Women debunked!

Ladies, am I right?!

1. Guys, you oughta know that you're REALLY in trouble when your girlfriend is dead silent during an argument or during a time when she feels very disrespected. If she's actually not saying anything, RUN!!!

2. Guys, if she says "It's fine," after you just cancelled on her/stood her up, NO she's NOT fine!

3. Yes, we'd prefer a hand-written card from you over some Hallmark card that's filled with writing from someone ELSE'S mind/thoughts. We love Hallmark too, but we'll met even quicker if you made the effort to write it yourself! Animations and all =)

4. Yes, we know that you'd prefer us to be "natural" but dammit, we like those fake nails, fake hair, push up bras & enhancers so shut up! You don't see us complaining about your Rogaine, or steroid muscles! And yes, we know when you've put a sock in your underwear to make your mandingo look bigger! We know it's not really "that big" but hey, you don't see us complaining & saying, "I liked ya better when you were small" or "I liked you better when you were balding!" Give us a break!

5. She wants you to like her friends, but she does NOT want you to lust over her friends when they're around! If you've blurted out that her best friend is super hot more than once (even if you're saying this to other guys), don't be surprised if you don't get any "nooky" that night =)

6. YES, we use AND love our intuitions. Even the love of her life won't/can't change that. You're better off falling in love with BOTH of us (us & our intuitions) b/c they're a package deal!

7. You're not the only guy whose name we've ever screamed in bed. So please quit asking us each time after sex if you're the best! That's a trick question! If she tells you the truth about your "ranking" you'll probably cry & dump her! But if she lies, atleast give her credit for protecting your feelings/ego

8. Women dress nicely & try more to impress other women moreso than men. We want you fellas to notice us too BUT we know that women pay more attention to detail & it'd crush us if other women considered us just "average" when we thought we were smokin hot!

9. When she asks you, "If you ever did cheat on me behind my back, would you tell me?" guys, that's a TRICK question! Don't answer it! FAIL!

10. She probably masturbates & thinks about sex more than you do

11. Guys, you're not the only ones who imagine what sex would be like when 1st laying eyes on someone!

12. If she calls you, hangs up on you, calls you right back & then hangs up on you again, DON'T actually believe her when she yells "Leave me alone!" to you! Even worse, if she keeps answering your calls & yet says "I don't want to talk to you" she's lying. She keeps answering b/c she absolutely DOES want to talk to you!

13. If she says, "I'll be ok," while crying her eyes out, don't actually believe her & walk away! NO! That's code for PLEASE DON'T GO! Stay here & comfort me!

14. Guys, if she asks you, "What does SHE (the other woman) have that I don't have?" Don't actually answer that question! It's a set up!

15. Yes, atleast 2 of her friends know how big/small your slinger is 30 minutes after she F'd you for the 1st time! Oh gosh, if the sex was really good, she'll crack & tell SOMEONE!

16. Guys, every time you piss her off or betray her, YES atleast 5 of her girlfriends know all about it & are coaching her about how much of a douche you are!

17. If she says, "Oh just forget it!" NO please don't forget it!

18. By the time she's finally went through your phone/stuff, trust me she resents both you AND herself for doing it. Especially herself if she doesn't find anything incriminating.

19. If she's got hair weave, NO she's not ok anymore with you randomly weaving your hands through her hair! She'd have a full blown heart attack if you accidentally pulled some of it out!

20. If she grabs your crotch on the 1st date, yep, you're probably gonna get laid!

21. She's probably ok with you having a 3-some with her & someone else. What she's NOT ok with & is afraid of is you wanting seconds!

22. If she says, "Oh I didn't know you were also friends with (such & such) on Facebook?" YES that means she's watching your every move so be careful!

23. When after an argument/breakup she says, "You'll NEVER find a girl like me!" she's expecting for you to agree. She's crushed when you say "Well that was the point! I'm absolutely hoping that I DON'T ever find another crazy loony chick like you!"

