Sag & Scorpio: Platonic Love?

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FUMRedFairy_tales
@FUMRedFairy_tales
16 Years1,000+ Posts

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Do we really 'hear' each others words or what is happening?

I will call him 'MY Sag man'. He is not, but it is almost getting to 5 years of a mysterious relationship we are both anticipating. The chemistry is undeniable. But do we talk the same language?

He wants sex. I want friendship first.

I DON'T WANT casual sex!

Doesn't this seem clear within ONE sentence of what we want from each other?

He doesn't give me what I want.
I don't give him what he wants.

We both are stuck in a wheel train like the movie "Groundhog Day"!

The same repeats and repeats and repeats... There are different little scenarios each time. Each time, I hope he understands me. We get close. He makes an effort. But oh why do we end up with same result— He says something that pisses me off. I feel misunderstood. Then we get this period of silence. Each time I think, "IT IS OVER NOW!". But then it starts again. We both are stuck in the wheels of time. Same Day... with love for each other, that we cannot express.

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FUM
@FUM
15 Years1,000+ Posts

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back to 'my sag'.

sigh

He thinks, because I'm older than him, I shouldn't be worried of being taken seriously. He says, I have more life exprience than him.

What does that mean?

Just because he is younger than me, nevermind 34,... which is not necessarily a super spring chicken himself, does he think he deserves a committed partner with kids and house, etc., but I do not??


Why shouldn't I be taken seriously? I have feelings. I have my standards. Of course, like any other woman, I also want the man I love NOT to hide me and to feel proud of my presence, friendship and all.
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scorpdiva
@scorpdiva
15 Years1,000+ Posts

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fum, it is always a battle with this pair I am going through this same situation right now, I love my sagg with all my heart however like you stated it's the back and forth, we think we understand each other and on the same page them someone get pissed off we don't speak for a while the once again make up with hopes that things will work out the next time. it's CRAZY, but you have to do what's best for you, I am a scorp also but 5years is way to long for me, it's been 2 years for me on this ride but unfortunately I might have to get off soon it's too many fish in the sea and they all seem to be chasing me right now.
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FUM
@FUM
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SagChick -- to me, yes there is. To him .. all I know is he kept bouncing back. Eventhough I refused to meet him for 2 years... his insisting emails didn't stop. He used to email me few times a week. This can't be only about the chase, i think, could it?


Tackyy -- that's the same guy.

ScorpDiva -- interesting you have similar experience. Every time I tell myself I will not talk to him again or respond to his emails, but I forget over time and find myself responding. He blocked me off his FB for some jealousy reason. I think he thought I went with some guy to some trip. He made some lame excuse and blocked me. Then two weeks later, he asked again if we could meet. I said, no. Then a month later he asked again and for the past number of weeks we are back and forth every day until he responded with some weird comment. I wrote him back saying, 'nevermind'. Now he is laughing at me: LOL



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SagChick411
@SagChick411
13 Years1,000+ Posts

Comments: 46 · Posts: 1157 · Topics: 46
Posted by FUM
SagChick -- to me, yes there is. To him .. all I know is he kept bouncing back. Eventhough I refused to meet him for 2 years... his insisting emails didn't stop. He used to email me few times a week. This can't be only about the chase, i think, could it?




I don't think it's just about the 'chase' atal. He clearly likes you but maybe isn't taking how you feel about him seriously? Sags love to joke around and stuff so if you two have got great banter anyway and then you tell him how you feel he may think you're just saying it.

Sagis generally (from what I know) don't really talk of 'real' feelings. I guess the men are worse in that way as they try and protect themselves by making everything lighthearted. It can come across as not being serious (ESPECIALLY to a Scorp who takes everything seriously more or less)

From my experience there is NO way a Sag man will chase for that long if he genuinely didn't have deeper feelings for you.
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scorpdiva
@scorpdiva
15 Years1,000+ Posts

Comments: 9 · Posts: 1333 · Topics: 76
Posted by SagChick411
Posted by FUM
SagChick -- to me, yes there is. To him .. all I know is he kept bouncing back. Eventhough I refused to meet him for 2 years... his insisting emails didn't stop. He used to email me few times a week. This can't be only about the chase, i think, could it?




