Affection

This topic was created in the Scorpio forum by missmorals on Saturday, August 26, 2006 and has 47 replies.
Ok, I am not the most affectionate person in the world when it comes to a love interest.
I am just your ultimate no nonsense, down to earth, blunt kind of person. I don't actually know how to respond when someone expresses an interest which leaves the other party completely baffled as to whether I like them or not. With friends I am fine to an extent. Even they moan about the quality of my hugs (I don't do hugs)
I have been told I am a tad boisterous and should show more of a gentle/girly side and be a bit more affectionate to show interest.
Is this a Scorpio trait? I thought I was doing an ok job at displaying my feelings. Obviously not!..Yes I am proud but I am not sensitive. I also don't go harping on about the fact that I am stubborn, need to control and kick the guy to the kerb if he so much as breathes incorrectly (although these qualities do exist) I find that all rather irritating and immature.
So what do you all think? Should I be a bit more affectionate towards the object of my desire? Guys opinions welcome.
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Same here. I also think I did ok with showing such gestures, but the truth is, I greatly suck at it. If you ask why? I think I don't have this in my nature. Sometimes I think I have inadequate expression, yet, nothing better comes to my mind.
I also see people show alot of affection...as....childish. Perhaps the biggest reason is this. Who knows, maybe I loose alot of opportunities by doing this, yet, I can see alot of people who get f-ked by this up, therefore I speak only with poeple I trust. What makes a person trustworthy, I can't tell exactly. Yet, it does exist.
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I see it as a weakness....and weakness in my vocabulary = Big Fat No
But I want to know how guys see this..So say Haffo your object of desire is complaining that your not affectionate enough..would you change your ways if you wanted her enough?
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Lol..Ok..thats good to know. Wonder why I am not that affectionate Sad guess I test a little too much. I need to chill the hell out..
No, I can safely say I don't cross dress..very much a lady..
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Missmorals
Read my post again. I am affectionate towards people I trust. That includes people who are object of my affection. What I was trying to say, is that being more affectionate toward people I don't know well, might make me lose some advantages.
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If my object of affection wants more affection than I give to her, I would first look at her rather than to myself. Almost 90% of situations I find the other party having problems , not me.
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No MM, it is definitely NOT a scorpio thing. I fully agree with qttommy there. I shower my object of affection with love and what not and he just enjoys it smile
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Hmmm..now I am worried..lol..I am playful, funny etc..but when it comes to displaying emotions, I freeze..
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MM, is it the influence of your Virgo rising ??? Masking what you feel/are inside ???
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I really think it could be Topazwoman. I've always been like this. Nothing fazes me. I am completely unshockable. I was an extremely moody and quiet child. Hmm..ok..don't mean to turn this into a counselling session!..lol
I can be affectionate. I know its bursting to get out of me..Maybe I can just release it a tad.
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That Virgo rising must play a big part. I am also critical of anything that isn't perfect..Hmmm..
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Lol @ Pluto. I think we were seperated at birth!
So do virgos want to see affection? Cos my poor guy really isn't seeing much at the moment.
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You asked whether he had any leo in his chart. I think his moon sign is either Leo or Sagitarius and venus in Cancer. Venus is the sign of love/relationship so I guess he needs it. Lol..
I like anyone I can be a psychologist to. Somebody I can bring out of themselves to make them a better person. That makes me love them dearly..
My friend works with a virgo guy. He's so intelligent yet he chooses to waste his life doing a menial job. I am working my magic on him at the moment. Lecture after lecture for him to start thinking of his self-worth.
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I have the same problem. My crab pointed it out to me and I've been called 'cold' whaaaaaa? moi?... people take notice. Somehow I feel like by me being playful and funny I'm showing interest orrr even being possessive is a way of showing I care. Most of the time I joke back when I'm shown too much affection! Aaaarrrrgh I can LOVEEEEEE you and my chest is exploding with affection but I'm just NOT expressive! How do you do it?
I don't know what to blame it on, my mother was very affectionate when I was a teeny bopper, even my little brother is very affectionate, they're so quick to hug *shivers* I always have to fight him off. I remember I used to sleep in on my b-day because I knew what awaited me... mushiness and hugs! I REALLY REALLY REALLY DO NOT LIKE IT, AT ALL. I show my affection in other ways.
