Right after having sex...
This topic was created in the Relationships forum by MsAristocracy on Monday, April 28, 2008 and has 18 replies.
Why is it that when men come over and if you both have sex that after the deed is done and you both clean yourselves up there is a short awkward "what do we do now?" period where there is much silence and small talk. Then after enough of that they get ready to go.
This is excluding the times men spend the night ove so, this question isn't for those times. For anyone who has wondered about this too, let's throw some possible reasons out there. Even better, I'd like to hear from the men about why they or their boys do this.
And, yes, I am asking for myself but also for other women who I know have experienced this behavior. We just want to know why guys don't chill around afterwards to watch tv, eat a snack, play a game, talk, etc.
Thanks!
This is excluding the times men spend the night ove so, this question isn't for those times. For anyone who has wondered about this too, let's throw some possible reasons out there. Even better, I'd like to hear from the men about why they or their boys do this.
And, yes, I am asking for myself but also for other women who I know have experienced this behavior. We just want to know why guys don't chill around afterwards to watch tv, eat a snack, play a game, talk, etc.
Thanks!
I think it's because that's all they wanted in the first place.
I have experienced that before. In general it's usually the one that cares the least(with less emotional attachment)about the relationship who tends to feel uncomfortable after sex, acting awkward or trying to get up and get dressed quickly..It's their way of distancing themselves from the intimacy of the act and letting others know not to have any expectations.
It's a good indication of a man who is not sure about the relationship..right up there with not calling when he says he would..
I'm a female & I do this. It's kind of hard to explain why & it does confuse the mess outta the guys, probably because they're expecting for me to want to hang & I don't, I'm more like "OK well that was fun, you can go now" LOL No I don't say that out loud but I'm sure they get the idea because I always act distant so they'll leave. If I'm at their house I'm the one throwing on my clothes & running out the back door LOL. This is why I do it.... I probably shouldn't have FWB ever because it's nearly impossible for me to separate sex from emotion unless I'm not interested in the guy & if I'm not interested in him as a partner, chances are we won't be having sex. So after sex, when I'm pushing him out the door or I'm running out of it myself, it's because I'm separating myself from the intimacy like Abby said. I set up boundaries with guys I'm hooking up with to protect myself. I have platonic friends to hang out with, without sex. Basically anyone I'm hooking up with is not one of those. They serve a purpose & once that purpose is met, I don't want them around. I don't want them around because I know myself & I know I'll eventually get feelings & complicate things. Now a guys reasons for acting the way I do may be totally different but this is my reason
I am not a man, but I do like to clean myself up after sex (it doesn't have to be immediately after we finish). It just seems natural for me to do so. Even when my guy stays the night or I stay with him, we both clean ourselves up before going to bed. Once we are clean we spend time being intimate (e.g cuddle, talk, hold hands, watch tv, etc.) I think for a lot of people - men and women getting up to clean up after sex is just a preference whether you are leaving right after sex or spending the night. It is just habit for me to clean myself up. I guess I just feel dirty after doing the dirty..lol
just because thats all they wanted
""It's a good indication of a man who is not sure about the relationship..""
correction: "not sure" = doesn't want
correction: "not sure" = doesn't want
"period where there is much silence and small talk. Then after enough of that they get ready to go."
"This is excluding the times men spend the night ove so, this question isn't for those times."
......... sounds to me like this is referencing ALOT of men coming over for sex .. some spend the night (for more sex presumably), while others take the offered pussy and leave.
What runs through my head isn't WHY a man would leave just after sex, rather ... why this happens often enough to even have this question linger in your mind.
"We just want to know why guys don't chill around afterwards to watch tv, eat a snack, play a game, talk, etc."
Every man I've ever slept with has always hung around and spent quality time with me ... of course, they were very few and meaningful relationships.
< never experienced what you have
"This is excluding the times men spend the night ove so, this question isn't for those times."
......... sounds to me like this is referencing ALOT of men coming over for sex .. some spend the night (for more sex presumably), while others take the offered pussy and leave.
What runs through my head isn't WHY a man would leave just after sex, rather ... why this happens often enough to even have this question linger in your mind.
"We just want to know why guys don't chill around afterwards to watch tv, eat a snack, play a game, talk, etc."
Every man I've ever slept with has always hung around and spent quality time with me ... of course, they were very few and meaningful relationships.
