Any Scorp guys dating a Virgo woman? (Virgals, jump in if you want!)

This topic was created in the Scorpio forum by justledouxit86 on Thursday, April 18, 2019 and has 49 replies.
Been seeing an amazing Virgo woman for about 3 months now. We've been friends for 5-6 years until we started dating. She is a completely different person in a relationship, but I'm enjoying every new thing I learn about her. She just confuses the hell out of me some times lol So hard to read what's going on in that pretty mind of hers. She's unlike any woman I've ever dated before, yet I feel like I understand her more and at the same time, I don't. lol We are opposites in a lot of ways, but to me, they all seem to compliment each other's weaknesses.


I'm emotional, her... Well, she hides it well, though I can sense it under the surface. I just never quite know WHAT emotions she is feeling. Unless she is anxious... I can always tell then. It's like I have to relearn everything I know about women lol


I see a lot of potential for us if we can make it to the point where she trusts me in the relationship enough to truly open up, as it seems Virgos need a longgg time to build that trust and she has been hurt so many times, I'm sure it makes it worse. I've got all the patience in the world and she is worth it to me, but could definitely use any advice from anyone who has made it work! Virgo women, feel free to chime in as well!


I have some specific questions I'll ask later... Mostly looking for general advice on the relationship and how to best make it work, how to make her happy, how to handle each other's insecurities, etc.... I've never wanted to make a woman happy so much in my life! Lol
Just met a Scorpio woman myself and it seems like amazing chemistry. I'll be curious to see how this match plays out.
Definitely some amazing Chemistry! Good luck to you both! Keep us updated Winking
Although, I haven't had a serious relationship with too many Scorpio women, so can't give much advise there, but they are fun to date lol Expect a lot of emotion and affection... And fun in bed lol
Seems like I always repeat myself; time and time again (here goes). With her insecurities inform her that you come from different parents, different morals, different values, and she should NOT compare you to her past lovers. Remind her also that you were good friends and will remain to be friends, but serious now. Might I add that you should inform her the past is the past and she should look at her present (tell her how cars have mirrors for a reason, but she should NOT have one to review the past). Good luck!


Hug cyber hugs!


Love, Eva
Thanks @EvatheDiva52, I appreciate the advice! She is barely a year out if a long term relationship, so we are taking it slow. I know trust is a huge issue for her. She doesn't say it, but I know she is still working through her emotions about that relationship. I try to give her space to do that when I suspect she is doing that, but I'm never quite sure if that is the case. She just tells me she is fine when I ask her if something is on her mind.
Posted by Ellygant

You should ask what you want to know instead of saving it till later. If you don’t learn how to be direct you’ll not get too far with a Virgo woman.


I hope you don’t tell her she’s totally unlike all other woman etc either. If she’s a secure Virgo that will likely be a turn off. It might color you as having a lack of emotional insight into your previous dating habits. If she insecure she’ll eat up the attention tho and start using you for an ego hit.
Thanks for your advice! I compliment her a lot and try to be careful about what I say as to not make it sound obsessive. I do worry about how she interprets some of it though. I'm pretty direct with her, but usually get a pretty vague answer. I think maybe it's my poor timing though lol
Posted by justledouxit86

Thanks @EvatheDiva52, I appreciate the advice! She is barely a year out if a long term relationship, so we are taking it slow. I know trust is a huge issue for her. So I like your suggestion smile

😁 YW


Hug cyber hugs! Love, Eva
What are y'alls placements? (Besides sun sign)
Being a Scorp Sun but Virgo Moon and Virgo Asc. I'll chime in.


For myself I am horrible at talking about my feelings, I tend to be better at writing. It's easier to articulate that way. Depending on her past if she's had s*itty experiences this will amplify it and she may be afraid of your reaction. Honestly just be there for her... even if it's something small as a misunderstanding let her know you are not leaving.


Anxiety is a Biatch I deal with it daily but I'm so blessed that my Scorp man just sits with me and puts me at ease until I can talk. My past isn't rainbow's and butterflies either so reassurance is everything, my Virgo side loves the calm, fair, steady, gentle nature.


Just keep doing what you're doing, ask her questions but don't push stay gentle and steadfast.


Obsession isn’t the turn off. Virgos can deal with that easy. It’s the social implications of how you reference your past/other women. Most Virgos women I know are incredibly astute, cautious, exceptionally giving and always very fair. A man who speaks about exes like they’re a bit inconsequential/throw away is high risk. He can easily get caught up in an idea of a woman/person rather than actually bond with that person. And it’s indicative of someone who attaches to others based solely on fluctuating emotions rather than substantial goals or ideals.

Totally get what you are saying. When I say she is different from any woman I've known, it's more in the way that she doesn't show huge displays of affection, but the small things are more genuine and mean so much more to me. It's like certain things with her mean something completely different from what I am familiar with. I try to acknowledge the little things she does for me.


Also, in the past, I always looked for women who were really affectionate, but the ones who were the most affectionate turned out to relationships that were built on lies and manipulation. So this is refreshing.. feels more genuine to me. If that makes any sense?


