Why
This topic was created in the Relationships forum by thecrazyariestaurus on Tuesday, March 20, 2018 and has 20 replies.
I'm really trying to understand why I've gotten cheated on in all my relationships, and why I seem to attract guys who secretly have girlfriends. It's always so dramatic. Wtf is it? Am I too detached? Am I just doomed? Am I just a really shitty person and I'm attracting people like me? Do I seem like a slut/home wrecker? Do I just have really bad judgement? Am I too insecure? what is it? Is it because I have malefic planets in my 5th house? Is it my 8th house placements? Idk. I'm just venting. I'm tired of venting to my friends. I'm always the only one in the group who gets fucked over, and I'm sick of it.
No you're not doom. No it's not because you're detached. No this has nothing to do with your placements. No the situation does not result to your placement writing the chapters of your life.
What do you mean you're insecure? Insecure of the fact that you're getting cheated on, perhaps.
Don't worry your precious mind, take your time to evolve and realize that this doesn't have anything to do with your placement. You were just misfortuned on believing that this past relationships you had to endure were individuals that lied to you.
On the next aspect of getting into a relationship, get to know the person first. Take your time to get to know them and realize that mofo's aren't going to be worthy of being stressed about or crying for.
You can't control people to want you, and venting would take away the stress and emotions but worrying about hoes like them isn't worth any of your time.
Just do you, and be proud of what you have.
What do you mean you're insecure? Insecure of the fact that you're getting cheated on, perhaps.
Don't worry your precious mind, take your time to evolve and realize that this doesn't have anything to do with your placement. You were just misfortuned on believing that this past relationships you had to endure were individuals that lied to you.
On the next aspect of getting into a relationship, get to know the person first. Take your time to get to know them and realize that mofo's aren't going to be worthy of being stressed about or crying for.
You can't control people to want you, and venting would take away the stress and emotions but worrying about hoes like them isn't worth any of your time.
Just do you, and be proud of what you have.
We're bound to repeat the same mistakes until we learn.
Those men were your lessons.
Those men were your lessons.
Posted by DolluxxeLOVE THIS.
We're bound to repeat the same mistakes until we learn.
Those men were your lessons.
Just gotta get smarter when you pre-qualify these dudes. Stay emotionally detached until they show their true selves.
Not every dude is a lying cheating douche bag. Statistically speaking your bound to meet a decent one soon 🤞
Not every dude is a lying cheating douche bag. Statistically speaking your bound to meet a decent one soon 🤞
All of them have secret girlfreinds?
You'll need to look into what it is that attracts you to people like this. Find the source of it and change that pattern.
Posted by LeowwwwwNarcissism can not be healed.they screw up their own and others life. They are pathologically hard wired and no hope to change. They lack emphaty,tgat condition develop early childhood and stop the individual to grow in healthy way. They develop a false self which mimic emotions and protect their inner child as they hate themselves and everyone else. In relationsip they do not reciprocate, can't love because have no understanding what it's feel like. In short, hopelessPosted by thecrazyariestaurusAll? Ouch. Horrible.
I'm really trying to understand why I've gotten cheated on in all my relationships, and why I seem to attract guys who secretly have girlfriends.
Here's what I found... It's interesting.
https://www.google.ca/amp/www.paulcbrunson.com/blog/2013/07/31/dating-the-same-type-of-person-says-a-lot-about-you/amp/
Patterns:
The Narcissist
Description: His/Her charm, talent, success, beauty and charisma cast a spell on you and everyone around. His/Her conversation is scintillating! Once hooked, however, you battle with their demands, criticisms and self-centeredness.
Consistently Dating Narcissists Could Mean: You are also narcissistic. If you’re a narcissist, the common misconception is that you love you some you. Actually, you dislike yourself immensely. Your inflated self-flattery, perfectionism, and arrogance are merely covers for the self-loathing you don’t admit—usually even to yourself. Narcissists often attract and it’s very dangerous: They’ll need each other one minute and fight the next over whose needs come first. Narcissism can be healed with courage, time and a commitment to yourself.
The Emotionally Unavailable
Description: He/She doesn’t eagerly show up for you. They are full of excuses and indecisive. He/She talks about the past a lot. They are quick to claim they like you but he’s/she’s not looking for a committed relationship for whatever reasons.
