He is a cheater! Wld you let the other girl know?

I wouldn't.

As in my case, the girl has a slim chance on seeing him again. She lives oversees. If she wants to dream away with a one week fling and if she was happy and as long as it doesn't harm her in the long run -- LET HER DREAM AWAY! 🙂

But I know from past experience from this guy who I was with that his previous girl kept on letting all the other new girls know. She started emailing them. He told me this himself. However, he put it in a way that SHE was the one cheating on him, and that SHE kept on coming back to him by stalking him. He said, "you wouldn't know, FUMi, all the ways I tried to get rid of her, but she kept on coming back. As soon as she knows I am with you, she will find you and contact you too."


One thing I learned through my online searches of how to find out or deal with a cheating partner is, NEVER let them know until you have hard evidence. Then let them go unless you want to get your ass continued being cheated. Don't tell them your ways of finding out, because they will get better and better in hiding the evidence and continue fooling you.


So would you let the other girl know??

sorry for the highlight... didn't realize I had not closed up the bracket.


Loyalist --

How will the other girl know me? How will she know he was in MY arms just a couple of days ago...

rflmao

energy projections

This kind of head-game playing is what she sends out ..... same kind of men hear it and respond.



I especially like this one .. it's pulled over from one of her threads on the Cap board, it was dated early March of this year ..

"The day before yesterday he was pretty nasty to me online. I told him off... then he said.. "I'm luv'n this"... will see you soon... kisses. Yesterday I was online. He logged in with a hello -- I think only to test if I was still game -- then he requested cybersex. I said, am not into these things... If you want sex, let's make a date. He said, I have to leave... I said, fine. Today he ignored me online. I can't play these games any longer."


She told him off online because he was being mean to her
He liked it that she told him off ... signed her off with kisses
He came back online to her and asked for cybersex, which she declined because she's not into it
She told him that if he wants to sex her up, just ask for it = a date, she said
He declined her eager offer of sex .....
Next day, or whenever 'today' is, he ignored her online .. which means she wasn't really tired of playing his game, was she?

If she was indeed tired of playing his game, she wouldn't have been waiting online for him to even ignore her, would she?

She can't play his games, she says .... but, if he wants to have sex, just ask to see her in person and she'll give it to him.




These are the kinds of vibes she sends out to men .. this is her energy.

Is it really so shocking that it's these kinds of men who are picking up on her scent?

On her other thread on the Scorp board, she says the below at the end of a post. In this post she admits to stalking him ..



... STALKING ....



"It's fair game! If he is a cheating ASS, then all rules apply and that is how I found out, honey."


And in her mind that is so deluded, she actually believes that this is fair play .. why does she think it's fair play? She said "game" !!!!


Because to her it's a game.


Don't let yourself be confused into thinking she keeps finding herself involved with players, while she remains innocent .... she, herself, calls it a 'game' .. and stalks.

Or how about this one, from the other thread ...


"He made me wash his laundry just a few days before she came. I organized his house. Can you imagine what a low character such types have? So no... the best thing is walking away from these guys. Yesterday I was thinking on perhaps telling him that I loved him just to see his reaction."



He made her? Made her do his laundry and organize his house.

Made her do it.

And then talk about him having low character ..... he can't make her do anything. If she does his laundry and organizes his house then it's because she CHOSE to do it.

Then she thinks about telling him just how much she loves just to see his reaction ...



Fum is the Player, that point should be quite clear with how she fucked over Virgo man with her head-games ... if this CapMan is playing her, then this is what she deserves, because this is what she is calling to be brought to herself for playing other men.



karma is a bitch

virgogotme --

very good question that is. I can't answer, as I do not know myself.

I think there ALWAYS is some risk involved when starting up a relationship. There also is always some indication if the guy is long-term or not. Still... I could never have guessed it with my VirGuy relation. He was my friend of 3+ years before then.

With this one... not sure. He was apparently cheated on himself before. He told me his stories and demanded loyalty. I asked him for the same in return.


So.. don't know what to say, VGM

P-Angel

You are Nut Case, honey!

I don't get the whole stalking thing either, PP .... how desperate it would make you look.


Where's a person dignity and pride .... that they are so pathetic to have that they would have to make such a display of theirselves as if to say ...... why doesn't he want me anymore, now I feel so pathetic for it that I must go follow him because he is so deserving of this attention now, because then if I give him this attention then maybe he will give me a second pity change at him.

