So ... It's Like That ,Hmm?
This topic was created in the Cancer forum by cappysweetie on Tuesday, April 18, 2006 and has 16 replies.
Recently, I just realized that some man have two types of women:
A) the women they have sexual involvement with. These women are more than likely reliable enough to be available when they need to "re-leave tension" and to have a good time with. There is also some emotional feelings here (it's really heard for me to believe a man can continue having sex with a woman or women ... along with going to parties with her or them and posing in photographs with her or them WITHOUT having some emotional bond ... if you do alot of stuff with them there just has to be something there in a man's heart for the women ... I would think) If he's an honest "player", he doesn't make any real commitment. He gives the "enjoy me for the moment" type of attitude. He tries to creep, but doesn't feel he has anything to hid.
B) The woman (usually just one) that they may have both an emotional and spiritual connection ... but here's the kicker ... they don't necessary have to have a sexual relationship with them. They just want them there for "moral" support. The man keeps her in hiding for fear that the women he's sleeping around with may learn of her. He also puts serious demands so she doesn't have to time for anyone else -- this keeps him from making a commitment while "still having his cake and eating it too (pound for pound if you catch my drift). The women of this type is often classified as the "good girl" and she has to uphold standrads that HE HIMSELF WOULD NOT. He also keeps watch over her by calling her and asking her to go out with him or to do him a favor ... WHILE PARKED IN HER DRIVEWAY ... but he is nice enough to wait until she get ready
Okay, these are the two types from my prospective
Recently I found out that I fit into one of those types -- guess which one ... it's after the letter A in the alphabat. If you all guessed B ... BINGO!!! I read something during with a male friend of mine (we all know who that is) that I really shouldn't have but now I understand a whole alot, but subconsciously I already knew it, like why he was absent for three weeks ... hope I'm making sense here. It's hard to be rational when you are slightly upset. Being the female that being seeked for emotional and spiritual support just doesn't make me feel too good... I feel like I've been put on a damn shelve .....
A) the women they have sexual involvement with. These women are more than likely reliable enough to be available when they need to "re-leave tension" and to have a good time with. There is also some emotional feelings here (it's really heard for me to believe a man can continue having sex with a woman or women ... along with going to parties with her or them and posing in photographs with her or them WITHOUT having some emotional bond ... if you do alot of stuff with them there just has to be something there in a man's heart for the women ... I would think) If he's an honest "player", he doesn't make any real commitment. He gives the "enjoy me for the moment" type of attitude. He tries to creep, but doesn't feel he has anything to hid.
B) The woman (usually just one) that they may have both an emotional and spiritual connection ... but here's the kicker ... they don't necessary have to have a sexual relationship with them. They just want them there for "moral" support. The man keeps her in hiding for fear that the women he's sleeping around with may learn of her. He also puts serious demands so she doesn't have to time for anyone else -- this keeps him from making a commitment while "still having his cake and eating it too (pound for pound if you catch my drift). The women of this type is often classified as the "good girl" and she has to uphold standrads that HE HIMSELF WOULD NOT. He also keeps watch over her by calling her and asking her to go out with him or to do him a favor ... WHILE PARKED IN HER DRIVEWAY ... but he is nice enough to wait until she get ready
Okay, these are the two types from my prospective
Recently I found out that I fit into one of those types -- guess which one ... it's after the letter A in the alphabat. If you all guessed B ... BINGO!!! I read something during with a male friend of mine (we all know who that is) that I really shouldn't have but now I understand a whole alot, but subconsciously I already knew it, like why he was absent for three weeks ... hope I'm making sense here. It's hard to be rational when you are slightly upset. Being the female that being seeked for emotional and spiritual support just doesn't make me feel too good... I feel like I've been put on a damn shelve .....
Oh no no no you're not getting off that easily. Tell us the fullll story 
LOL
Well ... honesty it's so deliciously complicated, I wouldn't be able to sum everything up at the moment ... you would think I was crazy. Some of my problem was in my old post -- That whole cappy meets crabby saga I posted on this board. I should've posted on the capricorn board ... don't know why I didn't ???????
Basically I was too investagative for my own good ... seek and you shall find ... oh boy... but this helped me come up with my prospectives that I've previously posted. Still, it just doesn't feel too good to be "Type B". I need to seriously run ...run ... as fast as I can! I hope the next secret won't be that he's mentally ill at the moment, if so ohhhhhhhhh SNAP!
So the guy is a Cancer?
Yep, he's about as crabby as he can be ........
Sweet&sour, I sorry I should have been more clear. He's the same cancer guy that I've vented about in previous posts. The only difference is that I discovered something concerning him ... AND NOW MY WHOLE PROSPECTIVE HAS CHANGED ... totally so to speak.
