Making the first move

This topic was created in the Relationships forum by sweethearts on Saturday, July 11, 2020 and has 58 replies.
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Has it come to this? Women having to make the first move? Recently because of this corona bs, I’ve had to go on dating sites and the guys don’t ever IMO make the first move ( maybe it’s just me...) never had any problems in RL then talking to a mate the other day, I asked how he and his now ex got together and he said, they went out on a date and she didn’t leave him alone after that. She chased him down and then got pregnant...! Wtf? 😂 he’s been single for a few years again so maybe the ladies aren’t as aggressive.

Is this the way it is these days? It takes away from my womanhood having to make the first move all the time!
Yeah from what I'm seeing men no longer have to do much because women are chasing them so hard. I think there has been a shift to more than just culture these days.
Posted by DonnaLibra

Yeah from what I'm seeing men no longer have to do much because women are chasing them so hard. I think there has been a shift to more than just culture these days.
I honestly thought it was just the younger woman making all the moves, and I’m not interested in the younger guys they are chasing but it looks like it doesn’t have an age! I know technology is making it so much easier and accessible for sexting and cheating (if you’re that way) but the reality is hitting me now on how different the dating world is. My bubbles been burst.. think I’ll be single for the rest of my life lol or I’ll have to join em?!?!??
LOL, no it isn't just the younger women chasing. When my mom died you should have seen the women from her Church rushing over with cakes and roasts for my 70 year old Dad. They were quite aggressive about what they wanted. He is married to one of them now but at one point he had 5 ladies after him.
Yea. Now its your turn to deal with looking weird making the first move. Have fun dealing with a fair share of rejection along with waisted time, and waisted money on dates and gifts just to figure out they were pretty worthless from the start.

Tbh I was never the type of guy to make a move. 100% of my relationships were all with women who make it obvious I could make moves to begin with. Thats another thing. God forbid a man tell a woman she is beautiful and he would like to get to know her better. That's a good way to get accused for being a rapist. Not all woman are like that, but a handful. That handful though is enough to make most men say "Yea no thanks." Then she turns around and makes a fans only. The second you learn most women hate most women was the first red flag imo.

Posted by Gobby

Oh, do fuck off! You wanted equality, you got it.

Cry me a frigging river of crocodile tears...
I guess no ones chasing you gobby? 😂
Posted by Soul

Yea. Now its your turn to deal with looking weird making the first move. Have fun dealing with a fair share of rejection along with waisted time, and waisted money on dates and gifts just to figure out they were pretty worthless from the start.

Tbh I was never the type of guy to make a move. 100% of my relationships were all with women who make it obvious I could make moves to begin with. Thats another thing. God forbid a man tell a woman she is beautiful and he would like to get to know her better. That's a good way to get accused for being a rapist. Not all woman are like that, but a handful. That handful though is enough to make most men say "Yea no thanks." Then she turns around and makes a fans only. The second you learn most women hate most women was the first red flag imo.
Guess I’ll just join them then! Thinking about it, it’s better that way anywho. At least it’ll be my selection and I won’t have to deal with trying to let someone down without offending. I always feel bad saying not interested and I can handle rejection, it only stings for a bit.
Posted by Gobby
Posted by sweethearts
Posted by Gobby

Oh, do fuck off! You wanted equality, you got it.

Cry me a frigging river of crocodile tears...


I guess no ones chasing you gobby? 😂


That's the best you've got?

Keep digging yourself a hole...
click to expand
Keyboard warriors aren’t my Fortay. Keep trying though, there’s plenty around here that’ll bite smile
Posted by sweethearts

Has it come to this? Women having to make the first move? Recently because of this corona bs, I’ve had to go on dating sites and the guys don’t ever IMO make the first move ( maybe it’s just me...) never had any problems in RL then talking to a mate the other day, I asked how he and his now ex got together and he said, they went out on a date and she didn’t leave him alone after that. She chased him down and then got pregnant...! Wtf? 😂 he’s been single for a few years again so maybe the ladies aren’t as aggressive.

Is this the way it is these days? It takes away from my womanhood having to make the first move all the time!


Also, how right you are. It takes away from your womanhood and also, their manhood. This is a not-so-new phase in the whole "metrosexual movement" with men becoming less aggressive(to the healthy extent) and more feminized. Look at Hollywood; there are no John Waynes out there for young boys to aspire towards. Women's rights have gone a little too far, where men are scared to step too far in any way that might be a sounding alarm for a woman to make potential charges of harrassment for political gain and/or attention (look at some of the "#metoo" movement cases. More feminized leading men in Hollywood (as well as more feminized predicaments in story lines, and/or feminized lines given to them) creates a trickle-down effect to the streets when it comes to idols to emulate. On the fashion front, unisex clothes, accessory trends and hair style s amplify this. On the relationship advice front, women are poised to bring more "added value" to the table within their romantic partnerships, by having a successful career as well as all sorts of contacts to hurdle life's obstacles and be more of an "asset" to their man (with the traditional role of being a nurturer fading further, further away), and make it a "us against the world" type of perspective, "bring everything to the relationship that you can, babe." More and more Hollywood scripts portray family men as bumbling idiots that can't do anything right, and the wife or girlfriend as the one that hedges around the guy, pulls the picture together and saves the day behind his back just in time to make it home and sooth his ego (complete role reversal). The gay movement adds a certain element to the picture also. More and more men are being conditioned to think that it is "they" that need to be won over, and that it's the woman needs to work hard to attain them. **this trend is poison to the natural thinking and suitable evolvement of the sexes.** Men are much more gigilo-esque these days, concentrating more and more on self-grooming, form-fitting luxury clothing and "playing the field" well into their early forties instead of applying effort into learning a blue-collared trade, concentrating on family life and contributing positively to their community through clubs and lodges with fellow men. This extreme role reversal will have long term affects. Subconsciously, men have a need to hunt and accomplish, and women have a need to nurture. Traditional roles help men find the most fertile carrier for their seed and women spot the most capable male to sire their seed that they can find. The role reversal no doubt causes disorientation on this very subconscious level, and just contributes to an already frustrating and confusing state of relations between not just the sexes, but dealing with people in general these days. Men drop all forms if civiltries when dealing with women in general in public, while "modern women" are trained to now perceive old-school civiltries as demeaning and offensive. And it's going to get worse. **They're doing this intentionally to get us fed up and disappointed when dealing with eachother, and prep us to only trust robots. That way, they can program the robots to coherce us to trust the gov*ern*ment on every level and s*p*y on us through our "significant other." We're being gradually divided directly under our noses with the latest artificial intelligence programed in our upgraded iphones, Alexas, and even smart TV's. AI news predicts that in 20 years, robotic human clones and technology embedded within them will become so close to natural and utterly flawless, that they will be able to fully comprehend and mimmick human feelings to the point that they can reciprocate and we will fall in love with robots.
Not all men are lazy and wait for women to come to them. Some were taught by their fathers or father figures the ways of manhood and courtship. Some didn’t have any father figures and but still figured it out. The others, well, the laziness stuck with them. The land of lazy is too comfortable to get out of.

