Normal to not connect with people much?
This topic was created in the Relationships forum by Orpheus on Thursday, September 6, 2012 and has 9 replies.
I am pretty comfortable being single. I like the freedom and the time to explore my interests and focus on myself. The only thing that really makes me consider trying to find a boyfriend is sexual desire. I was raised conservatively and still have residual guilt, so I am sure I would beat myself up for being a filthy whore if I had casual sex. But I do not really connect with anyone enough to consider a relationship. I am a romantic and I do not want to date someone just because.
I am just wondering if there are any drawbacks to not pursuing romance heavily in my youth? Particularly with developing relationship skills or something like that?
Maybe my standards are too high? Does it say something about me if all of my strong attractions are to people who are unavailable (geographically remote)? Basically, is there something wrong with me that I have not been bitten by the love bug? I am young yet.
I just seem to feel more like myself when I keep to myself.
I am just wondering if there are any drawbacks to not pursuing romance heavily in my youth? Particularly with developing relationship skills or something like that?
Maybe my standards are too high? Does it say something about me if all of my strong attractions are to people who are unavailable (geographically remote)? Basically, is there something wrong with me that I have not been bitten by the love bug? I am young yet.
I just seem to feel more like myself when I keep to myself.
I'm the same way. I actually think I'm much too comfortable being single. I wonder if I'll ever care to move from this comfort zone? That's the scary part.
I am a Virgo with a Taurus Moon and Aquarius Rising.
Posted by Orpheus
.... sexual desire. I was raised conservatively and still have residual guilt ....
lol .. this place is getting hilarious
Can I ask what is funny? Anyway, glad you could laugh.
I did some thinking on this.
To me, I am a pretty whole/self-sufficient person, always was a girl who could entertain herself. I want love and, more importantly, romance yet I do not put effort into pursuing it. I do not go out or try to meet/flirt with guys. I just look at it as too much trouble, drama, and most importantly effort.
I worry, I guess, that something is wrong with me. Because it is rare for me to feel connection/emotion to a guy or even just a person in general. I talk to my Mom about some things in real life and my friends online, but I do not go out much and when I do go out, I tend to only say what is required to perform the function then I keep to myself. The strange thing is that I rarely realize how alone I am or feel lonely. How much of an introvert I am. I am not super shy, I just hold myself apart from others reflexively. I do not know how to be close to people.
I sometimes think I am cold or not properly human, because I am not as social as I "should" be. I wonder what I am missing out on by not connecting with others romantically or otherwise. I do not tend to do anything about it, though.
To me, I am a pretty whole/self-sufficient person, always was a girl who could entertain herself. I want love and, more importantly, romance yet I do not put effort into pursuing it. I do not go out or try to meet/flirt with guys. I just look at it as too much trouble, drama, and most importantly effort.
I worry, I guess, that something is wrong with me. Because it is rare for me to feel connection/emotion to a guy or even just a person in general. I talk to my Mom about some things in real life and my friends online, but I do not go out much and when I do go out, I tend to only say what is required to perform the function then I keep to myself. The strange thing is that I rarely realize how alone I am or feel lonely. How much of an introvert I am. I am not super shy, I just hold myself apart from others reflexively. I do not know how to be close to people.
I sometimes think I am cold or not properly human, because I am not as social as I "should" be. I wonder what I am missing out on by not connecting with others romantically or otherwise. I do not tend to do anything about it, though.
Posted by Orpheus
I did some thinking on this.
To me, I am a pretty whole/self-sufficient person, always was a girl who could entertain herself. I want love and, more importantly, romance yet I do not put effort into pursuing it. I do not go out or try to meet/flirt with guys. I just look at it as too much trouble, drama, and most importantly effort.
I worry, I guess, that something is wrong with me. Because it is rare for me to feel connection/emotion to a guy or even just a person in general. I talk to my Mom about some things in real life and my friends online, but I do not go out much and when I do go out, I tend to only say what is required to perform the function then I keep to myself. The strange thing is that I rarely realize how alone I am or feel lonely. How much of an introvert I am. I am not super shy, I just hold myself apart from others reflexively. I do not know how to be close to people.
I sometimes think I am cold or not properly human, because I am not as social as I "should" be. I wonder what I am missing out on by not connecting with others romantically or otherwise. I do not tend to do anything about it, though.
Wow. I completely identified with this. There is absolutely nothing wrong with you. There is nothing wrong with not wanting a superficial connection with someone. I'd much rather be alone than caught in a flimsy relationship. And I was alone (not lonely) for a long time. You'll meet someone and it will be more than worth the wait. I was exactly like this (and still am) and had my first serious relationship almost 2 years into college. It felt very natural and right. You shouldn't feel a need to force something that isn't there. In all honesty, I LOVED being single, but a special person came along and made me want to change that immediately...
What's your venus?
Um...(and this is coming from a Cancer mars) invest in at least two silver bullet playthings, batteries not included
Signed Up: Sep 10, 2010
Comments: 0 · Posts: 4684 · Topics: 51
Comments: 0 · Posts: 4684 · Topics: 51
Posted by harry99Posted by PotHeadVirgo22
I agree......my solution?....***Fuck romance...Get money***...
Hellz yeahclick to expand
^
this
I didn't have a real boyfriend till i was 20. I think it's totally fine your like that.
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