I did say something along the lines of what I said here... I think you are right. I think that may have pushed her away a little. That and me coming off a little needy at times




Believe it or not, Virgos are exceptionally tender underneath the exterior. Vagueness is a way of evaluating you and frankly, not a good sign. While Virgos are careful, their astute nature picks up quickly on people. Most will readily open up to you if you are authentic and sincere. (That’s why you see them with Aquarius, Aries and Leos a lot. Signs that are very upfront and sincere/in the moment)


Start with being open and calm and go from there.
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So, I talked to her this morning and I didn't start it the right way, but once I started to be more direct, she told me exactly how she was feeling. She did feel I was being needy and was expecting too much of her.


I realized that maybe I was moving things a little faster in my own mind than I meant to. I told her that, apologized, explained why (because I've been depressed from other things in my life, which is when my insecurities show), and that I would pull the reins back and slow myself down.


Asked her for a fresh start and she said we were all good. That she knows I'm normally more secure and that I'm going through a rough time, so she's just been ignoring it for the most part lol Which, explains her distance. But I also know she has some other unrelated stuff that she is working through as well. More on that later though...


So, I was able to find out where I need to work on myself, which is great. She was very open and honest about it. She was worried she would hurt me if she pulled away completely and doesn't do well with confrontation. She said she most likely pulled away subconsciously because she didn't think we were on the same page as far as where we were at in the relationship.


The truth is, I need this to go slow as much as she does... I just get caught up in the lusty excitement and get carried away... Which has been the downfall to several

of my relationships in the past. I'm working on that. Been years since I've dated and I have definitely matured since my last relationship, so I know I can learn to control my pace if I just keep reminding myself to keep it slow and steady.


On the plus side, we've been talking like we used to all day since our conversation, so I must have done something right lol Going to take everyone's advice and try to keep myself centered, slow down my pace, and just be there for her when she needs/wants me, but not force myself on her like I've been doing (unintentionally of course).


I appreciate you taking the time to reply in detail. Definitely helps to hear how she might be interpreting my actions and words. smile
Posted by LostinmyMind11

What are y'alls placements? (Besides sun sign)
All I know is I am a Scorpio moon, sun, and venus. But I don't know my time of birth (need to look it up some time), so I'm not 100% on any of it.


My birthdate:

11/06/1986 around 10am... ish lol


Hers:

9/10/1984 (no clue on time, I'll ask some time though)

Posted by scorpio1108

Being a Scorp Sun but Virgo Moon and Virgo Asc. I'll chime in.


For myself I am horrible at talking about my feelings, I tend to be better at writing. It's easier to articulate that way. Depending on her past if she's had s*itty experiences this will amplify it and she may be afraid of your reaction. Honestly just be there for her... even if it's something small as a misunderstanding let her know you are not leaving.

Thanks, I'll definitely try to reassure her... I usually do, but need to work on my timing lol




Anxiety is a Biatch I deal with it daily but I'm so blessed that my Scorp man just sits with me and puts me at ease until I can talk. My past isn't rainbow's and butterflies either so reassurance is everything, my Virgo side loves the calm, fair, steady, gentle nature.


Just keep doing what you're doing, ask her questions but don't push stay gentle and steadfast.
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How does your man put you at ease? Just by being there? Does he put his arm around you or anything physical or is it just his presence and calmness?


I'm really mellow and really good at being calm in stressful situations, or so I'm told lol I may need to put a little more of a conscious effort into it though when I'm going through a depression or my own anxieties. Usually I can shelve my own issues if I need to be there for someone else, but only if they don't have me so worked up that I'm not being logical. Doesn't happen much, but obviously does happen lol


Thanks for your advice btw!
So on a side note, I know in her previous relationship she was cheated on numerous times. I never have eyes for anyone but her and I do my best to make sure she knows it.


Is there anything y'all might recommend to earn her trust in that area or at least something I could say that would reassure her in the moment if she begins to feel insecure? Looking for what would make sense for a Virgo woman... I know what I would want to hear, but I know I need to be careful about how I word things to avoid giving her a reason to over analyze things.


I've never cheated and I have strong enough beliefs in that area that I just can't ever see myself cheating, though I have been cheated on. I can be flirty when I drink a lot though, but when I'm with someone, I don't even allow myself to drink that much.


I don't think I've ever given her a reason to doubt that she is the only woman I have my eyes on but we have only been dating for a short period... I know that is one area that will take a long time to build trust in.


Any thoughts?
Posted by justledouxit86

Posted by scorpio1108

Being a Scorp Sun but Virgo Moon and Virgo Asc. I'll chime in.


For myself I am horrible at talking about my feelings, I tend to be better at writing. It's easier to articulate that way. Depending on her past if she's had s*itty experiences this will amplify it and she may be afraid of your reaction. Honestly just be there for her... even if it's something small as a misunderstanding let her know you are not leaving.

Thanks, I'll definitely try to reassure her... I usually do, but need to work on my timing lol




Anxiety is a Biatch I deal with it daily but I'm so blessed that my Scorp man just sits with me and puts me at ease until I can talk. My past isn't rainbow's and butterflies either so reassurance is everything, my Virgo side loves the calm, fair, steady, gentle nature.


Just keep doing what you're doing, ask her questions but don't push stay gentle and steadfast.
How does your man put you at ease? Just by being there? Does he put his arm around you or anything physical or is it just his presence and calmness?