Lazy courtship, Usually that is a sign that more laziness exists in their world. Lazy at work. Lazy cleaners of their homes. Lazy hygiene. Lazy appearance.

It’s all related.

You can spot the lazy ones a mile away
Posted by ElvisStalinWoods
Posted by DMV

Not all men are lazy and wait for women to come to them. Some were taught by their fathers or father figures the ways of manhood and courtship. Some didn’t have any father figures and but still figured it out. The others, well, the laziness stuck with them. The land of lazy is too comfortable to get out of.

Lazy courtship, Usually that is a sign that more laziness exists in their world. Lazy at work. Lazy cleaners of their homes. Lazy hygiene. Lazy appearance.

It’s all related.

You can’t spot the lazy ones a mile away


I think there's a difference between lazy and done with bullshit.
click to expand
Correct.

Men who are done with the bullshit should be left to their own devices, left to their own healing.

Just as with bitter women, bitter men are poisonous to themselves and others.
Posted by DMV

Not all men are lazy and wait for women to come to them. Some were taught by their fathers or father figures the ways of manhood and courtship. Some didn’t have any father figures and but still figured it out. The others, well, the laziness stuck with them. The land of lazy is too comfortable to get out of.

Lazy courtship, Usually that is a sign that more laziness exists in their world. Lazy at work. Lazy cleaners of their homes. Lazy hygiene. Lazy appearance.

It’s all related.

You can spot the lazy ones a mile away
Worst of all, lazy fuck.
the last generation of men who used to make the first move is being metoo'ed to death now.
Posted by hydorah

the last generation of men who used to make the first move is being metoo'ed to death now.
Or maybe they finally learn to read body language and other common cues!
Posted by Undine
Posted by hydorah

the last generation of men who used to make the first move is being metoo'ed to death now.


Or maybe they finally learn to read body language and other common cues!
click to expand


there's nothing to read
It doesn't matter who makes the first move. What matters is what happens after someone has made that first move.

And no, I don't believe women should chase men. If men are interested or available, their higher level of testosterone should make them go after what they want. Chase only if you want to end up with a pussey!
Posted by hydorah
Posted by Undine
Posted by hydorah

the last generation of men who used to make the first move is being metoo'ed to death now.


Or maybe they finally learn to read body language and other common cues!


there's nothing to read
click to expand
Buy yourself a book...
User Submitted Image
You have to let them? I don’t have that problem. Lol
Posted by sweethearts

Has it come to this? Women having to make the first move? Recently because of this corona bs, I’ve had to go on dating sites and the guys don’t ever IMO make the first move ( maybe it’s just me...) never had any problems in RL then talking to a mate the other day, I asked how he and his now ex got together and he said, they went out on a date and she didn’t leave him alone after that. She chased him down and then got pregnant...! Wtf? 😂 he’s been single for a few years again so maybe the ladies aren’t as aggressive.

Is this the way it is these days? It takes away from my womanhood having to make the first move all the time!


Equal is Equal.

Women fought for an equal voice... Well, surprise! It's not a man's job to make the first move, but rather the first moves should be distributed evenly, lol.

Perhaps this is destiny's way of letting you know that it is time that you to catch up on all of the first moves you never had to make. Haha 😜

Post Edit - oh yeah whenever you find a man & you're living together... If you hear a strange noise in the middle of the night 50% of those are yours to check also. Hahaha. Equality and all. 🤣
Posted by TheApparition
Posted by sweethearts

Has it come to this? Women having to make the first move? Recently because of this corona bs, I’ve had to go on dating sites and the guys don’t ever IMO make the first move ( maybe it’s just me...) never had any problems in RL then talking to a mate the other day, I asked how he and his now ex got together and he said, they went out on a date and she didn’t leave him alone after that. She chased him down and then got pregnant...! Wtf? 😂 he’s been single for a few years again so maybe the ladies aren’t as aggressive.

Is this the way it is these days? It takes away from my womanhood having to make the first move all the time!


Equal is Equal.

Women fought for an equal voice... Well, surprise! It's not a man's job to make the first move, but rather the first moves should be distributed evenly, lol.

Perhaps this is destiny's way of letting you know that it is time that you to catch up on all of the first moves you never had to make. Haha 😜Post Edit - oh yeah whenever you find a man & you're living together... If you hear a strange noise in the middle of the night 50% of those are yours to check also. Hahaha. Equality and all. 🤣
click to expand
lol, I’ve always been the one to get up and check out the noises.