I don't think it's just about the 'chase' atal. He clearly likes you but maybe isn't taking how you feel about him seriously? Sags love to joke around and stuff so if you two have got great banter anyway and then you tell him how you feel he may think you're just saying it.

Sagis generally (from what I know) don't really talk of 'real' feelings. I guess the men are worse in that way as they try and protect themselves by making everything lighthearted. It can come across as not being serious (ESPECIALLY to a Scorp who takes everything seriously more or less)

From my experience there is NO way a Sag man will chase for that long if he genuinely didn't have deeper feelings for you.
click to expand




Good points, sometimes you want to be serious and have a real conversation, I love to joke around too but not just all time which sagg me like to do when it comes to expressing their real feelings.
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DMV
@DMV
15 Years25,000+ PostsSagittarius

Comments: 295 · Posts: 28989 · Topics: 654
DAMMIT FUM!

are we living identical lives—? i relate to alot of what you said. one word. MISUNDERSTANDINGS!

just when you think youve figured each other out BAM ZOOM POW right in the kisser. square one? naw, never that. your progressing, just at a slow pace. ive mentioned to a few other people, you must be willing to take the road less traveled and try a new approach... eh?

as a frightful scorpio moon dealing with an unstable and intimidating scorpio man, he is undoubtedly my equal. but that doesnt mean i like his stankin ass all the time. ive considered bodily harm many times, but they would make me take my weave out in jail. NO DEAL!

anyways. i find him to be intimidating at times. such a 8 ball. do i talk to him? do i not? what do i talk to him about? am i just another girl whose completely wrapped up in him. im probably not the only one trying to be the only one (thanks Drake). but i promised myself, that i would be the one to give him the best ride of his life, for worse or better. lets see how crazy this mofo can really get. i want tears dammit! plus maybe something else...

you stated yourself, you cant turn away. so why should you? damn you Drake and your catchy ass verses...YOLO..you only live once.
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luckystar007
@luckystar007
13 Years500+ Posts

Comments: 2 · Posts: 690 · Topics: 31
Posted by SagChick411
Posted by FUM
SagChick -- to me, yes there is. To him .. all I know is he kept bouncing back. Eventhough I refused to meet him for 2 years... his insisting emails didn't stop. He used to email me few times a week. This can't be only about the chase, i think, could it?




I don't think it's just about the 'chase' atal. He clearly likes you but maybe isn't taking how you feel about him seriously? Sags love to joke around and stuff so if you two have got great banter anyway and then you tell him how you feel he may think you're just saying it.

Sagis generally (from what I know) don't really talk of 'real' feelings. I guess the men are worse in that way as they try and protect themselves by making everything lighthearted. It can come across as not being serious (ESPECIALLY to a Scorp who takes everything seriously more or less)

From my experience there is NO way a Sag man will chase for that long if he genuinely didn't have deeper feelings for you.
click to expand




I just agree HALF with SagChick🙂 As Sag, we know that we don't really talk of 'real' feelings because we would not like to bother others...we just prefer making others laugh 😉

@FUM
Sags are always good at "speed" for everything---if a Sag man really loves you (i.e. you WON his heart), then he would not like to wait for you for so long...he would propose you in a short time. Otherwise, he just play game with you because you haven't given him all what he wants...so he thinks you are very interesting to play with...

Here is my experience with my Sag husband. We met & talked online about 3 months, then he visited me (we lived in different countries with 12 hours flight), we felt like old friends when we first met in person, on the 3rd day, he proposed...and we got married after one week (NO sex before we married). See the "speed"?

After we lived together, we started fighting for many things, when I got angry, I told him I wanted to "divorce"...but he always said he didn't want to give up on me... this is another long story.

Just want to show you how a Sag man acts when he really loves you......just easily watch his "speed" of his actions.

If you don't want to be hurt, then you should cut him off...he is not the one for you obviously (I think you knew it).

By the way, I am also Sag. I
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clunkclickeverytrip
@clunkclickeverytrip
14 Years

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I say I say I say, what do we have here then !
I do see those horsies getting all flustered with those stingy pincer folk, sometimes because they're wrong, sometimes because they do the ol' dishy out no takey back like !
But you, little cat lady are right, both these signs are so so sensitive !! They need nurture, watering daily and preening...the occasional pruning and lots ove love and light ! Maybe even a cool and breezy air to blow away those cobbywebs !
You're very wise for a little bird-flipping kitty, you done well !!


