Hello....

New here, first post I have a question: What are the odds of a man, born Nov. 18 1969 who is part Native American w...

This topic was created in the Scorpio forum by MrFirebird on Tuesday, September 20, 2011 and has 73 replies.
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Did I ever feel like committing suicide???? You bet when I was on the road where number of occasions
I felt like I was going to snap and drive that rig straight to hell.

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Posted by westside
i dunno man...this guy doesn't sit right with me


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Posted by beccy
when did you talk to her for the last time? do you still see her?

I believe that you wanted to do everything for your family, I really do.
But there is so much more to this story..... we both know.





She lives 2100 miles away from me.
at the moment it's vey vague internet comms on facebook.
I had co-driver once, a female from El Salvador.
She had 3 kids, she told me how her husband beat her.
We were two lonely hearts and she was offering the
goods. A very, very tempting temptress.
She could dance the salsa off a tortilla.
Two very distinctive opportunities to sample
that mighty tasty morsel.... (sorry but she WAS
HOT)
Make no mistake though, she was a LADY.
She was hurting.
She asked if I thought she should go back
to her husband, I said that I wouldn't
want the love of my life to walk away from me.
That he loved the children and I believe that
in spite of the cowardly abuse, they both
loved each other. That they should seek
counseling etc and try and make it work.
For each other and for the children.
I taught her how to cook potatos on the
truck's exhaust manifold. I even bought
her a broom when she asked and didn't have
the money.
After two trips to the east coast, the second
of which came the advances, she
would tell me that I respected her.
She said "You respect me!" I thought
of course I respect you.
then one night on the second trip back west,
I had finished my shift. She then broke out
in histerics and espanol which I didn't understand
with breaks in english "Your mad at me!"
I said I wasn't mad at her and it escalated
and she got off the truck in a small town in Tennessee.
The same town... my loved one would one day move to..
some 5 years later and where she is now.
think about that odd coincidence.
I survived that test.
I was faithful.

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Posted by beccy
why did you all let this happen??????????
why did you not fight for her? what happened really????
did you just let her marry another guy?

I'll be back later.......


Part 2
As for her marriage...?
I let her do... what SHE wanted to do.
True love SACRIFICES..... self.
Have you ever seen the movie TITANIC???
It hits close to home.
Yes, I am an artist and she IS the most beautiful creature my life had ever known.
And yes you could call me "Jack" and get away with it and she IS my "Wild Irish 'Rose'".
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"I survived that test.
I was faithful."
you must have missed it.
T.R.U.E. LOVE.... does NOT seek revenge.
Where is my Scorpio mind???
Haven't you heard of the PHOENIX?
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Posted by beccy
did you fucking cheat on her or not?

thats one huge problem with you guys.
I can influence you, ok.
but every other bitch can do it too. and thats not so cool.
in fact, I'm always fighting against all those other bitches who are tryin to get into your mind.
you feel sorry for every motherfucker in this world.
thats a huge problem too.
you shouldn't waste your time on those people because you will never get it back the same way.

so.
Does that mean you were in love with this bitch?
just because she let her husband beat her up?
com'on not really!?

and we both also know that you're not always this little cute guy.
we both know you can be the devil.





NO... I did NOT get physically or emotionally or spiritually envolved with this lady.
I did NOT fall in love with her.
I genuinely sympathized with her having been abused.
SHE was/is a HUMAN BEING with REAL feelings. Just like YOU.
I haven't seen nor heard from my female co-driver since that night
she went crazy on me. It was strictly a professional relationship
with the exception of those tempting moments.
This woman was about 8 years older than I as I recall.
We DID have ONE occasion one night when we were "laid over" or (waiting for dispatch)
in Secaucus NJ, to go over to the "Binghampton Ferryboat" and restaraunt on the Hudson
River. New York Harbor and all the lights.... very beautiful. Down river you could see the
Twin Towers, you could see the Empire State Building.... Beautiful and Romantic, indeed.
And we DID dance. BUT AGAIN..... NOTHING HAPPENED.
I was "TEMPTED" and I was "TESTED" but I REALLY WAS A GOOD BOY.
It was the only time in my life I had such an real opportunity and test of my fidelity.
I have only danced with 2 women in my lifetime. The love of my life at her prom,
and this lady on the Binghampton.
The eery irony of this was at my love's prom, the dinner was on a riverboat called the
Reuben E. Lee in San Diego Bay. Dance was at a hotel resort not far from there.
http://sandiego-daily-photo.blogspot.com/2009/05/ruben-e-lee.html