< never experienced what you have
I'm not too experienced with sex, but I crossed that line with a friend and completely freaked out afterwards and distanced myself and he would NOT leave me alone.
I refrain from having sex simply because I don't get emotionally attached to the act, and would end up having a thousand partners if I went out all willy nilly and satisfied some hormones. Even after I lost my virginity, he was all hugging on me and I was like UGH, get away! Lol.
I refrain from having sex simply because I don't get emotionally attached to the act, and would end up having a thousand partners if I went out all willy nilly and satisfied some hormones. Even after I lost my virginity, he was all hugging on me and I was like UGH, get away! Lol.
if they have feelings for you they want to stay,otherwise they got what they came forand go,its a horrible feeling if you can,t hack it dont keep seeing them
although some men need space after sex.
although some men need space after sex.
Hey, GF ..... you can suck my dick.
btw .. you mentioning my private life and making an assessment is being judgemental .. I don't expect you to have the ability to comprehend that concept.
You have no clue as to the relationship between MsA and I .. so, you can keep your judgements of how we talk to each other to yourself .. and simply answer the OP, instead of judging a responsers answer, like you're suppose to do (don't expect a Gemini to grasp that concept either).
btw .. you mentioning my private life and making an assessment is being judgemental .. I don't expect you to have the ability to comprehend that concept.
You have no clue as to the relationship between MsA and I .. so, you can keep your judgements of how we talk to each other to yourself .. and simply answer the OP, instead of judging a responsers answer, like you're suppose to do (don't expect a Gemini to grasp that concept either).
Gemini Fox,
She's jealous because you have a great relationship with your boyfriend. Trust me.
I have a great relationship with my Scorpio and bitches show there jealousy so easily.
They wish they had what we have.
P-Angel is an old menopausal bitch. She wishes she could still have sex and probably isn't even happily married. Just a marriage of convenience. That is why she is on this forum 24/7.
You have no clue as to the relationship between MsA and
She actually thinks she has a relationship with MsA. She is a screen name P-Angel. You see GF? She lives on this forum. She has no social life. She considers screen names her friends.
She's jealous because you have a great relationship with your boyfriend. Trust me.
I have a great relationship with my Scorpio and bitches show there jealousy so easily.
They wish they had what we have.
P-Angel is an old menopausal bitch. She wishes she could still have sex and probably isn't even happily married. Just a marriage of convenience. That is why she is on this forum 24/7.
You have no clue as to the relationship between MsA and
She actually thinks she has a relationship with MsA. She is a screen name P-Angel. You see GF? She lives on this forum. She has no social life. She considers screen names her friends.
Right after sex I send the man home so that I can get back to making money.
Ms. A
That is pretty cute
"We just want to know why guys don't chill around afterwards to watch tv, eat a snack, play a game, talk, etc."
I can see it now ....okay lets go have a snack now. LOL
I was not going to post anything to this topic because I think half of the women who look at sex as being something to be cherished like a precious commodity and it is only for HIM to enjoy. I used to think the same way, and I am having much more fun now that I know that sex is just sex....period. Yes it can be special with someone you love, but I am sorry likeBrad .....your list is written from someone who is:
A - Very young and not experienced (It is not like the cinderella story) Hate to break the news to you.
B - You are a hardcore christian, and no offense to you if you are but that explains your belief system (however if guys really believed what you wrote.....why is sex a trillion dollar industry? Why are married men going after single women? Why are men paying for sex?
C - This is not the age of little house on the prairie. I hate to burst your bubble but it is not. Why do you think shows like 'Sex and the City' and 'Desperate Housewives' appeal to the masses.
D - Why would you say something so ignorant "He finds you are a bad woman and have nothing more to give him other than sex?" Most men are conscious when they are having casual relations with women and if she was bad why is he spending time with her? Most of all, why does he keep coming back to her? What makes her so bad? Because she is honest with herself and honest with her lover about how much she wants to be satisfied. Why is it only about him and his needs. Messages like this are what give women a bad name.
Bottom line I used to have the same misconceived notions that I would be a "bad woman" for exploring my own satisfaction in a sexual realm and I resent and get annoyed with women who still continue it is the norm to wait for her man to show up on his white horse. It is ridiculous and childish.
