Worst One Night Stand Stories, DXP Edition

Posted by cheekyfaerie
Not a one night stand, but worth an honorable mention?


One summer, my brother was working night guard for a Red Roof Inn. He'd met a girl at the mall or whatever and told her where he'd be working and she should come by and he'd take her in all the places people weren't allowed to go. Yeah, I know, but we're talking 80's here so bare with me.


Anyway, I'm pretty sure this was *supposed* to be a hook up or at least a cheeky make out sesh. Said he was sitting in a chair, with her in his lap... lights off... kissing. Next thing ya know, she starts acting all weird. She wants to leave and he's trying to get her to stay. She kinda backs away and leaves abruptly. It was then he realized he felt something on his pants. She'd bled all over him.

Posted by Explicit
OMG. I have a HORRIFIC story from my pretending to be straight days. It's awful. I actually came out right after it happened because I was like, "OK, I can't do this forever." I left the girls house, went to my friends house and came out after that horrific experience. Then went home and came out to everybody else. THAT'S HOW BAD IT WAS.

Posted by cheekyfaerie
Oh! I got one. First time I ever stayed over at Mr. Sagman's for a hang n bang.


So I went to see him and we went to a show, followed by more drinking. Turned out he drinks a *lot* and I was pacing him so, big mistake. We get back to his and as soon as I laid down, I felt it. Nope. Gotta go. Run to the bathroom and ralph. Was pretty much a one and done and I felt much better, but when I went to flush, it wouldn't go down.


Again. It wouldn't go down.


He asks me if I'm ok and says his toilet doesn't really flush very well. We stood there and flushed it about three more times, just watching my vomit swirl around the bowl. We bonded instantly and I never shat at his house until he moved.

Posted by andstrollbot

Posted by Faiyaz
I hide because it wasn't bad.


Once though, I met a marine at a country bar who danced all night. He took me and my gf to WAFFLEHOUSE after the bara closed... and proceeded to try and fuck.


During our meal, (I got chicken chunks off the child menu) when he started to behave aggressive. So I told him he was a pussy. And if he was a man, he would eat my chewed up food out of my mouth



...


And I kid you not, I spit the chewed up chicken chunks i chewed, into his mouth and he ate them!



I called a cab from the bathroom and walked by the table while grabbing my friend saying, "momma bird thinks you're desperate"




We both made it home unfucked. But it can happen to anyone. Gotta be smart.

for awhile you had me convinced you were a sane saggie

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