EXTROVERTED SCORPION MALE-sex or genuine interest?

Posted by cancer12
...i'd like to call him just because i miss him but i'm afraid. all this happened this friday night...today is sunday -
but i keep reading that this may seem like i'm chasing or that i'm weak or needy to a scorp. i've liked him for a while but i just don't want to scare him...or is it that a guy that is also genuinely interested won't be scared but would welcome this?

Posted by Gumshoe

Some are. Some aren't.
... So I ask you: if he's shown himself to be this open with you, why not return the gift, match his openness?
In other words, simply ask him. Word around town is that communication is often the means we use to know each other better and establish bonds.

Posted by Gumshoe

"i feel that if i like someone and i'm interested, that mind games should be out the door." Pay attention to your own wording, it might clue you in to what feelings you might be hiding from yourself, what might be going on under the surface.
"I feel that if I like someone" + "games *should* be out the door." There's a whole lotta hedging, uncertainty in the first quoted fragment. Compare yours to this: "When I like someone" - do you see the difference? Now look at the second quote and compare it to this: "games *go* out the door."
Please keep in mind that I'm not saying this is how *you* should have felt or how you should've phrased your thoughts- I'm pointing out something that your Scorp has long since picked up on.
Moving on.
"but i keep reading that this may seem like i'm chasing or that i'm weak or needy to a scorp." For every passage written about how Scorps detest weakness in a woman, I can offer you a passage that details how they love -how they *need* - to see vulnerability in their SOs.
In short, deal with the flesh-and-blood man before you, the one with whom you have experience. Not with an archetype you've read in an astrology book.
Just ask him.
(And Ps- expect to be thrown off a great deal more than this. This is training wheels stuff.)

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Posted by Gumshoe

Thank you, PhoenixRising. I'm Gumshoe, and pleased to somewhat officially meet you. (I lurked for a long while before signing up.)

Posted by Gumshoe

"i feel that if i like someone and i'm interested, that mind games should be out the door." Pay attention to your own wording, it might clue you in to what feelings you might be hiding from yourself, what might be going on under the surface.
"I feel that if I like someone" + "games *should* be out the door." There's a whole lotta hedging, uncertainty in the first quoted fragment. Compare yours to this: "When I like someone" - do you see the difference? Now look at the second quote and compare it to this: "games *go* out the door."
Please keep in mind that I'm not saying this is how *you* should have felt or how you should've phrased your thoughts- I'm pointing out something that your Scorp has long since picked up on.
Moving on.
"but i keep reading that this may seem like i'm chasing or that i'm weak or needy to a scorp." For every passage written about how Scorps detest weakness in a woman, I can offer you a passage that details how they love -how they *need* - to see vulnerability in their SOs.
In short, deal with the flesh-and-blood man before you, the one with whom you have experience. Not with an archetype you've read in an astrology book.
Just ask him.
(And Ps- expect to be thrown off a great deal more than this. This is training wheels stuff.)

Posted by PhoenixRising

Posted by cancer12
...i'd like to call him just because i miss him but i'm afraid. all this happened this friday night...today is sunday -
but i keep reading that this may seem like i'm chasing or that i'm weak or needy to a scorp. i've liked him for a while but i just don't want to scare him...or is it that a guy that is also genuinely interested won't be scared but would welcome this?

See this is the very odd thing...if I am truly interested in someone, really feeling them, a call so soon would be very welcomed. Yet, if I'm iffy about you or not really "there" yet a call so soon would make me feel like "slow the hell down". Not fair to the other person because it's make things more complicated than it needs to be, but there you have it. The point I am trying to make is these traits that make up a Scorpio can't be followed to the letter because it only applies in certain circumstances.
Nothing wrong with calling just to say hi and share your/ask about his weekend if you choose. Perhaps save the "I missed you" piece for now.
My

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Posted by cancer12
p.s. sooo i decided to just dial him a few minutes ago - i was going to ask how he was and see how the convo went BUT he didn't answer - i didn't even bother leaving a voice mail.
at times i wonder if all of that night with him opening and sharing and being so sweet to me was just bc he was hoping i'd spread my legs for him.
thinking of just walk away from this, it just doesn't seem worth it to stress over a dude that just doesn't give a hoot...so inconsistent - i guess if i don't hear from him by the end of the night then i'm cutting him off completely.
would love your inputs scorpies..what do you think?

Posted by Gumshoe

Cancer12, I'm not a Scorp, and I've got only one Scorp placement (descendent), so keep that in mind. That said, I also have to say that you really seem to be doing a number on yourself. You have to calm down and get a grip, for your own sake.
It seems to me that you're not aware of just how much of your reactions since you saw him issue from the knowledge of his whore days. More than anything, that's what I'm reading in your posts. Things like this: "i was walking away from him and didn't even realize we didn't say goodbye." That call sent you in quite the tizzy; it seems you've taken that incident as confirmation that, yes, he is still a hopeless whore, in spite of what he told you.
For now, I think your energies would better used in sorting out the contents of your own mind. Maybe ease up a little on the "we had such a connection, why this why that why this what that" -ad naseum. Focus on why you're so easily spooked. Be honest with yourself. If it turns out that this Scorp has lied, well, good riddance to him. Who needs a fool like that?
On the other hand, if you did feel such a strong connection, then why is your cage so easily rattled? Sounds to me that you were the one who departed like a bat outta hell, not him. That's just the way I'm reading it.
"i honestly thought he really liked me and i just wasn't expecting what feels like a gap." *You* are part of the reason for that gap, certainly at this point. What I mean by that is: you could've called him. You could've left a message. Instead you're waiting on *him* as if you had zero volition, zero say. I don't understand that. And you're doing it, it seems, because of his past and because of what you've read about Scorp men. Not fair, at least not to my mind.
More on its way...

