Question for anyone who might be able to help

This topic was created in the Relationships forum by pgaller1088 on Monday, October 17, 2011 and has 20 replies.
I am having a issue with my girlfriend/ex-girlfriend which i am currently separated from and she means the world to me but as of late has had a temper in almost everything we talk about. This has caused a problem for us to communicate effectively in trying to re-establish our relationship and every argument just turns disastrous and our problems get worse. I am not sure what i should do to overcome this problem in our communication for i know i am not great at it either any advice anyone would have would be great.
Thanks
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Posted by pgaller1088
has had a temper in almost everything we talk about.
Thanks


Sounds like she needs to grow up ...people who tend to have tempers ongoing want things their way or want control on every aspect of everything...
If you have been trying to communicate calmly and she still causes arguments with a temper...she needs to grow up and the only way to do that is not putting up with it and walking...
Nothing better then a wake up call in my opinion...
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Maybe she is PMSing.
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Well unfortunately she just nit picky which goes for almost anything its not just a single thing actually. seriously if i breath to loud she gets irritated i am not perfect by any means and pms i ruled out because during her cycle she is worse which is no fun at all. I tried getting to the bottom of it but then her and i start talking about how my personality is flawed which then i start to think i am the problem. I am starting to think i should just walk away before things get so bad she hates me even though i am sure she would hate me anyway for basically giving up. idk its gonna take some more pondering for sure on my plan of action it seems.
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Posted by pgaller1088
Well unfortunately she just nit picky which goes for almost anything its not just a single thing actually. seriously if i breath to loud she gets irritated i am not perfect by any means and pms i ruled out because during her cycle she is worse which is no fun at all. I tried getting to the bottom of it but then her and i start talking about how my personality is flawed which then i start to think i am the problem. I am starting to think i should just walk away before things get so bad she hates me even though i am sure she would hate me anyway for basically giving up. idk its gonna take some more pondering for sure on my plan of action it seems.


oh dear, and you want to get back with her? lol!
tell me... is she a Taurus or a Virgo? hahaha!!! sorry... i need to stop procrastinating and woorrrrrkkkkkk Sad
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Sounds like u r fighting a losing battle my friend Sad Eff that beeyotch. Seems like she has issues ~ either w/ you or even w/out you. She is either ready to "get out" or isnt capable of giving what you want/need. Eff her!
You'd be much happier to move on. Good luck!
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@shellshocker LOL my first thought was Virgo... was going to actually inquire further prior to making an assumption, but, since you threw it out there smile
(Cap would be my other choice rather than Taurus - but that make sense too - not that Caps are nit picky, just that we're always right Winking - oh, the Earth signs ARE a force to be reckoned with, aren't they? smile)
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You've always had the option not to participate in the contact, once it has turned heated ..... you've always had the option to say, "nah, I'd rather not, gotta go (walk out door, and shout over shoulder) call me when you are able to talk calmly".

Whistle down the sidewalk, wave and smile at neighbors, bend over and pet a wandering cat .. isn't life lovely?

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Point is .... the moment she realizes that you aren't going to take her shit, she'll stop. To argue with her means you are taking it, you are taking it to argue back.
Just make sure she realizes that you are still just as fond of her as always ... you just won't participate in arguing with her ..... make sure she realizes that you will absolutely participate in a calm and rational conversation, should she decide to get a grip on herself.
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for those who are wondering her placements here they are
She is :
Sun - Virgo
Moon - Leo
Merc - Libra
Venus - Libra
Mars - Virgo
Jupiter - Cancer
Saturn - Cap
Uranus - Cap
Neptune - Cap
Pluto - Scorpio
Lilith - Libra
Asc. Taurus
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We already knew her sun ....
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You just have to resolve yourself into dealing with it, because that's how Virgo's are ... they won't actually communicate to the partner about the relationship, about what they like or dislike ... yet, if the partner doesn't read their mind and do everything right (without the Virgo input), then they will argue with you because you did it wrong.

Seriously, every person trying to date a Virgo goes through this ... you either deal with it, or leave .. but, you definitely aren't going to make the Virgo actually share relationship responsibility.
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I'm a Virgo (also w/ Mercury and Venus in Libra) and I'm not like that at all - sometimes I can be reserved but when I really feel something I share it (be it good or bad). My thought is this; If she literally says you breathe too loud, then you need to go away. She's aggravated. I know you said she's like that anyway so maybe its not (just) you but seriously, don't you think you deserve better?
She's obviously angry at/about something. Can you think what it may be? Her past? Her present? or is it you? That may be a start to rationalizing her behavior but then again, you gotta ask yourself 'is it worth it'? good luck!
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Posted by pgaller1088
for those who are wondering her placements here they are
She is :
Sun - Virgo
Asc. Taurus


BINGO!!! I didn't know her sun sign....
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Posted by pgaller1088
... she just nit picky which goes for almost anything its not just a single thing actually.
... seriously if i breath to loud she gets irritated
... I tried getting to the bottom of it but then her and i start talking about how my personality is flawed which then i start to think i am the problem.





Which of course we all know that by you saying you didn't know she was a Virgo is you lying ... because to even use a term like, "nit picky" is in every description ever written about Virgos.
So, in reality, you were being deceptive with intentions of trying to counter me saying that we all already knew her sign .. I guess to try and be protective over the Virgos.

Seriously ..... people don't mind making themselves look stupid at all, it appears.
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Our communication is rough actually we have sat and talk but that ends almost as well in an argument. lately though such as in the last week we had a chat and it was calm even though i was waiting for her to blow up she never did which was nice.
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She can only argue with you, if you arguing with her ... so be quiet and don't say a word, and she'll be quiet also.

Seriously .. it's not rocket science.
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Posted by P-Angel
You've always had the option not to participate in the contact, once it has turned heated ..... you've always had the option to say, "nah, I'd rather not, gotta go (walk out door, and shout over shoulder) call me when you are able to talk calmly".

Whistle down the sidewalk, wave and smile at neighbors, bend over and pet a wandering cat .. isn't life lovely?




Agree with this.
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Posted by P-Angel
Posted by pgaller1088
... she just nit picky which goes for almost anything its not just a single thing actually.
... seriously if i breath to loud she gets irritated
... I tried getting to the bottom of it but then her and i start talking about how my personality is flawed which then i start to think i am the problem.





Which of course we all know that by you saying you didn't know she was a Virgo is you lying ... because to even use a term like, "nit picky" is in every description ever written about Virgos.
So, in reality, you were being deceptive with intentions of trying to counter me saying that we all already knew her sign .. I guess to try and be protective over the Virgos.

Seriously ..... people don't mind making themselves look stupid at all, it appears.


Are you talking to me here? Seriously... you're saying that because he put the term "nit picky" in his description, I should automatically assume she is a Virgo without asking? I thought Taurus too... I guessed, and I was right and NO I didn't know she was a Virgo beforehand... because I wasn't following this thread and didn't know any background about it.... like you.
So tell me... what was the point of YOU posting this...
Posted by P-Angel
We already knew her sun ....
click to expand


to make yourself an authority on this topic, like all other topics or just in guessing people's sign from a two word description?
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well thank you all for the comments and advice
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