And I guess it’s only one more job that I have to take away from a man... kinda the reason why I’ve been single so long. If it wasn’t for sex and cuddles I wouldn’t want one...
Posted by sweethearts
Posted by TheApparition
Posted by sweethearts

Has it come to this? Women having to make the first move? Recently because of this corona bs, I’ve had to go on dating sites and the guys don’t ever IMO make the first move ( maybe it’s just me...) never had any problems in RL then talking to a mate the other day, I asked how he and his now ex got together and he said, they went out on a date and she didn’t leave him alone after that. She chased him down and then got pregnant...! Wtf? 😂 he’s been single for a few years again so maybe the ladies aren’t as aggressive.

Is this the way it is these days? It takes away from my womanhood having to make the first move all the time!


Equal is Equal.

Women fought for an equal voice... Well, surprise! It's not a man's job to make the first move, but rather the first moves should be distributed evenly, lol.

Perhaps this is destiny's way of letting you know that it is time that you to catch up on all of the first moves you never had to make. Haha 😜Post Edit - oh yeah whenever you find a man & you're living together... If you hear a strange noise in the middle of the night 50% of those are yours to check also. Hahaha. Equality and all. 🤣


lol, I’ve always been the one to get up and check out the noises.

And I guess it’s only one more job that I have to take away from a man... kinda the reason why I’ve been single so long. If it wasn’t for sex and cuddles I wouldn’t want one...
click to expand


I hope you did catch the fact that I was being silly in my response; haha.

In truth I don't think it comes down to should, shouldn't, could, couldn't or whatever. I think it's a matter of what is customary and/or commonplace. The truth is, yes... Traditionally & customarily (generally speaking and obviously not in every society or culture) it has been a man's place to make the first move; however, doing so is kind of risky anymore.

It's so easy to offend people anymore, or to say something and to have it be received in a way you didn't intend it which could quite easily end up with you having a harassment suit (or worse) of some kind. Even if you were found innocent your reputation, livelihood, or well-being could have been harmed irreparably in the process somehow.

Obviously that is just one very extreme, but it is something that is happening more and more.

With that said it's just... I don't want to say easier... ummm... more convenient all around (?) I suppose... if a woman were to approach a man instead of the other way around. A woman will be very hard to press to say something that will flat-out insult a man outright, so much so, that a woman wouldn't (generally speaking) have to fear any kind of push back from doing so.

I think that is perhaps why it is occurring more regularly; however, my initial response was more humorous so I went with that instead. 😂

Post Edit - I had made a "Complementing a Woman" post several months ago if ya' want to check out some of the responses there. They're moderately applicable to your topic as well. - https://www.dxpnet.com/opinion/the-man-cave/complementing-a-woman-13689709/
Posted by BETYOURLIFEONIT



Watch the last 5 minutes of this. Please.
It's blocked...

User Submitted Image
Posted by BETYOURLIFEONIT
Posted by TheApparition
Posted by BETYOURLIFEONIT



Watch the last 5 minutes of this. Please.


It's blocked...

User Submitted Image


Click on the white text the nasty show.
click to expand


I've already seen it and I'm watching it again as we speak, lol.

I knew it would open in YouTube. I just was letting you know in case you wanted to find an alternate to post for the people who aren't going to want to be bothered doing all of that. Haha

P.s. I can't hear that "_____ powers activate" line without thinking of the 80s Voltron cartoon... Just with a rather different visual; haha
Posted by ElvisStalinWoods
Posted by Undine

It doesn't matter who makes the first move. What matters is what happens after someone has made that first move.

And no, I don't believe women should chase men. If men are interested or available, their higher level of testosterone should make them go after what they want. Chase only if you want to end up with a pussey!


There are loads of women that will act like they're not interested and then wonder why the guy has stopped giving chase.

No means no, correct?

If her act after the man's initial approach signals lack of interest, then he should cease and desist. No?

Then there are the men who consistently pursue a woman who is genuinely not interested and then it's a rant about how all men are animals/pigs/yaddayadda.



Can't have it both ways.

I don't mind approaching on a sexual basis; if it's a no, I'm onto the next one. But, wading the double-standard stated above, for anything more serious, is not worth the time. I'm not looking to partner up with a woman who's stuck in high school mode. I won't waste my time approaching and then have to determine if her decline was legit or a first step in some dumbass back and forth.
click to expand


Life's too dangerous for "Cat and Mouse" hahaha
Posted by ElvisStalinWoods
Posted by TheApparition
Posted by ElvisStalinWoods
Posted by Undine

It doesn't matter who makes the first move. What matters is what happens after someone has made that first move.

And no, I don't believe women should chase men. If men are interested or available, their higher level of testosterone should make them go after what they want. Chase only if you want to end up with a pussey!


There are loads of women that will act like they're not interested and then wonder why the guy has stopped giving chase.

No means no, correct?

If her act after the man's initial approach signals lack of interest, then he should cease and desist. No?

Then there are the men who consistently pursue a woman who is genuinely not interested and then it's a rant about how all men are animals/pigs/yaddayadda.



Can't have it both ways.

I don't mind approaching on a sexual basis; if it's a no, I'm onto the next one. But, wading the double-standard stated above, for anything more serious, is not worth the time. I'm not looking to partner up with a woman who's stuck in high school mode. I won't waste my time approaching and then have to determine if her decline was legit or a first step in some dumbass back and forth.




Life's too dangerous for "Cat and Mouse" hahaha


😂

I didn't know this existed. You just bought me a way to kill time on my graveyard shift. 👌👌
click to expand


Haircut, Internet Date, Flea Market, and... Dog Walker are the only "bad" episodes out of the 2 seasons (imo) The rest are funny as hell and I would definitely recommend watching them to kill some time. Haha.
Posted by ElvisStalinWoods
Posted by Undine

It doesn't matter who makes the first move. What matters is what happens after someone has made that first move.

And no, I don't believe women should chase men. If men are interested or available, their higher level of testosterone should make them go after what they want. Chase only if you want to end up with a pussey!


There are loads of women that will act like they're not interested and then wonder why the guy has stopped giving chase.

