Pisces man's dirty little secret

This topic was created in the Relationships forum by TaurusFemale82 on Monday, March 20, 2017 and has 44 replies.
For the last 4 years I have been a Pisces man’s dirty little secret, to which 3 of those he was married. His wife passed away suddenly and unexpectedly about 14 months ago. Last May we found out we were expecting a baby who coincidentally had a due date of the same day as his deceased wife’s birthday (go figure, 365 days a year and it had to be) Our son had zero heartbeat around the 17 week ultrasound and therefore was a fetal demise. He never mentioned to anybody, co-workers, family etc that he was even expecting a child. He claims to be in love with me, but continues to tell lie after lie about stupid insignificant things. I have approached him several times on when he plans on discussing the extent of our relationship with family, friends etc to which his reply is “I’m just not prepared to do that in a way yet where I wont be destructive with the people I love” His deceased wife’s mother is my former eating disorder counsoler, but his brother has me blocked on social media and I’VE NEVER EVEN met the man. The lies and secrecy is just too much. He has never let me visit his home even. He left me to deliver our deceased son in a hospital alone and was okay resting his head and sleeping that night and not being there for me. I have made every effort in regards to thoughtful little gifts, making sure he has his favorite soda in the fridge at my house when he comes to visit for an hour or two here and there. I’m frustrated with being his dirty little secret and I don’t know what to do from here or where to go. I caught him in another lie two days ago, which he tried to justify and explain with a bogus story, but when is enough enough? Should I wait for him to contact me and do not contact him again until? At this point in time, I’m his unpaid prostitute…… (I’ve been the one giving and giving him money for help)

I'm 34, he's 48


You're a special kind of stupid.
Listen, sorry about the baby and all.

"But you can't make a hoe a housewife." - Dr. Dre
Alright.....who is this? This isn't a real post. It can't be.
Im very real. I was unaware he was married until 2 years in. The last year his wife was alive we were only communicating through messenger for the simple fact he insisted he was the biological father to my now 2 year old which I knew he wasn't. I had moved on when she was conceived because I had found out he was married We were not intimate again until after her passing
I'm glad you all see this as a joke. I'm asking for advice, not to be called names. Like I just said I was unaware he was married until 2 years in. The last year his wife was alive we were only communicating through messenger for the simple fact he insisted he was the biological father to my now 2 year old which I knew he wasn't. I had moved on when she was conceived because I had found out he was married. We were not intimate again until after her passing
Good morning,

Google this Holy Bible verse 1 Corinthians 13:4-8

1 Corinthians 13:4-8New International Version (NIV)

4 Love is patient, love is kind. It does not envy, it does not boast, it is not proud. 5 It does not dishonor others, it is not self-seeking, it is not easily angered, it keeps no record of wrongs. 6 Love does not delight in evil but rejoices with the truth. 7 It always protects, always trusts, always hopes, always perseveres.

8 Love never fails. But where there are prophecies, they will cease; where there are tongues, they will be stilled; where there is knowledge, it will pass away.

IS THIS THE TYPE OF LOVE YOU WANT TO CONTINUE TO RECEIVE FROM THIS "man" (regardless of his zodiac sign)???

Hug cyber hugs!

Love,

Eva

PS: Sit there on your chair and "ponder" on the Holy Bible verse. You'd be better off being with a man that "doesn't love you" because well, he'll treat you better. Please don't respond in 30 seconds; respond back in 30 minutes after you've "pondered" as to his "Love for you".
If he couldnt even be by your side in a moment that will probably the hardest one in your life and you STILL wonder if you should be in contact with this man I can only agree with the ladies above...come on man!

I have symphaty for your situation, but you should learn after a few times of him letting you know you will never be more than that

Self respect girl

Good luck
sorry about the baby and all but geez, find someone who wants to be with you ... I'm sure he's still grieving in a big way and may feel some guilt and he's got to work all that out so just leave him alone and stop "giving to get" ...
capmercury87 you didn't obviously read I was unaware he was married until 2 years in. The last year his wife was alive we were only communicating through messenger for the simple fact he insisted he was the biological father to my now 2 year old which I knew he wasn't. I had moved on when she was conceived because I had found out he was married. We were not intimate again until after her passing.

Sleeping with a widower is NOT sinning. I did not sleep with him once I had solid proof he was married, hence the reason my 2 year old isn't his.
Posted by cvurko
I don't understand what advice are you looking for? He lied to you for 2 years and yet you are still wondering what to do. Why would you even think about being with somebody who has lied to you like that?