Loyalist --

I think that is a very sensible approach. I won't say anything to this girl as she lives oversees. If the girl would be here in Toronto and I think he might be playing with a few at the same time... (I am almost sure after this incident that he is), then I may have taken your advice.


It's a tricky situation though -- more like live and learn.


I'd be curious to know if anyone on these boards has taken such initiative by informing the other girl and if it worked out. Usually girls seem to attack the other girl.

Not my way anyway... I prefer to walk.

Pee -- this thread is not meant for you, Why don't you get off!


Virgogotme -- we all have sagas, that's why these boards are for.

Prince -- good point on STALKING!

Now my question: WHY do people CHEAT on someone and think they can get away with playing with them for as long?


Why do people STEAL, and think they can get away from taking away someone elses belonging?

No loyalist. As I said, I am not going to do anything.

My curiousity is on those who have done it the way his ex did it. She made it her duty to let all the new girls in his life know what he is about. The weirdness of her is that she keeps on coming back to him like after 5-6 months or so.... He said, he moved away and she found her.


Anyway, I'm just simply curious how people reacted, who have been exposed to similar situation. If my post helps anyone out there ... then I will have done my share. I am sure there are plenty. Especially nowadays with the online dating. I like to bring the attention to cheating and the thereafter.

No it's not me, Loyalist. The long-term girlfriend before me did it. He saw her last in November 08. They were in ON/OFF relationship for 4+ years.


Am not going to let the girl from Germany know. I don't think she'd believe me anyway. I wouldn't have believed his ex either if she had contacted me.

I know his reason why he picked the girl from germany, because he wants to get some training for a business he wanted to open up with me here. I suggested he can get that training here... but I didn't think he would be of such low character although I suspected as soon as I saw a girl from Germany on his facebook. But I didn't want to appear like the jealous type, I couldn't help mentioning that to him. I asked, so you planning on going to germany? Then he made his friends private... and that is when I started suspecting.

🙂 Yes, Loyalist... he is smart; I have to give him that.


I guess it is a personal life choice the way he operates. He is a 47 year old man who has not succeeded in much so far. Has nothing he owns. So not sure how far he thinks he can live this way. He tells girls he is 40.. that's at least what he told me... . He asked me if he looks 40 and I couldn't lie to him. I said No. He said eff* you serious? I said yes... you told me you were 40, but I never believed you.

LOL...


May I ask please, what is your birtsign, Loyalist?

It's great talking to you. Like your short-to-the-points... 😛

47? yeah, he knows what he is doing.

oh yeah... he does, pathfinder...

@FUMRedFairy_tales

Wow.

I hope he realizes, that at a certain age (for men), "other" women only want men for their money. I hope he has some if he wants to throw away someone who truly cared about him. He's not getting any younger.

He has zero capital. He is unemployed living off his credit card. I wanted to make it work for us.

The day I broke up with him, I told him that I tried contacting him for the past week. I had researched all the whereabouts about building the business he wanted. I was going to help with the financing. When I saw what a big liar he was, I just decided right there. I told him, "I can't trust you anymore. It's over CAP man!" And I was well-aware what that means to a CAP.


Sorry.. but regardless of being intelligent, he sure has an amount of stupidity. It's called being self-destructive. But that's by choice. He must be using his little brain majority of times.


Now I can only be thankful that I did not go into anything with him. That was quite the close call, hun.

One question Fumi, are you the girlfriend or the piece of ass on the side?

moon_eyes--

very good point. Not only will I get blamed, I don't think someone should be so stupid to take an oversees trip to eff a man and then cry over it that they will never see each other again. So... lost cause anyway.



************

Queenscorp -- I was the supposed girlfriend. At many occasions he mentioned of meeting my family, etc. Just a little over a week ago, he even asked if I could rent him a place in my house. lol... I don't know how he would have done it with the cheating part. There is obviously something missing in his head.

On to the next victim .. who shall it be?

A Leo perhaps?

