He is just not that into me?

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pinkrose8
@pinkrose8
11 Years

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That's where it gets confusing. He tells me doesn't like talking on the phone that much, he gives off the impression that he needs space. So I give him space. I did let him know how I feel about him.

We also talked about love, he said he doesn't believe instant attraction. Love and trust has to be built over time.

I know I can't judge people and situation based on astological signs, but he believes he fits into the Scorpio traits really well (as a Scorpio.)

just put it this way, we are not in our teens or 20s...
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frostey91
@frostey91
11 Years1,000+ Posts

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Maybe he's looking for the one and your not the one. Small shit can get reactions out of Scopio's. Many of them can change so unexpectedly. I know a Scorpio guy very well that was in a realationship for 3 years I don't know much about the beginning but he considered leaving her. He considered many opitions but he would revert back bc. he knew she was the one. I talk to Scorpio's many times about their relationships and they go into viviid detail what they like what they don't. I have noticed if they break up they usually go back to that person. This has happened at least twice recently.
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pinkrose8
@pinkrose8
11 Years

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He said he doesn't believe in The One. He said knowing a person takes a long time. He did say he liked me earlier in the relationship. Just now, he said he doesn't have romantica feelings for me. He said he should have these romantic feelings by now, if it is there.

It was confusing for me. Because to me, if a guy into you, he'd want to spend time with you, and be happy to see you. Very simple.I felt that only to a certain extent from him. I do know that he tried to make time for me. I feel that he's (and he admitted it, too) very independent, he gives me the impression taht he wants someone who's independent and clingy at the right moments...
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PhoenixRising
@PhoenixRising
13 Years10,000+ Posts

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Posted by pinkrose8
Long story short, during this time, he used the word relationship to describe us, and he alluded us to the possibility to bf and gf. He asked how I feel about things, I said good. He said he like/is fine with taking things slow and I agree. Since we were on the topic, I asked what he thinks of how we should address each other to other people. That's when he paused and kind of waited to see my reaction. (Back tracking a bit, a few weeks back I asked him if he remembered when our first date, as in what the date was. He said he doesn't remember, he asked if I did. I said I don't either, but I actually do. ) He said we only dated for 4 months, that's when I said, it's actually 5, because we went on our first date back in XXX. That's when he got upset. He said I lied about not remembering. I apologized, and said it wasn't my intention to lie or to hurt him



*clear throat* Umm, yeah.....*side eye* what happened between here^^^^:

Posted by pinkrose8
(that's the gist of it.) He said he doesn't feel that we are bf/gf level yet.


and here^^^?

"that's the gist of it" is the equivalent of "yadda, yadda, yadda". You're leaving something out.


P.S. I will be honest, I had a bad reaction to this:
Posted by pinkrose8
Since we were on the topic, I asked what he thinks of how we should address each other to other people. That's when he paused and kind of waited to see my reaction. (Back tracking a bit, a few weeks back I asked him if he remembered when our first date, as in what the date was. He said he doesn't remember, he asked if I did. I said I don't either, but I actually do. )


as well, even before I read his response. I am not surprised he did too.


Posted by pinkrose8
I feel like, he basically got me to like him, and then he decides to cut me lose....Is this typical of a Scorpio guy?
click to expand



*sigh*
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pinkrose8
@pinkrose8
11 Years

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Thank you frostey91 and Impulsv for your kind words.

Twirling Strawberry, it's too long to type out here. I owned up to what I said, I told him it wasn't my intention to play games. Whether or not he really got over it or not, it's up to him.

Not to sound defensive, there were times he said different things at different time, I understand what was going on and let it go.

I gave it my best shot.
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PhoenixRising
@PhoenixRising
13 Years10,000+ Posts

Comments: 19 ยท Posts: 19733 ยท Topics: 48
Posted by pinkrose8
PR - No, I didn't leave anything out RE: the gist of it. Just to long to type out our conversation and what I said in my apology.

No big conspiracy. My original post is what I can best summarize.



You're dealing with a Scorp. The devil is in the details. His reaction seemed a little 180, so that's why I asked. Something as small as saying to him "I don't get why you're so upset, it was just a little white lie" vs. a sincere apology might have made a big difference in his ability to let that go. All depends on what occurred in the "gist". He might have been on the fence and that little stunt send him firmly fixed to the other side *shurg*.