Ooohh the ribbon really matches that little bow atop your bonce !! 😄
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luckystar007
@luckystar007
13 Years500+ Posts

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Posted by clunkclickeverytrip

But you, little cat lady are right, both these signs are so so sensitive !! They need nurture, watering daily and preening...the occasional pruning and lots ove love and light ! Maybe even a cool and breezy air to blow away those cobbywebs !




You are such a sweet-talker 😉

But not BOTH signs.......just Scorps are super sensitive & controlling!!! Sags don't need that kind of "nurture" as you said... we just need space & freedom above all!!! And Sags are happiest people in this world because we are the most "optimistic" out of 12 signs 🙂
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happykitsune
@happykitsune
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Posted by luckystar007
Posted by clunkclickeverytrip

But you, little cat lady are right, both these signs are so so sensitive !! They need nurture, watering daily and preening...the occasional pruning and lots ove love and light ! Maybe even a cool and breezy air to blow away those cobbywebs !




You are such a sweet-talker 😉

But not BOTH signs.......just Scorps are super sensitive & controlling!!! Sags don't need that kind of "nurture" as you said... we just need space & freedom above all!!! And Sags are happiest people in this world because we are the most "optimistic" out of 12 signs 🙂
click to expand




Hit the nail on the head there, lucky. And scorpios being so sensitive is what can make them and sag so incompatible.
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luckystar007
@luckystar007
13 Years500+ Posts

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Posted by everevolvingepithet
I guess it helps to shine a light on such subjects though, it gives an insight or look-in to the fascinating world of the Saggy mind.
🙂



Sure, we don't mind your balance...but it just doesn't work for Sags (i.e. you are not able to balance Sags as your will)😉

Don't want to make you upset by losing your balance here 😢

I have to run... Happy Easter 🙂
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DMV
@DMV
15 Years25,000+ PostsSagittarius

Comments: 295 · Posts: 28989 · Topics: 654
Posted by everevolvingepithet
Posted by luckystar007
Posted by clunkclickeverytrip

But you, little cat lady are right, both these signs are so so sensitive !! They need nurture, watering daily and preening...the occasional pruning and lots ove love and light ! Maybe even a cool and breezy air to blow away those cobbywebs !




You are such a sweet-talker 😉

But not BOTH signs.......just Scorps are super sensitive & controlling!!! Sags don't need that kind of "nurture" as you said... we just need space & freedom above all!!! And Sags are happiest people in this world because we are the most "optimistic" out of 12 signs 🙂


I think Mr.Clunk Click was right and you saggy's can be quite sensitive...I'm just adding my diplomatic non-judgement Libran opinion to the proceedings here. 🙂
click to expand




i also agree
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brianafay
@brianafay
19 Years25,000+ PostsSagittarius

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Posted by everevolvingepithet
Posted by luckystar007
Posted by clunkclickeverytrip

But you, little cat lady are right, both these signs are so so sensitive !! They need nurture, watering daily and preening...the occasional pruning and lots ove love and light ! Maybe even a cool and breezy air to blow away those cobbywebs !




You are such a sweet-talker 😉

But not BOTH signs.......just Scorps are super sensitive & controlling!!! Sags don't need that kind of "nurture" as you said... we just need space & freedom above all!!! And Sags are happiest people in this world because we are the most "optimistic" out of 12 signs 🙂


I think Mr.Clunk Click was right and you saggy's can be quite sensitive...I'm just adding my diplomatic non-judgement Libran opinion to the proceedings here. 🙂
click to expand




Lol stop it
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luckystar007
@luckystar007
13 Years500+ Posts

Comments: 2 · Posts: 690 · Topics: 31
Posted by everevolvingepithet
Stop what ?
That guy was being insightful, even in the midst of his plight (see the Leo board).




Just came back...look like you want to continue...—

I don't know who is "that guy"...because I don't care who he is......at all!!!!!!!!!!!!

I just say what I think......one of Sag's nature... Plus, I talk to people "equally"...no matter who they are.......just another nature of Sags... 🙂

You are lucky to learn all such "great natures" of Sags from Sag board... welcome here 😉
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FUM
@FUM
15 Years1,000+ Posts

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Thank you so much for your input, everyone! 😄

I see most of you agreed on Sag & Scorpio having a different perspective to commitment. Where are the differences?