Consistently Dating Emotionally Unavailable People Could Mean: You don’t feel deserving. Not feeling worthy typically originates because someone significant failed to stand up for you earlier in life. Someone essential to supporting your life wasn’t there, or was abusive, or was neglectful. As a result, you came away with a deep-down feeling that you are not worthy. To correct this trait, it is important to begin by confronting (and often forgiving) the person who originally failed you.
The Needs to Be Fixed
Description: He/She feels “beneath” you. You consider him/her a diamond in the rough. The person who stands before you today isn’t great but sure does have potential. Dating them feels like a project.
Consistently Dating Needs to Be Fixed People Could Mean: You’re an over-compensator and you often make excuses for something or for what someone has done. Therefore, you walk into most relationships with extreme patience and a toolkit, ready to fix everything. This trait mostly comes as a result of overcompensating for some error or mistake in your own life. In order to really prove yourself to be someone worth dating is to stop trying to make up for what you either missed out on or something you did in your past that’s done and over with.
The Commitment-Phobe
Description: He/She has a history of short relationships and may never have been married. He has several excuses why he hasn’t met the right woman. He/She has justified their history by saying he has plenty of time to settle down. One of their favorite lines is “someday.”
Consistently Dating Commitment-Phobes Could Mean: You’re needy. Being persistently needy, whether it’s emotionally or otherwise, means you’re going to attract men who feel the need to “rescue” a woman (but not necessarily commit to her). Being needy means you thrive on the attention you get from men, no matter how little or infrequent. This is commonly seen in people who had abrupt endings to past relationships. In order to meet a secure person wanting to commit, you have to be a secure person who upholds your “relationship vitals.”
The Parasite
Description: He/She gets helps, at your expense and assisting him often puts you in harm’s way. Neither you nor the relationship benefit from what he/she takes from you.
Consistently Dating Parasites Could Mean: You are insecure. Being insecure and having low self-esteem can attract needy and clingy men who use you. It’s important to have your self-esteem in order before you begin dating so that it sends a message to parasitic men that you don’t need them. I’m not asking you get all gangsta but you must assert yourself to show that you’re not a pushover either. People who are secure with themselves are less likely to attract a parasite.
The Bully
Description: He/She blames you for things that aren’t your fault. He/She talks to you like you are a child. They use an intimidating tone to others when asking for help. They criticizes your character and possibly even your children.
Consistently Dating Bullies Could Mean: You have problems maintaining emotional boundaries. You don’t instinctively know where to draw the lines of emotional responsibility between self and others. You seek to win over others by pleasing them or casting yourself in a favorable light, to your detriment. This boundary issue typically stems from carrying the burden of others’ emotions for which you aren’t responsible. When you become clear about where to take responsibility and where your emotional responsibility ends, you can better manage the boundaries.
The Pushover
Description: He/She will agree with anything you say. He/She has low self-esteem. He/She has no sense of self-confidence. He/She is unable to voice or argue opinions or desires.
Consistently Dating Pushovers Could Mean: You are a controlling person who tends to appear to have their stuff together. If you’re a controlling person, you easily attract (or should I say, go after and find) pushovers. These pushovers love you because they identify in you elements of maturity they don’t possess. Unfortunately, most of these pushovers never evolve and instead permanently take the role of “yes men/women.” It’s best, if you’re this type of person, to stay clear of pushovers and stay with more complimentary personalities.
The Taken
Description: He/She is married, engaged, or in a romantic relationship with someone other than you. Please note, if he/she is married but separated, it still means he/she is married.
Consistently Dating Taken People Could Mean: You have low self-esteem and no self-love. No matter the excuse, if you’re carrying on a “relationship” with someone who is in another relationship, you are exhibiting one of the lowest forms of self-love and self-respect. If you’re “dating” a cheater, you are in fact a cheater yourself and likely to be snide towards the people closest to you. Chances are, your family and friends have voiced concern over whom you’re involved with and as a result, your relationship with them has grown strained. While I don’t believe friends and family are the best relationship experts, if they all are telling you the same thing, listen!click to expand
Posted by thecrazyariestaurusYou have to understand a simple fact. You can't do anything against being cheated on. It's not your responsibility what others do. Living in a mental state of worrying about it unhealthy, makes you paranoid overtime especially if you re sensitive person. If you express your insecurity it magnet situation of infidelity. Work on yourself and understand your self worth, as those cheating on you are the losers. Individuals with decent moral code does not cheat. Period.
