Posted by QuietSt0rm
It could go either way.. are there any more specific details to share? Does he ever warm up to you at all, even just a little bit? Or does he always give you the cold shoulder?
I can be reserved/closed off in the beginning, but once I start to catch feelings for someone and I know they feel the same, I can relax and be myself. Which is a little more on the mushy/affectionate kind.
But there are so many things that can tie into this. He may not be expressive/affectionate because of something that happened in his childhood. Or he might just not be all that emotional. It could go both ways.. Your post is kinda vague, so it's hard to tell.
How long have you been seeing him?
Posted by GoatLadyPosted by QuietSt0rm
It could go either way.. are there any more specific details to share? Does he ever warm up to you at all, even just a little bit? Or does he always give you the cold shoulder?
I can be reserved/closed off in the beginning, but once I start to catch feelings for someone and I know they feel the same, I can relax and be myself. Which is a little more on the mushy/affectionate kind.
But there are so many things that can tie into this. He may not be expressive/affectionate because of something that happened in his childhood. Or he might just not be all that emotional. It could go both ways.. Your post is kinda vague, so it's hard to tell.
How long have you been seeing him?
Your relationships must have been way ahead of mine. He never asks when he should call, he does it even if its at 2am in the morning and he expects me to drop everything for him, so he is controlling. Sometimes he will text first about something irellevant almost like its a build up to being able to call. When we speak on the phone its very cold and business like unless he's talking on a subject he enjoys, and I've noticed he always tries to put me down like he gains a feeling of superiority by doing it. I ignore it because I figured he has confidence issues, which he does, but he does like to analyse and rip apart anything that I enjoy, even if its a simple thing like I movie I liked watching.
He's never said he misses me, likes me, or loves me. And now I'm kinda working on the actions speak louder than words.
The only thing he has ever initiated is the first time we had sex, and he always kisses me goodbye which doesn't consist of passionate snogs but several pecks on the cheek or mouth, but, he does sometime come back from the direction he was walking in, or get out of his car to give me more pecks.
I'm just really confused.click to expand
Posted by P-Angel
So, let me get this straight ..........
He doesn't care to give you any affection.
He doesn't bother to communicate with you.
He isn't concerned with sharing his feelings or life with you.
But, he has you fawning over him, and running to his bed any time he does bother to call you.
What the fuck is going on? You are his whore, his booty call .. and have no awareness of it, and are actually here (and probably in real life) describing being his piece of ass and you don't even know it?
wtf .... is it where you live? ... the culture? your age? what?
Posted by GoatLady
..... but on the phone he talks to me like i'm a business colleague.
Posted by wsigafPosted by GoatLady
So why does he call me so many times in the day and night? Do you keep constant contact with people you hate, ask them what they're doing, where they are if they can reach you at home and stuff?
Dude wants to check if noone else is hitting what's between your legs.
In his mind, *you* are *his* property.click to expand
Posted by P-Angel
Why don't you try ........... living for yourself, rather than waiting with bated-breath for him to want you emotionally?
Go find something you enjoy, do it, and when he calls tell him you are doing this because you LIKE it ... good bye, hang up.
and STOP TAKING YOUR FUCKING PANTIES OFF FOR A MAN WHO DOESN'T CARE ABOUT YOU .. for christs sake
Posted by wsigaf
it depends..
what are you expecting from this situation ?
Posted by P-Angel
So, in your defense so you can keep on having excuses for him, you answer me by saying he does communicate with you, like 30 times a day.
Posted by GoatLady
..... but on the phone he talks to me like i'm a business colleague.
So long as you keep on making excuses for his behaviour, he will keep on treating you like his breathing blow up doll.click to expand
Posted by Shaka_laka_boomboom
As far as my experience goes, Capricorn females do normally become more expressive as the relationship evolves and they feel more comfortable and trust their partner more, so Im not sure your argumet is strong enough Inana. In many cases Capricorn women become even clingy, resembling their opposite Cancer females.
