Hi everyone, I'm newish here and thought I'd ask for some advice. My Scorpio ex recently sent me packing due to life stress, hating his job and over all not being a happy dude. I respect him and his decision to get his life sorted out. We we're best friends before we began dating. When I reached out to him to see how he was,he asked for a bit of a break but please keep him updated on my job searches etc. My question: is it normal to push ppl away when feeling like you have failed? I am a Cap sun, Virgo moon and he is Scorpio sun Taurus moon. At this point, I am not looking to rekindle but want to give him what he needs in the way of support. I know if I was feeling like this,I'd like support and love. He seems to be angry that I offered and just different. Help please!
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Apr 01, 2016Comments: 2 · Posts: 3802 · Topics: 14
No. It's not normal for me.
I'd rather have someone to lean on and help me through.
To be honest, that would insult me...I'm good enough to date/sleep with but not good enough to help you through your rough patches?
Bye.
Thank you Arielle. Quantum, he used to lean on me but something happened and he is full of rage these days. I have been good to him and he decided to ice me out for no reason.
I think he is fed up with life. He isn't talking to me these days but he was raging about not feeling himself.
No reincarnation, lol. It's more of he isn't where he wants to be in his career and career is happiness to him.
Infinite8, thank you! Never saw that side of it. Honestly, I have never broken up with some one I love thus much and with someone I had an excellent relationship with. From what I m reading, it's best to let him fix himself and feel more like himself. In other words, stand by but don't pry.
Some scorpios can be extremely deep and from my experience very spiritual. If he is not himself then he is being honest with you. It seems to me he may be doing some deep inner soul searching .... and for a scorpio..... dealing personal inner angst ... sorry but they will close up. Almost like a deep inner transformation. Scorpios are complicated yes ... but if this guy cared anything for you which it seems like he may have .... he is just being honest. Scorpios hold in a lot. Extremely deep people. He will ask you for support if he needs it imo .......
Thanks Bottabing. He legit flipped out last month when he broke it off. Stating that he loves me and I'm awesome but he literally hates himself. Then he asked for space and disappeared. We have had a few of these issues but I have always been able to reason with him. He said it best can't love you if I don't love me. I sent him email reassuring that I'm here if he needs me and so on.
If he loves you he has love for you, but honestly if he said that he hated himself .... yeah it may hard for him to love you the way you need to be loved. In order to love someone else intimately ya can't hate yourself at all, but he did love enough to let you go... I know it may seem like sudden etc ..... but scorpio are good their true emotions though ......
I have been in a similar situation.. Last night after being on a break with my Scorp for a month, we broke it off. The initial meaning of the break was to give him space and time apart so he could work on himself with the intent to see each other again, but he is saying he has no idea how long it will take and it's not fair for me to wait. He struggles with depression and can't open up, says he is miserable and that the break up has nothing to do with me. But he just wants to be alone and wants to fix himself. This has happened before and we got back together but I hate the cycle, He told me I'm wonderful and wants to keep in touch. Which means he thinks he can come back on his terms.The only advice I can give is to give him the space he wants and do you, if he really cares he will be back but don't think about that. The more you push the more he will pull away. But like I said it's a vicious cycle and so tiring, they will keep doing it.
Medusa, did your guy have issues from his past that reappear too? I have no problem giving him space but he has a lot of childhood stuff that rears its ugly head too. We haven't had a full cycle but a few mini episodes in the past. Thank you for sharing insight.
Infinite and bott, you guys have really given me ALOT to think about. I know this is a rough patch for him and I will leave him be as I have been. It just hurts to watch such an an amazing man spin out like that. He has confided in me deeply. I know this mans history of jobs, family etc. he has a lot going on internally.
Hey,
I feel for you. Hang in there -- your Scorp will appreciate it. I'm a Scorp myself, so will try to help you out.....
From reading what you said, I think you should trust what your man told you. Scorps are usually honest. And it's very difficult to explain the tumult of emotions that happen within us.
I think your man is being wise to keep you away. We can get really angry and afraid when going through our death/rebirth cycle, because we don't know how we're going to come out of it. Scorps face these darknesses often, and we need to get quiet so we can hear what our intuition is saying amidst the drama.
Yes, I know it might SEEM like you'd want a friend at these times -- but our darkness can seem very dark, and we want to protect our loved ones from it.
He may even have a weather eye out for how you're handling this. A Scorp, if he loves you, wants you to see all sides of him.
If he IS in fact lying, and wants to blow you off in some way, I think the truth will come out pretty quickly, Scorps detest dishonesty.
But I feel there's cause for a lot of hope. Hang in there.