No means no, correct?

If her act after the man's initial approach signals lack of interest, then he should cease and desist. No?

Then there are the men who consistently pursue a woman who is genuinely not interested and then it's a rant about how all men are animals/pigs/yaddayadda.



Can't have it both ways.

I don't mind approaching on a sexual basis; if it's a no, I'm onto the next one. But, wading the double-standard stated above, for anything more serious, is not worth the time. I'm not looking to partner up with a woman who's stuck in high school mode. I won't waste my time approaching and then have to determine if her decline was legit or a first step in some dumbass back and forth.
click to expand
"No means no, correct?"

"No" is often not a personal rejection, but a rejection of the way you approach someone. Going for an above average attractive, 20 something, is not going to work most of the time. She gets hit on so much, that saying "no" to a stranger is a defense mechanism, that she needs to overcome first. Have some patience. Try again another time, after changing tactics. Establishing a connection (eye contact, smile) and focusing on her for many minutes before approaching may help, at least to see if she enjoys your attention. Let her "choose" you, before you approach her.

Posted by Undine
Posted by ElvisStalinWoods
Posted by Undine

It doesn't matter who makes the first move. What matters is what happens after someone has made that first move.

And no, I don't believe women should chase men. If men are interested or available, their higher level of testosterone should make them go after what they want. Chase only if you want to end up with a pussey!


There are loads of women that will act like they're not interested and then wonder why the guy has stopped giving chase.

No means no, correct?

If her act after the man's initial approach signals lack of interest, then he should cease and desist. No?

Then there are the men who consistently pursue a woman who is genuinely not interested and then it's a rant about how all men are animals/pigs/yaddayadda.



Can't have it both ways.

I don't mind approaching on a sexual basis; if it's a no, I'm onto the next one. But, wading the double-standard stated above, for anything more serious, is not worth the time. I'm not looking to partner up with a woman who's stuck in high school mode. I won't waste my time approaching and then have to determine if her decline was legit or a first step in some dumbass back and forth.


"No means no, correct?"

"No" is often not a personal rejection, but a rejection of the way you approach someone. Going for an above average attractive, 20 something, is not going to work most of the time. She gets hit on so much, that saying "no" to a stranger is a defense mechanism, that she needs to overcome first. Have some patience. Try again another time, after changing tactics. Establishing a connection (eye contact, smile) and focusing on her for many minutes before approaching may help, at least to see if she enjoys your attention. Let her "choose" you, before you approach her.
click to expand
Yeah @ElvisStalinWoods "Try again another time, after changing tactics. Establishing a connection (eye contact, smile) and focusing on her for many minutes before approaching may help, at least to see if she enjoys your attention. Let her "choose" you, before you approach her."

Like these guys...

User Submitted Image

(Norman Bates)



User Submitted Image

(Zac Efron portraying Ted Bundy)



You wouldn't want them to think you're a creeper anyting. 🤭
i'm old school. just don't play games. if you like a guy, indicate that you like him and would say yes if he were to pursue you.

men don't want to be rejected either. they want to know that the woman is going to be receptive to him.

women who think men should "just know" how they are feeling are going to not get as many offers as they perhaps would like. men don't "just know" and for some of them, they will be thinking they don't have a chance with the women they find attractive.

is it chasing to show your interest? it doesn't have to be much. you don't have to stalk him and his friends and family or throw yourself on the hood of his car. a simple "you're cute." said in a friendly way is enough, isn't it?
Posted by Undine

It doesn't matter who makes the first move. What matters is what happens after someone has made that first move.

And no, I don't believe women should chase men. If men are interested or available, their higher level of testosterone should make them go after what they want. Chase only if you want to end up with a pussey!


Well, if it doesn't matter who makes the 1st move as you say then why shouldn't women do it too? In my 74 years of life experience women make lots of first moves anyway, they just can't help it and we like it.

And be careful what you wish for, lady. Testosterone can make a man chase anything for the moment, even when he doesn't like or care for you at all. That's our magic power. smile
LOL at the Caps, refusing to step into the traditional male stereotype. Do you think you are Aquas, or somethin'....? Big Grin

This is how it began with my Caps:

Cap no. 1 (we were both 19 yrs). I was standing in the train's corridor, near a window, enjoying the wind in my hair. I heard arguing in a compartment nearby. The train supervisor was demanding that "the corn should go sit in the second class asap!". The Cap replied, politely: --We are not "the corn". We are first year medical students, helping the country collect the corn. If we want to travel first class (even without a ticket), we travel first class!-- He then invited me and others to join him in the compartment. We did, since we needed to make a point. The train supervisor left us alone.

I was transfixed by him. We got off the train, and I made sure to keep the Cap in my visual distance, all day long. Since I didn't want it to be too obvious, I kept asking my BFF every 5 min or so, if the Cap was looking at me when I didn't. On the way back, we were "loaded" onto a truck, and Cap and his friend decided to help the girls climb into it, which also involved lifting their butts. I waited to be the last climbing in, to closely observe his actions, lol. We arrived into town and took the same tram home. In the tram, he suddenly asked me to be his girlfriend! I was so shocked, that I gasped.... can't even remember if I said "yes" or "no", just that I was gobsmacked and scared. I must have said "yes" sometime though, since we started dating, after the two weeks of "corn" were over.

Cap no. 2 (late 2012). I've seen him on a dating site and initiated contact.

Cap no. 3 (late 2019). I "knew" him from a social forum. Unknown to him, I was coming to his town, when he suddenly posted that he was hungry. I spontaneously replied by inviting him for lunch, half jokingly. I couldn't find the meeting point though, so I was walking down the street, talking to him on the phone and reading the name of the shops I was passing by, to give him a clue to where I was. Suddenly, someone walking in the opposite direction grabbed my arm, turned me 180º and kept walking next to me, in silence! He was far more attractive than I thought, and looked nothing like I expected. I could barely articulate a word for the next 15 min or so. We ended up in a pub, and after a few pints, I asked permission to kiss him on his lips, just before I left smile

So yes, I did initiate each time (sorry, Aries Mars here), but I never had to chase them.
Posted by TheSag
Posted by Undine

It doesn't matter who makes the first move. What matters is what happens after someone has made that first move.