I'm really mellow and really good at being calm in stressful situations, or so I'm told lol I may need to put a little more of a conscious effort into it though when I'm going through a depression or my own anxieties. Usually I can shelve my own issues if I need to be there for someone else, but only if they don't have me so worked up that I'm not being logical. Doesn't happen much, but obviously does happen lol


Thanks for your advice btw!
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When I get quiet or go into my "shut down protective" mode, he'll gently ask what's on my mind or say something like "you don't have to go through this alone you can tell me". Something along that line anyway. If I don't talk right away he'll just hug me or sit/lay there with me and rub my back or play with my hair until I speak up. He doesn't get upset or push me if I don't want to talk, he's just a steady constant there with me.
That's great he does that for you! Usually that's along the lines of what I do when she is being quiet and I know something is up. Back rub and playing with her hair seems to relax her too smile
Posted by justledouxit86

That's great he does that for you! Usually that's along the lines of what I do when she is being quiet and I know something is up. Back rub and playing with her hair seems to relax her too smile
That's awesome, just keep doing what you're doing. Sounds like you're on the right track smile don't doubt yourself!
Thanks.. I must be doing something right cuz she hasn't given me the boot yet lol
This is sweet @justledouxit86... Your scorpioness makes you want to jump in head first without looking. Her virgoness is saying- wait a minute. I think I like this guy. Do I like this guy? Is he going to jerk me around like men in the past? Does he even like me? Did I finish that project at work? Did I finish my laundry? Is he talking to other women? Etc, etc. This is the virgo mind which never stops going, ever. So if you can be calm, do things to help her be calm (walks in nature are good for us virgals), not pressure her, be honest and accountable, and #1 Be Consistent, I think things will go amazingly well for you. This is my favorite match in all of the zodiac, good luck to you!
I don't know if that's right place for me to be, but I'm a virgo rising. I do share a lot with virgo dominant people, the difference I would say is I'm x100 more emotional and my emotions take on most of the time, if pushed repeatedly. Lack of boundaries irritate me, very honest and blunt. If anxious I tend to speak my mind without thinking first, might hurt others feelings. I have my view how things should be done, sense of order in communication and everyday life. Very detail oriented. I'm not sure what exactly is your question, I guess you are just sharing but I'd say enjoy the sailing wherever it takes you.


Side question, I've heard Virgo's do not like "comfortable people" , can anyone elaborate?? Thanks


Posted by Jules-ll

This is sweet @justledouxit86... Your scorpioness makes you want to jump in head first without looking. Her virgoness is saying- wait a minute. I think I like this guy. Do I like this guy? Is he going to jerk me around like men in the past? Does he even like me? Did I finish that project at work? Did I finish my laundry? Is he talking to other women? Etc, etc. This is the virgo mind which never stops going, ever. So if you can be calm, do things to help her be calm (walks in nature are good for us virgals), not pressure her, be honest and accountable, and #1 Be Consistent, I think things will go amazingly well for you. This is my favorite match in all of the zodiac, good luck to you!
Isn't he so sweet


Not mines lol


😭😭😭😕
Oh about trust, you do not earn her trust in one go. But as you stated you guys been friends for years that would be lot easier for you. Personally I have very difficult time trusting people, to the point that I always check for details, if something doesn't add up I tend to review all the details and play it over and over in my mind, until I find the fault. Honesty is something that virgos value in general. This is something you either have it or not. Honesty and trust go hand in hand, there's no other way around
Posted by ELIGAB

Posted by Jules-ll

This is sweet @justledouxit86... Your scorpioness makes you want to jump in head first without looking. Her virgoness is saying- wait a minute. I think I like this guy. Do I like this guy? Is he going to jerk me around like men in the past? Does he even like me? Did I finish that project at work? Did I finish my laundry? Is he talking to other women? Etc, etc. This is the virgo mind which never stops going, ever. So if you can be calm, do things to help her be calm (walks in nature are good for us virgals), not pressure her, be honest and accountable, and #1 Be Consistent, I think things will go amazingly well for you. This is my favorite match in all of the zodiac, good luck to you!
Isn't he so sweet


Not mines lol


😭😭😭😕
click to expand

He does sound sweet, it's refreshing! So your man isn't sweet, or he isn't yours lol?


My scorpio is a sweetheart, I'm lucky because it took a lot of misses to find a good one. Big Grin
Posted by Jules-ll

Posted by ELIGAB

Posted by Jules-ll

This is sweet @justledouxit86... Your scorpioness makes you want to jump in head first without looking. Her virgoness is saying- wait a minute. I think I like this guy. Do I like this guy? Is he going to jerk me around like men in the past? Does he even like me? Did I finish that project at work? Did I finish my laundry? Is he talking to other women? Etc, etc. This is the virgo mind which never stops going, ever. So if you can be calm, do things to help her be calm (walks in nature are good for us virgals), not pressure her, be honest and accountable, and #1 Be Consistent, I think things will go amazingly well for you. This is my favorite match in all of the zodiac, good luck to you!
Ditto many many many hit's and misses hahaha Mine's pretty freaking amazing as well smile


Isn't he so sweet


Not mines lol


😭😭😭😕

He does sound sweet, it's refreshing! So your man isn't sweet, or he isn't yours lol?


