Internal change but not external?

This topic was created in the Scorpio forum by lotus on Wednesday, October 17, 2007 and has 28 replies.
A particular Scorpio, much older than me and male, told me that he changes internaly but not externaly. After seeing how sad he was and avoiding contact with my eyes (he would keep his eyes up and either to the right side or the left)I asked his what was bothering him. His response was that no one understands him, not even me; like Dorian Gray, he said, he changes internaly but not externaly.
I was shocked by this statement. This man was hot and heavy for me the last time I saw him (many months before I saw him again - we live in different countries), even declaring that he couldn't sleep, and out of nowhere, he who used to stare at me now can't even behold my eyes. It is the weirdest circumstance I tell you.
Imagine someone talking to you and keeping his eyes up and to the left or the right all the time.
OK, Scorpios, time for you to get your magical minds to work. What's up with this person really? Is he afraid of the age difference and that is what troubles him? Or has he just lost interest and doesn't want to tell me?
I think if he lost interest he would tell you. Somethig is bothering him and scorps don't express their true feelings easily especially male scorps.
Why are you trying to think outside the box when it is not needed? I can relate to this man. He is telling you what is really going on. He isn't making up a story to hide what is really happening. We aren't that good at lying.
I should add that this man is over 20 years older than me, so it might have something to do with this or with the fact that we're away from each other most of the time (we live in different countries).
I've never actually seen anyone talking to me and keeping his eyes up and to the left or right all the time. He wasn't looking down. He was always looking up as if he was calling God and crying on the inside. Very strange, and very sad, considering he knows I love him (I've told him so!)
For the record, I am 25 years old.
irishlibra_, yes it is true about looking at you directly or indirectly. He has done that before and lots. He also gets very jealous when I talk to other guys or they show interest in me.
However, that whole keeping your eyes up and to one side thing was really weird. Would you keep your eyes up and to the left throughout the conversation with someone? It's as if you really can't stand the person......at least to me it would be that.
He's not up to anything and anyone with half a brain knows it.
What do you mean Scorpius? "He's not up to anything". You think it's normal behavior?
Exactly, Roxi. If I'm not up to anything, I have no problem looking at someone.
What's up with this whole internal change but not external though? Does that mean that he get depressed on the inside but does not show it on the outside?
TaurusBabe, he did not tell me how he felt.......I was the one who told him how *I* felt.
He just made abstract comments about why everyone is asking him why he hasn't married and all.
I don't think Scorpios are too keen to tell anyone how they feel.
Sorry, not enough info. It could mean a lot of things.
We go through changes. That's for sure.
He did imply that he couldn't sleep because of me and he had trouble eating and sitting next to me as well. He would get aroused and had to go to the bathroom to do *something* to himself. I felt really uncomfortable sitting next to him 'cause he would get so aroused. This was last year. This year, he just couldn't look at me in the eye. Apparently, he thinks I don't love him because i wasn't very demonstrative toward him.
Does he sound......um....perverted? Maybe a bit, although he was quite classy about it. What was interesting is that his whole body would shake when he saw me. Tis year, though, he said he'd rather not have me see him at all. I went anyway, and the thing with the eyes happened, although he was still hot for me and jealous when other guys would look at me.
Maybe he's just a wierdo, and it has only an incidental connection to being a Scorpio.
"Maybe he's just a wierdo, and it has only an incidental connection to being a Scorpio."
Stranger than fiction, indeed.
I forgot to mention that I am a Libra on the Scorpio cusp and I am often told I am that I am very beautiful (often likened to Nicole Kidman).
"I forgot to mention that I am a Libra on the Scorpio cusp and I am often told I am that I am very beautiful (often likened to Nicole Kidman)."
Maybe it has nothing to do with Scorpio. Maybe he's a middle-aged guy who realizes you're out of his league - too young, too hot. And he's dealing with the rejection.
That sounds sign-independent to me.
TaurusBabe, you're in the UK? So am I, in the city of scholars......./smilesmile
Seriously though, this guy knows how much I fancy him. I haven't slept with him, but we have fooled around a bit. He's quite a gentleman really. It's not his fault his body does what it does when he's around me.
Do you think the eye thing happens because he thinks I have rejected him? You know Libras are more verbal than Scorpios and we *tell* people how we feel rather than only showing them.
is that the art-history prof.?
Great memory, Yum. Yeah, it is him! Here I am a year later still trying to figure this guy out.
He might be middle aged but he is very successful and handsome though. We also seem to be having a great time with each other most of the time we are together. Apart from all this sexual stuff, we understand each other very well in other things. And he has hinted that he wants to get married, so he is not really a player because I've been told by people who know him that he hasn't been with anyone for many years.
Roxi, I want to ask, but you know how good Scorpios are with evading questions and all.
I've always assumed that it would be harder for 50ish guys to get aroused, but this one was full force all the way. I mean, I haven't seen panting and heavy breathing, and so many erections in 18 year olds! Sheesh! Maybe he is a special case since he hasn't had much action in a while. Either that, or my pheromones drive him crazy (as his drive ME crazy!)
Of course, we are always talking about a Scorpio here, and Scorps are known to get horny even in their 80s and 90s. Look at Pablo Picasso; he fathered a child in his late 70s.