And no, I don't believe women should chase men. If men are interested or available, their higher level of testosterone should make them go after what they want. Chase only if you want to end up with a pussey!


Well, if it doesn't matter who makes the 1st move as you say then why shouldn't women do it too? In my 74 years of life experience women make lots of first moves anyway, they just can't help it and we like it.

And be careful what you wish for, lady. Testosterone can make a man chase anything for the moment, even when he doesn't like or care for you at all. That's our magic power. smile
click to expand
So you agree with me, that women could and should initiate as well (I said it doesn't matter who does it). That women should not chase men, doesn't imply that men should chase women! Men are just biologically prone to do that, for better or worse. I don't believe they should chase! I am biologically prone (as a woman and introvert) to appear like a deer in the headlights if someone makes a move on me, and unable to speak, if I'm strongly attracted.
Posted by Undine
Posted by TheSag
Posted by Undine

It doesn't matter who makes the first move. What matters is what happens after someone has made that first move.

And no, I don't believe women should chase men. If men are interested or available, their higher level of testosterone should make them go after what they want. Chase only if you want to end up with a pussey!


Well, if it doesn't matter who makes the 1st move as you say then why shouldn't women do it too? In my 74 years of life experience women make lots of first moves anyway, they just can't help it and we like it.

And be careful what you wish for, lady. Testosterone can make a man chase anything for the moment, even when he doesn't like or care for you at all. That's our magic power. smile


So you agree with me, that women could and should initiate as well (I said it doesn't matter who does it). That women should not chase men, doesn't imply that men should chase women! Men are just biologically prone to do that, for better or worse. I don't believe they should chase! I am biologically prone (as a woman and introvert) to appear like a deer in the headlights if someone makes a move on me, and unable to speak, if I'm strongly attracted.
click to expand
You are still kind of condradicting yourself, since you said chase only if you want to end up with a pussy.
Posted by TheSag
Posted by Undine
Posted by TheSag
Posted by Undine

It doesn't matter who makes the first move. What matters is what happens after someone has made that first move.

And no, I don't believe women should chase men. If men are interested or available, their higher level of testosterone should make them go after what they want. Chase only if you want to end up with a pussey!


Well, if it doesn't matter who makes the 1st move as you say then why shouldn't women do it too? In my 74 years of life experience women make lots of first moves anyway, they just can't help it and we like it.

And be careful what you wish for, lady. Testosterone can make a man chase anything for the moment, even when he doesn't like or care for you at all. That's our magic power. smile


So you agree with me, that women could and should initiate as well (I said it doesn't matter who does it). That women should not chase men, doesn't imply that men should chase women! Men are just biologically prone to do that, for better or worse. I don't believe they should chase! I am biologically prone (as a woman and introvert) to appear like a deer in the headlights if someone makes a move on me, and unable to speak, if I'm strongly attracted.


You are still kind of condradicting yourself, since you said chase only if you want to end up with a pussy.
click to expand


That was sarcastic meant. Why would a hetero female want to end up with another pussy?

A pussy is the default genitalia formed in the absence of testosterone.
Posted by Undine
Posted by TheSag
Posted by Undine
Posted by TheSag
Posted by Undine

It doesn't matter who makes the first move. What matters is what happens after someone has made that first move.

And no, I don't believe women should chase men. If men are interested or available, their higher level of testosterone should make them go after what they want. Chase only if you want to end up with a pussey!


Well, if it doesn't matter who makes the 1st move as you say then why shouldn't women do it too? In my 74 years of life experience women make lots of first moves anyway, they just can't help it and we like it.

And be careful what you wish for, lady. Testosterone can make a man chase anything for the moment, even when he doesn't like or care for you at all. That's our magic power. smile


So you agree with me, that women could and should initiate as well (I said it doesn't matter who does it). That women should not chase men, doesn't imply that men should chase women! Men are just biologically prone to do that, for better or worse. I don't believe they should chase! I am biologically prone (as a woman and introvert) to appear like a deer in the headlights if someone makes a move on me, and unable to speak, if I'm strongly attracted.


You are still kind of condradicting yourself, since you said chase only if you want to end up with a pussy.


That was sarcastic meant. Why would a hetero female want to end up with another pussy?
click to expand
It seemed like you were implying the man was the pussy if he didn't chase ^^
Posted by TheSag
Posted by Undine
Posted by TheSag
Posted by Undine
Posted by TheSag
Posted by Undine

It doesn't matter who makes the first move. What matters is what happens after someone has made that first move.

And no, I don't believe women should chase men. If men are interested or available, their higher level of testosterone should make them go after what they want. Chase only if you want to end up with a pussey!


Well, if it doesn't matter who makes the 1st move as you say then why shouldn't women do it too? In my 74 years of life experience women make lots of first moves anyway, they just can't help it and we like it.

And be careful what you wish for, lady. Testosterone can make a man chase anything for the moment, even when he doesn't like or care for you at all. That's our magic power. smile


So you agree with me, that women could and should initiate as well (I said it doesn't matter who does it). That women should not chase men, doesn't imply that men should chase women! Men are just biologically prone to do that, for better or worse. I don't believe they should chase! I am biologically prone (as a woman and introvert) to appear like a deer in the headlights if someone makes a move on me, and unable to speak, if I'm strongly attracted.


You are still kind of condradicting yourself, since you said chase only if you want to end up with a pussy.


That was sarcastic meant. Why would a hetero female want to end up with another pussy?


It seemed like you were implying the man was the pussy if he didn't chase ^^
click to expand


Maybe we have different definitions for "pussy" and "chasing".

