i'm scared to talk to girls..plz help..

This topic was created in the Relationships forum by popsun on Wednesday, April 16, 2014 and has 20 replies.
during my college days i had a friend who was very close to me. we used to share everything and most of the time be together. she was treating me as a good friend..even i was treating her as a good friend.i liked to be close to her. i once asked her can i sit on your lap..i did not hav any bad intentions..i just wanted to be close to her..i feel lap sitting is jus one of the ways of being close and affectionate to someone. its not like having sex..but she took it in an wrong way, made it a big issue and made me feel guilty.we didn't talk to each other for few days. now she talks to me sometimes and v eventually finished college.
but after that incident i feel scared to talk to a girl..i feel paranoid, self conscious and tentative when i talk to a girl. i try to avoid talking to a girl in most of the occasions..how do i come out of this please advice.
details
Are you half Canine half Human? Why not sniff her butt? Dogs show affection that way? Seriously? In what planet does a man sit on a woman's lap to show affection? My dog sits on my wife's lap to show affection, but unless you have white hair, four legs, long ears, and answer to the name Snoopy, you pretty much screwed up. I don't want to assume, so I will ask: Are you a man or a woman? You didn't specify in your post. What's wrong with showing affection with flowers? You really went out for the exotic. With your thought process, I would be scared to talk to girls also. It's like you really have no clue. If this is a real post, reply to my questions and I may be inclined to give you some pointers. If not, I will assume this post was a joke. Ha Ha!!!
details
You asked her if you could sit in her lap? Now I've heard everythingLaughing
details
Posted by popsun
during my college days i had a friend who was very close to me. we used to share everything and most of the time be together. she was treating me as a good friend..even i was treating her as a good friend.i liked to be close to her. i once asked her can i sit on your lap..i did not hav any bad intentions..i just wanted to be close to her..i feel lap sitting is jus one of the ways of being close and affectionate to someone. its not like having sex..but she took it in an wrong way, made it a big issue and made me feel guilty.we didn't talk to each other for few days. now she talks to me sometimes and v eventually finished college.
but after that incident i feel scared to talk to a girl..i feel paranoid, self conscious and tentative when i talk to a girl. i try to avoid talking to a girl in most of the occasions..how do i come out of this please advice.


are you firebunny's alternate account?
details
This some funny ish here
details
This some funny ish here
details

details
You ask for help but no one else can provide the help you want. This is something you must choose to overcome yourself.
As you can see almost everyone who replied chose to mock you. And more who know will do the same the longer you continue to wallow in your helplessness.

details
The only time a young adult has wanted to sit in my was my daughter and she just wanted a mummy cuddle. It was bazaar but I guess she needed it.
I would not understand a man asking the same. You need to look at your maturity and relationship with your mother, did you miss out there?
What you've done by asking this girl this, is in fact insult and offend her and probably totally confused her, whether or not she was interested in you sexually before. You've changed the dynamics of the situation by coming off as a man child.
details
Half of the people laughing probably don't have the best game with the opposite sex either so....
Not to mention there are literally thousands upon thousands of books/articles advising both men & women on how to approach, hook & attract the opposite or same sex. Books/articles that millions of people read, share & buy. So clearly, the aspect of someone being shy, unconfident, etc. is a common problem everywhere. No need to laugh at 1 in a billion people that have at some point also struggled with how to approach the person they're attracted to.
@Popsun: Are you a lesbian? My automatic assumption was that you were man, but if you're a woman who's bisexual or a lesbian, you being shy & confused about how to approach women is perfectly normal. Def. a common problem.
The lap thing would make a little sense if you're a woman especially considering women are known for holding hands, sleeping in the same beds together, hugging a lot or sitting on each other's laps. Stuff like that may only be something you see most with very young folks, lol but still nonetheless, I'm not gonna sit here & act like I've never seen a woman sit on another woman's lap OR a man & woman sitting in a posture that may seem odd or misunderstood to others.
details
LMAO
details
My Libra PUA friend pulled this off beautifully.
He even had chicks coming over to his place bringing pizza and then just going away. He'd kiss them at the door and they'd part.
Saw this shit with my own eyes.
details
This poor guy. He asks to sit on some chic's lap and she ridicules him and he can't talk to girls anymore. He comes here for help and asks what he should do and we give it to him worse. He's gonna be afraid to ask anyone anything. Of course the kinds of questions being asked...not asking might be better.
details
Posted by LibraSid
This poor guy. He asks to sit on some chic's lap and she ridicules him and he can't talk to girls anymore. He comes here for help and asks what he should do and we give it to him worse. He's gonna be afraid to ask anyone anything. Of course the kinds of questions being asked...not asking might be better.