Dunno, honesty is a big deal for me so maybe im projecting, but come on...
yes that would suck and how does that happen ... lies, games, deceit, uncaring attitude ... what is the question here!
Listen, you aren't going to find advice on here.

Even if you are a real person, and this is a real story, this is not the place for you. You are sitting here saying you didn't know for 2 years, but let's be real, you suspected it. I get a feeling he never took you out in public anywhere. You even call yourself the dirty little side piece, because deep down you knew.

You sound like a whore to me too. Let's do simple math, you have a 2 year old, and women are usually pregnant for 9.5 months in total (9 months is bull), which means you got knocked up about 3 years ago. If you were dealing with this dude for 4 years, that means you were banging some other dude while banging married peen. Cause that only leaves a deficiency of a year, but by your numbers, you didn't stop sleeping with him until 2 years in.

Girl, gtfo. If your second child was born alive, you would be having two kids with 2 different fathers. Learn to use birth control. JFC.

The fuck you want advice from us for? You will NEVER hold the title of wife. He doesn't love you. He doesn't even want anyone to know about you. Move the fuck on.
You can't blame us for being skeptical. There have been quite a few troll threads.

My own relationship story was pretty unbelievable when I first posted it. Love sucks. Maybe I'm just bitter and jaded but that is how I feel.

This man sounds too wrapped up in his own life to be concerned with yours. Save yourself any future misery and move on. It will be hard but worth it.
Posted by TaurusFemale82

I'm asking for advice





Advise? for what?

Are you looking for people to explain to you how to think rationally?

I mean, you present a scenario where you're a dirtbag to him and seem to enjoy the treatment so much that you gladly pay for him, cater to him ...... and then act like you don't like it and want it to stop?

seriously?


You would actually ask us if you should stay with him? .... like you have no clue that being his whipping post, and being his rug to wipe his feet on should be unacceptable?


Like you don't know that? you have to ask someone?


seriously?


It's not that he is like this to you ... it's that you are absolutely clueless that you're not suppose to accept it, you don't know that you're suppose to have enough integrity to step away from this.


I just don't get how a person can be this ignorant. You really don't know, do you?



Posted by TaurusFemale82
Im very real. I was unaware he was married until 2 years in. The last year his wife was alive we were only communicating through messenger for the simple fact he insisted he was the biological father to my now 2 year old which I knew he wasn't. I had moved on when she was conceived because I had found out he was married We were not intimate again until after her passing
So you didn't know he was married... People can be shitty and hide their true selves. But your telling me you were ok being in a relationship with someone who never let you enter their home for 2 YEARS!!!
Posted by TaurusFemale82
For the last 4 years I have been a Pisces man’s dirty little secret, to which 3 of those he was married. His wife passed away suddenly and unexpectedly about 14 months ago.

I have approached him several times on when he plans on discussing the extent of our relationship with family, friends etc to which his reply is “I’m just not prepared to do that in a way yet where I wont be destructive with the people I love”
Look, he wasn't willing to expose you to the light and let those who ARE important in his life know of your existence. That his wife is now dead isn't going to change that.
Does he have any kids?
Nikistar my 2 year old was born very yearly gestational not at full term in the least or close. I have an extensive history of anorexia and she was born early for several reasons. I was not sleeping with two men. I have a history of marriage of 13 years to my first ever sexual partner and boyfriend. I can honestly say I can count on one hand "partners" so yes I've invested a lot of time and thought with this man I'm speaking about currently



This is awful. He's trash. Let's look at the positives, it was meant to be and now you have absolutely zero reason to talk to him. I would move away and or go on a long vacation to heal. Be thankful you aren't stuck with this garbage who put you through hell. Keep on trucking and drop him fast. Maybe some therapy would help to heal.
Posted by TaurusFemale82
Nikistar my 2 year old was born very yearly gestational not at full term in the least or close. I have an extensive history of anorexia and she was born early for several reasons. I was not sleeping with two men. I have a history of marriage of 13 years to my first ever sexual partner and boyfriend. I can honestly say I can count on one hand "partners" so yes I've invested a lot of time and thought with this man I'm speaking about currently



Uh huh sure.

Anorexia, fucking married peen, having a still born child, probably insecurity issues to, etc... And I am suppose to take you seriously, and think you aren't some sort of troll? Uh huh sure.

