fwb, but it is not. I'll never judge someone again thats single doing a fwb with someone taken provided they are not friends with or related to the spouse.
Anyone else come to that conclusion when looking for an fb situation?
No personally, I don't think I would feel safe with another women's significant other. Do you know how many crimes are committed because of such things? Sex is not worth that to me. People who do it are 100% risk takers in my opinion
@SAG888-
I totally respect that and dont blame you. For me if I am hooking up with a taken woman, I keep it to one time usually. And really feel them out to make sure they arent the type to fall in love based off sex.
If I am getting a bad vibe I dont even go through with it.
Otherwise I am very clear with them after the fact it is a one time thing.
I am not saying sexual chemistry isnt an attraction builder because it is. But to fall in love with someone solely on that with no mental connection? That's a teenager's mentality to me.
Maybe I got my mom's venus in virgo mentality where personality and character are essential traits for me to fall in love with someone.
I totally respect that and dont blame you. For me if I am hooking up with a taken woman, I keep it to one time usually. And really feel them out to make sure they arent the type to fall in love based off sex.
If I am getting a bad vibe I dont even go through with it.
Otherwise I am very clear with them after the fact it is a one time thing.
I am not saying sexual chemistry isnt an attraction builder because it is. But to fall in love with someone solely on that with no mental connection? That's a teenager's mentality to me.
Maybe I got my mom's venus in virgo mentality where personality and character are essential traits for me to fall in love with someone.
Posted by slowdive80famous last words, my friend
@SAG888-
I totally respect that and dont blame you. For me if I am hooking up with a taken woman, I keep it to one time usually. And really feel them out to make sure they arent the type to fall in love based off sex.
If I am getting a bad vibe I dont even go through with it.
Otherwise I am very clear with them after the fact it is a one time thing.
I am not saying sexual chemistry isnt an attraction builder because it is. But to fall in love with someone solely on that with no mental connection? That's a teenager's mentality to me.
Maybe I got my mom's venus in virgo mentality where personality and character are essential traits for me to fall in love with someone.
Posted by slowdive80Like if you can help it if chemistry get you hard!
@SAG888-
I totally respect that and dont blame you. For me if I am hooking up with a taken woman, I keep it to one time usually. And really feel them out to make sure they arent the type to fall in love based off sex.
If I am getting a bad vibe I dont even go through with it.
Otherwise I am very clear with them after the fact it is a one time thing.
I am not saying sexual chemistry isnt an attraction builder because it is. But to fall in love with someone solely on that with no mental connection? That's a teenager's mentality to me.
Maybe I got my mom's venus in virgo mentality where personality and character are essential traits for me to fall in love with someone.
There's plenty of willing fwb situations out there. You don't have to get with someone else's woman to find that.
When does your jerry springer episode air?
It will probably be a Maury episode. But no, I am pretty discreet if I hook up with a taken person
I ask for email instead of phone number preferably work one.
And I use an email with a different name just to cover my tracks.
Plus I would never hookup where I or she live. Not happening, hotel all the way.
And if that is too weird for them, tough luck.
If I am going to hook up with someone taken whose significant other i dont know it is usally just one time.
You have to understand that where I live is nothing but college age girls. And the only ones down for just hooking up usually give themselves liquid courage to do so.
Sorry, but when someone is not 100% cognizant of what they are doing and then dealing with a potential rape accusation because of her having buyer's remorse is not my thing.
Never hooked up with a drunk girl even though I have had opportunities. Besides, someone that has to get drunk to have casual sex is a complete turn off for me.
I am trying to move out of the town I live so I have more opportunities to date at least late 20's to 30's.
I am focused on moving but if I meet an attractive girl who wants to hook up, I am not going to dismiss because she is taken.
I ask for email instead of phone number preferably work one.
And I use an email with a different name just to cover my tracks.
Plus I would never hookup where I or she live. Not happening, hotel all the way.
And if that is too weird for them, tough luck.
If I am going to hook up with someone taken whose significant other i dont know it is usally just one time.
You have to understand that where I live is nothing but college age girls. And the only ones down for just hooking up usually give themselves liquid courage to do so.
Sorry, but when someone is not 100% cognizant of what they are doing and then dealing with a potential rape accusation because of her having buyer's remorse is not my thing.
Never hooked up with a drunk girl even though I have had opportunities. Besides, someone that has to get drunk to have casual sex is a complete turn off for me.
I am trying to move out of the town I live so I have more opportunities to date at least late 20's to 30's.
I am focused on moving but if I meet an attractive girl who wants to hook up, I am not going to dismiss because she is taken.
Leave Your Feedback
We'd love to hear your thoughts! If you're not logged in, you can still share your feedback below. Your input helps us improve the experience for everyone. To post your own content or join the conversation, please log in or create an account.
Related Topics
Talking to a sag guy on phone And I was texting my mom at the same time ... and when I went back on the phone I was about to tell him a story , but he stopped me and said “wait , I want to hear more about your family dynamic ... u can continue your story
@Lil_ladie_tauries
Joined: Sep 30, 2018 · Topics: 2 · Posts: 10
Our charts:
Me:
Rising Virgo
Sun Virgo
Moon Scorpio
Mercury Virgo
Venus Leo
Mars Taurus
Him:
Rising Not sure, may be Leo
Sun Aries
Moon Leo
Mercury Taurus
Venus Aries
Mars Gemini
Hi all, I need some outside perspective on thi
@Candance15
Joined: Dec 17, 2018 · Topics: 2 · Posts: 7
https://bgr.com/2018/12/15/google-search-should-i-most-popular-states/
Word to California:"No, stay there. We dont want your lunacy in the rest of the country"
@CancerOnTheCusp
Joined: Oct 17, 2013 · Topics: 308 · Posts: 8654
In my chart, I have a Scorpio Moon singleton (the only other water is my Chiron in Scorpio) and a Capricorn Sun singleton (if we don't count Neptune in Capricorn as it is a generational planet). The bulk of my chart is Aquarian with 2 planets in Sagittari
@Jarax
Joined: Apr 10, 2018 · Topics: 61 · Posts: 255
Houses included as well.
@Jarax
Joined: Apr 10, 2018 · Topics: 61 · Posts: 255
As I've been thinking about the cases I will file against Ands, I cannot help but laugh at the possibility of manifesting in open court how the controversy really began...
I really think it's weird and different... and possibly awkward or even laughable.
@firebunny
Joined: Dec 21, 2011 · Topics: 1686 · Posts: 16295
Ok men. When you know somebody for a short period of time and conversation is touching a subject where your partner or prospective partner asking you to be open if you are having change of heart - and you reply ‘I am not going anywhere’ and later on once
@Gemitati
Joined: Aug 04, 2015 · Topics: 1026 · Posts: 38091
Can anyone please help me what I did wrong or is it she is being self centered?
Well this cancer girl, she is my friend and its been 2 years for our friendship. Months ago I confronted her about why she was being mean with this another girl in our group.
@Ronscorp30
Joined: Dec 15, 2018 · Topics: 3 · Posts: 6
Hi,
I started a relationship with a Libra man but I'm so confused with his actions. I'm a Cancer female.
When we're together he says that he loves me and treats me like a princess but lately he doesn't message me or communicate as much as he used to. I'v
@angie2080
Joined: Nov 28, 2016 · Topics: 29 · Posts: 62
Capricorns, what personality traits define who you are, who you were, or tying to become?
@SureShotCap
Joined: Feb 18, 2013 · Topics: 6 · Posts: 828