A pussy is the default genitalia formed in the absence of testosterone. Testosterone is the hormone of aggression, competitiveness, dominance, and self esteem, among other roles.

Chasing is persistently going after someone who doesn't want to be caught.

What do you think about a man who doesn't want some particular woman's advances, but eventually gives in, in the face of her superior will? I would say he's got less balls than her!
Posted by Undine
Posted by TheSag
Posted by Undine
Posted by TheSag
Posted by Undine
Posted by TheSag
Posted by Undine

It doesn't matter who makes the first move. What matters is what happens after someone has made that first move.

And no, I don't believe women should chase men. If men are interested or available, their higher level of testosterone should make them go after what they want. Chase only if you want to end up with a pussey!


Well, if it doesn't matter who makes the 1st move as you say then why shouldn't women do it too? In my 74 years of life experience women make lots of first moves anyway, they just can't help it and we like it.

And be careful what you wish for, lady. Testosterone can make a man chase anything for the moment, even when he doesn't like or care for you at all. That's our magic power. smile


So you agree with me, that women could and should initiate as well (I said it doesn't matter who does it). That women should not chase men, doesn't imply that men should chase women! Men are just biologically prone to do that, for better or worse. I don't believe they should chase! I am biologically prone (as a woman and introvert) to appear like a deer in the headlights if someone makes a move on me, and unable to speak, if I'm strongly attracted.


You are still kind of condradicting yourself, since you said chase only if you want to end up with a pussy.


That was sarcastic meant. Why would a hetero female want to end up with another pussy?


It seemed like you were implying the man was the pussy if he didn't chase ^^


Maybe we have different definitions for "pussy" and "chasing".

A pussy is the default genitalia formed in the absence of testosterone. Testosterone is the hormone of aggression, competitiveness, dominance, and self esteem, among other roles.

Chasing is persistently going after someone who doesn't want to be caught.

What do you think about a man who doesn't want some particular woman's advances, but eventually gives in, in the face of her superior will? I would say he's got less balls than her!
click to expand
By that definition chasing is a female trait since men go from one woman to the next because that is what he is supposed to do biologically while the woman tries to catch him. A man doesn't want to be caught. So who chases whom here?

Posted by TheSag
Posted by Undine
Posted by TheSag
Posted by Undine
Posted by TheSag
Posted by Undine
Posted by TheSag
Posted by Undine

It doesn't matter who makes the first move. What matters is what happens after someone has made that first move.

And no, I don't believe women should chase men. If men are interested or available, their higher level of testosterone should make them go after what they want. Chase only if you want to end up with a pussey!


Well, if it doesn't matter who makes the 1st move as you say then why shouldn't women do it too? In my 74 years of life experience women make lots of first moves anyway, they just can't help it and we like it.

And be careful what you wish for, lady. Testosterone can make a man chase anything for the moment, even when he doesn't like or care for you at all. That's our magic power. smile


So you agree with me, that women could and should initiate as well (I said it doesn't matter who does it). That women should not chase men, doesn't imply that men should chase women! Men are just biologically prone to do that, for better or worse. I don't believe they should chase! I am biologically prone (as a woman and introvert) to appear like a deer in the headlights if someone makes a move on me, and unable to speak, if I'm strongly attracted.


You are still kind of condradicting yourself, since you said chase only if you want to end up with a pussy.


That was sarcastic meant. Why would a hetero female want to end up with another pussy?


It seemed like you were implying the man was the pussy if he didn't chase ^^


Maybe we have different definitions for "pussy" and "chasing".

A pussy is the default genitalia formed in the absence of testosterone. Testosterone is the hormone of aggression, competitiveness, dominance, and self esteem, among other roles.

Chasing is persistently going after someone who doesn't want to be caught.

What do you think about a man who doesn't want some particular woman's advances, but eventually gives in, in the face of her superior will? I would say he's got less balls than her!


By that definition chasing is a female trait since men go from one woman to the next because that is what he is supposed to do biologically while the woman tries to catch him. A man doesn't want to be caught. So who chases whom here?
click to expand
"A woman tries to catch him".....?!

You mean...she tries to catch him cheating on her? Or tries to persuade him to stay with her, after they formed a couple? Well, these are different stories, which don't normally involve chasing after Big Grin
Posted by Undine
Posted by TheSag
Posted by Undine
Posted by TheSag
Posted by Undine
Posted by TheSag
Posted by Undine
Posted by TheSag
Posted by Undine

It doesn't matter who makes the first move. What matters is what happens after someone has made that first move.

And no, I don't believe women should chase men. If men are interested or available, their higher level of testosterone should make them go after what they want. Chase only if you want to end up with a pussey!


Well, if it doesn't matter who makes the 1st move as you say then why shouldn't women do it too? In my 74 years of life experience women make lots of first moves anyway, they just can't help it and we like it.

And be careful what you wish for, lady. Testosterone can make a man chase anything for the moment, even when he doesn't like or care for you at all. That's our magic power. smile


So you agree with me, that women could and should initiate as well (I said it doesn't matter who does it). That women should not chase men, doesn't imply that men should chase women! Men are just biologically prone to do that, for better or worse. I don't believe they should chase! I am biologically prone (as a woman and introvert) to appear like a deer in the headlights if someone makes a move on me, and unable to speak, if I'm strongly attracted.


You are still kind of condradicting yourself, since you said chase only if you want to end up with a pussy.


That was sarcastic meant. Why would a hetero female want to end up with another pussy?


It seemed like you were implying the man was the pussy if he didn't chase ^^


Maybe we have different definitions for "pussy" and "chasing".

A pussy is the default genitalia formed in the absence of testosterone. Testosterone is the hormone of aggression, competitiveness, dominance, and self esteem, among other roles.

Chasing is persistently going after someone who doesn't want to be caught.

What do you think about a man who doesn't want some particular woman's advances, but eventually gives in, in the face of her superior will? I would say he's got less balls than her!