How about focus on fixing yourself, instead of trying to turn yourself into a housewife.
Any of you doubting me can message me and I'll give you my name and you can check me out via FB or whatever means
Posted by TaurusFemale82
Any of you doubting me can message me and I'll give you my name and you can check me out via FB or whatever means
Ok now I KNOW your a troll. No normal person would volunteer to give out personal info to faceless internet strangers. GTFOH
I'm by no means a troll nor a liar and you're right I don't have to prove that but I have nothing to hide.
User Submitted Image
Posted by bumboklatt
Posted by TaurusFemale82
For the last 4 years I have been a Pisces man’s dirty little secret, to which 3 of those he was married. His wife passed away suddenly and unexpectedly about 14 months ago. Last May we found out we were expecting a baby who coincidentally had a due date of the same day as his deceased wife’s birthday (go figure, 365 days a year and it had to be) Our son had zero heartbeat around the 17 week ultrasound and therefore was a fetal demise. He never mentioned to anybody, co-workers, family etc that he was even expecting a child. He claims to be in love with me, but continues to tell lie after lie about stupid insignificant things. I have approached him several times on when he plans on discussing the extent of our relationship with family, friends etc to which his reply is “I’m just not prepared to do that in a way yet where I wont be destructive with the people I love” His deceased wife’s mother is my former eating disorder counsoler, but his brother has me blocked on social media and I’VE NEVER EVEN met the man. The lies and secrecy is just too much. He has never let me visit his home even. He left me to deliver our deceased son in a hospital alone and was okay resting his head and sleeping that night and not being there for me. I have made every effort in regards to thoughtful little gifts, making sure he has his favorite soda in the fridge at my house when he comes to visit for an hour or two here and there. I’m frustrated with being his dirty little secret and I don’t know what to do from here or where to go. I caught him in another lie two days ago, which he tried to justify and explain with a bogus story, but when is enough enough? Should I wait for him to contact me and do not contact him again until? At this point in time, I’m his unpaid prostitute…… (I’ve been the one giving and giving him money for help)

I'm 34, he's 48
"The lies and secrecy is too much"

If only the Titanic had this much Irony
click to expand
It didn't have enough iron-y in the bolts that held the compartments together which is why it sank.
Anyway lmao @ dating someone for 2 years and not knowing they're married or in a relationship.

GTFOH.
Posted by bumboklatt
Posted by Damnata
Posted by bumboklatt
Posted by TaurusFemale82
For the last 4 years I have been a Pisces man’s dirty little secret, to which 3 of those he was married. His wife passed away suddenly and unexpectedly about 14 months ago. Last May we found out we were expecting a baby who coincidentally had a due date of the same day as his deceased wife’s birthday (go figure, 365 days a year and it had to be) Our son had zero heartbeat around the 17 week ultrasound and therefore was a fetal demise. He never mentioned to anybody, co-workers, family etc that he was even expecting a child. He claims to be in love with me, but continues to tell lie after lie about stupid insignificant things. I have approached him several times on when he plans on discussing the extent of our relationship with family, friends etc to which his reply is “I’m just not prepared to do that in a way yet where I wont be destructive with the people I love” His deceased wife’s mother is my former eating disorder counsoler, but his brother has me blocked on social media and I’VE NEVER EVEN met the man. The lies and secrecy is just too much. He has never let me visit his home even. He left me to deliver our deceased son in a hospital alone and was okay resting his head and sleeping that night and not being there for me. I have made every effort in regards to thoughtful little gifts, making sure he has his favorite soda in the fridge at my house when he comes to visit for an hour or two here and there. I’m frustrated with being his dirty little secret and I don’t know what to do from here or where to go. I caught him in another lie two days ago, which he tried to justify and explain with a bogus story, but when is enough enough? Should I wait for him to contact me and do not contact him again until? At this point in time, I’m his unpaid prostitute…… (I’ve been the one giving and giving him money for help)

I'm 34, he's 48
"The lies and secrecy is too much"