24. If you just met her & if she's willing to stay the night with you & damn near strip down to nothing but her undies, YES she's testing you & playing mind games with you if she all of the sudden gets mad when you try to touch her or iniate sex! She knows EXACTLY what she's doing!

25. She doesn't wanna hear about how you think weddings & the costs of them are over-rated and/or ridiculous. She wants the biggest & best wedding of all time, ok?! DEAL WITH IT & LIKE IT! =P

26. If she leaves her toothbrush, shampoo & favorite bracelet at your place, YEP she wants to be with you. If that's NOT what you want, make sure you immediately remind her that she left her stuff & tell her to come get it! She'll get the hint

27. Women love being able to throw it back in your face & say, "You lead me on!" Ugh & we hate it when you say, "You can't be mad. I told you from the beginning that I wasn't ready." Hearing those words is DEATH!

28. When she screams, "Omg, I hate you & I hope you die! I never want to see you again!" That's code for "I'm just mad right now, but don't worry, I'll call you in the morning" =)

29. NO, she's really not "over it" the next day. She's just pretending like she is to keep the peace & to hold onto you Mr. "I hate arguining." Trust me, she'll bring it up again!

30. She knew you were gonna/about to cheat probably before you did! Women are naturally trained detectives & psychics.

31. She's pissed when you conveinantly disappear around the time her monthly period comes.

32. She'll wait until she's ultimately pissed off to the max before finally telling you that you've got the smallest slinger she's ever seen! Wanna know how she REALLY feels about your slinger size? Wait until she's the most mad at you! Trust me, she won't be able to hold it in forever!

33. When we say want/like a "sensitive man" we don't actually mean 1 who cries more than we do! Sheeeesh! If you've cried during more chick flicks than she has, she'll start regretting that she typed in "looking for sensitive male" on Match.com

34. She gets offended when you keep talking about/staring at her boobs & butt, but deep down she's ecstatic that you're so fond of them! If you'll notice...the more you keep bragging about certain body parts, the more she'll wear things to reveal that specific part. She's not dumb enough to start hiding the main thing that keeps you physically/sexually attracted to her!

35. If she never wants to have sex with the lights on or even slightly dimmed, YEP she's as insecure as it gets!

36. If she asks you to go somewhere with her, especially after complaining about how no one else wants to or will go, you better F'ing go! She's secretely TELLING you (not asking you) to go!

37. YES, she's hoping that you noticed all 7 different shades of eyeshadow pigment she wore to match her outfit & accessories today!

38. If NO tears are actually coming out when she's crying, she's either playing you for a fool (acting) OR she's about to snap! (Refer to #1)

39. She loses ALL respect for you when you expect to have raw sex AND cum inside of her but yet say, "I don't really want or can afford to have any kids right now." That odd look she gives you is code for, "Oh & btw, if I get pregnant, I hope you know that I AM keeping the baby!"

40. Women give men the false impression that once we're hurt, we'll have the hardest time moving on. NOPE, not true. The min. she finds someone that she considers to be "better" than you, she'll forget about you. (Guys, stop thinking that you're the only 1s who know how to get under a new 1 in order to get over the last 1)

41. She's secretely devestated when even you won't kill that spider/bug. In situations where she's expecting you to be "the man" you better be the man dammit!

42. Stop telling us how ridiculous we are for being willing to wait in the salon or nail shop for 5 hours! We're trying to get "beauti-fied" for you so shut up & like it!

43. Wanna see her true colors & find out just how clingy, controlling, crazy, insecure and/or possessive she is? Simple. Don't call her for 3 days straight. If she doesn't flip out, she's all good. But if you've got 33 missed calls, 32 voicemails & a "F U!" status addressed to you on FB, there's your answer!

44. Don't EVER EVER EVER introduce her as just "your friend" to your buddies or to others if you know good & damn well that you've been calling her your "girlfriend" behind closed doors and/or when it's just the 2 of you! It'll crush her! If she's your fiance, you better introduce her as such! She'll be terribly offended if you're still referring to her as your "girlfriend" 5 years into the engagement! Women are very anal/serious about titles!

