Aquastic007
@Aquastic
9 Years1,000+ Posts
Comments: 99 · Posts: 1598 · Topics: 53
Should your partner be your best friend?
Posted by ArkansassyAah! Maybe because m human......?but that was just one example ,there are things we with our bestfriends that we wouldn't do with our partners......
Why are you crushing on someone that isn't your partner?
Posted by ArkansassyThough that is f'd up, it's sadly reality. Lets be real, humans are naturally curious and it's okay to look or check out, but it's the chasing or pursuit of that curiosity that's flat out wrong.
Why are you crushing on someone that isn't your partner?
I would like my partner to be one of my best friends for sure. I look at it this way, different people bring out different traits within you. Depending on those traits, it opens you up in ways that only that specific person can bring out and it's up to you whether or not you enjoy those specifics about yourself or not.
It's silly to think of it in terms of having only one best friend. You can have multiple.
It's silly to think of it in terms of having only one best friend. You can have multiple.
Posted by ArkansassyGrass greener
Why are you crushing on someone that isn't your partner?
Posted by earlorg16Thank you,some people just think they stop seeing what's happening around them now that they are in relationship,and that is just sad.Posted by Arkansassy
Why are you crushing on someone that isn't your partner?
Though that is f'd up, it's sadly reality. Lets be real, humans are naturally curious and it's okay to look or check out, but it's the chasing or pursuit of that curiosity that's flat out wrong. click to expandclick to expand
Posted by earlorg16I know a couple who have cut all of their friend off because they now together...they do everything together everyday,all year ,they even work for the same company.
I would like my partner to be one of my best friends for sure. I look at it this way, different people bring out different traits within you. Depending on those traits, it opens you up in ways that only that specific person can bring out and it's up to you whether or not you enjoy those specifics about yourself or not.
It's silly to think of it in terms of having only one best friend. You can have multiple.
Posted by LePetitFiskVery true,it should be built slowly with time and patience,however some people want it to happen as soon as they start dating.
My definition of a bestfriend is someone who I can be completely open with and have no fear of judgement.
For me, it is something like that needs to be built with time. It is not instantaneous just because we are in a relationship and in love. If we can weather all the storms and build unyielding trust, then yes, I can call him my bestfriend.
Layers in a relationship is ideal, but not easily attained. Maybe that's why I'm single.
Your partner doesn’t have to be your best friend of course but it definitely is a sign of strength in a relationship imo.
I do agree with Fisk’s post overall though, that level of trust and openness is not acquired overnight.
I do agree with Fisk’s post overall though, that level of trust and openness is not acquired overnight.
Posted by AquasticThe definition of putting all your eggs in one basket. No thanks on that life style , but if it works for them, kudos!Posted by earlorg16
I would like my partner to be one of my best friends for sure. I look at it this way, different people bring out different traits within you. Depending on those traits, it opens you up in ways that only that specific person can bring out and it's up to you whether or not you enjoy those specifics about yourself or not.
It's silly to think of it in terms of having only one best friend. You can have multiple.
I know a couple who have cut all of their friend off because they now together...they do everything together everyday,all year ,they even work for the same company. click to expandclick to expand
Posted by earlorg16True,what happens if the relationship fails, then you loose two ,your partner and your best friend.Posted by AquasticPosted by earlorg16I know a couple who have cut all of their friend off because they now together...they do everything together everyday,all year ,they even work for the same company. click to expand
I would like my partner to be one of my best friends for sure. I look at it this way, different people bring out different traits within you. Depending on those traits, it opens you up in ways that only that specific person can bring out and it's up to you whether or not you enjoy those specifics about yourself or not.
It's silly to think of it in terms of having only one best friend. You can have multiple.
The definition of putting all your eggs in one basket. No thanks on that life style , but if it works for them, kudos! click to expandclick to expand
He was my best friend before he was my partner.
although there should always be some boundaries regardless. Some things are not ok.
although there should always be some boundaries regardless. Some things are not ok.
Posted by AquasticThe worst possible outcome. It's not even worth chancing it.Posted by earlorg16Posted by AquasticThe definition of putting all your eggs in one basket. No thanks on that life style , but if it works for them, kudos! click to expandPosted by earlorg16
I would like my partner to be one of my best friends for sure. I look at it this way, different people bring out different traits within you. Depending on those traits, it opens you up in ways that only that specific person can bring out and it's up to you whether or not you enjoy those specifics about yourself or not.
It's silly to think of it in terms of having only one best friend. You can have multiple.