OooooooH cappysweetie... you've sparked my curiosity so cough it up
But I will say one thing, you shouldn't catagorize yourself. Generally speaking... those categories mIgHt be true in black n white but things just aren't that simple. I know that a lot of men would rather be monogamous with the one person they have feelings for. However, they may not be ready for a relationship, haven't had enough interest in anyone etc. but they NEED sex... they could hold off for long periods of time (masturbation) but will on occasion have one-nighters and if they have willing 'bootycalls' aWeSoMe for them- it's safer ummm and more convenient lol cuz they usually know the person.
Problem is that they aren't all that willing to cut off these types of relationships for possibly no sex at all.
I was thinking though, that, bootycalls and hanging out is totally different. Lets say that he's hanging out with one of these so called 'sex partners' and they go out, party, take pictures and spend time together... sounds like a full-blown relationship to me. This could very well be his girlfriend and she may not even know that he sees other chics, which is sad because he's cheating on her or possibly more who believe they are something more than what he tells you.
I'm saying this because, you don't need to have sex with a woman to take her out, hang out and party. I didn't have sex with all the guys I dated yet I still went out with some of them, partied, drank and got crazy together lol A couple of them turned into a bf... nice relationships.
My point is that if you feel like he's 'hiding' you it may be because he has a serious relationship. From my many guy friends I know that 'bootycalls' are JUST for sex, they don't even hang out and really don't care about whether they develop relationships outside of themselves. If HE views these relationships as only 'sex relationships' chances are that the women themselves don't know it
Anywho, that was my 99 cents
But I will say one thing, you shouldn't catagorize yourself. Generally speaking... those categories mIgHt be true in black n white but things just aren't that simple. I know that a lot of men would rather be monogamous with the one person they have feelings for. However, they may not be ready for a relationship, haven't had enough interest in anyone etc. but they NEED sex... they could hold off for long periods of time (masturbation) but will on occasion have one-nighters and if they have willing 'bootycalls' aWeSoMe for them- it's safer ummm and more convenient lol cuz they usually know the person.
Problem is that they aren't all that willing to cut off these types of relationships for possibly no sex at all.
I was thinking though, that, bootycalls and hanging out is totally different. Lets say that he's hanging out with one of these so called 'sex partners' and they go out, party, take pictures and spend time together... sounds like a full-blown relationship to me. This could very well be his girlfriend and she may not even know that he sees other chics, which is sad because he's cheating on her or possibly more who believe they are something more than what he tells you.
I'm saying this because, you don't need to have sex with a woman to take her out, hang out and party. I didn't have sex with all the guys I dated yet I still went out with some of them, partied, drank and got crazy together lol A couple of them turned into a bf... nice relationships.
My point is that if you feel like he's 'hiding' you it may be because he has a serious relationship. From my many guy friends I know that 'bootycalls' are JUST for sex, they don't even hang out and really don't care about whether they develop relationships outside of themselves. If HE views these relationships as only 'sex relationships' chances are that the women themselves don't know it
Anywho, that was my 99 cents
Okay tauruschic ... I'll cough up.
To make a insanely long story short. I assumed he goes out with these women because I saw him in a picture with one of them he told me about. It was her, an older man and him posing (he had a drink in his hand so I assumed he was at a party ... I'm not for sure) He has no idea that i've seen the picture -- she sent it to him. Their are other things that I've discovered also that has made me question many things ... I'll get into that later. He calls these women "his female friends" that he has sex with ... I don't know if anytings change (Cancers are moody) but he told me that their there with he needs to ... have a good time with (that sound soooo wrong doesn't it. I'm a girl and I take offense to that statement) Anyway, the same woman I saw him in picture with, he wrote a sexual poem to ... yes I read it and thought it was disrespect -- I couldn't believe he would write something like that ... the poem was basically about how much he desired her body and how he enjoyed having sex with her.... honestly, no joke. However, he loved it, she was estatic! However, the poem had no substance at all ... at least when Shakespeare wrote about sex, he used some tact ... he showed no respect for her at all, or maybe that's was a "confession of love" in his own way. I have no idea ....