Anyway, it's cool. You're over it and it was a meaningless lie, right? Emphasis on meaningless. Why even do it then? That's the point that is being missed. Thing is, you created and thread to find out what he reaction was all about. Maybe I misunderstood the OP.

sarcasm/

I often read people posting about Scorps taking things too seriously. It was just a little white lie, etc as if it's nothing. Yeah, not the way most Scorps work. It may not be a big deal to you, but it is to a Scorp. It just is what it is. If little white lies work in your world, cool then don't hang with a Scorp. Quite simple.
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PhoenixRising
@PhoenixRising
13 Years10,000+ Posts

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And to be clear to avoid a debate over whether Scorps lie or not and the hypocrisy of it all, that isn't the point I was trying to make. Are Scorps capable of lying. Yes. Do they? Some do, yes. However, generalizing what Scorps are capable of doing and what some Scorp have done is not relevant to this situation. If you are in a relationship with a Scorp that has NOT lied to you or played games, then it would be more than fair for said Scorp to expect the same from you.
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pinkrose8
@pinkrose8
11 Years

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PR - thanks for your response. Yes, I did give him an sincere apology. I am human, screwed up and said something different than what it should be, and I explained to him why, because I didn't want him to take it the wrong way.

I created a thread to not only find out what this lie is about, this is part of what happened. It's okay, doesn't matter now. I am just sad, because I really did try. If this one thing send him fixedly firmly to the other side, well... I am speechless. I don't know one person in this world who is perfect and never made a mistake. I am not saying it [white lies] shouldn't be taken seriously, but we are humans, we don't always make the best decision in a split of a second.

Again, not trying to sound defensive... but that's my point of view. I get what are you saying, and I did apologize and explain.
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pinkrose8
@pinkrose8
11 Years

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Posted by PhoenixRising
And to be clear to avoid a debate over whether Scorps lie or not and the hypocrisy of it all, that isn't the point I was trying to make. Are Scorps capable of lying. Yes. Do they? Some do, yes. However, generalizing what Scorps are capable of doing and what some Scorp have done is not relevant to this situation. If you are in a relationship with a Scorp that has NOT lied to you or played games, then it would be more than fair for said Scorp to expect the same from you.



There were times when he said one thing and then another. I understand why he was doing that, I didn't call him out on it and let it go. That's just me.
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PhoenixRising
@PhoenixRising
13 Years10,000+ Posts

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Posted by pinkrose8
PR - thanks for your response. Yes, I did give him an sincere apology. I am human, screwed up and said something different than what it should be, and I explained to him why, because I didn't want him to take it the wrong way.

I created a thread to not only find out what this lie is about, this is part of what happened. It's okay, doesn't matter now. I am just sad, because I really did try. If this one thing send him fixedly firmly to the other side, well... I am speechless. I don't know one person in this world who is perfect and never made a mistake. I am not saying it [white lies] shouldn't be taken seriously, but we are humans, we don't always make the best decision in a split of a second.

Again, not trying to sound defensive... but that's my point of view. I get what are you saying, and I did apologize and explain.



Okay, well that's all you can do. I did state "might". It might have very well been what he said it was. The lack of a connection. If so, you don't want a person that is just going through the motions.

You are right, no one is perfect and that may be his lesson to learn.
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PhoenixRising
@PhoenixRising
13 Years10,000+ Posts

Comments: 19 ยท Posts: 19733 ยท Topics: 48
Posted by pinkrose8
Posted by PhoenixRising
And to be clear to avoid a debate over whether Scorps lie or not and the hypocrisy of it all, that isn't the point I was trying to make. Are Scorps capable of lying. Yes. Do they? Some do, yes. However, generalizing what Scorps are capable of doing and what some Scorp have done is not relevant to this situation. If you are in a relationship with a Scorp that has NOT lied to you or played games, then it would be more than fair for said Scorp to expect the same from you.



There were times when he said one thing and then another. I understand why he was doing that, I didn't call him out on it and let it go. That's just me.
click to expand




Okay, so why didn't you? I'm just curious.
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JBG
@JBG
12 Years

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IMO that lie was not even worth mentioning bc it was so trivial. There's no way he would have ended a relationship he wanted over something so small. I think he's just not feeling a relationship with you for the long haul. Y'all aren't that young, do he doesn't have time to play kid games and lie and sell dreams. He told you exactly what he meant.

Us women are so funny, we want men to be open and honest with is even if it hurts, but when they are, we question and over analyze their honesty. We think he just doesn't want to put it out there bc he doesn't want to be hurt or he's hiding bc he's not sure how we feel. Nope, he was just being plain old honest.

& as for all this scorpio stuff about them letting people go for minor stuff, I have a scorpio gf who has been through hell and high water with her fianc?e. He has done wrong several times & she's still right by his side. So idk what that's all about. She's actually very forgiving in all if her relationships once she's done being mad, but when she is mad, she's MEANER than a pit bull!
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pinkrose8
@pinkrose8
11 Years

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Posted by PhoenixRising
Posted by pinkrose8
Posted by PhoenixRising
And to be clear to avoid a debate over whether Scorps lie or not and the hypocrisy of it all, that isn't the point I was trying to make. Are Scorps capable of lying. Yes. Do they? Some do, yes. However, generalizing what Scorps are capable of doing and what some Scorp have done is not relevant to this situation. If you are in a relationship with a Scorp that has NOT lied to you or played games, then it would be more than fair for said Scorp to expect the same from you.