I think older successful scorp men tend to fall Deep only very rarely --and when this happens with someone decades younger and that too at a too far away place say another state, country, continent etc. it becomes all the more difficult for them.
BUT this happens coz they are too choosy and not every female can meet their expectations of internal red hot passion + extreme sexiness (animal like) + depth of character + internal purity and beauty. Externally she has to be good - But I think it is these characters that matter more and finding such a combination to the extreme craved for by scorp men (older) is all the more harder.
When this happens and he finds that it is something very difficult to culminate, then he starts feeling depressed. But his PRIDE---stands in the way to true happiness. especial;ly with intelluctuals like professors smile
And Lotus, your scorp cusp might have done the trick of capturing him Winking
Don't settle for that sign, sagigoat!! If you think a sign or some fate is going to force you to let go then you are wrong! You want him back, don't you? then don't listen to these women. You need to make it happen and you need to get on it fast. I see the Capricorn in you and it's telling me you are a go-getter. So go and get him back! Are you really going to let something intangible like fate force you to give up?
Well then... I supposed it's up to you, sag, to figure what's right. You have to pick either, risking humiliation to potentially win back your man, or sulk here and inside for the next few months. It's pretty straight forward but only one gives you a chance.
I don't really need closure and I have nothing in virgo except for the 9nth house.
Not saying that he's like me either, mind, different people just tend to be different. We don't call them different for naught, though admittedly their differences may not be great, but that would depend on the specific people, as every case is different.
Also, it may have something to do with the 7th house more than the ascension. Mine is in Aries, so I can get forget about people pretty quickly. The venus sign is also worth looking into.
"his venus is libra and 7th house (and juno) in pisces... what does 7th house do?"
My venus is in Libra as well. I think it makes me a bit more detached and amiable when it comes to relationships than the common Scorp.
The 7th house is the house of relationships, and having his in Pisces I think makes him a bit less likely to seek closure, and a bit more likely to act like the protagonist of some greek tragedy, wallowing in his noble melancholy and sacrifice.Tongue
Scorpio is deep and sensitive. He doesn't want to make himself vulnerable and run the risk of being hurt - sounds like he already feels vulnerable. It also seems he cares otherwise he would not have a problem which he obviously does. Perhaps you need to make yourself more vulnerable and reassure him that you care and can commit to him if that is the case. Scorpio avoiding eye contact means SOMETHING but not disinterest - he would be straight with you about disinterest.

Leave Your Feedback

We'd love to hear your thoughts! If you're not logged in, you can still share your feedback below. Your input helps us improve the experience for everyone. To post your own content or join the conversation, please log in or create an account.