By that definition chasing is a female trait since men go from one woman to the next because that is what he is supposed to do biologically while the woman tries to catch him. A man doesn't want to be caught. So who chases whom here?


"A woman tries to catch him".....?!

You mean...she tries to catch him cheating on her? Or tries to persuade him to stay with her, after they formed a couple? Well, these are different stories, which don't normally involve chasing after Big Grin
click to expand


🤭
I personally love it when the men chase (my Leo placements would not have it any other way). Ladies keep making your men chase even after marriage cause it’s when they stop having incentive chasing after you that they might start chasing after that secretary 😂 Yes elder women have gave me that unsolicited advice.
Posted by ElvisStalinWoods
Posted by TheApparition
Posted by Undine
Posted by ElvisStalinWoods
Posted by Undine

It doesn't matter who makes the first move. What matters is what happens after someone has made that first move.

And no, I don't believe women should chase men. If men are interested or available, their higher level of testosterone should make them go after what they want. Chase only if you want to end up with a pussey!


There are loads of women that will act like they're not interested and then wonder why the guy has stopped giving chase.

No means no, correct?

If her act after the man's initial approach signals lack of interest, then he should cease and desist. No?

Then there are the men who consistently pursue a woman who is genuinely not interested and then it's a rant about how all men are animals/pigs/yaddayadda.



Can't have it both ways.

I don't mind approaching on a sexual basis; if it's a no, I'm onto the next one. But, wading the double-standard stated above, for anything more serious, is not worth the time. I'm not looking to partner up with a woman who's stuck in high school mode. I won't waste my time approaching and then have to determine if her decline was legit or a first step in some dumbass back and forth.


"No means no, correct?"

"No" is often not a personal rejection, but a rejection of the way you approach someone. Going for an above average attractive, 20 something, is not going to work most of the time. She gets hit on so much, that saying "no" to a stranger is a defense mechanism, that she needs to overcome first. Have some patience. Try again another time, after changing tactics. Establishing a connection (eye contact, smile) and focusing on her for many minutes before approaching may help, at least to see if she enjoys your attention. Let her "choose" you, before you approach her.


Yeah @ElvisStalinWoods "Try again another time, after changing tactics. Establishing a connection (eye contact, smile) and focusing on her for many minutes before approaching may help, at least to see if she enjoys your attention. Let her "choose" you, before you approach her."

Like these guys...

User Submitted Image

(Norman Bates)


User Submitted Image

(Zac Efron portraying Ted Bundy)



You wouldn't want them to think you're a creeper anyting. 🤭


Lmao 😂, well put.

Just play a one man masquerade until she takes the bait. Then some people wonder how they wind up tied up with "Toxic" characters
click to expand
No, it's just men who wonder why they get rejected Big Grin

Btw, nobody said to play anything. Be yourself...I was just suggesting which variante of yourself would be less likely to get the boot when accosting a female.
Soooooooo

did I read that last page correctly?

"no" doesn't mean no anymore?

User Submitted Image
Posted by ElvisStalinWoods
Posted by Undine
Posted by ElvisStalinWoods
Posted by TheApparition
Posted by Undine
Posted by ElvisStalinWoods
Posted by Undine

It doesn't matter who makes the first move. What matters is what happens after someone has made that first move.

And no, I don't believe women should chase men. If men are interested or available, their higher level of testosterone should make them go after what they want. Chase only if you want to end up with a pussey!


There are loads of women that will act like they're not interested and then wonder why the guy has stopped giving chase.

No means no, correct?

If her act after the man's initial approach signals lack of interest, then he should cease and desist. No?

Then there are the men who consistently pursue a woman who is genuinely not interested and then it's a rant about how all men are animals/pigs/yaddayadda.



Can't have it both ways.

I don't mind approaching on a sexual basis; if it's a no, I'm onto the next one. But, wading the double-standard stated above, for anything more serious, is not worth the time. I'm not looking to partner up with a woman who's stuck in high school mode. I won't waste my time approaching and then have to determine if her decline was legit or a first step in some dumbass back and forth.


"No means no, correct?"

"No" is often not a personal rejection, but a rejection of the way you approach someone. Going for an above average attractive, 20 something, is not going to work most of the time. She gets hit on so much, that saying "no" to a stranger is a defense mechanism, that she needs to overcome first. Have some patience. Try again another time, after changing tactics. Establishing a connection (eye contact, smile) and focusing on her for many minutes before approaching may help, at least to see if she enjoys your attention. Let her "choose" you, before you approach her.


Yeah @ElvisStalinWoods "Try again another time, after changing tactics. Establishing a connection (eye contact, smile) and focusing on her for many minutes before approaching may help, at least to see if she enjoys your attention. Let her "choose" you, before you approach her."

Like these guys...

User Submitted Image

(Norman Bates)


User Submitted Image

(Zac Efron portraying Ted Bundy)



You wouldn't want them to think you're a creeper anyting. 🤭


Lmao 😂, well put.

Just play a one man masquerade until she takes the bait. Then some people wonder how they wind up tied up with "Toxic" characters


No, it's just men who wonder why they get rejected Big Grin

Btw, nobody said to play anything. Be yourself...I was just suggesting which variante of yourself would be less likely to get the boot when accosting a female.


Sure, playing variants for a lay ain't so bad, but again, for anything more solid, that's an absolutely toxic way of operating. If you're looking to draw a long term partner, applying different facades to partner up is groundwork for a shitty relation.
click to expand
Facade, my ass! Look at her, repeatedly, till you feel like smiling. Or till you meet her eyes, and she smiles at you.

If you don't feel like looking at her or smiling, even nervously or internally, and you don't even feel like returning her smile, then......Dude, why are approaching her for....?