Posted by Gumshoe

Things like this: "i was walking away from him and didn't even realize we didn't say goodbye." That call sent you in quite the tizzy; it seems you've taken that incident as confirmation that, yes, he is still a hopeless whore, in spite of what he told you.
For now, I think your energies would better used in sorting out the contents of your own mind. Maybe ease up a little on the "we had such a connection, why this why that why this what that" -ad naseum. Focus on why you're so easily spooked. Be honest with yourself. If it turns out that this Scorp has lied, well, good riddance to him. Who needs a fool like that?
On the other hand, if you did feel such a strong connection, then why is your cage so easily rattled? Sounds to me that you were the one who departed like a bat outta hell, not him. That's just the way I'm reading it.

Posted by Gumshoe

Also, you seem to have one hell of an imagination. So try this: untie your mind from the train tracks that you yourself have tied it to.

Posted by PhoenixRising
Hmmm, well??_first off there is a difference between assuming that your night together didn't mean the "same thing" vs. it not meaning "anything" to him at all--and I know I am assuming here, but based on your mood now, I think you're feeling the latter. I know nothing about your Scorp, so I'll speak from my own perspective.
You mentioned he shared things with you he hasn't shared with other people, that??s would be a huge deal for me???because I share very little about myself and here you have this man yapping about all sorts of personal things. You are not the only one feeling vulnerable I am sure. Moreover, you seem pretty confident in your ability to speak your mind, pin people (at least this guy) to the wall and demand some answers (???are you still a man whore?? comes to mind). That is something that would most certainly get my attention and respect, even if I don??t like what you??re saying. The last person that was able to look me square in the eyes and see things I thought I had been able to hid from everyone shook me to the core. I didn??t like it at all, but loved it at the same time because??? I mean wow! Not something just anyone can do with me. Someone ???getting?? you and still wanting to come back for more despite all the various flaws you think and know you actually have (Scorp can be their own worse critics) is a tricky thing to deal with. Insecurities creep in. Similar to this one:
"I'm really glad u kissed me back"??_ This to me says ???I feel insecure about what you might be feeling about me right now??, but hey, this is just my opinion.
I think right now he may be just doing a double take at everything that went down. He may be feeling equally as vulnerable and a little insecure because you're not the average girl he can just pull anything with. People like that make you really stop and think.

Posted by PhoenixRising
(con't) However, in saying all of this I am not saying some things don't need to be sorted out. The ???wife?? comment most certainly needs to be discussed, I??m wondering why you didn??t ask at the time he said it. Now it seems you have gotten yourself into a tizzy over what exactly ? What exactly do you want to cuss him about and what is it you *feel* he has ???done to you?? that deserves cussing? Nothing that I??ve seen so far, unless I am missing something.
HTH!

Posted by Gumshoe

Cancer12, I'm not a Scorp, and I've got only one Scorp placement (descendent), so keep that in mind. That said, I also have to say that you really seem to be doing a number on yourself. You have to calm down and get a grip, for your own sake.
It seems to me that you're not aware of just how much of your reactions since you saw him issue from the knowledge of his whore days. More than anything, that's what I'm reading in your posts. Things like this: "i was walking away from him and didn't even realize we didn't say goodbye." That call sent you in quite the tizzy; it seems you've taken that incident as confirmation that, yes, he is still a hopeless whore, in spite of what he told you.
For now, I think your energies would better used in sorting out the contents of your own mind. Maybe ease up a little on the "we had such a connection, why this why that why this what that" -ad naseum. Focus on why you're so easily spooked. Be honest with yourself. If it turns out that this Scorp has lied, well, good riddance to him. Who needs a fool like that?
On the other hand, if you did feel such a strong connection, then why is your cage so easily rattled? Sounds to me that you were the one who departed like a bat outta hell, not him. That's just the way I'm reading it.
"i honestly thought he really liked me and i just wasn't expecting what feels like a gap." *You* are part of the reason for that gap, certainly at this point. What I mean by that is: you could've called him. You could've left a message. Instead you're waiting on *him* as if you had zero volition, zero say. I don't understand that. And you're doing it, it seems, because of his past and because of what you've read about Scorp men. Not fair, at least not to my mind.
More on its way...

Posted by incandescentcancer

Posted by Gumshoe

Things like this: "i was walking away from him and didn't even realize we didn't say goodbye." That call sent you in quite the tizzy; it seems you've taken that incident as confirmation that, yes, he is still a hopeless whore, in spite of what he told you.
For now, I think your energies would better used in sorting out the contents of your own mind. Maybe ease up a little on the "we had such a connection, why this why that why this what that" -ad naseum. Focus on why you're so easily spooked. Be honest with yourself. If it turns out that this Scorp has lied, well, good riddance to him. Who needs a fool like that?
On the other hand, if you did feel such a strong connection, then why is your cage so easily rattled? Sounds to me that you were the one who departed like a bat outta hell, not him. That's just the way I'm reading it.

Delightfully gullible. The Cancer girl has it work out precisely, she acknowledges her attraction to this man and also the fact that he will most likely cheat. I think she figures that there is opportunity for sex and not a relationship. She will ultimately take a call on whether she will give in to her attraction, have sex and move on or not. You on the other hand would want her to build up delusions in her mind that there is potential for more and lose clarity.

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