My scorpio is a sweetheart, I'm lucky because it took a lot of misses to find a good one. Big Grin
click to expand

Posted by Jules-ll

Posted by ELIGAB

Posted by Jules-ll

This is sweet @justledouxit86... Your scorpioness makes you want to jump in head first without looking. Her virgoness is saying- wait a minute. I think I like this guy. Do I like this guy? Is he going to jerk me around like men in the past? Does he even like me? Did I finish that project at work? Did I finish my laundry? Is he talking to other women? Etc, etc. This is the virgo mind which never stops going, ever. So if you can be calm, do things to help her be calm (walks in nature are good for us virgals), not pressure her, be honest and accountable, and #1 Be Consistent, I think things will go amazingly well for you. This is my favorite match in all of the zodiac, good luck to you!
Isn't he so sweet


Not mines lol


😭😭😭😕

He does sound sweet, it's refreshing! So your man isn't sweet, or he isn't yours lol?


My scorpio is a sweetheart, I'm lucky because it took a lot of misses to find a good one. Big Grin
click to expand
Lmaoo


Nope he's not mines any longer 😂😑😞😭


Go on girl and get all that scorpio loving. I know you're happy and the love feels so good..


I could only reminisce
Posted by ELIGAB

Posted by Jules-ll

Posted by ELIGAB

Posted by Jules-ll

This is sweet @justledouxit86... Your scorpioness makes you want to jump in head first without looking. Her virgoness is saying- wait a minute. I think I like this guy. Do I like this guy? Is he going to jerk me around like men in the past? Does he even like me? Did I finish that project at work? Did I finish my laundry? Is he talking to other women? Etc, etc. This is the virgo mind which never stops going, ever. So if you can be calm, do things to help her be calm (walks in nature are good for us virgals), not pressure her, be honest and accountable, and #1 Be Consistent, I think things will go amazingly well for you. This is my favorite match in all of the zodiac, good luck to you!
Isn't he so sweet


Not mines lol


😭😭😭😕

He does sound sweet, it's refreshing! So your man isn't sweet, or he isn't yours lol?


My scorpio is a sweetheart, I'm lucky because it took a lot of misses to find a good one. Big Grin
Lmaoo


Nope he's not mines any longer 😂😑😞😭


Go on girl and get all that scorpio loving. I know you're happy and the love feels so good..


I could only reminisce
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Awww, you never fully forget them. I'm sorry...what happened?
Posted by scorpio1108

Posted by Jules-ll

Posted by ELIGAB

Posted by Jules-ll

This is sweet @justledouxit86... Your scorpioness makes you want to jump in head first without looking. Her virgoness is saying- wait a minute. I think I like this guy. Do I like this guy? Is he going to jerk me around like men in the past? Does he even like me? Did I finish that project at work? Did I finish my laundry? Is he talking to other women? Etc, etc. This is the virgo mind which never stops going, ever. So if you can be calm, do things to help her be calm (walks in nature are good for us virgals), not pressure her, be honest and accountable, and #1 Be Consistent, I think things will go amazingly well for you. This is my favorite match in all of the zodiac, good luck to you!
Ditto many many many hit's and misses hahaha Mine's pretty freaking amazing as well smile


Isn't he so sweet


Not mines lol


😭😭😭😕

He does sound sweet, it's refreshing! So your man isn't sweet, or he isn't yours lol?


My scorpio is a sweetheart, I'm lucky because it took a lot of misses to find a good one. Big Grin

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Yay, I'm happy for you!!!! They really are sweethearts, but my scorp tells me I see him differently than most people do. Guess I broke through that exterior facade...
Posted by LostinmyMind11

What are y'alls placements? (Besides sun sign)
Mine:


Scorpio - Sun, Mercury, Venus, Pluto

Capricorn - Moon, Neptune

Aquarius - Mars

Pisces - Jupiter

Sagittarius - Saturn, Uranus, Ascending


Hers (albeit, I don't know time of birth, so not sure this is accurate. She has a lot of virgo traits, but not all):

Virgo - Sun, Mercury

Scorpio - Saturn, Pluto, Ascending

Pisces - Moon

Libra - Venus

Capricorn - Jupiter

Sagittarius - Mars, Uranus, Neptune
Posted by Jules-ll

Your scorpioness makes you want to jump in head first without looking.

Yeah, unfortunately lol




Her virgoness is saying- wait a minute. I think I like this guy. Do I like this guy? Is he going to jerk me around like men in the past? Does he even like me? Did I finish that project at work? Did I finish my laundry? Is he talking to other women? Etc, etc. This is the virgo mind which never stops going, ever.



Yeah, I can always see the gears turning, but never have any clue what's going on in her head lol




So if you can be calm, do things to help her be calm (walks in nature are good for us virgals), not pressure her, be honest and accountable, and #1 Be Consistent, I think things will go amazingly well for you. This is my favorite match in all of the zodiac, good luck to you!

click to expand
Thanks! I've been trying to be as consistent as possible because this seems to be important to Virgos from what I've read. Maybe it's just reassuring. I notice the day after we talk about something serious regarding our relationship, if I start the day off like I always do, with a good morning text, she seems to be in a good mood all day. She might get distant the next day, but I sure enjoy the days when she seems happy!