To me 'commitment' is just being interested in one person. I wouldn't want anyone else to come closer to me (physically). That would include a 'casual' relation to which I can feel committed to. Which happened with this SAG and me. Also some other Sag man in the past. And I would make sure NOT to give out any 'false' body language to anyone who would show interest in me. Let's say, if the guy would openly, that is 'verbally' show interest in me, then I would tell him I am seeing someone else or I'm with someone.

Although, I must say... eventhough I wouldn't flirt with someone else either, I have been mistaken for flirting in the past. Which I didn't... it was more like a battle of the wits, but the Virgo guy thought I was interested in him.

So anyway. What's the difference when you say Sagittarius type of 'commitment'?
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FUM
@FUM
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Posted by Ligeia
Posted by SagChick411
Posted by FUM
SagChick -- to me, yes there is. To him .. all I know is he kept bouncing back. Eventhough I refused to meet him for 2 years... his insisting emails didn't stop. He used to email me few times a week. This can't be only about the chase, i think, could it?




I don't think it's just about the 'chase' atal. He clearly likes you but maybe isn't taking how you feel about him seriously? Sags love to joke around and stuff so if you two have got great banter anyway and then you tell him how you feel he may think you're just saying it.

Sagis generally (from what I know) don't really talk of 'real' feelings. I guess the men are worse in that way as they try and protect themselves by making everything lighthearted. It can come across as not being serious (ESPECIALLY to a Scorp who takes everything seriously more or less)

From my experience there is NO way a Sag man will chase for that long if he genuinely didn't have deeper feelings for you.



Let's be real here, 5 years is nothing but

TIME! Doesn't give any weight to their

"relationship" clearly, because they haven't

progressed at all to anything "substantial".

And Fum is unhappy and in the dark. It seems

like he deals with her when he's having a lull

period in his life. And she's been more than

willing to comply.



@ Fum

You're story with this Sag has some holes and

I'm just not getting what the hell is going

on with you two smh,lol.
click to expand




LOL I very much agree with you, when you say it is not a substantial relationship. It's been always a casual one. However, he always shows interest in finding out if I'm with someone or not. Every time he came around, I was telling him that I was seeing someone else. But I also used to think... "Leave me Alone and move on!". He doesn't give me what I want, so why bother anyway? Then when he found out that I wasn't seeing anybody, he started this few-times-a-week thing. He was part of my Facebook. When I used to see him online there, I used to get out of FB as fast as possible, because I didn't want to be asked every time.

Then one day he said, "You 'rejected' me too many times!" He deleted and blocked me. T
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FUM
@FUM
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Posted by DMV
DAMMIT FUM!

are we living identical lives—? i relate to alot of what you said. one word. MISUNDERSTANDINGS!

just when you think youve figured each other out BAM ZOOM POW right in the kisser. square one? naw, never that. your progressing, just at a slow pace. ive mentioned to a few other people, you must be willing to take the road less traveled and try a new approach... eh?

as a frightful scorpio moon dealing with an unstable and intimidating scorpio man, he is undoubtedly my equal. but that doesnt mean i like his stankin ass all the time. ive considered bodily harm many times, but they would make me take my weave out in jail. NO DEAL!

anyways. i find him to be intimidating at times. such a 8 ball. do i talk to him? do i not? what do i talk to him about? am i just another girl whose completely wrapped up in him. im probably not the only one trying to be the only one (thanks Drake). but i promised myself, that i would be the one to give him the best ride of his life, for worse or better. lets see how crazy this mofo can really get. i want tears dammit! plus maybe something else...

you stated yourself, you cant turn away. so why should you? damn you Drake and your catchy ass verses...YOLO..you only live once.



HAH! 😄

this is painful and funny at the same time.

The last time he blocked me off FB, I think he was jealous thinking I went with someone to a trip. He always asks questions in a nonchalant way, but suddenly he turned quiet. Blocked me. Then wrote me some business-like email of why he removed me from FB... some lame excuse like 'I'm outsourcing my FB', kinda lame one.