If you are in a relationship, dont for one second think your man does not flirt with another woman, look at another woman and think naughty thoughts, and most of all try to engage in sexual relations with another woman. In all honesty I think that is the only reason why stupid women would come on here and put other women down because of their own insecurities of what their other half is doing when they are around? Why do you think there are more women than men on this site?
That is pretty cute
"We just want to know why guys don't chill around afterwards to watch tv, eat a snack, play a game, talk, etc."
I can see it now ....okay lets go have a snack now.
LOLI was not going to post anything to this topic because I think half of the women who look at sex as being something to be cherished like a precious commodity and it is only for HIM to enjoy. I used to think the same way, and I am having much more fun now that I know that sex is just sex....period. Yes it can be special with someone you love, but I am sorry likeBrad .....your list is written from someone who is:
A - Very young and not experienced (It is not like the cinderella story) Hate to break the news to you.
B - You are a hardcore christian, and no offense to you if you are but that explains your belief system (however if guys really believed what you wrote.....why is sex a trillion dollar industry? Why are married men going after single women? Why are men paying for sex?
C - This is not the age of little house on the prairie. I hate to burst your bubble but it is not. Why do you think shows like 'Sex and the City' and 'Desperate Housewives' appeal to the masses.
D - Why would you say something so ignorant "He finds you are a bad woman and have nothing more to give him other than sex?" Most men are conscious when they are having casual relations with women and if she was bad why is he spending time with her? Most of all, why does he keep coming back to her? What makes her so bad? Because she is honest with herself and honest with her lover about how much she wants to be satisfied. Why is it only about him and his needs. Messages like this are what give women a bad name.
Bottom line I used to have the same misconceived notions that I would be a "bad woman" for exploring my own satisfaction in a sexual realm and I resent and get annoyed with women who still continue it is the norm to wait for her man to show up on his white horse. It is ridiculous and childish.
If you are in a relationship, dont for one second think your man does not flirt with another woman, look at another woman and think naughty thoughts, and most of all try to engage in sexual relations with another woman. In all honesty I think that is the only reason why stupid women would come on here and put other women down because of their own insecurities of what their other half is doing when they are around? Why do you think there are more women than men on this site?
Now to answer your questions MS. A........
It is simply an uncomfortable situation for the various reasons:
1 - He possibly really digs you and does not want to get attached or for you to do the same
2 - He is embarrased of what happened.....I won't go into details on what I mean by this
I honestly think those are the only two reasons.
I honestly have had great pillow talk with casual lovers afterward ...in particular a libra I am seeing. He feels like he can tell me anything.
I had a wam bam thank you man from a man who surprised me. We had been friends for 8 months and sex changed everything for him. My only explanation is he really liked me a lot, or he has small man syndrome. It was a shame I adored our friendship and asked him several times to go back to that, however he is young.
PD
It is simply an uncomfortable situation for the various reasons:
1 - He possibly really digs you and does not want to get attached or for you to do the same
2 - He is embarrased of what happened.....I won't go into details on what I mean by this
I honestly think those are the only two reasons.
I honestly have had great pillow talk with casual lovers afterward ...in particular a libra I am seeing. He feels like he can tell me anything.
I had a wam bam thank you man from a man who surprised me. We had been friends for 8 months and sex changed everything for him. My only explanation is he really liked me a lot, or he has small man syndrome. It was a shame I adored our friendship and asked him several times to go back to that, however he is young.
PD
Thanks GF for the advice on bootycall. 
I swear since I have taken a whole new perspective on sex, I feel empowered to be the one who gets to choose when and who. I no longer do any chasing of men. I don't have to.
PD
I swear since I have taken a whole new perspective on sex, I feel empowered to be the one who gets to choose when and who. I no longer do any chasing of men. I don't have to. PD
I dont know, I just feel out of energy. Usually want to recover sleeping. Happens with her also sometimes, but the difference is that from men expectations are putted high since they are known to want it in first place.
A woman is always ready, we are faster but wares faster too, in that moment after sex maybe we have no hormones left for a while.
I just dispair because I love, its not lust at all, but in that moment I feel tired with no emotion. For me is that, we men are ashamed of not having no emotion left after it, but some of us cuddle, I do
A woman is always ready, we are faster but wares faster too, in that moment after sex maybe we have no hormones left for a while.
I just dispair because I love, its not lust at all, but in that moment I feel tired with no emotion. For me is that, we men are ashamed of not having no emotion left after it, but some of us cuddle, I do
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