Posted by ElvisStalinWoods
Posted by Undine
Posted by ElvisStalinWoods
Posted by Undine
Posted by ElvisStalinWoods
Posted by TheApparition
Posted by Undine
Posted by ElvisStalinWoods
Posted by Undine

It doesn't matter who makes the first move. What matters is what happens after someone has made that first move.

And no, I don't believe women should chase men. If men are interested or available, their higher level of testosterone should make them go after what they want. Chase only if you want to end up with a pussey!


There are loads of women that will act like they're not interested and then wonder why the guy has stopped giving chase.

No means no, correct?

If her act after the man's initial approach signals lack of interest, then he should cease and desist. No?

Then there are the men who consistently pursue a woman who is genuinely not interested and then it's a rant about how all men are animals/pigs/yaddayadda.



Can't have it both ways.

I don't mind approaching on a sexual basis; if it's a no, I'm onto the next one. But, wading the double-standard stated above, for anything more serious, is not worth the time. I'm not looking to partner up with a woman who's stuck in high school mode. I won't waste my time approaching and then have to determine if her decline was legit or a first step in some dumbass back and forth.


"No means no, correct?"

"No" is often not a personal rejection, but a rejection of the way you approach someone. Going for an above average attractive, 20 something, is not going to work most of the time. She gets hit on so much, that saying "no" to a stranger is a defense mechanism, that she needs to overcome first. Have some patience. Try again another time, after changing tactics. Establishing a connection (eye contact, smile) and focusing on her for many minutes before approaching may help, at least to see if she enjoys your attention. Let her "choose" you, before you approach her.


Yeah @ElvisStalinWoods "Try again another time, after changing tactics. Establishing a connection (eye contact, smile) and focusing on her for many minutes before approaching may help, at least to see if she enjoys your attention. Let her "choose" you, before you approach her."

Like these guys...

User Submitted Image

(Norman Bates)


User Submitted Image

(Zac Efron portraying Ted Bundy)



You wouldn't want them to think you're a creeper anyting. 🤭


Lmao 😂, well put.

Just play a one man masquerade until she takes the bait. Then some people wonder how they wind up tied up with "Toxic" characters


No, it's just men who wonder why they get rejected Big Grin

Btw, nobody said to play anything. Be yourself...I was just suggesting which variante of yourself would be less likely to get the boot when accosting a female.


Sure, playing variants for a lay ain't so bad, but again, for anything more solid, that's an absolutely toxic way of operating. If you're looking to draw a long term partner, applying different facades to partner up is groundwork for a shitty relation.


Facade, my ass! Look at her, repeatedly, till you feel like smiling. Or till you meet her eyes, and she smiles at you.

If you don't feel like looking at her or smiling, even nervously or internally, and you don't even feel like returning her smile, then......Dude, why are approaching her for....?


Because I'm not Forrest Gump. I feel fascination or interest without having to look like a lovestruck Jackass to put that message across. There's some significant amount of fantasy saturating your perception here.

Also, you're really laying it on thick and very simplistic to think that every woman (interested or not) will magically respond to someone pretty much leering at her.

User Submitted Image
click to expand
Well, if she smiled back, that would be a response.

I don't know how you look like when you "feel fascination or interest". Do you?
Women have always been the instigator

We had different social cues throughout history to say ‘i want you, come get me’

I will make the first move. One, because I pick what I want vs whatever creeper chases. Two, I like to chase a lil.

Its not my job to maintain momentum, but I’ll get the ball rolling.
Posted by Jade_Alexander

Women have always been the instigator

We had different social cues throughout history to say ‘i want you, come get me’

I will make the first move. One, because I pick what I want vs whatever creeper chases. Two, I like to chase a lil.

Its not my job to maintain momentum, but I’ll get the ball rolling.


Agreed, but now it seems like you instigate and keep up the momentum.

I use to think I’d die alone too before making all or most of the moves but I’m starting to evolve my thinking 🤔 so far things are going in the direction I want and at a good pace.
Posted by sweethearts
Posted by Jade_Alexander

Women have always been the instigator

We had different social cues throughout history to say ‘i want you, come get me’

I will make the first move. One, because I pick what I want vs whatever creeper chases. Two, I like to chase a lil.

Its not my job to maintain momentum, but I’ll get the ball rolling.


Agreed, but now it seems like you instigate and keep up the momentum.

I use to think I’d die alone too before making all or most of the moves but I’m starting to evolve my thinking 🤔 so far things are going in the direction I want and at a good pace.
click to expand


I don’t really overthink

In my experience men tend to over invest then slowly back away

So I kinda take everything with a grain of salt the first few weeks.
thought about this and i just realized how super assertive/proactive i can be. though i don't think i'm always like this coz i'm so lazy but i can clearly recall non-stop going after a guy for 10 days straight coz you snooze, you lose to cardinal women. and now he's with me. but like... i can't even bear the thought of not getting what i want.

i'm actually more timid when i'm not interested or i don't trust someone.

but when i'm sure, i'm a total P S Y C H O about it.

also i'm a first houser if that counts.

and there's this theory that i have that being the chaser gives you more power. though i'm all for mutual assured lovebombing. so when i spot a professional, i chase (you know how rare that is when every guy is negging?). but if it doesn't feel like a cult then meh.
is that gemiatric?
Posted by GemiAwesomeAss
Posted by sweethearts

Has it come to this? Women having to make the first move? Recently because of this corona bs, I’ve had to go on dating sites and the guys don’t ever IMO make the first move ( maybe it’s just me...) never had any problems in RL then talking to a mate the other day, I asked how he and his now ex got together and he said, they went out on a date and she didn’t leave him alone after that. She chased him down and then got pregnant...! Wtf? 😂 he’s been single for a few years again so maybe the ladies aren’t as aggressive.

Is this the way it is these days? It takes away from my womanhood having to make the first move all the time!


That’s SO funny! Woman had a mission and had accomplished it! I am wondering if child is his...
click to expand
Way to make an entrance Gemitati ❤️

Yes, they had 2 kids. He’s a great father.
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