If only the Titanic had this much Irony
It didn't have enough iron-y in the bolts that held the compartments together which is why it sank.
OP is sinking as well
click to expand
Posted by bumboklatt
Posted by Damnata
Posted by bumboklatt
Posted by Damnata
Posted by bumboklatt
Posted by TaurusFemale82
For the last 4 years I have been a Pisces man’s dirty little secret, to which 3 of those he was married. His wife passed away suddenly and unexpectedly about 14 months ago. Last May we found out we were expecting a baby who coincidentally had a due date of the same day as his deceased wife’s birthday (go figure, 365 days a year and it had to be) Our son had zero heartbeat around the 17 week ultrasound and therefore was a fetal demise. He never mentioned to anybody, co-workers, family etc that he was even expecting a child. He claims to be in love with me, but continues to tell lie after lie about stupid insignificant things. I have approached him several times on when he plans on discussing the extent of our relationship with family, friends etc to which his reply is “I’m just not prepared to do that in a way yet where I wont be destructive with the people I love” His deceased wife’s mother is my former eating disorder counsoler, but his brother has me blocked on social media and I’VE NEVER EVEN met the man. The lies and secrecy is just too much. He has never let me visit his home even. He left me to deliver our deceased son in a hospital alone and was okay resting his head and sleeping that night and not being there for me. I have made every effort in regards to thoughtful little gifts, making sure he has his favorite soda in the fridge at my house when he comes to visit for an hour or two here and there. I’m frustrated with being his dirty little secret and I don’t know what to do from here or where to go. I caught him in another lie two days ago, which he tried to justify and explain with a bogus story, but when is enough enough? Should I wait for him to contact me and do not contact him again until? At this point in time, I’m his unpaid prostitute…… (I’ve been the one giving and giving him money for help)

I'm 34, he's 48
"The lies and secrecy is too much"

If only the Titanic had this much Irony
It didn't have enough iron-y in the bolts that held the compartments together which is why it sank.
OP is sinking as well

Hahaha German Humor, it exists!

click to expand
IKR

Girl really? Sorry for the loss of your baby but COME ON NOW .. he's just not that into u
Ok, so I'm not gonna question if you're REAL or FAKE... only because I have REAL advice for this story.

Not only do I have advice, but my aunt been through something similar to this... the only thing was the man wasn't married, he had a girlfriend and my aunt got pregnant...

At 6months pregnant, she loss her baby (Like she literally had 3 more months to go???).. and its crazy because days before she loss her baby, she asked the father to come with her to her Doc appointment.. he declined and started telling her "that's not my baby, I want a DNA test".... come to find out he started saying that to my aunt because his "real girlfriend" found out and he didn't want to risk the relationship with her... and crazy thing is my aunt's a Taurus as well.... ?? You guys can be so DESPERATE for love, I guess its not y'all fault it's Venus'

When I was reading this post, I thought about my aunt and what she went through..... anyways here's my REAL advice:

I know lossing a baby is HARD, especially since you carried the baby for a couple months.. BUT look at this as your opportunity to START FRESH!!!

Think about how miserable you would've been raising a kid with a man who isnt public about you??? You would have been M.I.S.E.R.A.B.L.E

Imagine how your son wouldn't get any money from his father because for all this time he's been taking your money, and a habit doesn't break overnight, so he would've continued to do such...

Also, the baby would've never got to meet his fathers family, etc etc.... Take this loss as a good opportunity... you don't have to be stuck with him, now MOVE ON and start NEW!!!

The pain you're feeling right now it will past... try to focus on you.. Once you learn to love yourself, NO ONE can fuck with you.... you wouldn't need their love because YOU LOVE YOU and won't settle with anyone who can't give YOU love like how you DESERVE it...

This is a new beginning, use it.. Trust me I know what I'm saying!!!!


Posted by TaurusFemale82
...when is enough enough?


The exact moment you realize you deserve better and decide to walk away.


Posted by TaurusFemale82
Any of you doubting me can message me and I'll give you my name and you can check me out via FB or whatever means


User Submitted Image

Now you're doing the most. You're way too pressed to convince a bunch of strangers that your story is real.

The responses will be the same, troll or not given the story itself.

Posted by P-Angel

You're a special kind of stupid.
?? Lol !!
Sad bitches be sad.


Alls these people telling her to move on, to dump him and start on herself and a new life. When in reality, what she is looking for is someone to tell her how get the man to keep her special, and how to get him to take her seriously for all that she has endured in the name of love.

Nobody in here has actually addressed what she is asking for.
Posted by P-Angel

Alls these people telling her to move on, to dump him and start on herself and a new life. When in reality, what she is looking for is someone to tell her how get the man to keep her special, and how to get him to take her seriously for all that she has endured in the name of love.