I know a couple who have cut all of their friend off because they now together...they do everything together everyday,all year ,they even work for the same company. click to expand
True,what happens if the relationship fails, then you loose two ,your partner and your best friend. click to expandclick to expand
Posted by ArkansassyIt's not that you hiding it,for me it's about respecting your partner enough not to mess with his insecurities by bringing up people who are just ......nothing at all.Posted by AquasticPosted by earlorg16Thank you,some people just think they stop seeing what's happening around them now that they are in relationship,and that is just sad.Posted by Arkansassy
Why are you crushing on someone that isn't your partner?
Though that is f'd up, it's sadly reality. Lets be real, humans are naturally curious and it's okay to look or check out, but it's the chasing or pursuit of that curiosity that's flat out wrong. click to expand
click to expand
Then why hide it from your partner?
There is nothing wrong with being attracted to others.. click to expandclick to expand
I wud rather save that for a girl talk with my bestie.
Posted by HeavyEntertainmentShowLol this gif ....heeheee!
He was my best friend before he was my partner.
although there should always be some boundaries regardless. Some things are not ok.
I think you should be best friends, yes, but not sure I'd personally define it in terms of what you do/don't share. My best friend is the person I feel closest to, and most comfortable around, even if we're completely silent. There are means of communication beyond verbal, and I can honestly feel closer to my dog than most people in my life. Every person I'm friends with also sees a different side of me. I can sit for hours talking about the most arcane nerdy stuff with my Libra friend. Same convo would probably bore a partner to sleep so I wouldn't subject them to it. I mostly engage others where I see commonality betw. us.
On the matter of opp. sex attraction, that's a thorny but interesting issue. For me personally, seeing someone else as physically attractive is probably not worth mentioning; it doesn't really create "crushes" or do much for me in general. I can be objective about it, take note of it mentally like I would an inanimate object, but it doesn't move me all that much so no need to share it with anyone really. I wouldn't even call it attraction, which for me, means there's a strong emotional/mental bond forming. If I have that with another female, while in a relationship, I eventually need to work up the courage to tell my SO directly. I've failed to do that in the past and it didn't work out so well. OTOH, If my SO is the type that is constantly "crushing" on the latest flavor of the month, whether irl or celebrities, I'm fine with her talking to her gf's about that, and not me. Chances are I'm familiar enough with them to already know what they like, and I'm honestly too jealous to hear about it often; it really does kill the romantic connection for me if I'm in love, and my own mind will start to wander in its own ways.
On the matter of opp. sex attraction, that's a thorny but interesting issue. For me personally, seeing someone else as physically attractive is probably not worth mentioning; it doesn't really create "crushes" or do much for me in general. I can be objective about it, take note of it mentally like I would an inanimate object, but it doesn't move me all that much so no need to share it with anyone really. I wouldn't even call it attraction, which for me, means there's a strong emotional/mental bond forming. If I have that with another female, while in a relationship, I eventually need to work up the courage to tell my SO directly. I've failed to do that in the past and it didn't work out so well. OTOH, If my SO is the type that is constantly "crushing" on the latest flavor of the month, whether irl or celebrities, I'm fine with her talking to her gf's about that, and not me. Chances are I'm familiar enough with them to already know what they like, and I'm honestly too jealous to hear about it often; it really does kill the romantic connection for me if I'm in love, and my own mind will start to wander in its own ways.
Sorry nope. My sister is my best friend. He can’t really catch up to our 27 year head start on a friendship.
I do think it’s important to be friends, have shit in common to bond over. But equally important to have their own friends and own interests. I’m not trying to be bored with each other.
I do think it’s important to be friends, have shit in common to bond over. But equally important to have their own friends and own interests. I’m not trying to be bored with each other.
Why are we relegated to only having one bestfriend?
And as with all deep and meaningful friendships, they are usually built with time. Not overnight. So a partner can become your bestfriend, and should be come one of them. If you can't be completely accepted, open, and frank with the person you are most intimate with, then there is something acutely wrong with that relationship.
To note, I have a trait where when I am with a person, I don't see anyone else as being sexually appealing to me. So I have that going for me.
And as with all deep and meaningful friendships, they are usually built with time. Not overnight. So a partner can become your bestfriend, and should be come one of them. If you can't be completely accepted, open, and frank with the person you are most intimate with, then there is something acutely wrong with that relationship.
To note, I have a trait where when I am with a person, I don't see anyone else as being sexually appealing to me. So I have that going for me.