Then 2 weeks later he came around, I told him that I resent being deleted and blocked like that. He said, 'who cares.. it's just a social media and not to be trusted anyway'.

then I bombarded him with long and emotional emails. If he wants to deal with me, then deal in a realistic way. LOL

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FUM
@FUM
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Posted by brianafay
Scorps are just so serious and sensitive sometimes....oy veyyyy

I feel like there's just a disconnect...we're not in sync.

We think you're funny when you're not trying to be...you don't know how to take us half the time...think we "play too much."

*shrugs*



we are not trying to be serious, we just are... especially when it concerns matters of the heart and THAT sucks!!!
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FUM
@FUM
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Posted by luckystar007
Posted by everevolvingepithet
Stop what ?
That guy was being insightful, even in the midst of his plight (see the Leo board).



Just came back...look like you want to continue...—

I don't know who is "that guy"...because I don't care who he is......at all!!!!!!!!!!!!

I just say what I think......one of Sag's nature... Plus, I talk to people "equally"...no matter who they are.......just another nature of Sags... 🙂

You are lucky to learn all such "great natures" of Sags from Sag board... welcome here 😉
click to expand




Well... I'm so happy this board is moving, compared to 3+ years ago. There used to be a post once a week at times and rarely a sag posted, other than the mind-juggle fun posts. The serious posts were by those who were Sag struck.

Now it should read, 'How to deal with us serious earthlings?' 😉

I'm appreciating equally finding out 'minds of great natures' 😉
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DMV
@DMV
15 Years25,000+ PostsSagittarius

Comments: 295 · Posts: 28989 · Topics: 654
Posted by FUM
Thank you so much for your input, everyone! 😄

I see most of you agreed on Sag & Scorpio having a different perspective to commitment. Where are the differences?

To me 'commitment' is just being interested in one person. I wouldn't want anyone else to come closer to me (physically). That would include a 'casual' relation to which I can feel committed to. Which happened with this SAG and me. Also some other Sag man in the past. And I would make sure NOT to give out any 'false' body language to anyone who would show interest in me. Let's say, if the guy would openly, that is 'verbally' show interest in me, then I would tell him I am seeing someone else or I'm with someone.

Although, I must say... eventhough I wouldn't flirt with someone else either, I have been mistaken for flirting in the past. Which I didn't... it was more like a battle of the wits, but the Virgo guy thought I was interested in him.

So anyway. What's the difference when you say Sagittarius type of 'commitment'?



i am actually very serious about commitment once i find someone worthy to commit to. as a venus in cap, I choose my partner..my partner doesnt choose me. When i find someone worth my time and money, Im all IN! if I dont, I'm all out. I dont half step. either i fucks with you or i dont. ambivalence isnt good for me. venus in cap usually makes a decision about someone in 2 minutes of meeting them. a few choice questions and the interview is over.
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DMV
@DMV
15 Years25,000+ PostsSagittarius

Comments: 295 · Posts: 28989 · Topics: 654
Posted by FUM
Posted by DMV
DAMMIT FUM!

are we living identical lives—? i relate to alot of what you said. one word. MISUNDERSTANDINGS!

just when you think youve figured each other out BAM ZOOM POW right in the kisser. square one? naw, never that. your progressing, just at a slow pace. ive mentioned to a few other people, you must be willing to take the road less traveled and try a new approach... eh?

as a frightful scorpio moon dealing with an unstable and intimidating scorpio man, he is undoubtedly my equal. but that doesnt mean i like his stankin ass all the time. ive considered bodily harm many times, but they would make me take my weave out in jail. NO DEAL!

anyways. i find him to be intimidating at times. such a 8 ball. do i talk to him? do i not? what do i talk to him about? am i just another girl whose completely wrapped up in him. im probably not the only one trying to be the only one (thanks Drake). but i promised myself, that i would be the one to give him the best ride of his life, for worse or better. lets see how crazy this mofo can really get. i want tears dammit! plus maybe something else...

you stated yourself, you cant turn away. so why should you? damn you Drake and your catchy ass verses...YOLO..you only live once.



HAH! 😄

this is painful and funny at the same time.

The last time he blocked me off FB, I think he was jealous thinking I went with someone to a trip. He always asks questions in a nonchalant way, but suddenly he turned quiet. Blocked me. Then wrote me some business-like email of why he removed me from FB... some lame excuse like 'I'm outsourcing my FB', kinda lame one.