I try not to pressure her... When I offer to take her and her boy to dinner occasionally, I'll actually say that there is no pressure or that she doesn't have to if she's not feeling up to it. Don't know if that comes off the wrong way, but I do mean it... Even if I get a little disappointed that I don't get to see her lol


Thankfully, honesty and accountability are my strong suit smile Since we are not "official" yet, I tell her that my only expectation from her is honesty and to tell me when I do something wrong, since I can't fix a problem I don't know about. She doesn't like confrontation though, so I'm not sure she is always up front about something I did, but if I recognize it and ask her about it, she will tell me what she was feeling or thinking.


Anyway, thanks for the response!
Posted by pisceanloves

Oh about trust, you do not earn her trust in one go. But as you stated you guys been friends for years that would be lot easier for you. Personally I have very difficult time trusting people, to the point that I always check for details, if something doesn't add up I tend to review all the details and play it over and over in my mind, until I find the fault. Honesty is something that virgos value in general. This is something you either have it or not. Honesty and trust go hand in hand, there's no other way around
Well hopefully the fact that I am honest to a fault (I try to be tactful, but it don't always work lol), will help earn her trust. I'm assuming the consistency is an an important aspect too.


Unfortunately, I have a traumatic brain injury that causes some memory loss, so when I tell stuff from my past or even my day, things sometimes end up out of order or missing or even the blanks get filled in... But she is aware of my TBI, so I'm hoping she is understanding of that and doesn't think I'm just making things up lol Even if it weren't for that, most people wouldn't believe half the stories from my life, unless they were there. Let's just say I take a lot of pictures for a reason lol Sorry, kinda rambling there, but it is something I worry about with her. Don't want her to think I am telling her made up stories or lies...
Posted by justledouxit86

Posted by LostinmyMind11

What are y'alls placements? (Besides sun sign)
Mine:


Scorpio - Sun, Mercury, Venus, Pluto

Capricorn - Moon, Neptune

Aquarius - Mars

Pisces - Jupiter

Sagittarius - Saturn, Uranus, Ascending


Hers (albeit, I don't know time of birth, so not sure this is accurate. She has a lot of virgo traits, but not all):

Virgo - Sun, Mercury

Scorpio - Saturn, Pluto, Ascending

Pisces - Moon

Libra - Venus

Capricorn - Jupiter

Sagittarius - Mars, Uranus, Neptune
click to expand
Virgo/Pisces will pretty much go hand in hand... she'll be a more emotional Virgo but we share a lot of the traits with our opposites....imo. she is going to hide it well if she is indeed a scorp riser..as you know being a scorp sun. Someone will have to chime in with the rest as I'm not familiar with the Venus/mars combo y'all have plus a lot can depend on synastry and house placements.


I love scorps but I tend to butt heads with them because I don't take their bs and their games... majority don't like that lol. Other than that, if no games and crap we are pretty similar...and with y'all being friends for so long...you know how to handle her. I think you're over thinking it. She may have had some bumps here and there...but she still the same person....maybe just a little bit more cautious.
Posted by ELIGAB


Isn't he so sweet


Not mines lol


😭😭😭😕
I take it as a compliment when someone tells me I am sweet. Was raised by a single mother to be a gentleman. Though, from outside appearances, you might not be sure. I'm a rough around the edges cowboy/rancher... I'm a big boy (husky and muscular, but not fat lol).. broken jaw from bar fights, was a bull rider and got scars to prove it, covered in tattoos, carry a gun all the time (was in law enforcement and have concealed carry permit, so not in a criminal way lol) and "fill in the blanks with a bunch of other man stuff yada yada" lol


Anyway, I try to be a good man... Doesn't always happen, but having a good woman in my life helps smile
Posted by ELIGAB

Lmaoo


Nope he's not mines any longer 😂😑😞😭


Go on girl and get all that scorpio loving. I know you're happy and the love feels so good..


I could only reminisce
Sorry to hear about your Scorp... Always nice to have something to reminisce on, even if it's bitter sweet. I only have one other relationship that I can look back fondly on. The rest were hell or just not much in the way of substance lol
Posted by LostinmyMind11

Virgo/Pisces will pretty much go hand in hand... she'll be a more emotional Virgo but we share a lot of the traits with our opposites....imo. she is going to hide it well if she is indeed a scorp riser..as you know being a scorp sun. Someone will have to chime in with the rest as I'm not familiar with the Venus/mars combo y'all have plus a lot can depend on synastry and house placements.



Yeah, she hides her emotions very well. Like I said, the only thing I can tell is WHEN something is bothering, but never what lol I'm not even sure I'm right half the time on when she is going through something... I'm afraid to push her if she doesn't want to talk about it.