^^^ This is exactly what I was saying.
At some point in life, everybody's game with approaching, hooking & keeping the opposite sex hasn't been grade A! That's apparent when you look at how many "questions" the people laughing at the poster find themselves asking in other threads. It's also apparent when you look at how many people have figured out the right approach, but yet can't keep any of those people in the long term.
I get it. Getting rejected b/c of wanting to sit on woman's lap is completely different, however when you consider the results, they all have 1 thing in common: Their inability to get & keep the attention of the person they're crushing on!
Given that, there's no need to laugh. People have their different ways of showing attraction or trying to establish intimacy or a bond to another person. I've seen men sitting on women's laps before. Not often, but I've seen it. And in the few times I saw that scenario, the women seemed totally fine with it. So not everyone will see that as weird, laughable or a reason to be eternally turned off lol
details
Actually, this is absolutely mock and lol worthy.
Regardless if this was used to pick up the opposite sex, who the hell DOES that? Socially, that's just ridiculous and strange behavior. I'd like to know where the OP got it that asking such things wasn't going to garner a negative response?
If this isn't a troll post, the OP just needs to learn better social graces and act like he/she (?) has been taught to know better. That approach is total creeper behavior and I'd think it should be considered a lesson learned.
Scared to approach women? I would be too if that was how I viewed approaching the opposite gender. You need to change your approach and you'd likely have better luck. You're on the internet. Do some Googling on what NOT to do when approaching a female.
This also includes not stalking, being overbearing and clingy, and not doing strange things to show affection. ...such as jerking off on her leg to prove how much you love her. Given your approach to showing intimacy, I can only imagine that's how you'd show your love. :/
details
Posted by rockyroadicecream
Actually, this is absolutely mock and lol worthy.
Regardless if this was used to pick up the opposite sex, who the hell DOES that? Socially, that's just ridiculous and strange behavior. I'd like to know where the OP got it that asking such things wasn't going to garner a negative response?
If this isn't a troll post, the OP just needs to learn better social graces and act like he/she (?) has been taught to know better. That approach is total creeper behavior and I'd think it should be considered a lesson learned.
Scared to approach women? I would be too if that was how I viewed approaching the opposite gender. You need to change your approach and you'd likely have better luck. You're on the internet. Do some Googling on what NOT to do when approaching a female.
This also includes not stalking, being overbearing and clingy, and not doing strange things to show affection. ...such as jerking off on her leg to prove how much you love her. Given your approach to showing intimacy, I can only imagine that's how you'd show your love. :/


Rocky can I sit in yo lap ^.^?
details
No. I don't want to risk catching anything.

(not directed at you per se, but that would be my response to that question overall, haha.)
details
@Rocky: If we have to blame him for asking a supposedly stupid question, then we'd have to blame everyone who asks a question they can technically get the answer to on Google. Translation ---> EVERYBODY! lol
If I had a penny for everyone asking random questions, I'd have 500 billion dollars
A lot of these posts sound silly to me, but to be fair, I have to remember that people come here to get unbiased opinions from outsiders who may be able to relate. If the outsider can't relate, fine, but keep it pushing. Don't make them feel guilty for simply asking. There are people from all walks of life on this site, which is what makes it so interesting to begin with. To run away those who seem "different" is to end up with a site filled with a bunch of people who agree with each other about everything.
No one can learn anything new that way. Things won't be interesting that way. Things won't be as unbiased that way.
What 1 person considers socially awkward or downright weird, another may consider the opposite. Given that, there really is no such thing as a social norm. "Normal" means different things to different people. I love that. Having a mind of your own & not giving a F that others can't relate is more admirable
details
Posted by SanchoMuyTerrible
I've asked guys to sit in my lap before because I wanted to hold them. None of them wanted to be held though. OP it sounds like we both need to find someone with similar wants and needs.


Sounds like you're made for eachother.
details
Posted by krysrenee7
@Rocky: If we have to blame him for asking a supposedly stupid question, then we'd have to blame everyone who asks a question they can technically get the answer to on Google. Translation ---> EVERYBODY! lol
If I had a penny for everyone asking random questions, I'd have 500 billion dollars
A lot of these posts sound silly to me, but to be fair, I have to remember that people come here to get unbiased opinions from outsiders who may be able to relate. If the outsider can't relate, fine, but keep it pushing. Don't make them feel guilty for simply asking. There are people from all walks of life on this site, which is what makes it so interesting to begin with. To run away those who seem "different" is to end up with a site filled with a bunch of people who agree with each other about everything.
No one can learn anything new that way. Things won't be interesting that way. Things won't be as unbiased that way.
What 1 person considers socially awkward or downright weird, another may consider the opposite. Given that, there really is no such thing as a social norm. "Normal" means different things to different people. I love that. Having a mind of your own & not giving a F that others can't relate is more admirable


I'd be rich as fuck if I had a penny for every lecture you wrote here.
details

Leave Your Feedback

We'd love to hear your thoughts! If you're not logged in, you can still share your feedback below. Your input helps us improve the experience for everyone. To post your own content or join the conversation, please log in or create an account.

Home Astrology Comments Forums Search

©1997-2025 dxpnet.com. All Rights Reserved.
Advertising Contact Terms of Use Privacy Policy