Well that's a good question to ask Virgos... do they want plenty of attention? They can be so sweet and thoughtful themselves *thump*thump* LOL Good thing is, I sense they aren't needy. As long as you show them interest they stick around smile Yessssssssssssssssssssss Big Grin Big Grin Big Grin
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I guess I'm confused. By reading this, Scorp's aren't into affection? The Scorp I've been seeing is....well for now he is. Will it likely change once he feels he's trapped me? lol
Raising Peanuts, why did you do away with the TaurusChic name?
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woohoo...
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"Somehow I feel like by me being playful and funny I'm showing interest orrr even being possessive is a way of showing I care. Most of the time I joke back when I'm shown too much affection! Aaaarrrrgh I can LOVEEEEEE you and my chest is exploding with affection but I'm just NOT expressive! How do you do it? "
YOU GET ME..I mean I am being playful for crying out loud..That means I like you..what more do you want..blood!!
HP - Don't worry. I think Scorpio men are more affectionate then the women..you have nothing to worry about
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PL- Leo moon and Cancer venus..I guess I get the double whammy too...
Lol..Well its nice..and I will reciprocate..If I can..lol
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LOL @ Gulp...yes Scorpio men have that power. Even us scorpio women can go gulp...The guy I talk to in USA..he's a friend, known him for a year..He's so hot and godamn sexy..and he can melt me with one stare over webcam and I am like completely gargar....He's scorpio..
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"YOU GET ME..I mean I am being playful for crying out loud..That means I like you..what more do you want..blood!!"
- Yesssssssssssssss smile *sigh* I think I'm just as in lurrrrrrrrve with this Virgo... no wonder I can't stop giggling ha hahaha he keeps saying I'm adorabe Big Grin
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They are affectionate towards me, I am just not affectionate towards them although I love them dearly and would seriously do harm to anybody who so much as crosses them. I seriously do freeze when someone approaches me for a hug. Apart from my Sagitarius best friend. She just gives awesome hugs whether I like it or not..she just squeezes me to death.
I guess I can be once the trust is built but not naturally an affectionate person.
Rainingpeanuts - love the name..lol..
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missmorals,
Practice makes perfect.
Hope this helps
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Being a scorpio .. i love recieving hugs from people but i am really bad at showing any affection towards the people i love (in a physical way) on the other hand i do show how much they mean to me in the things i do for them. I am not an affectionate person either i keep a barrier unless i fully trust that person.
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I think trust is a big factor in showing affection. It doesn't come naturally for some. MM, maybe you just need to build that trust before you can show any form of affection. Your Virgo should be able to understand that. Good luck! smile
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OOOO a thread about *affection*
I like affection ... giving it and receiving it Winking
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You know what...I'm not overly affectionate either. My friends HATE when they try to hug me and I dodge them smile even my mother who is an Aquarius said "Girl, what is wrong with you. You hate to be touched" Not all together true. I can do the hand holding, hugging, kissing thing sometime but if you start doing it too much. You may get a bad reaction from me something along the lines of "Get the hell off me, or leave me alone"! I think it depends on your upbringing though. If your family is affectionate it may rub off more on you.
My girlfriend is a Scorpio and she is REAL affectionate. I stayed over her house and she hugged me goodnight before I went to bed. She always kisses her mom goodbye and says "i love you" before she leaves. She misses her husband when he is gone for-two days-please...maybe after a week smile
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Oh gosh Karima..that would make me feel sick..just reading about it, I want to grab the bucket and puke..I can't bear the grand affectionate gestures..
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My scorp has his moments. There are times when he makes me feel like I'm the only thing in the world that matter, then moments later he could make me feel like I'm being completely taken for granted.
And on another note, I love -no, need- affection. I may be much needier than the average virgirl, but I crave feeling loved.
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"makes me feel like I'm the only thing in the world that matter, then moments
later he could make me feel like I'm being completely taken for granted"
Yeah thats normal with us. I have done it so many times. Can turn into ice within seconds, leaving the other person wondering whether I actually ever had any feelings for them!
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QUOTE "Hmmm..now I am worried..lol..I am playful, funny etc..but when it comes to displaying emotions, I freeze.."