I'm really trying to understand why I've gotten cheated on in all my relationships, and why I seem to attract guys who secretly have girlfriends. It's always so dramatic. Wtf is it? Am I too detached? Am I just doomed? Am I just a really shitty person and I'm attracting people like me? Do I seem like a slut/home wrecker? Do I just have really bad judgement? Am I too insecure? what is it? Is it because I have malefic planets in my 5th house? Is it my 8th house placements? Idk. I'm just venting. I'm tired of venting to my friends. I'm always the only one in the group who gets fucked over, and I'm sick of it.
They think your nice and a push over. Men don't cheat on women they are scared of
Signed Up: Jan 27, 2012
Comments: 4343 · Posts: 13269 · Topics: 69
Comments: 4343 · Posts: 13269 · Topics: 69
Posted by Stensco21Lol
They think your nice and a push over. Men don't cheat on women they are scared of
Signed Up: Jan 27, 2012
Comments: 4343 · Posts: 13269 · Topics: 69
Comments: 4343 · Posts: 13269 · Topics: 69
Posted by thecrazyariestaurus
I'm really trying to understand why I've gotten cheated on in all my relationships, and why I seem to attract guys who secretly have girlfriends. It's always so dramatic. Wtf is it? Am I too detached? Am I just doomed? Am I just a really shitty person and I'm attracting people like me? Do I seem like a slut/home wrecker? Do I just have really bad judgement? Am I too insecure? what is it? Is it because I have malefic planets in my 5th house? Is it my 8th house placements? Idk. I'm just venting. I'm tired of venting to my friends. I'm always the only one in the group who gets fucked over, and I'm sick of it.
The Eternal Triangle by Liz Greene
A little astrology and psychology.... full text here:
http://www.skyscript.co.uk/lgreene.html
Posted by _ggYou doPosted by Senorita_LLWhaaat?! Seriously? I taught i was one of a kind. Stop lying, woman! I'd remember someone with a similar chart as mines. I don't remember youPosted by _ggFyzaGems. Do you remember that name?Posted by Senorita_LLI don't rememberPosted by _ggNope. It's either you're pretending like you don't remember me or maybe you don't.Posted by Senorita_LLCool are you new?Posted by _ggA Gemini with a Leo moon.Posted by Senorita_LLPosted by _ggAll you do is nothing but post negative comments.
I know a few women like you. Dated one , a leo with mercury venus. I always assume its past life stuff..like you ate babies or cheated old people out of their social security checks.
No offense but you do sound a bit detached and slow. Its probably bad judgement tho.
Good job Gemini!
Who are you?
I have no clue.
We have almost similar chart except that you're a Taurus rising. If I remember that correctly.click to expand
Posted by _ggBecause you do remember herPosted by HaruukaWhy do you say that?Posted by _ggYou doPosted by Senorita_LLWhaaat?! Seriously? I taught i was one of a kind. Stop lying, woman! I'd remember someone with a similar chart as mines. I don't remember youPosted by _ggFyzaGems. Do you remember that name?Posted by Senorita_LLI don't rememberPosted by _ggNope. It's either you're pretending like you don't remember me or maybe you don't.Posted by Senorita_LLCool are you new?Posted by _ggA Gemini with a Leo moon.Posted by Senorita_LLPosted by _ggAll you do is nothing but post negative comments.
I know a few women like you. Dated one , a leo with mercury venus. I always assume its past life stuff..like you ate babies or cheated old people out of their social security checks.
No offense but you do sound a bit detached and slow. Its probably bad judgement tho.
Good job Gemini!
Who are you?
I have no clue.