Then 2 weeks later he came around, I told him that I resent being deleted and blocked like that. He said, 'who cares.. it's just a social media and not to be trusted anyway'.

then I bombarded him with long and emotional emails. If he wants to deal with me, then deal in a realistic way. LOL

click to expand




sounds like you guys are still trying to establish who wears the pants.
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DMV
@DMV
15 Years25,000+ PostsSagittarius

Comments: 295 · Posts: 28989 · Topics: 654
Posted by FUM
Perhaps ...

i'm just adventure to him.

I'm a forbidden fruit. I don't fit the norm, so it must be exciting.




you very well could be an adventure to him. sag men are easy, imo. you have to give them rules EARLY on. if you dont, they will treat you anyway they feel and youll be stuck waiting for the phone to ring. tell him straight up what you want and it he wants differently. there ya go. but you have to mean it and follow thru!

i need this kind of tough love all the time to keep me from messing around with dudes and continually taking them for granted. i havent found one guy, even the scorp, who will put the brakes on me and mean it. many of tried, none have been sucessful. i always resort back unless there are severe consequences, then i laugh in there face and ask them "who run this?"
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FUM
@FUM
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Posted by DMV
Posted by FUM
Perhaps ...

i'm just adventure to him.

I'm a forbidden fruit. I don't fit the norm, so it must be exciting.




you very well could be an adventure to him. sag men are easy, imo. you have to give them rules EARLY on. if you dont, they will treat you anyway they feel and youll be stuck waiting for the phone to ring. tell him straight up what you want and it he wants differently. there ya go. but you have to mean it and follow thru!

i need this kind of tough love all the time to keep me from messing around with dudes and continually taking them for granted. i havent found one guy, even the scorp, who will put the brakes on me and mean it. many of tried, none have been sucessful. i always resort back unless there are severe consequences, then i laugh in there face and ask them "who run this?"
click to expand




Initially there were no rules. All I wanted was affection. He claimed, the wanted same... great match! He was best in even 'after-cuddle'. Very sensual and attentive.

DMV, later I put my foot down because I didn't want the casual meetings anymore. I was looking for someone around my age, who can give me an all-around relationship. I explained this to Sag man.

All he says is "let me know if you change your mind". NO, I'm not changing my mind! I want a relationship with someone who I can also be friends with. This is a repeated conversation in between us. If he is not going to value me even as a gf, I'm not in for it. I keep my distance. I was very open with my intentions. Otherwise, it will be always a NO!

Perhaps it is the 'who will last longer in being stubborn?' but no.. .it is not working out for me.

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DMV
@DMV
15 Years25,000+ PostsSagittarius

Comments: 295 · Posts: 28989 · Topics: 654
well than FUM, this is your problem. not his. you said it yourself, you and him orignally got to gether for a "good time." but now, you want more. you cant expect him to want the same. i think you played a little scorpio female game and your trying to flip the script on him and (forgive me for being blunt) the shit aint working, now your mad and frustrated. again, this is 100% your problem.

he said what any dude would say who isnt down for a relationship let me know if you change your mind

its happened to the best of us. COOL, you want a more serious relationship, but your barking up the wrong tree sista girl. who starts this "continued conversation?"

this is not him being stubborn, he's waiting for you to give up on the idea of wanting a relationship from him and back to having a "good time." like any man, he will wait for ever 4 dem cookies.

your not following thru. no more communicaton. he's done. its a wrap. erase him. if he comes back ready to give you what you want, test the shit out of him.
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SagChick411
@SagChick411
13 Years1,000+ Posts

Comments: 46 · Posts: 1157 · Topics: 46
Posted by everevolvingepithet
Posted by luckystar007
Posted by clunkclickeverytrip

But you, little cat lady are right, both these signs are so so sensitive !! They need nurture, watering daily and preening...the occasional pruning and lots ove love and light ! Maybe even a cool and breezy air to blow away those cobbywebs !




You are such a sweet-talker 😉

But not BOTH signs.......just Scorps are super sensitive & controlling!!! Sags don't need that kind of "nurture" as you said... we just need space & freedom above all!!! And Sags are happiest people in this world because we are the most "optimistic" out of 12 signs 🙂


I think Mr.Clunk Click was right and you saggy's can be quite sensitive
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YES it's true unfortunately. Wehhhhhhhhhhhhhhh !!!! lol
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