Nobody in here has actually addressed what she is asking for.
because that ain't gonna happen!
Posted by PhoenixRising
Posted by TaurusFemale82
...when is enough enough?


The exact moment you realize you deserve better and decide to walk away.


click to expand
+1000
maybe his wife didn't "die" suddenly *insert dramatic music*


Maybe she didn't die at all ..... it's possible he just told you that to get in your panties.

Certainly he realizes that you're gullible enough to believe anything he says
To address your real question ........


To get him to take you seriously ... close your fucking legs, close your wallet, and stop running to his beck and call. (or is it beckon call, or beck-n-call).

the only way to change is view of you now is to gain some fucking dignity, and being so eager to be his trash bitch that he can fuck and get money from anytime he wants it. Changing yourself to become a decent and respectful person is the only way to get another to change their perspective about you.

However, considering it's a Fish .... it's doubtful you'll get anything other than harshness. Once they make a decision about a nasty person's character, hell would freeze over before they would treat you nice. No matter how many tricks you play, or tears you let fall.
Someone has a grudge against Bulls.

This poster can't be for real.

smile smile smile
Posted by TaurusFemale82
For the last 4 years I have been a Pisces man’s dirty little secret, to which 3 of those he was married. His wife passed away suddenly and unexpectedly about 14 months ago. Last May we found out we were expecting a baby who coincidentally had a due date of the same day as his deceased wife’s birthday (go figure, 365 days a year and it had to be) Our son had zero heartbeat around the 17 week ultrasound and therefore was a fetal demise. He never mentioned to anybody, co-workers, family etc that he was even expecting a child. He claims to be in love with me, but continues to tell lie after lie about stupid insignificant things. I have approached him several times on when he plans on discussing the extent of our relationship with family, friends etc to which his reply is “I’m just not prepared to do that in a way yet where I wont be destructive with the people I love” His deceased wife’s mother is my former eating disorder counsoler, but his brother has me blocked on social media and I’VE NEVER EVEN met the man. The lies and secrecy is just too much. He has never let me visit his home even. He left me to deliver our deceased son in a hospital alone and was okay resting his head and sleeping that night and not being there for me. I have made every effort in regards to thoughtful little gifts, making sure he has his favorite soda in the fridge at my house when he comes to visit for an hour or two here and there. I’m frustrated with being his dirty little secret and I don’t know what to do from here or where to go. I caught him in another lie two days ago, which he tried to justify and explain with a bogus story, but when is enough enough? Should I wait for him to contact me and do not contact him again until? At this point in time, I’m his unpaid prostitute…… (I’ve been the one giving and giving him money for help)

I'm 34, he's 48


His wife "passed away suddenly and unexpectedly"? Oh, boy.

Posted by TaurusFemale82
For the last 4 years I have been a Pisces man’s dirty little secret, to which 3 of those he was married. His wife passed away suddenly and unexpectedly about 14 months ago. Last May we found out we were expecting a baby who coincidentally had a due date of the same day as his deceased wife’s birthday (go figure, 365 days a year and it had to be) Our son had zero heartbeat around the 17 week ultrasound and therefore was a fetal demise. He never mentioned to anybody, co-workers, family etc that he was even expecting a child. He claims to be in love with me, but continues to tell lie after lie about stupid insignificant things. I have approached him several times on when he plans on discussing the extent of our relationship with family, friends etc to which his reply is “I’m just not prepared to do that in a way yet where I wont be destructive with the people I love” His deceased wife’s mother is my former eating disorder counsoler, but his brother has me blocked on social media and I’VE NEVER EVEN met the man. The lies and secrecy is just too much. He has never let me visit his home even. He left me to deliver our deceased son in a hospital alone and was okay resting his head and sleeping that night and not being there for me. I have made every effort in regards to thoughtful little gifts, making sure he has his favorite soda in the fridge at my house when he comes to visit for an hour or two here and there. I’m frustrated with being his dirty little secret and I don’t know what to do from here or where to go. I caught him in another lie two days ago, which he tried to justify and explain with a bogus story, but when is enough enough? Should I wait for him to contact me and do not contact him again until? At this point in time, I’m his unpaid prostitute…… (I’ve been the one giving and giving him money for help)

I'm 34, he's 48


You're not Amber Frey, are you?

I'm traumatized by the lack of common sense here - and above all - I feel mostly for the 2 year old ...


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