We have almost similar chart except that you're a Taurus rising. If I remember that correctly.click to expand
Posted by _ggI don’t knowPosted by HaruukaPosted by _ggBecause you do remember herPosted by HaruukaWhy do you say that?Posted by _ggYou doPosted by Senorita_LLWhaaat?! Seriously? I taught i was one of a kind. Stop lying, woman! I'd remember someone with a similar chart as mines. I don't remember youPosted by _ggFyzaGems. Do you remember that name?Posted by Senorita_LLI don't rememberPosted by _ggNope. It's either you're pretending like you don't remember me or maybe you don't.Posted by Senorita_LLCool are you new?Posted by _ggA Gemini with a Leo moon.Posted by Senorita_LLPosted by _ggAll you do is nothing but post negative comments.
I know a few women like you. Dated one , a leo with mercury venus. I always assume its past life stuff..like you ate babies or cheated old people out of their social security checks.
No offense but you do sound a bit detached and slow. Its probably bad judgement tho.
Good job Gemini!
Who are you?
I have no clue.
We have almost similar chart except that you're a Taurus rising. If I remember that correctly.
Wtf?! No i don't. What makes you think i do?click to expand
Posted by _ggWhy ?!Posted by HaruukaWeirdoPosted by _ggI don’t knowPosted by HaruukaPosted by _ggBecause you do remember herPosted by HaruukaWhy do you say that?Posted by _ggYou doPosted by Senorita_LLWhaaat?! Seriously? I taught i was one of a kind. Stop lying, woman! I'd remember someone with a similar chart as mines. I don't remember youPosted by _ggFyzaGems. Do you remember that name?Posted by Senorita_LLI don't rememberPosted by _ggNope. It's either you're pretending like you don't remember me or maybe you don't.Posted by Senorita_LLCool are you new?Posted by _ggA Gemini with a Leo moon.Posted by Senorita_LLPosted by _ggAll you do is nothing but post negative comments.
I know a few women like you. Dated one , a leo with mercury venus. I always assume its past life stuff..like you ate babies or cheated old people out of their social security checks.
No offense but you do sound a bit detached and slow. Its probably bad judgement tho.
Good job Gemini!
Who are you?
I have no clue.
We have almost similar chart except that you're a Taurus rising. If I remember that correctly.
Wtf?! No i don't. What makes you think i do?click to expand
Posted by _ggMmmm .. noPosted by HaruukaCuz you sounded so sure. Now you say you don't know. You just want my attentionPosted by _ggWhy ?!Posted by HaruukaWeirdoPosted by _ggI don’t knowPosted by HaruukaPosted by _ggBecause you do remember herPosted by HaruukaWhy do you say that?Posted by _ggYou doPosted by Senorita_LLWhaaat?! Seriously? I taught i was one of a kind. Stop lying, woman! I'd remember someone with a similar chart as mines. I don't remember youPosted by _ggFyzaGems. Do you remember that name?Posted by Senorita_LLI don't rememberPosted by _ggNope. It's either you're pretending like you don't remember me or maybe you don't.Posted by Senorita_LLCool are you new?Posted by _ggA Gemini with a Leo moon.Posted by Senorita_LLPosted by _ggAll you do is nothing but post negative comments.
I know a few women like you. Dated one , a leo with mercury venus. I always assume its past life stuff..like you ate babies or cheated old people out of their social security checks.
No offense but you do sound a bit detached and slow. Its probably bad judgement tho.
Good job Gemini!
Who are you?
I have no clue.
We have almost similar chart except that you're a Taurus rising. If I remember that correctly.
Wtf?! No i don't. What makes you think i do?click to expand
I really think that you remember Fyza, I mean how can you forget her? It’s just wierd that you forget about her, and that’s it
Posted by CvurkooLifePosted by SheeverWhere did you get your psychology degree from?Posted by LeowwwwwNarcissism can not be healed.they screw up their own and others life. They are pathologically hard wired and no hope to change. They lack emphaty,tgat condition develop early childhood and stop the individual to grow in healthy way. They develop a false self which mimic emotions and protect their inner child as they hate themselves and everyone else. In relationsip they do not reciprocate, can't love because have no understanding what it's feel like. In short, hopelessPosted by thecrazyariestaurusAll? Ouch. Horrible.
I'm really trying to understand why I've gotten cheated on in all my relationships, and why I seem to attract guys who secretly have girlfriends.