It must be your virgo rising.
QUOTE "Oh gosh Karima..that would make me feel sick..just reading about it, I want to grab the bucket and puke..I can't bear the grand affectionate gestures.."
Hahahahahahaha That's f'n funny!!!
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Welcome to the board LV - Are u a newbie?
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Been here for a couple of months now. Thanks MM. Love your postings!
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smile
I try...
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You sould much more like a virgo than a scorpio......Scorpios are one of the most affectionate signs...virgos are the cold fish type for whom a simply warm gesture becomes rocket science.
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Curious question: You made a comment where you admitting to not giving your guy much affection and then wondering what to do about it? That reminds me of a virgo that I was in a very unfulfilling 1 1/2 yr relationship with. They would know they were being neglectful, and then "wonder what to do about it". What's to wonder? Pay the man some attention lol....virgo-natured people are funny and cute to me the way they grasp the most complex things, but often completely miss something as simple as "the way to fix neglect is to not dish it out". Can it get any simpler? They'll watch you be frustrated from across the room, truly feel bad about, and do absoutley nothing...that would drive me crazy.....especially as a cardinal sign.
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LOL @ CancerLA...
He knows I give it in small doses..I've explained my kind of affection..He said "right, so when your abusing me verbally, I should take that as affection cos you care?"..LMAO!...yes darling..thats the one..pat on the back..well done you!
He'll get affection and then some once I have him in a firm grasp Winking
Until then....muahahhahahahaha
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Scorp_in_law - "This time around however, I'm highly motivated to play the touchy-feely game. Both as the giver and receiver...it's just seems to come naturally"
Yeah maybe it will come naturally. I guess its down to the individual as well...
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Lol..Don't worry Dy, I will be like that with him once we are exclusive. I couldn't fake affection if I tried..I can't stand the word fake..
What you just described there (Deb) is the perfect description of me in my whacky moods..Virguy knows it too..he even said, I love your crazy moods, your bouncing off walls..keep it up!..lol..Well I guess somebody needs to..Cos lets face it, he's far too serious to do that..Lol...but its just the cutest thing ever..Last night he puts his holiday pictures on msn and I was like "don't put pictures like that up at this hour" and he's come back with "hahaha, why not, tell me babe, why not"..Hmmmm..I could've wrestled him there and then..Love it when he goes all shy when I keep pressing for him to tell me what he's thinking..he goes "forget it"...or "whatever"..I just laugh..
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I hope the word your referring to is "love"? or passion?
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Thought so..
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Lets not count the chickens before they're hatched eh...have yet to meet the dude..could go either way..
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So true....I also have trouble dishing out touchy-feely time gestures to even friends, but to a S.O it's almost effortless unless it's done every two seconds, which at that point it becomes meaningless and annoying. But yeah, my sister and mom are virgos and all the time...hugs, linking of arms and I always get this gagging feeling cause it looks so overt and attention seeky...lol...maybe it's just inborn and one can teach themselves to change.....I"ve always admired though subtle gestures of affection....like finger linking, holding hands...etc...but huge gestures.....they kind of seem ofputting.....it's weird....and whoever said scorps freeze when receinveing hugs or huge gestures of emotions.....right on......it's like "what should I do now?"...or fish pat on the back...to make them feel like you're into it...lol
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Lol!..Yes I remember my pisces friend, before she went on holiday hugged me at the train station..she said when I come back I am going to teach you how to hug..so it doesn't feel as though I am hugging a stone statue..LOL
I do freeze..but yes to a loved one..object of affection it comes naturally but only if its returned..if it isn't then freeze mode..turn into a flippin ice block
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EG: "If I'm sitting on the sofa with him and I'm on the far side - he'll say "what are you doing way over there?" and then I am REQUIRED to move in closer or else he'll PULL me over!"
LOL..This is also the case with my one..the randy bugger!
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Nope...sometimes we geniunly want to sit over there...
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That is a major cause of breakups in the UK..bloody xbox or ps2!...god I can't stand them..however sometimes..ONLY sometimes I want to join in with the fighting and racing games..
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"I will touch ..."
HAHAHAH..
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LOL @ PM...get laid woman!!!
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