Now me... I guess it depends on who I'm around. Most of my friends can't even tell when I'm depressed. Only those who spend A LOT of time with me, which is maybe my girl and 2 other people. But I never feel like I hide my emotions well... I always feel like a wreck lol Maybe it's because I don't let many people close to me?




love scorps but I tend to butt heads with them because I don't take their bs and their games... majority don't like that lol. Other than that, if no games and crap we are pretty similar...and with y'all being friends for so long...you know how to handle her. I think you're over thinking it. She may have had some bumps here and there...but she still the same person....maybe just a little bit more cautious.
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I'm sure I am over thinking it... On good days when she is really warm, I look back and it's like I have done everything right just by being me. It's only on those cold days when I doubt myself... Even if I know it has nothing to do with me...
Posted by justledouxit86

Posted by pisceanloves

Oh about trust, you do not earn her trust in one go. But as you stated you guys been friends for years that would be lot easier for you. Personally I have very difficult time trusting people, to the point that I always check for details, if something doesn't add up I tend to review all the details and play it over and over in my mind, until I find the fault. Honesty is something that virgos value in general. This is something you either have it or not. Honesty and trust go hand in hand, there's no other way around
Well hopefully the fact that I am honest to a fault (I try to be tactful, but it don't always work lol), will help earn her trust. I'm assuming the consistency is an an important aspect too.


Unfortunately, I have a traumatic brain injury that causes some memory loss, so when I tell stuff from my past or even my day, things sometimes end up out of order or missing or even the blanks get filled in... But she is aware of my TBI, so I'm hoping she is understanding of that and doesn't think I'm just making things up lol Even if it weren't for that, most people wouldn't believe half the stories from my life, unless they were there. Let's just say I take a lot of pictures for a reason lol Sorry, kinda rambling there, but it is something I worry about with her. Don't want her to think I am telling her made up stories or lies...
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Are you in the military??? My ex had a TBI and it showed. USMC veteran.
No, unfortunately my TBI is the reason I couldn't join the military... Always been a little disappointed about that.
Posted by justledouxit86

Posted by Jules-ll

Your scorpioness makes you want to jump in head first without looking.

Yeah, unfortunately lol




Her virgoness is saying- wait a minute. I think I like this guy. Do I like this guy? Is he going to jerk me around like men in the past? Does he even like me? Did I finish that project at work? Did I finish my laundry? Is he talking to other women? Etc, etc. This is the virgo mind which never stops going, ever.



Yeah, I can always see the gears turning, but never have any clue what's going on in her head lol




So if you can be calm, do things to help her be calm (walks in nature are good for us virgals), not pressure her, be honest and accountable, and #1 Be Consistent, I think things will go amazingly well for you. This is my favorite match in all of the zodiac, good luck to you!

Thanks! I've been trying to be as consistent as possible because this seems to be important to Virgos from what I've read. Maybe it's just reassuring. I notice the day after we talk about something serious regarding our relationship, if I start the day off like I always do, with a good morning text, she seems to be in a good mood all day. She might get distant the next day, but I sure enjoy the days when she seems happy!


I try not to pressure her... When I offer to take her and her boy to dinner occasionally, I'll actually say that there is no pressure or that she doesn't have to if she's not feeling up to it. Don't know if that comes off the wrong way, but I do mean it... Even if I get a little disappointed that I don't get to see her lol


Thankfully, honesty and accountability are my strong suit smile Since we are not "official" yet, I tell her that my only expectation from her is honesty and to tell me when I do something wrong, since I can't fix a problem I don't know about. She doesn't like confrontation though, so I'm not sure she is always up front about something I did, but if I recognize it and ask her about it, she will tell me what she was feeling or thinking.


Anyway, thanks for the response!
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You're welcome! When I talk about consistency it's because we are good bs detectors, so when someone doesn't do what they say they're going to do it makes us very suspicious and doubtful about a person. This is one of the reasons why I like the virgo/scorpio pairing. Both are cautious and don't need or want the limelight. We're more private, and slow to trust. Since she hasn't shut you out or gone quiet on you is a great sign. Keep working your scorpio magic while being genuine and see what happens...Once we have done all of our testing and deliberation and someone passes, we love hard and completely.


One thing I noticed is she has a pisces moon which should go well with your scorpio moon. She's probably more sensitive than a virgo that has an air or fire moon. Keep us posted!
Posted by Jules-ll

Since she hasn't shut you out or gone quiet on you is a great sign. Keep working your scorpio magic while being genuine and see what happens...Once we have done all of our testing and deliberation and someone passes, we love hard and completely.



There have been a couple times where I thought for sure she was going to disappear on my like some Virgos seem to do. Despite having had a few days where she is very short and distant, though, we talk every day, pretty much all day. And if I don't initiate, she will. So, I'm thinking that is a good thing lol


Also her body language seems to be more relaxed around me lately... You think maybe this is because we have had a few moments that could have been make or break kinda things and she is seeing that I'm not going anywhere? Is this a sign of trust or just that she is feeling more relaxed around me?