Here's what I found... It's interesting.
https://www.google.ca/amp/www.paulcbrunson.com/blog/2013/07/31/dating-the-same-type-of-person-says-a-lot-about-you/amp/
Patterns:
The Narcissist
Description: His/Her charm, talent, success, beauty and charisma cast a spell on you and everyone around. His/Her conversation is scintillating! Once hooked, however, you battle with their demands, criticisms and self-centeredness.
Consistently Dating Narcissists Could Mean: You are also narcissistic. If you’re a narcissist, the common misconception is that you love you some you. Actually, you dislike yourself immensely. Your inflated self-flattery, perfectionism, and arrogance are merely covers for the self-loathing you don’t admit—usually even to yourself. Narcissists often attract and it’s very dangerous: They’ll need each other one minute and fight the next over whose needs come first. Narcissism can be healed with courage, time and a commitment to yourself.
The Emotionally Unavailable
Description: He/She doesn’t eagerly show up for you. They are full of excuses and indecisive. He/She talks about the past a lot. They are quick to claim they like you but he’s/she’s not looking for a committed relationship for whatever reasons.
Consistently Dating Emotionally Unavailable People Could Mean: You don’t feel deserving. Not feeling worthy typically originates because someone significant failed to stand up for you earlier in life. Someone essential to supporting your life wasn’t there, or was abusive, or was neglectful. As a result, you came away with a deep-down feeling that you are not worthy. To correct this trait, it is important to begin by confronting (and often forgiving) the person who originally failed you.
The Needs to Be Fixed
Description: He/She feels “beneath” you. You consider him/her a diamond in the rough. The person who stands before you today isn’t great but sure does have potential. Dating them feels like a project.
Consistently Dating Needs to Be Fixed People Could Mean: You’re an over-compensator and you often make excuses for something or for what someone has done. Therefore, you walk into most relationships with extreme patience and a toolkit, ready to fix everything. This trait mostly comes as a result of overcompensating for some error or mistake in your own life. In order to really prove yourself to be someone worth dating is to stop trying to make up for what you either missed out on or something you did in your past that’s done and over with.
The Commitment-Phobe
Description: He/She has a history of short relationships and may never have been married. He has several excuses why he hasn’t met the right woman. He/She has justified their history by saying he has plenty of time to settle down. One of their favorite lines is “someday.”
Consistently Dating Commitment-Phobes Could Mean: You’re needy. Being persistently needy, whether it’s emotionally or otherwise, means you’re going to attract men who feel the need to “rescue” a woman (but not necessarily commit to her). Being needy means you thrive on the attention you get from men, no matter how little or infrequent. This is commonly seen in people who had abrupt endings to past relationships. In order to meet a secure person wanting to commit, you have to be a secure person who upholds your “relationship vitals.”
The Parasite
Description: He/She gets helps, at your expense and assisting him often puts you in harm’s way. Neither you nor the relationship benefit from what he/she takes from you.
Consistently Dating Parasites Could Mean: You are insecure. Being insecure and having low self-esteem can attract needy and clingy men who use you. It’s important to have your self-esteem in order before you begin dating so that it sends a message to parasitic men that you don’t need them. I’m not asking you get all gangsta but you must assert yourself to show that you’re not a pushover either. People who are secure with themselves are less likely to attract a parasite.
The Bully
Description: He/She blames you for things that aren’t your fault. He/She talks to you like you are a child. They use an intimidating tone to others when asking for help. They criticizes your character and possibly even your children.
Consistently Dating Bullies Could Mean: You have problems maintaining emotional boundaries. You don’t instinctively know where to draw the lines of emotional responsibility between self and others. You seek to win over others by pleasing them or casting yourself in a favorable light, to your detriment. This boundary issue typically stems from carrying the burden of others’ emotions for which you aren’t responsible. When you become clear about where to take responsibility and where your emotional responsibility ends, you can better manage the boundaries.
The Pushover
Description: He/She will agree with anything you say. He/She has low self-esteem. He/She has no sense of self-confidence. He/She is unable to voice or argue opinions or desires.