Posted by tooseriouslolPosted by lnana04Posted by Shaka_laka_boomboom
As far as my experience goes, Capricorn females do normally become more expressive as the relationship evolves and they feel more comfortable and trust their partner more, so Im not sure your argumet is strong enough Inana. In many cases Capricorn women become even clingy, resembling their opposite Cancer females.
I agree that we can become clingy, but as you said, it usually comes with time. How much time is up in the air, so my point is since we are more often then not called "cold" how can people assume someone being cold to us means they don't care, when can be the same, initially, at times to others?
I can see how his actions indicate that he's not into her, but you can never know if he's mimicking what he feels her behavior is towards him.
do you see mimicking of her "i miss yous" from him? - "I'm head over heels for my Scorpio man and always tell him I miss him and stuff when we talk on the phone, but he has never once been affectionate in words with me"
this is a one-sided thing. it's as clear as black and white.click to expand
Posted by Shaka_laka_boomboom
The problem discussed in this thread symbolizes the reason I dont believe that much in the succces of a capricorn female/scorpio male combo, as opposed to Capricorn male/Scorpio female.
Posted by Shaka_laka_boomboom
Yeah inana, add to that the fact scorpio males are probably as difficult to open up as cappy women and there you have the root of the problem..
Cappy women blossom almost effortlessly around guys who are not only comfortable in their own skin but are also not afraid of showing their vulnerability, guys who can laugh about themselves and make them laugh in the process too
Posted by lnana04
Did you not see my apology? I wrote that I read your reply wrong, so it's like your babbling over nothing really. And I don't really see how your posts are helpful. Your basically calling her crazy for dealing with him, when nobody is about to listen to post when they may feel like they have to defend themselves. Sorry that everyone's relationships can be as perfect or run as smoothly as yours. Your giving off a vibe that you don't and have never had any man problems. How is that attitude helpful to anyone?
Posted by LittleAquanot
P-Angel's delivery definitely is not for the faint of heart. But, she is so right. I respect the fact that she is not the type of woman who will lead other women astray by telling them what they want to hear.
GoatLady, please ditch this man. He does NOT care about you. He views you as his property, to be used by him and only him when he's good and ready. This is not about love, care and respect. This is about control, possession and sexual gratification. Deep down, you know this "relationship" isn't right. Or else, you wouldn't even be here asking the question.
Posted by P-AngelPosted by lnana04
Did you not see my apology? I wrote that I read your reply wrong, so it's like your babbling over nothing really. And I don't really see how your posts are helpful. Your basically calling her crazy for dealing with him, when nobody is about to listen to post when they may feel like they have to defend themselves. Sorry that everyone's relationships can be as perfect or run as smoothly as yours. Your giving off a vibe that you don't and have never had any man problems. How is that attitude helpful to anyone?
What makes you think I care about you, and your apologies? I wasn't even talking to you, I was talking to the Goat lady.
Secondly .... why should I give a fuck whether or not you see how my posts are helpful or not? Because I'm not even talking to you.
And lastly ... all my relationships are perfect. Why? Because as soon as their over I walk the fuck away, rather than come in here and in RL to moan and complain about what I lost.
Who in the fuck really spends their life bitching about what they don't have?
Oh yeah .... look around here, that's who.click to expand
Posted by P-Angel
Inana04 doesn't even know whether or not someone is talking to her ..... so, I'd be leary of her, if I were you goatlady.
A person who isn't in touch with reality isn't reliable.
Posted by ellessque
i don't think the op is crazy, silly or dumb.
i just don't think they are being honest. no harm. i'm guilty of not being completely honest on my virgin post to these boards.
that is another reason why this thread has been so easily derailed.
Posted by ellessque
i don't think the op is crazy, silly or dumb.
i just don't think they are being honest. no harm. i'm guilty of not being completely honest on my virgin post to these boards.
that is another reason why this thread has been so easily derailed.
Posted by P-AngelPosted by ellessque
i don't think the op is crazy, silly or dumb.
i just don't think they are being honest. no harm. i'm guilty of not being completely honest on my virgin post to these boards.
that is another reason why this thread has been so easily derailed.
Every person has an ego, so therefore every person paints the picture of themselves as being the victim or innocent ... and second, every situation that gets posted in here is being done according to how ONE side the duo percieves the events.
so, how can there be true honesty? There can't.