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And it's getting weirder I keep asking myself wtf am I awoke. -nudges girl- Wake up!
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Did you get her back yet?
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Posted by beccy
I genuinely sympathized with her having been abused.
SHE was/is a HUMAN BEING with REAL feelings. Just like YOU
SO FUCKING WHAT?
you dont have to sympathize with every human being out there!!!
who gives a fuck about romantic and beautiful rivers............
at least you both just danced. ok.
so.
did you never, NEVER got revenge on your love?
you just let it happen? no way honey.
don't try to tell me that.
I don't believe this...



It's true, I LET her do what she wanted to do.
She is a Sagittarius.
But it certainly was NOT something that I wanted to do.
It was something that I was forced to do.
I think you asked earlier "why didn't you fight for her?".
First, I tried to reason with her but she was determined.
The only other option left was to literally kill the Leo
and face the obvious consequence of never holding my babies
again or take this BS like a man and protect her and my babies
from that act which I was tempted to do, only to have a solitary
hope that one day things will work out.
Which of two evils shall I choose? The greater or the lessor?

-----------------------------------------------------------------------------------
(Side notes to self)
She is a Saggitarius. (3rd child of 3)
Her Dad is a Scorpio. (1938)
[He served in the Air Force late '50s early '60s.]
Her Mother is a Leo. (1942)[Homemaker and RN]
I am a Scorpio. (only child)
I was raised by my Grandparents (The Greatest Generation)
Grandfather was a Capricorn (1917-1999)
[He served in the US Army in Okinawa during WW2 - His father was born in 1857]
Grandmother was a Saggitarius (1923)
[Homemaker, entrepreneur - her father, (WW1 Vet) born 1898, mother 1903- Great Depression]

Mother (1950) and Father (US Navy/1948) divorced when I was 2.
-----------------------------------------------------------------------------------




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Posted by ArticleL
And it's getting weirder I keep asking myself wtf am I awoke. -nudges girl- Wake up!



???
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Posted by Sagittarius89
Did you get her back yet?




Not yet.
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Bringing this thread back to the top to discuss the signs with whomever is willing.
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Posted by Let*It*Be
Eagles, Hawks and Wolves.
Not sure what that's all about.
^^^^wolves..specifically black wolves who surround me in a dream protecting me when I'm in trouble in the dream.
Interesting. Very Interesting.
Regarding Eagles and the Hawks
Lonnnng story for the moment.

But regarding the Wolves
My first name is an ancient name. It was blessed with these 2 words within the blessing:
Wolf and Prey
My current FB profile photo IS, indeed, a lone..... BLACK.... WOLF.

As for my name..... first, middle, last..., Let's just say that it is of Biblical Proportions.
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Posted by Let*It*Be
Do you share the same philosophy "Everything happens for a reason"?
I do.
Sometimes, the reasons why are very patently clear immediately, yet other times,
they remain a mystery for many years, as if... they are part of a complex puzzle
that is not clearly understood yet is necessary for growth, maturity and procession.
In simple yet no uncertain terms: "If you don't take that first step, you cannot take the second step."
Pardon my now very serious tone....
At this very moment, as I read your comment, and I look at an email that also arrived,
my intuition, if you will, is being stirred in another matter that ironically comes
at this moment in time.
I sense deep pain. No easy answers, yet no clarity as to the cause of the pain. Is it mine?
Someone elses? A step about to be taken? I don't know as yet.
But it is interesting how impeccable the timing is with your question concerning
"Everything happens for a reason".

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Posted by Let*It*Be
"As for my name..... first, middle, last..., Let's just say that it is of Biblical Proportions."

^^^^^^^^^ Confused

ok..you have my attention.

I don't do facebook...but...I am curious to see the picture you have if you don't mind.



Sure thing.
I will upload it here to my profile.
Please stand by.
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Posted by Let*It*Be
The stance and presence of your photo is identical...yet the wolf (wolves) in mine are jet black, silvery/blue eyes. One wolf ALWAYS is about 20 feet away from me..looks directly at me in that stance then his head will turn left and upward and back to me until I look up. It's always at night and it's a house with two lights on. Weird I know...