I'll tell you one thing, I'm looking forward to the big change everyone talks when a Virgo makes their decision and finally allows themselves to fall... She gets super affectionate when she drinks too much lol She's only initiated a kiss when she has been drinking. Maybe it's just her flirty side, but ifs anything like when she gets that way, I'll be in heaven! Lol



The thing I noticed is she has a pisces moon which should go well with your scorpio moon. She's probably more sensitive than a virgo that has an air or fire moon. Keep us posted!
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When you say more sensitive, do you mean to others emotions or her own emotions are stronger or both?
Today, I took her out to breakfast and after I left, maybe 20 minutes later, she asked me if I wanted to do some else today because it's nice out, which we did. I was kind of shocked! lol She's only asked me to hangout out once before, that I can think of, and it was the first week we started dating. She did ask if I could fix her mom's furnace once, which I did. Usually I'm the one who offers to take her out or asks her if she wants to hang out. So, that's gotta be a good sign right? Lol
Posted by justledouxit86

Today, I took her out to breakfast and after I left, maybe 20 minutes later, she asked me if I wanted to do some else today because it's nice out, which we did. I was kind of shocked! lol She's only asked me to hangout out once before, that I can think of, and it was the first week we started dating. She did ask if I could fix her mom's furnace once, which I did. Usually I'm the one who offers to take her out or asks her if she wants to hang out. So, that's gotta be a good sign right? Lol

I think so! When I start to trust, that's when I chase with all intentions of getting the man. That could be my scorpio mars talking though, we wrap you in a web and don't let go...


The virgo way is to observe for a long period, because we don't take relationships lightly. It sounds as if your patience is paying off. Once that door opens, are you ready to walk in and stay?
Oh yeah, I'm playing for keeps lol I haven't dated for years because I couldn't find anyone I really wanted to settle down with and wasn't going to waste their time or mine. But I can definitely see a future with this woman and Im in a place in my life where there is no reason I can't settle down.


It's still early and we both agreed to go slow, but I've got my fingers crossed this goes somewhere. She's got a good heart, is a good mother, can cut it in and enjoys my life style , she's smart, and beautiful (not to mention sexy lol) and everything I think a woman should be.


She has her flaws and some other stuff from her past, but no real red flags and nothing I can't accept as just being what makes her who she is today. I've got plenty of my own problems lol I'm hoping she will feel the same about me... Only time will tell I guess smile
Well today I was a little disappointed... She doesn't seem really interested in hanging out. I thought maybe after she asked me to hang out, we would hang out this weekend like we used to. Instead, she went with her sister to go do some stuff and is somewhat distant. Her sister and I are friends and I thought maybe she would invite me, but she's acting more like she isn't interested in hanging out. Idk... Maybe it's just because she is tired or needs some space. Hopefully I didn't say or do anything wrong. Brought her coffee yesterday (I don't do it randomly, she said she wanted some), and I though we were making progress. But today, she is a little cold.


I'm also a little down because it's the anniversary of my father's death and may be reading I to things too much? I haven't told her this because I know she has trouble when I express too much emotions. So, I'm finding other ways to deal with it. Think she picked up on this and is afraid to be around me while I'm down? Afraid of my emotions?
Posted by justledouxit86

Well today I was a little disappointed... She doesn't seem really interested in hanging out. I thought maybe after she asked me to hang out, we would hang out this weekend like we used to. Instead, she went with her sister to go do some stuff and is somewhat distant. Her sister and I are friends and I thought maybe she would invite me, but she's acting more like she isn't interested in hanging out. Idk... Maybe it's just because she is tired or needs some space. Hopefully I didn't say or do anything wrong. Brought her coffee yesterday (I don't do it randomly, she said she wanted some), and I though we were making progress. But today, she is a little cold.


I'm also a little down because it's the anniversary of my father's death and may be reading I to things too much? I haven't told her this because I know she has trouble when I express too much emotions. So, I'm finding other ways to deal with it. Think she picked up on this and is afraid to be around me while I'm down? Afraid of my emotions?

Sorry about your father...does that pain truly ever go away? I lost my brother a year and a half ago and my mom in October. I hope things work out for you, but if she isn't emotionally supportive is that what you want or need? Also your moon can be intense so if you can, keep it in check!
Sorry the hear about your mom and borther Sad


Wish I could say the pain goes away, but in all honesty, you just learn to live with it a little easier. It's been 27 years and still almost cripples me a little every year. I've lost all of my grandparents except for my grandfather in the last couple years, but I guess because they were all in their 90s and I saw it coming, it didn't hit me as hard. Though, it was still tuff with the one Grandma I was close to.


As far as my Virgal being emotionally supportive, it's weird because when we were just friends, she was very supportive. It's like now that we are dating, she doesn't know how to react. She will even say that... She actually said to me "I don't know what to say to make it better". However, in a way, it's been good for me. For one, I'm not leaning on just one person for emotional support so they aren't so overwhelmed. Also, her not giving into me when I'm having a pity party and babying me like some do actually helped me pull out of my depression a little faster than normal and not let it spiral.


So I guess there are some pros and cons there... I think it'll take more time for me to decide if I need more in that area. I do have supportive friends who are there for me as well, so that helps
Just wanted to give an update:


Things have gone great lately. We aren't exactly back to how the first month was, but she is opening up to me again. She is texting me all day and actually initiating the conversations as well. She wasn't allowing me to bring her coffee at her work like I used to for a while there, but she has been lately and even let me bring her lunch and hangout for a bit while she worked.


She is still a little off lately.. for example, she normally texts me when she gets home, but lately, I won't hear from her for like an hour afterwards or until I ask how's she doing or whatever. Not that it's a huge deal, I just got used to it and things have been a little different lately.