Posted by Aquastic
I hear a lot of people describing /refering their partners as their best friend.
Recently it has become a trend or tendency for partners to be their best friend.
For me ,I really don't or can't seem to see my partner to be my best friend since there are thing I do with my best friend that I wouldn't do with my partner,for example I can't giggle about a cute guy I'm crushing on with my partner, I mean wouldn't that seem like I am disrespectful to him?
And on the other side I can't have sex with my friend since I do that with my partner.
So is your partner your best friend really?
lmao@ giggling about a cute guy to your man hahah..u funny 😆
its like me going to my husband, OMG...honey this guy is soooooo Plutonic and hawt!!!
he's like u honey bunches. 😆
Posted by lisabethur8Posted by Aquastic
I hear a lot of people describing /refering their partners as their best friend.
Recently it has become a trend or tendency for partners to be their best friend.
For me ,I really don't or can't seem to see my partner to be my best friend since there are thing I do with my best friend that I wouldn't do with my partner,for example I can't giggle about a cute guy I'm crushing on with my partner, I mean wouldn't that seem like I am disrespectful to him?
And on the other side I can't have sex with my friend since I do that with my partner.
So is your partner your best friend really?
lmao@ giggling about a cute guy to your man hahah..u funny
its like me going to my husband, OMG...honey this guy is soooooo Plutonic and hawt!!!
he's like u honey bunches.
click to expandclick to expand
My point exactly, but would most definitely do that with your bestie
Posted by Aquasticu mean your man right?Posted by lisabethur8Posted by Aquastic
I hear a lot of people describing /refering their partners as their best friend.
Recently it has become a trend or tendency for partners to be their best friend.
For me ,I really don't or can't seem to see my partner to be my best friend since there are thing I do with my best friend that I wouldn't do with my partner,for example I can't giggle about a cute guy I'm crushing on with my partner, I mean wouldn't that seem like I am disrespectful to him?
And on the other side I can't have sex with my friend since I do that with my partner.
So is your partner your best friend really?
lmao@ giggling about a cute guy to your man hahah..u funny
its like me going to my husband, OMG...honey this guy is soooooo Plutonic and hawt!!!
he's like u honey bunches.
click to expand
My point exactly, but would most definitely do that with your bestie click to expandclick to expand
cause i'd rather my man did that ...tell me, hon, that woman is kind of hot ..like u are . lol
(and he has done that honestly)
he said, hey, i'm honest. and i'll never lie to you.
Posted by lisabethur8My darling he was crushing on that or those women,the "like you" was just said out of politeness.....Posted by AquasticPosted by lisabethur8Posted by Aquastic
I hear a lot of people describing /refering their partners as their best friend.
Recently it has become a trend or tendency for partners to be their best friend.
For me ,I really don't or can't seem to see my partner to be my best friend since there are thing I do with my best friend that I wouldn't do with my partner,for example I can't giggle about a cute guy I'm crushing on with my partner, I mean wouldn't that seem like I am disrespectful to him?
And on the other side I can't have sex with my friend since I do that with my partner.
So is your partner your best friend really?
lmao@ giggling about a cute guy to your man hahah..u funny
its like me going to my husband, OMG...honey this guy is soooooo Plutonic and hawt!!!
he's like u honey bunches.
click to expand
My point exactly, but would most definitely do that with your bestie click to expand
u mean your man right?
cause i'd rather my man did that ...tell me, hon, that woman is kind of hot ..like u are . lol
(and he has done that honestly)
he said, hey, i'm honest. and i'll never lie to you. click to expandclick to expand
It would've been a completely different conversation had he commented that to his friends
Posted by Aquasticmaybe.Posted by lisabethur8Posted by Aquasticu mean your man right?Posted by lisabethur8Posted by Aquastic
I hear a lot of people describing /refering their partners as their best friend.
Recently it has become a trend or tendency for partners to be their best friend.
For me ,I really don't or can't seem to see my partner to be my best friend since there are thing I do with my best friend that I wouldn't do with my partner,for example I can't giggle about a cute guy I'm crushing on with my partner, I mean wouldn't that seem like I am disrespectful to him?
And on the other side I can't have sex with my friend since I do that with my partner.
So is your partner your best friend really?
lmao@ giggling about a cute guy to your man hahah..u funny
its like me going to my husband, OMG...honey this guy is soooooo Plutonic and hawt!!!
he's like u honey bunches.
click to expand
My point exactly, but would most definitely do that with your bestie click to expand
cause i'd rather my man did that ...tell me, hon, that woman is kind of hot ..like u are . lol
(and he has done that honestly)
he said, hey, i'm honest. and i'll never lie to you. click to expand
My darling he was crushing on that or those women,the "like you" was just said out of politeness.....