Yes, it is weird.
A picture of a Jet Black Wolf, at night was extremely difficult for me to find. That was EXACTLY what
I was searching for. But what you see was as close as I could find.
I had found that pic some years ago on the net, then uploaded it from a file I kept on my computer to my
FB account last year along with a photo of an Arctic Wolf. My mother once owned 2 Arctic Wolves.
As far as I know, they were the only two AWs to exist in Hawaii. (Outlaw Mom was baaaad. Winking )
Beautiful animals. On their hind legs they are about 5'7" tall or somewhere thereabouts.
I, myself do NOT have BLUE eyes such as ellesque's eyes are blue, but what I would describe as somewhat Grey/Blue.
I usually sleep during the day, I sleep very few hours. 4-5 hours a day, sometimes less. On a good day, 6 hours.
I take care of my grandmother as best as I can. In our home she is usually in one room and I in my room.
At night, sometimes there are two lights on. Perhaps not exactly what you see in your dream.
I used to drive big rigs for a living. I drove what was called a "Large Car" or a very fast rig.
Sometimes, I would run in a small group of fast trucks that we called "Wolf packs". This is different from
a "Convoy" which, in the strictest sense, would be a group of fleet trucks from the same company, whereas
packs were a ragtag group of drivers for different companies or Owner/Operators that were, shall we say, "flyin'"
down the highway all night and day long. Sometimes, I'd be "Lone Wolf" going down the road.
I've been all over the US.
Trucks and all of that stuff is behind me, now.


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Posted by Let*It*Be
Yet...at the same time, I know they are there to protect me. I'm not afraid, in fact I'm in awe. I actually got to pet them in some of the dreams...I didn't want to wake up.
Anyway..cool thought provoking stuff here..I need to tend to my real world stuff now. Sad



That's pretty neat about getting to pet the wolves. Sounds like the dreams are quite lucid.
I am fascinated by dreams too.
Ellesque told me because of my Moon in Pisces, I'm supposed to see dead people. It's strange
but I DID have a couple of dreams early this year where there were zombies in the park.
The first time they completely ignored me, then the second dream they were, pardon the
expression, trying to pet me! I acted like they weren't there. If you think that was pretty rude
I agree, it was, but that's how my dream went.
Maybe next time I dream of zombies, they'll let me pet them to make up for my rudeness.
Winking
But the MOST fascinating dream I had has to do with Hawk Medicine. VERY, VERY Fascinating.
Well,
I enjoyed our conversation thus far and certainly hope to hear more from you and take our discussion
further. smile
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Posted by Let*It*Be
"Pardon my now very serious tone....
At this very moment, as I read your comment, and I look at an email that also arrived,
my intuition, if you will, is being stirred in another matter that ironically comes
at this moment in time.
I sense deep pain. No easy answers, yet no clarity as to the cause of the pain. Is it mine?
Someone elses? A step about to be taken? I don't know as yet.
But it is interesting how impeccable the timing is with your question concerning
"Everything happens for a reason"."

So...someone sent you an e-mail that is apparently of significance..and you sense deep pain? Interesting, yet at the same time hope its not pain you are sensing, but instead a piece of the puzzle to identify the reason...





... so I can let it go and let it be.
There WILL be an answer, Let*It*Be.
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Posted by Let*It*Be
"there will be a chance that they will see..."



"....There WILL be an answer, Let*It*Be."
Winking
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Just wanted to say.... I enjoyed singing along with you, Let*It*Be.
Let*It*Be? Let*It*Be? Are you there? Let*It*Be? Let*It*Be? Let*It*Be? Let*It*Be?
Seriously, I really dig the Beatles and this song.
There'll never be another Fab Four, again.
Waxin' nostalgic.
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Posted by Let*It*Be
The Beatles are classic. I picked this screen name for personal reasons and is fitting. I got my answer...and that was..not in this lifetime. Sad


Awe.
Sad
But do you still believe that everything happens for a reason?
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Posted by ellessque
my birthday is november 18. *waves at the OP*


Oh geeeeeze........ I forgot to wave back at Ellesque.
No wonder she thought I saw dead people.
Sorry Ellesque.
Waving back! smile
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