To make a insanely long story short. I assumed he goes out with these women because I saw him in a picture with one of them he told me about. It was her, an older man and him posing (he had a drink in his hand so I assumed he was at a party ... I'm not for sure) He has no idea that i've seen the picture -- she sent it to him. Their are other things that I've discovered also that has made me question many things ... I'll get into that later. He calls these women "his female friends" that he has sex with ... I don't know if anytings change (Cancers are moody) but he told me that their there with he needs to ... have a good time with (that sound soooo wrong doesn't it. I'm a girl and I take offense to that statement) Anyway, the same woman I saw him in picture with, he wrote a sexual poem to ... yes I read it and thought it was disrespect -- I couldn't believe he would write something like that ... the poem was basically about how much he desired her body and how he enjoyed having sex with her.... honestly, no joke. However, he loved it, she was estatic! However, the poem had no substance at all ... at least when Shakespeare wrote about sex, he used some tact ... he showed no respect for her at all, or maybe that's was a "confession of love" in his own way. I have no idea ....
I know what you mean, I take offense to certain things too. I detest women being viewed as objects... pisses me off.
Don't know what to say about the poem, depends on how tactless it is... honestly, from the little info you've revealed I feel like him just taking the time to write it, means something. Maybe he has feelings for her?
What do you feel? Do you think he has feelings for you?
He could be confused.
How'd you get into his inbox?
Don't know what to say about the poem, depends on how tactless it is... honestly, from the little info you've revealed I feel like him just taking the time to write it, means something. Maybe he has feelings for her?
What do you feel? Do you think he has feelings for you?
He could be confused.
How'd you get into his inbox?
LOL, my goodness how did you know I had access to that He gave me his password 
I don't know what to feel ... at this point I don't believe he cares about me at all and yes I believe he has feelings for her, of course why wouldn't he, they are intiamate. Why he told me all that stuff, I have no clue but ... I didn't have feeling for him in that way until he told me he cared for me ... but March comes and he disappears ....
He gave me his password I don't know what to feel ... at this point I don't believe he cares about me at all and yes I believe he has feelings for her, of course why wouldn't he, they are intiamate. Why he told me all that stuff, I have no clue but ... I didn't have feeling for him in that way until he told me he cared for me ... but March comes and he disappears ....
the disappearing acts are wat broke down my respect for my mr.virgo ( well.. nolonger Mine cause i finally backed away gracefully)funny thing is.. i still want him..but i cant give him so many parts of me without knowing its just me and him.. honestly he treated me like the choice "B" girl too.. i was so deeply stunned by the whole ordeal that i have yet to figure the sh-- out.. all i know is how i STILL feel about him.. but ill wallow for a while.. the wounds are still fresh.. lol
hopelessdreamr,
He treated you like the chioce B girl too? Ugh! No matter what, it just doesn't make you feel to good after a while does it?
He treated you like the chioce B girl too? Ugh! No matter what, it just doesn't make you feel to good after a while does it?
..after a while?? immediately after the realization set in.. i was no more good.. the killing part: it didnt start like this.. some crazy time along the way.. he morphed into this caddy nonchalant Whatever..(for lack of more decent words) umm..funny thing is.. maybe it wasnt just all a sudden.. maybe i had on those rose glasses from the very first moment we meant almost 5 years ago.. hell...nethings possible.. i could coo myself to sleep with scenarios
At this point, I'm SOOOOOOOO happy I didn't have sexual relationships with that cancer man or else I'd be very emotionally broken ... he would've been my first and it would be hard to deal with the way he's acting now if things would've went farther. It's a GOOD thing he told me to wait until I'm married LOL!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! He says don't let men sweet talk me because all they want is sex, he enphasised the whole "wait until you have a husband" thing about six or seven weeks ago. He told me that it's important to keep my V until marriage, he has lectured me about this at least four times sense we've known each other -- which has been a year. I told him that I would listen (that's before he started acting stupid), but he cannot in live by what he's telling me ... screw him, do what I want!
Leave Your Feedback
We'd love to hear your thoughts! If you're not logged in, you can still share your feedback below. Your input helps us improve the experience for everyone. To post your own content or join the conversation, please log in or create an account.
Related Topics
@cappysweetie
Joined: Mar 18, 2006 · Topics: 499 · Posts: 23862
@hopelessdreamr
Joined: Dec 27, 2005 · Topics: 62 · Posts: 429
@Scorpius
Joined: Apr 15, 2006 · Topics: 47 · Posts: 3227
@sugaa
Joined: Mar 05, 2005 · Topics: 6 · Posts: 32
@Sidestepper
Joined: Mar 12, 2006 · Topics: 3 · Posts: 12
@BlueAqua
Joined: Dec 31, 2005 · Topics: 81 · Posts: 585
@sophie68
Joined: Mar 19, 2006 · Topics: 52 · Posts: 647
@Scorpius
Joined: Apr 15, 2006 · Topics: 47 · Posts: 3227
@babygurl3434
Joined: Apr 14, 2006 · Topics: 61 · Posts: 302
@babygurl3434
Joined: Apr 14, 2006 · Topics: 61 · Posts: 302