Consistently Dating Pushovers Could Mean: You are a controlling person who tends to appear to have their stuff together. If you’re a controlling person, you easily attract (or should I say, go after and find) pushovers. These pushovers love you because they identify in you elements of maturity they don’t possess. Unfortunately, most of these pushovers never evolve and instead permanently take the role of “yes men/women.” It’s best, if you’re this type of person, to stay clear of pushovers and stay with more complimentary personalities.
The Taken
Description: He/She is married, engaged, or in a romantic relationship with someone other than you. Please note, if he/she is married but separated, it still means he/she is married.
Consistently Dating Taken People Could Mean: You have low self-esteem and no self-love. No matter the excuse, if you’re carrying on a “relationship” with someone who is in another relationship, you are exhibiting one of the lowest forms of self-love and self-respect. If you’re “dating” a cheater, you are in fact a cheater yourself and likely to be snide towards the people closest to you. Chances are, your family and friends have voiced concern over whom you’re involved with and as a result, your relationship with them has grown strained. While I don’t believe friends and family are the best relationship experts, if they all are telling you the same thing, listen!click to expand
I did months of research on that particular due personal experience. Just type as does narcissist change or able to change? And see psychological articles and studies.
What's the difference between the spectrum, malignant, cover, Borderline (cluster b) psychopath, sociopath etc
The given link absolute nonsense. Narcs like to target empathic individuals. And codependent hook to narcissist from the two points of perspective in majority of cases.
Posted by _ggYeah she was with another name for a while 😅Posted by HaruukaDid she go by a different username?Posted by _ggMmmm .. noPosted by HaruukaCuz you sounded so sure. Now you say you don't know. You just want my attentionPosted by _ggWhy ?!Posted by HaruukaWeirdoPosted by _ggI don’t knowPosted by HaruukaPosted by _ggBecause you do remember herPosted by HaruukaWhy do you say that?Posted by _ggYou doPosted by Senorita_LLWhaaat?! Seriously? I taught i was one of a kind. Stop lying, woman! I'd remember someone with a similar chart as mines. I don't remember youPosted by _ggFyzaGems. Do you remember that name?Posted by Senorita_LLI don't rememberPosted by _ggNope. It's either you're pretending like you don't remember me or maybe you don't.Posted by Senorita_LLCool are you new?Posted by _ggA Gemini with a Leo moon.Posted by Senorita_LLPosted by _ggAll you do is nothing but post negative comments.
I know a few women like you. Dated one , a leo with mercury venus. I always assume its past life stuff..like you ate babies or cheated old people out of their social security checks.
No offense but you do sound a bit detached and slow. Its probably bad judgement tho.
Good job Gemini!
Who are you?
I have no clue.
We have almost similar chart except that you're a Taurus rising. If I remember that correctly.
Wtf?! No i don't. What makes you think i do?
I really think that you remember Fyza, I mean how can you forget her? It’s just wierd that you forget about her, and that’s itclick to expand
Maybe that’s why you forget .
Posted by crazysiouxEcstasy??Posted by SheeverActually, there's been some recent breakthroughs on this. In the UK, of all places. They've experimented treating NPD with an interesting combination of (and you're gonna flip because I sure as fuck did) Cognitive Behavioral Therapy and carefully controlled doses of MDMA (i.e. Ecstasy) ...
Narcissism can not be healed.they screw up their own and others life. They are pathologically hard wired and no hope to change. They lack emphaty,tgat condition develop early childhood and stop the individual to grow in healthy way. They develop a false self which mimic emotions and protect their inner child as they hate themselves and everyone else. In relationsip they do not reciprocate, can't love because have no understanding what it's feel like. In short, hopeless
I don't know what to think of it myself ...
click to expand
)) hmm. As far as I know, only the condition of borderline can improve (their disorder based on the PTSD) the other spectrum full blown npd has no hope because the early trauma/s plus Already genetic base create a long standing condition modify the entire personality What is striking to me is that, sociopath the most capable of cooperation because they cognitive functioning is high and they go for a long run by constantly adapt. Often not fully recognised for years although showing narcissistic traits more easily overlooked their behaviour by their partner. Covert and malignant is extremely destructive especially self destructive. They have short relationships, full of drama and chaos.
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