Scorp Girl
P.S. To my (few) detractors on the Cap board, who treated my boyfriend problems with such animosity a year ago, I wanted to show you how it's done: here is a Scorp treating a hurting Cap with love and compassion and the best advice she can muster. It's called class. You can be realistic without being cruel. Now go find some more twigs to thread into your broomsticks.
That's interesting taniwha. I think he needs to take care of the core issues, they have plagued him through out life.
Scorpgirl. You rock! This is what I needed and I would have given you advice too. 😊
I showed your thread to my scorpio bew.
My taurus broke off an engagement recently to an ex. He was going through so much internally. Me and my scorpio have had our ups and downs as well. We have also separated moved on from each other for a very long time. Long story short he found her. Grew with her and I grew with other partners as well. I saw that you said he is a taurus moon ....... (very honest people and good hearted) so keep that in mind. My scorpio is also a taurus moon..... he offered to explain from a scorpio perspective........... so I will type his response for him..... " I am sorry about the pain you may be feeling from this guy.... but understand that he could be feeling like he is dying spiritually for living a lie......... I know for myself..... I loved my ex, but I was missing something and that was true passion within the relationship..... I felt lost in a sense ..... because I myself went through so much in my childhood and other relationships. Even though these things happened in the past...... I buried them deep within and carried it with me all my life. I always felt like no one would understand. This caused me to search deeper over the years...... finally I realized that through it all there was one person who got it completely ..... and that was (he said me).... through all the pain and hurt and good relationship (Bottabing) never judged me for any of it. I watched her go through so much as well all of her life so much pain ..... and I never judged her....... while we both did our own thing ..... she (Bottabing) was always there with me on an intimate level and spritual level..... it was the only thing that kept me from falling completely apart....... even when I had my ex there ...... and no I never cheated on my ex with (Bottabing) she Bottabing understood fully the situation and much respect for our relationship.... through it all she offered was true unconditional love ..... with no strings attached .... on top of all of that ....... my job I felt like was sucking every bit out of me because I felt that ...... it had to be more to this ...... and if I am not truly happy with my carreer ......and not able to provide and pursue what is truly passionate to me ..... I became depressed. Now this is how I feel about it ...... I could no longer live a lie I had to live my truth. I broke the engagement off and closed myself off to the world .... I had to spiritually go in deeper within myself.... I found that I was truly in love with someone else. And that was bottabing. I could no longer put my ex through the pain of not being honest in that relationship. I quit my job and have moved on to love of my life (Bottabing)
Scorpioluver ..... Bottabing here ...... me and my scorpio went through so much .... I went through a huge depression not happy with life and my job and even abuse in the past ...... and in all of that my scorpio was there ....... in some form and majority of the time it was not even in the physical sense.... I have a mars in scorpio so I understand my scorpios reasons ...... I wanted something passionate as well.... long story short I completely gave it all up ..... my job .... my depression ...... and I dropped fighting the feelings I had for him. We are now finally together thank God ...... one thing ....... we both were willing to let it all go to be together.... no matter what anyone thought ...... through all of the pain through life .... we finally accepted that we love each other ..... things are looking up for the both of us. This month .... there are some major shifts in energy ..... scorpios in particular from what I noticed ....... a lot of scorpios have been dealing with extreme pain ...... if you are willing to stick it out with this guy is up to you ...... with his taurus moon and him breaking it off ...... like that .... it may be the end...... taurus moons are fixed signs ......... they will hang on to relationships for years and years years .... even when truly deep down they are not happy. But he is still a scorpio too ...... that combination and break like that ..... truly seems he wants a change all together. Pray for him.... and give him his space..... when you push he want budge ..... trust me I know .... they are extremely stubborn .......
Botta, thank you for sharing your story! I actually understand being that extra special person in my ex's life. He had no issue after our first year together( letting me in that inner sanctum) being completely honest with me about his life, goals etc. we just separated a few weeks ago and I feel a huge void where he used to be. We haven't had much contact as he asked for a break. He is deep with in himself these days and as hard as it is not to save him, I have to let him face this alone. It's killing me but I get it. I haven't had the best of luck with my own mental state and have been working on me too. Please tell your mate, thank you as well
13th, yes his career is everything to him. Thank you
Best wishes to you .... I think all signs are dealing with some inner healing and sometimes we all need to take a step back and do some inner soul searching and ask ourselves ...... what do we feel internally versus logic IMO..... I am on a spiritual journey right now ... and my God it hasn't been easy .... but what I do know your heart will tell you the truth ..... If there is something missing in your heart space being with this person then something is not right .... and that also goes both ways for him and you ...... take the time out to meditate and ask God for assistance ..... although things may not be clear right now ..... they will become clearer for you .......