There were times when he said one thing and then another. I understand why he was doing that, I didn't call him out on it and let it go. That's just me.



Okay, so why didn't you? I'm just curious.
click to expand




I figured we are still early, he wants to present himself in a certain way... and it was some minor. I see general goodness in him, so I am not too worry about some minor fraction.
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lisabeth
@lisabethur8
13 Years50,000+ Posts

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Posted by JBG
IMO that lie was not even worth mentioning bc it was so trivial. There's no way he would have ended a relationship he wanted over something so small. I think he's just not feeling a relationship with you for the long haul. Y'all aren't that young, do he doesn't have time to play kid games and lie and sell dreams. He told you exactly what he meant.

Us women are so funny, we want men to be open and honest with is even if it hurts, but when they are, we question and over analyze their honesty. We think he just doesn't want to put it out there bc he doesn't want to be hurt or he's hiding bc he's not sure how we feel. Nope, he was just being plain old honest.

& as for all this scorpio stuff about them letting people go for minor stuff, I have a scorpio gf who has been through hell and high water with her fianc?e. He has done wrong several times & she's still right by his side. So idk what that's all about. She's actually very forgiving in all if her relationships once she's done being mad, but when she is mad, she's MEANER than a pit bull!



+100 spot on.
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JBG
@JBG
12 Years

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Posted by TwirlingStrawberry
Posted by JBG
Posted by TwirlingStrawberry
I'll walk through hell and high water (and I can't even swim) for anyone I care about....but if I find out it's all a lie......

I'll leave you right there.



If he's cheated MULIPLE times & is telling other women y'all are not engaged. It's all a lie. What did you think I meant? He got sick and she stuck around? Umm...NO.



does she know this by fact or just hearsay?
click to expand




She knows for a fact. He's confessed. The fact of the matter is astrology does determine how you think, but it doesn't always determine your actions. I believe people "learn what they live". She grew up in a home where her leo mother always took her cheating scorpio father back, even after he had kids outside of their marriage. Her mom taught her that this behavior is acceptable, whether she meant to or not. Astrology is only half the puzzle, but it ain't the whole pie. People need to remember that.
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JBG
@JBG
12 Years

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Posted by TwirlingStrawberry
Posted by JBG
Posted by TwirlingStrawberry
Posted by JBG
Posted by TwirlingStrawberry
I'll walk through hell and high water (and I can't even swim) for anyone I care about....but if I find out it's all a lie......

I'll leave you right there.



If he's cheated MULIPLE times & is telling other women y'all are not engaged. It's all a lie. What did you think I meant? He got sick and she stuck around? Umm...NO.



does she know this by fact or just hearsay?



She knows for a fact. He's confessed. The fact of the matter is astrology does determine how you think, but it doesn't always determine your actions. I believe people "learn what they live". She grew up in a home where her leo mother always took her cheating scorpio father back, even after he had kids outside of their marriage. Her mom taught her that this behavior is acceptable, whether she meant to or not. Astrology is only half the puzzle, but it ain't the whole pie. People need to remember that.



well, you don't know anything about their relationship, you are just an outsider looking in.

I imagine there are other reasons for her staying.
click to expand




Umm yea she Loves the guy. Honestly the debate isn't about her relationship, I could care less about it, I wish my bf the best. & if she's happy with him I am too. I was just making the point that you all can't say that that small fib she told could potentially be the reason he's no longer interested. "Bc that's just how Scorpios are" if you fool them once they're done. That simply isn't true bc I hve proof that a scorpio will forgive things far past a little lie, like infidelity. He just didn't like her, which he clearly stated.

Like i said your birth chart won't determine all your decisions, it's just an insight to the way the person thinks & how they process emotions, drive and determination, how they like to be loved. Decisions are person specific.
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JBG
@JBG
12 Years

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Posted by TwirlingStrawberry
no, I was saying *I* would have a problem with someone not being authentic....which in the way she wrote her posts....that is what *I* got out of it.

that early in a relationship.....yeah, I'd find my way to the other side of the fence and not waste my time.

petty? maybe
immature? could be
how I'm wired? yes
do I apologise for that? nope

I'm a scorpio.....so I answered honestly the way *I* see it. She can do whatever she wants with that.

That is also why I asked if he had libra placements.

In now way was I quoting the holy grail of scorpio rules.



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