45. Any/everything she says BEFORE the word "but" is bullshxt! For instance, "I'm really not all that upset BUT I was really hurt that you kept staring at other females tonight..." She's REALLY saying, "YES, I am absolutely upset! I just don't want you to know just how much you really affect me, you bastard!"

Posted by krysrenee7
1. Guys, you oughta know that you're REALLY in trouble when your girlfriend is dead silent during an argument or during a time when she feels very disrespected. If she's actually not saying anything, RUN!!!

2. Guys, if she says "It's fine," after you just cancelled on her/stood her up, NO she's NOT fine!

3. Yes, we'd prefer a hand-written card from you over some Hallmark card that's filled with writing from someone ELSE'S mind/thoughts. We love Hallmark too, but we'll met even quicker if you made the effort to write it yourself! Animations and all =)

4. Yes, we know that you'd prefer us to be "natural" but dammit, we like those fake nails, fake hair, push up bras & enhancers so shut up! You don't see us complaining about your Rogaine, or steroid muscles! And yes, we know when you've put a sock in your underwear to make your mandingo look bigger! We know it's not really "that big" but hey, you don't see us complaining & saying, "I liked ya better when you were small" or "I liked you better when you were balding!" Give us a break!

5. She wants you to like her friends, but she does NOT want you to lust over her friends when they're around! If you've blurted out that her best friend is super hot more than once (even if you're saying this to other guys), don't be surprised if you don't get any "nooky" that night =)

7. You're not the only guy whose name we've ever screamed in bed. So please quit asking us each time after sex if you're the best! That's a trick question! If she tells you the truth about your "ranking" you'll probably cry & dump her! But if she lies, atleast give her credit for protecting your feelings/ego

9. When she asks you, "If you ever did cheat on me behind my back, would you tell me?" guys, that's a TRICK question! Don't answer it! FAIL!

10. She probably masturbates & thinks about sex more than you do

11. Guys, you're not the only ones who imagine what sex would be like when 1st laying eyes on someone!

All true. Esp the first two. I do NOT need space unless I ASK for it. I'm just seething if I don't talk to you.

You BETTER not think my best friend is hot. If you say it once, its polite. Beyond that? We are going to be having some issues.

Hallmark.. depends on what you say. If its really stupid like "Your Hot" (spelling intentional) um, nope. Rather have Hallmark. If its actually had some time and th

thought and feeling put into it, hell to the yes! WAY better than Hallmark!

Omg asking if you're the best I've had is SO annoying. I can't answer unless you sucked. Orgasm feels the same every time, and I lose count of how many times (each time I have sex) so thats the only other thing I could base it on. 'Course if you sucked and you ask, be prepared for the truth. I don't mince words.

12, 13, 14, TRUE.

15.. maybe. Depends if my friend already knows about him. If she's never heard I'm seeing someone, the first thing I say isn't going to be: 'he rocked my world in bed'.

16. Hell yes.

17, 18, 20, yes. 21 Hell yes. I'm pretty okay with three somes. Once.

24.. no. I strip first day I meet you? I want to get laid.

27, 28, 29, yep.

33 YES. Eww.

34. haha Krys, quit giving away all our secrets 😛 Yep, definitely.

36, 37, 38 yes.

39.. I LIKE that kind of sex.. and its not really an issue anyway because I'd be taking something.

41. lol yep!

43, 44, 45. Yes. If you introduce me as anything less than you say I am to my face alone, we are so done. I WILL walk away from you right in front of your friends.

"3. Yes, we'd prefer a hand-written card from you over some Hallmark card that's filled with writing from someone ELSE'S mind/thoughts. We love Hallmark too, but we'll met even quicker if you made the effort to write it yourself! Animations and all =)"

This rings true for me. It does not have to be a card persay, I once had a guy make me a "bug" out of a cotton ball. He "built" it from what ever was laying around at the moment and he put it in a little plastic bubble (like the ones you get from a bubble gum machine" and placed it on my desk. (yes K7...he was an Aqua 😛)

#4. Im all for aesthetically pleaseing...nothing wrong with wanting to keep ones self healthy, however, this lady likes to keep it au natural 😛 I wish more men/women would just play up/enhance what they already have. NOTHING is sexier than being confident with who you are and what you already have.