In this situation, though, once I started putting her back against the wall it became clear to me that she makes excuses for him being this way, rather than really expressing an interest in not enjoying this relationship.
she still wants the relationship, eventhough she's his cum-bucket .... so, what's a person in here suppose to do?
People think they are suppose to teach her how to see the signs ... when she KNOWS the fucking shit, she posted it in here, describing him as a dickhead.
A person cannot present a dickhead to us that they want ... and then get upset that we acknowledge she likes dickheads, and actually expect us to not notice that she likes it because she's still there by choice.
Seriously .... who is really that stupid?
***** looks around dxp *****
Nevermind .. I know whoclick to expand
Posted by kstarks12Posted by GoatLady
I'm head over heels for my Scorpio man and always tell him I miss him and stuff when we talk on the phone, but he has never once been affectionate in words with me, or to my face. Is that normal? We've been seeing each other since April.
Sex is great, really intense, but it always feels like I'm the one doing the running. Don't get me wrong, I don't crowd him out or nag him, we have our own homes, I'm just wondering if his lack of affection, apart from when we have sex, is because he isn't into me? HELP! He can be quite shy, but on the phone he talks to me like i'm a business colleague.
I'm a capricorn and I've had 3 Scorpio men before and my sister is a scorpio....One word: CONTROL.... And let me tell you this. As soon as you act like you don't want them...that's when they will hunt you down and be all over you. why? because they want to CONTROL you... I know this to be very true. But you're not at that point right now because your here on DXP, right?....
Here's my insight on scorpio and capricorns...
although he appreciates your vulnerability patience's, understanding and the fact that you would travel to the end of the earth for him...he still makes you suffer. He doesn't want to but he gets so caught up in a vortex of emotions that he can't help it. You bring out his intensity that Scorpios try to sit on, because it comes down to the fact that either they control it or it controls them. And a scorpio hates losing control and having an intense sexual, emotional, intellectual experience is jus the thing to cause it.
I believe scorpios have a hard time accepting all what a capricorn woman has to give because deep down, they feel they don't deserve it...therefore he loves the idea of you, but the actual makes him nervous and that's why he will restrict it to brief encounters....
His behavior has puzzled you and pained you and put you into an emotional space where us capricorns start doubting ourselves....but the danger comes when YOU GOATLADY begin to believe that you deserve what little he gives you....
My advice is...start seeing other people. yall aren't in a relationship so why not? keep your options open. Pull away and stop telling him so much about how you feel because its getting you in trouble.click to expand
Posted by ellessque
you start doubting yourselves because you can't give up your own control issues and become equals.
yeah, I said it. the only scorp man/cap woman dynamic I've seen work is buttercups because she's not afraid of herself and what she may find if she cracks open her own shell.
*ducks and waits for the rocks to be thrown*
shaka, you let me down.
Posted by ellessque
I'm saying that any evolved scorpio will give up their control to someone who meets them half way.
You have to prove yourself and as soon as you start to "move funny" (lol, I had to throw that in there)....we will retreat and become assholes for awhile.
not because we are mad at you. our egos are too big to be mad at you. it's because we are mad at ourselves for "losing" our control or "giving" it away to someone who obviously didn't know what to do with it.
Posted by kstarks12Posted by ellessque
once that happens....the retreating....it's a long road back and you'll feel like your beating your head in the wall and that you've lost a piece of yourself....
because we've taken it and tucked it somewhere safe. just to pull out and admire it later.
sounds strange but you get the jist of it.
it's kind of what i'm going thru right now with the male cap. it would take an act of congress to get me where i was 6 months ago...fully exposed and ready to hand over control.
scorps don't mind sitting in the passenger seat, really. just don't put us in the back seat.
YOU my dear, don't know your brothers well...let me school you hun.
GOATLADY - I totally feel where you are coming from with that whole- no emotional connection. cold hearted,etc...Let me give you some insight on this..