It would've been a completely different conversation had he commented that to his friends click to expandclick to expand
lol
Posted by AquasticVru7uPosted by earlorg16Posted by ArkansassyThough that is f'd up, it's sadly reality. Lets be real, humans are naturally curious and it's okay to look or check out, but it's the chasing or pursuit of that curiosity that's flat out wrong. click to expand
Why are you crushing on someone that isn't your partner?
Thank you,some people just think they stop seeing what's happening around them now that they are in relationship,and that is just sad.
click to expandclick to expand
Posted by TellMeImPrettyI also tell everything
I really think so. I think it will just make the relationship a hell of a lot easier for both of you. Like think about how close you are to a friend that you’re not in a romantic relationship with and then think about the level of that bond—- and then add sex to the mix. It’s pretty spectacular and really incredible to be able to share that kind of intimacy with someone. I know couples that hide things from each other and talk butter about the other one behind their back... so crazy to me. I think my boyfriend is the only person I’ve never talked butter about.... unless it’s to his face lol. So yeah... I just think it’s important. There are so many people that we form shallow, meaningless relationships with throughout our lifetime that I just think why not be absolute best friends with the person you’re going to share your life with?
Might as well.
I mean, like anything it can have it’s downsides and I have experienced some. These relationships can create a lot of emotional damage any time one of you feels slightly betrayed or lied to maybe. It might not even be a big deal but if you’re close, tiny things can really take their toll too easily. Keeping secrets might be hard. Just recently was put in a situation by my bulls sister where she told me not to tell him about some crazy (very serious) stuff that was happening. Meanwhile inside my head I’m like “haha yeah right” and told him as soon as I had a second lmao
Yup! I don't even believe in best friends (platonic), I just think my partner is supposed to be my one and only. I will always want to hang out with my partner instead of any friends.
Posted by LittleStar
Personally I'm not a fan of the whole "best friend" thing. I've never found that it's particularly good to have your best friend also be your partner. Different needs being met there.
AAAABBBBSSSSOOOOLLLLUUUTTTEEELLYYYYYYYYY! Yes
Posted by LittleStarMy point,but my boyfriend is busy complaining that we not best friends yet
Personally I'm not a fan of the whole "best friend" thing. I've never found that it's particularly good to have your best friend also be your partner. Different needs being met there.
Posted by LittleStarHe just says I'm shy around him,and he can't be a hopeless romantic with me blah blah!Posted by AquasticPosted by LittleStar
Personally I'm not a fan of the whole "best friend" thing. I've never found that it's particularly good to have your best friend also be your partner. Different needs being met there.
My point,but my boyfriend is busy complaining that we not best friends yet click to expand
Instead of focusing on the title of "best friend" ask him specifically what needs aren't being met and see if it's something you can do to help with. Maybe he wants to go out more or needs more texting or more of something, who knows. He is missing something from the interaction and if it's not a personality thing and it's an action, it's something you can do.
If he is just complaining about the relationship itself not being what he wants then it's time to cut your losses. click to expandclick to expand
As for texting ,m always the one initiating texts.He doesn't invite me to his things,he just goes out with his friends,and I go out with mines.
We have separate lives.
Posted by LittleStarAlso ,he is currently unemployedPosted by AquasticPosted by LittleStar
Personally I'm not a fan of the whole "best friend" thing. I've never found that it's particularly good to have your best friend also be your partner. Different needs being met there.
My point,but my boyfriend is busy complaining that we not best friends yet click to expand
Instead of focusing on the title of "best friend" ask him specifically what needs aren't being met and see if it's something you can do to help with. Maybe he wants to go out more or needs more texting or more of something, who knows. He is missing something from the interaction and if it's not a personality thing and it's an action, it's something you can do.
If he is just complaining about the relationship itself not being what he wants then it's time to cut your losses. click to expandclick to expand
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Recently it has become a trend or tendency for partners to be their best friend.
For me ,I really don't or can't seem to see my partner to be my best friend since there are thing I do with my best friend that I wouldn't do with my partner,for example I can't giggle about a cute guy I'm crushing on with my partner, I mean wouldn't that seem like I am disrespectful to him?
And on the other side I can't have sex with my friend since I do that with my partner.
So is your partner your best friend really?