#8. See above. Besides, why compare yourself to anybody else. That just SCREAMS insecurity and is a turn off. Everyone is unique in their own way. If you are constantly comparing yourself or someone else to another/others, how are you ever gonna know what is standiing right in front of you? And most importantly, how will you know your OWN worth if you are comparing yourself to another? *shakes head*

#23 Meh......if the shoe fits

#27 If he was honest in the beginning and she STILL continued to ignore what was obvious, circle gets the square!

#41. I like animals...please don't harm them around me just shoo them out the door/window (unless its a cochroach)

#43. Stage 5 cling on

#44. If a title shall be bestowed upon me, then "Friend" is the only one I want. Also, my name will work just as well. I don't need to have the title of "girlfriend" to know that I'm someones G/F.

I especially remind guys to remember #43!!! There's kind of no ifs-ands-or-buts. If the chick calls you all the names in the book all b/c you didn't call her in 3 days (valid excuse or not), that'll be the BEST AND QUICKEST way to see her true colors early on! Nooooo, don't wait until you're 2 years in to discover that she's a manic depressed & bipolar chick who contemplates poisoning you every time you leave & need "me time!"

#1, 2, 12, 13, 14, 17, 22, 27, 28, 29, and 45 can all be solved with one simple expression. Say what you mean and mean what you say. If you get pissed about your guy forgetting something and heading out with a friend, and you tell him everything is fine... don't be angry when he goes out. If you ask me something you can bet that I'll give an honest answer (or make it very obvious I'm teasing you).

Secret (not really) about guys...
23. When after an argument/breakup she says, "You'll NEVER find a girl like me!" she's expecting for you to agree. She's crushed when you say "Well that was the point! I'm absolutely hoping that I DON'T ever find another crazy loony chick like you!"
We know, that's why we say it.

Posted by krysrenee7
15. Yes, atleast 2 of her friends know how big/small your slinger is 30 minutes after she F'd you for the 1st time! Oh gosh, if the sex was really good, she'll crack & tell SOMEONE!

16. Guys, every time you piss her off or betray her, YES atleast 5 of her girlfriends know all about it & are coaching her about how much of a douche you are!

So you tell 2 gfs when we rock your world and 5 when we make a fool of ourselves? No wonder your friends are always telling you I'm a jerk, that's what you tell them.

Posted by krysrenee7
42. Stop telling us how ridiculous we are for being willing to wait in the salon or nail shop for 5 hours! We're trying to get "beauti-fied" for you so shut up & like it!

We do appreciate it but it is still ridiculous. The best you ever looked was when we woke up together. You were laid up real tight against me with an arm draped across my chest. No make up left, hair wild, and you just smiled.

"We do appreciate it but it is still ridiculous. The best you ever looked was when we woke up together. You were laid up real tight against me with an arm draped across my chest. No make up left, hair wild, and you just smiled."

That was most excellent.

"We do appreciate it but it is still ridiculous. The best you ever looked was when we woke up together. You were laid up real tight against me with an arm draped across my chest. No make up left, hair wild, and you just smiled."

I believe this whole-heartedly, BUT alot of women don't. Plus, it's no secret that lots of men claim they like women go are "all natural" but yet every time you see those guys, they're always drooling over the women who are the opposite! They say they hate anything "added on" but yet these very same guys are probably dating Heidi Spencer (Montag)!

It's kind of hard for women to believe that men really do like "natural" if every time they look around, there's yet another guy whose drooling over the chick with the fake boobs, the push up bra, the long hair weave, the pushup bra & the chick who looks F'ing amazing b/c of her face lift 2 years ago! Women follow the trends! They base how they present themselves on what they see other guys drooling over.

Some man said, "sex sells" & BOOM! Next thing you know, even 8 year olds started walking around damn near half naked in the summer time. We blaim it on the guys =P