A scorpio is really NO prize. They seldom compliment, rarely communicate, and they keep their feelings carefully closeted until the object of HIS affections (this means YOU Goatlady) is willing to sign her LIFE away to him....that motherfucker wants that shit in writing, your signature in blood.....why you ask??? Because should you ever betray a scorpio, you're in for a kind of murder that's so quick and silent that its really quite painless...The worst possible penalty is if he lets you live, because what you face is the horrendous three C's: emotional cutoff, calculated revenge and the cold glance of death.
I know a scorpio TOO fucking well. My sister is one and so were the 3 men i've dated before. I escaped easily.click to expand
Posted by kstarks12wow. How did you escape?
Well because I haven't met a man i couldn't live without....and Scorpio men just tried too hard to control me.
The only time a Capricorn actually gives up control is if we believe you can actually lead us...We can very well give up control. absolutely but you better be a leader and show us something we haven't seen before because GOD help you if you don't...
I can see right through a scorpio and we are very similar in some ways but a capricorns emotional nature is in hibernation, and we suffer none of the Scorpion's passionate derailments.
Bottom line. We are tougher.click to expand
Posted by wsigafPosted by lnana04Posted by ellessque
I'm saying that any evolved scorpio will give up their control to someone who meets them half way.
You have to prove yourself and as soon as you start to "move funny" (lol, I had to throw that in there)....we will retreat and become assholes for awhile.
not because we are mad at you. our egos are too big to be mad at you. it's because we are mad at ourselves for "losing" our control or "giving" it away to someone who obviously didn't know what to do with it.
Wow, this really sounds so familiar. I never thought of it this way, but I've been through this with a Scorpio that was willing to give up his control to me, and I screwed it up and I promise you he must have hit rewind button so fast. I didn't have a clue of what was going on but he started backing it all the way up. My little head and emotions were all over the place. He was very willing in the beginning by sharing information and letting me see him in a more vulnerable way, but honestly, I think I was too self-absorbed to see what was going on. The guy was clearly opening up and revealing personal things to me and I was still wondering if he liked me or not.
I've been in a similar situation..
thanks to people like you, more people are icy/withdrawn as fuck..click to expand
Posted by wsigaf
it's a compliment..
Posted by lnana04Posted by Shaka_laka_boomboom
As far as my experience goes, Capricorn females do normally become more expressive as the relationship evolves and they feel more comfortable and trust their partner more, so Im not sure your argumet is strong enough Inana. In many cases Capricorn women become even clingy, resembling their opposite Cancer females.
I agree that we can become clingy, but as you said, it usually comes with time. How much time is up in the air, so my point is since we are more often then not called "cold" how can people assume someone being cold to us means they don't care, when can be the same, initially, at times to others?
I can see how his actions indicate that he's not into her, but you can never know if he's mimicking what he feels her behavior is towards him.click to expand
Posted by ellessquePosted by lnana04
So, elle if she straight up asked "are you seeing anyone else?" would he give an honest answer?
no, he won't. because it is obvious that she is holding something back and he will not be exposed, under any circumstance.
he's either a major player or he is not getting what he needs from her.
I think she is overexaggerating her affection a bit. those may be things she "wanted" to share but was afraid,
I think it is safe to say she is not that affectionate, especially if he didn't make the "first" move and hasn't reciprocated the feelings.
caps are extremely guarded until they feel safe. she obviously doesn't feel safe.
i'd be interested to see their charts. she has some pisces in her chart, I'm sure of it.click to expand
Posted by kstarks12Posted by GoatLady
He does communicate, he texts and calls around 30 times a day, its just cold and unemotional. We see each other about once a month.
Please tell me that you two live in separate states because if not, yes. you ARE his booty call.
uggh i hate scorpio men. yucckkkkk!!!!click to expand
Posted by ellessque
welcome back!
and as promised, i'm truly sorry if i offended you.
you can pull your charts at www.cafeastrology.com, you don't need the birth time, just the year and where you were born. if you want me to help you, i can do it privately thru a pm and then we can post it on the board.
Posted by ellessque
welcome back!
and as promised, i'm truly sorry if i offended you.
you can pull your charts at www.cafeastrology.com, you don't need the birth time, just the year and where you were born. if you want me to help you, i can do it privately thru a pm and then we can post it on the board.