Ok I'll spill. I've let the cat out of the bag once with my Libra ex. He was two timing me with a Taurus chick. I found out she was related to a really close friend of mine. I let my friend know what was going on and he got pissed and set up a meeting. I opted to forward her the text messages that I'd gotten from him showing her the dates and times so she knew what was going on.
Silly girl thought I was making it up. Um yeah, I randomly just picked HER bf to accuse of cheating on her and made up text messages to get him in hot water. Whatever. If she wanted to be stupid and not believe me they deserved each other. He knew I knew what was going on though and told her I was a crazy ex. We WERE together when he started sleeping with her.
From what I know through what a few of my friends (who run in his circle) he cheats on her regularly. The sad thing is she is so desperate she chooses to stay with him. Sadder yet is she has a son from a previous relationship and she pushes the little boy on him. The kid calls him Daddy. Ugh.
He tried to contact me not long ago and boldly asked if we could "hook up" sometime. The though crossed my mind to forward her those text messages but why bother?

*thought* typos!!!!

Ok I'll spill...If she wanted to be stupid and not believe me they deserved each other.

I would say it. but I won't make a big job out of it. Ony if I 'd like and am in the right mood.
People have a right on truth. They also have a right on peace. so you never know.

the story of boys overseas. this happens every day. they have girl friends here and marry that girl there. It must the big love if I ever go for such a men.

But I don't understand one point. did we not have a sexual revolution in 60ies? Does sleeping around mean cheating? this is just sex. If he has no job, then he cannot maintain her at the moment. but he can maintain his sexual desire. and what is so wrong about making it a little romantic for the woman who is not overseas?

Now if we feel betrayed cause he did not tell us he had someone overseas, this comes because they have always someone overseas (family urges) but never know when they are rich enough to settle down. Men are so simple.

thank you for the beans, Ginger... sorry to hear the cheating. It feels sickening once you are sure of his act.

I think what we need to be careful of in a new relationships is the story of the EX they bring us. This guy was telling me of his crazy ex who was stalking on him. I think it happened to him with two exes, but the steady crazy ex is another scorp girl. He also accused her of cheating on him. When I found out she was scorp, I was a bit in doubt how much truth HIS telling would entail, but I gave him the benefit of the doubt. Not everyone is the same. He told me a very believable story that she came to him one day with hickies on her neck and body. Later when confronted she admitted coming to him from the arms of another man. So it was quite believable she was cheating on him. But obviously, she was obsessed with him at the same time...


Coming to your story -- Unbelievable that your ex guy has the audicity of asking you for hooking up again. No surprise actually because these guys are what they are. You are right... why bother? Although why not— Let HER deal with it. All it needs is a forward. At the time, she believed in the crazy ex crap when she knew you were still with him, but now you have some update for her. However... some women will just allow themselves to be treated this way.

I think she deserves to know. I'm in the same position... I don't want to get bothered, but mainly because she is not close-by or else I would have warned her and then pulled away.

But I don't understand one point. did we not have a sexual revolution in 60ies? Does sleeping around mean cheating? this is just sex. If he has no job, then he cannot maintain her at the moment. but he can maintain his sexual desire. and what is so wrong about making it a little romantic for the woman who is not overseas?

Now if we feel betrayed cause he did not tell us he had someone overseas, this comes because they have always someone overseas (family urges) but never know when they are rich enough to settle down. Men are so simple.

Dwelling --

I do like your revolutionary ideas. However in my case, he met the oversees gal for the first time here. He never was in a **women-deprived** war. He hooked up with her AFTER me. I am close-by. Our sex was great. Two days before he had ME in his arms, and two days later SHE was in his arms here in toronto.

I think I'm missing the meaning of the 60s in this case, because that is not the arrangement we had. Some may still continue the hippie mentality, but that was NOT the case in our arrangement. He demanded loyalty from me and I demand the same.

Anyway it's over. He deserves what he has now, which is whatever he has in the end. If he'd be smart, he would have had a loyal girl, a job, and a better life- style . Brainless moron he is.

thank you for explaining. now I understand the background better than before.

BTW I read one day Archer saying cap men can also do such good job (maintain several women at the same time).

"However in my case, he met the oversees gal for the first time here. He never was in a **women-deprived** war. He hooked up with her AFTER me. I am close-by. Our sex was great. Two days before he had ME in his arms, and two days later SHE was in his arms here in toronto."


You don't know any of that ^^^^^


In fact, you only know what he tells you ... and he's a liar, according to you.



Can we say gullible? The Brooklyn Bridge is for sale. Oh yeah, he had to working up a business plan he wanted for you to finance for him ... so maybe selling you the Brooklyn Bridge could be an actuality.


Apparantly the sex wasn't so great was it? Because he apparantly had to look for something better in Germany.