We haven't been intimate since I got back from my trip (3-4 weeks ago), though I have stayed the night at her place twice when she didn't have her son. She was really tired and didn't seem interested in being intimate, so I really didn't make a move. Usually she will initiate it or respond when I touch her, but pretty much been getting no response. She's been under a lot of stress with her ex taking her to court over custody issues and having to find a new job (with little success), so Im not too worried about it. Stress has a way of taking that drive away, as I know from experience.


The plus side is she just seems all around more like herself. (As do I feel more like MYSELF and not so depressed). She's been more open and talkative lately, even initiating conversations like she used to. She let me take her and her boy out to dinner last night and we had a great time. She is talking about future plans we had made previously, but kind of left open ended.... she is now shopping for a dress to wear when I take her to a concert in Vegas in August lol And she wants to bring my puppy to her kid's baseball tournament... Although, not sure if that means I get to go to?? Haha


So over all, we are doing great, but just isn't what it was that first month. I think we will get back to that eventually. Seems like we always take one step forward and two steps back. But life's a dance and I'm enjoying what I have with her! Im optimistic that this could become more serious down the road when we are both ready...
Oh and we got a gym membership together, which I was surprised she wanted to do. She likes the classes and I'm an ex bodybuilder (her cousin is a competitive body builder, but I never was interested in competing myself) and tend to stick with free weights... So, we won't exactly be working out "together", but I was surprised she wanted to be on the same membership together. Sounds small, but I think it may be a big thing for her... She actually turned me down the first time I asked, but then SHE asked me later in the week if I wanted to go check out a gym and we walked out with a "family membership" lol
Figure Id give another update... Always read all these topics where people never update with what's going on after a certain point and figured I'd keep mine going as long as I can, in case it helps someone else with similar Virgo relationship ups & downs lol


Sorry for kind of rambling lol I'm tired so my thoughts are a little scattered. Anyway...


The last week has been a little stressful for me, in part because my Virgo lady has been up and down all week with how distant she is with me. I've also been overanalyzing things lately due to being a little depressed (I suffer from chronic depression and PTSD). Been on an emotional rollercoaster ride, to say the least.... Lol


I think her distance has to do with the stress she is under currently. Yet she still has made an effort lately, so I try not to overthink things (still do tho, then feel bad about it :/ lol )


Funny thing is, this week I've slowed myself down a little in how much I initiate contact, partly because I've been busy and partly because she has been somewhat quiet at times and I want to give her space when she seems like she needs it. However, surprisingly she has been picking up the slack! For the most part, at least... Depends on the day.


For example, two days ago, I was having a rough day (depressed) and was a little short with her because she had been short with me all morning. She was real distant the day before too and had been acting physically distant as well (see below). I know she gets quiet sometimes when she is interacting with other people and gets overwhelmed or is super focused on something. However, because I was not in the right frame of mind to begin with, I misinterpreted it to mean she didn't want to talk to me :/


I asked her if I had done something to upset her and she said no, she was just busy. She was still short the rest of the morning and I still felt something was wrong.


Well, she surprised the hell out of me later in the day and asked, out of nowhere, if I want to go to lunch... Totally caught me off guard lol Usually I'm the one who has to ask her... She occasionally will hint that she wants to, but has never come out and asked me straight up lol


She told me she was frustrated with family the day before and had some bad news regarding some financial stuff. Usually she will tell me that kind of stuff when it happens, but she never mentioned it... which had me a little confused and I had trouble not analyzing that, even after the great lunch we had (loaded brisket baked potato... Good stuff! Big Grin lol).


I hate that I still left myself worry so much about it when she gets distant... But when I'm depressed to begin with, I guess I tend to be a little insecure. I'm working on that... I think I may still be holding back a little trust too.


I'm starting to see that a lot of my insecurities may be triggered by her distance, but aren't based in reality.
On a separate note, she made a comment on my Facebook about my puppy "needing a vacation at momma's" last Thursday, Seems like a small thing, but since we got romantic, she has completely stopped liking my posts and commenting (which had me concerned at first). Whereas when we were just friends, she commented and liked just about every post I made lol So, I was stoked about that comment, esp because of the context. She now considers it OUR puppy, which coming from her, means a lot to me, but even more so that she said it on social media... She just doesn't do that lol


Then, the next two days when I saw her, she started acting physically distant, like she did when we first started dating. As in she would speed up when I put my hand on her back while we walked, she would stand facing me so I couldn't put my arms around her and would pull away if I did. She also would walk off or turn her head so I couldn't kiss her cheek, which I always do before we part ways. All of those are things she has been comfortable with (and I think was starting to enjoy) up until recently.


So, I got a few questions about that...


Is this because of the comment she made on Facebook or is this as sign that she isnt feeling comfortable with me for some other reason?


Are these all signs that our relationship is heading in the right direction? Am I reading into things too much? Should I be worried at all?


Should I tell her how much the things she has been doing lately mean to me?


Should I ask her why the distance or just let it be for now since she is doing positive stuff as well?


I don't want to come on too strong right, because honestly I am falling for her hardcore and can barely contain my feelings for her as is... I don't want her to feel pressured, because we are still "taking it slow". Not sure I've ever felt this way before though, so the highs are REALLY high and when Im worried about how she feels, I REALLY worry lol

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