Just waiting for you to either rescind all you've said about him, or have a change of heart and decide to give him another go (because there might be more drama yet with this CapMan), or start new threads about Leo man and all his drama you so innocently find yourself into with him.

One of those three ^^^^^^ ....

Posted by DwellingOnMove
BTW I read one day Archer saying cap men can also do such good job (maintain several women at the same time).

Dwelling -- Archer is quite right.

Pee -- Yes I know ALL of that!



You sound like a buzz within the sound of drums... why don't you go to the corner, honey... continue twiddling your thumbs for the day when YOUR Virgo Guy will EVER touch you. That day -- I can assure you -- will never come!


He already touches nice girls on his Driving Trips and enjoys the scent of their cleavages.

Good Day! Get a life!

Fumi why do you care if she knows if the two of you are done? He has the issue not her. She isn't your socalled boyfriend he is. Did he say he was your boyfriend? PR are you assuming?

Fumi why do you care if she knows if the two of you are done? He has the issue not her. She isn't your socalled boyfriend he is. Did he say he was your boyfriend? PR are you assuming?

Queenscorpio --

there must be a misunderstanding. That girl doesn't know about me. She is as innocent as I was.

HE knows since yesterday that I am aware of that letter now. That's all I said.


Yes, he was my boyfriend. He said that at many occasions. He demanded what he wanted from his girlfriend. He was questioning of who the guys on my facebook were. If I was talking to any of them. If I had posts from any of them, he would question why he said what he said. When I got a phone call, he used to stop what he was doing and paying all his attention to my phone calls. He was like the obsessive, possessive boyfriend. I didn't mind, because he told me how much he had dealt with his previous girl cheating on him. So I thought he will feel more comfortable over time with me and he will learn trusting me.




Not sure what you mean by "PR are you assuming?"

If you are talking about P-Angel. She is a pest! She is a neurotic woman who has nothing better to do then putting stories together to manipulate people's minds. That's why I desregard her comments. They should not be taken seriously in the least. She needs therapy. So if you are asking if PA is assuming, yes... she is making up and connecting events in her sick mind.

47 no job, living off credit? and you actually wanted to date this guy? wow.
sorry nothing to add here, just wow.

Virgogotme --

I was being kind to PA as I am to anyone else on here. I wasn't aware so much of her rep. She always pops up from somewhere at any given time. Her life is these boards. So when I saw her posting, I appreaciated her efforts -- NOT because I agreed with her. I was fairly greatful. If that is what you mean by "witnessing my rapore".


PA becomes increasingly abusive to people on these boards if she realizes your weakness. That is what she feeds on. She is doing this to countless people on these boards who are unaware of her personality.


I was weak then, because Virgo Man was very important to me. His loss put me into deep depression. You don't know me in real life, so you can't know the extend of his disappearing affected me. PA was a nasty b i t c h! She started swearing excessively on all my threads. I don't HAVE to take her abuse. NO one should.


SO AM ANNOUNCING TO EVERYONE : I've changed my mind on how I am going to treat her here. Her "input" is best left out than taken.

Why I deleted my previous account is that I had enough -- not because of some kind of cover-up.

Why I created a similar but not too different screen name is that I decided to come back to the boards after about 2 months, because I like posting here and asking or receiving for advice.

I don't like explaining this over and over again. I thought I already did this at several occasions. VGM, perhaps you missed my posts.

Nassau --

Unemployed people are people too.


He was unemployed for a month then. Now it has become 4 months. Wow... time passes.

ha ha, i know they are people, is that your criteria for dating? wanted bi-pedal carbon-based lifeform, no visible means of support necessary!

Posted by Queenscorpio
Fumi why do you care if she knows if the two of you are done? He has the issue not her. She isn't your socalled boyfriend he is. Did he say he was your boyfriend? PR are you assuming?

Valid point .... what difference does it make about the girl.


Also what is valid is the so-called .. "I'm done, it's over" words claimed by Fum in here and on Cap board .. and then continuous energy being put into obssessing over the details.

Drama is as drama does .... and VGM is correct, this situation is very similar to Virgo man.

She fucked Virgo man's head over .. and now this .. now she is in possession of a letter in which this girl wrote to CapMan .. a PERSONAL LETTER from one person to another, and Fum has this letter .. why?


To have something to fuck him with?

Yes, indeed ... her antics in this case are very similar to how she fucked Virgo Man .. similar in that everything she is doing is pre-meditated for future fucking.