Is gradual attraction better than.......

This topic was created in the Scorpio forum by Scorpiosity on Thursday, February 12, 2009 and has 15 replies.
Head over heels attraction? Are you willing to settle for less than butterflies?
"Head over heels attraction? Are you willing to settle for less than butterflies?"
Hell No!! I want the butterflies, the tingly feeling.
I can be attracted to you but can you keep me interested?
Sometimes the butterflies dont appear til after you get to know the person a little. Generally in the first few dates unless they are the Epitome of your dreams!
"Head over heels attraction? Are you willing to settle for less than butterflies?"
Funny enough I was just asking myself the exact same question. I had to face that situation just recently. I have to say that I can't do without the intense connection/chemistry. I tried and I think it's just not of my nature to do without it. I don't consider myself superficial or anything but a woman has to turn on my ignition to even be considered and keep me going, being a nice person only, is not good enough.
sometimes the butterflies can take a while to take flight and attraction may not be instant but the second you realise your feelings for the other person, it can result in just as intense chemistry.
you won't fall in love with someone just cos they're a nice person. you won't fall in love with anyone without that butterflies sensation at some point - not true love anyway.
udgscorp
"I think what I'm tryna say is that I dont believe the butterflies last forever - but it would be nice! and I hope I can find one."
Well I have been with my Gem for over a year know and he still makes me tingle and I still get butterflies when I know I am going to see him, when calls me and I hear that specific ringtone I have for his calls, it all still gets me excited.
I attribute that to being in love and the fact that, I don't see him everyday nor do I talk to him every day because of our busy schedules,and for me I believe that a Gemini Man can continue to supply that desire for me to be excited and keep the butterflies flowing in me, which in turn will keep me interested. And I like that smile
As a matter of fact I told him the other day, which I do periodically, I tell him that he still excites me, and he said "I am supposed to"
I think you can loose the chemistry and the attraction if you see a person all the time. I personally don't want that. I want to miss my man, and always be excited when we are going to get together.
Head over heels attraction? Are you willing to settle for less than butterflies?
Hmm, I prefer either one, depending on the situation. I think its better if both people from the same if its a 'head over heels' situation, if not, it can get very weird really quick.
I mean initial strongly felt physical attraction. You may also like what you see as far as their personality. This person gives you butterflies.
On the other side, there's this person you may be mildly attracted to (their not unattractive tho), at most, and over time, develop a fondness for.
I believe this thread is asking about potential mates, not platonic acquaintances or friends. So since I'm a physical person, physical attraction is "numero uno" for me. I've got to be able to imagine myself making love to the man. After all, if he doesn't appeal to me physically first, I wouldn't take him seriously as a potential boyfriend/mate.
I'm sure it was physical attraction initially for me and my scorpio. But even though we were both "controlled" initially when we met, we both admitted later that we were lusting for each other, and even more when we realized how much our personalities matched as well!
I don't know about all scorpio men, but I'm glad my scorpio hunk-of-burning-love wanted to see me everyday -- even when we were dating -- and as a result, the intensity of our love, intimacy and excitement of life together continues as we go along. No, not everyday is a bucket of dynamite, but there's something to knowing that that person is not bored with you or wants to get away from you on the "quiet" days. You both can just "be". Whether I'm playing piano or writing a letter and he's watching sports, or washing the car, etc. We are "together" but not joined at the hip.
My scorpio and I do "regular" things together (like chores, cooking, shopping, etc.) and we make that fun and romantic/intimate because we enjoy each other's company -- it's really what you make of the time you spend together. For me, seeing the man I love everyday does not decrease the degree of chemistry or attraction -- it helps me to appreciate and understand how meaningful it is to have someone to share the rest of my life with...
and that is a BIG "Turn On" for me.
"I mean initial strongly felt physical attraction"
Okay ... In my case I wasn't referring to physical only. I simply have to be attracted one way or another, it really doesn't matter how, a woman has to move me to be considered. I can't do without it. Different sign attracts me in different ways. Leos can be challenging to deal with and that alone can activate my senses and get me going, while Scorpios aura and presence can be quite attractive. Pisces seem to make it inside of me with very little effort, they're naturally sweet even when they try not to. I couldn't deeply hate a Pisces if my life depended on it. Capricorns mind really gets me in a special way, the most simplest being I've been attracted to, an attraction far from obvious to a man's eye but sit down with her for a drink or something and watch the attraction unfold. It's really the only sign who gets me that way but ... at the end, I have to be moved inside. Whatever gets you inside it's all good but I need to be moved.
My dear sweet babies, the butterflies you describe are also known as infatuation. Indeed, it is a wonderful feeling, but feelings are fickle. When the butterflies fade (and rest assured, they will), what will you be left with? Hopefully, honesty, compromise, and security.
That is the solidity I look forward to maintaining.
smile
Slow burning smouldering sexuality...he could ooze it in some way or other..you just have to be smart enough to spot it..
I used to believe in initial explosive starts..they don't work...short lived..get to know someone and if there is attraction in some form..it's so beautiful
SS: you look like you're snorting cocaine woman!
There has to be chemistry... but you have to recognise that lust needs to be underpinned by compatibility and a liking for each other.
My experience of Internet dating has led me to think I'm very picky. But the truth is, I do know whether or not there's a 'spark' when I meet someone. It's an artificial situation I know - and I'm also aware that 'not fancying someone' can be a self-protection device.
Twice I have gone against my instincts to see whether anything would develop. I had a few dates with both guys. I never felt anything more than I had on the initial meeting.
This is why I'd prefer to meet someone in real life. When I first met the Scorpio I dated last year, there was a tiny spark which over a few months grew into the most amazing chemistry I've ever felt - and he wasn't someone I'd have picked out as 'my type' at all.
The only problem with this is that now we're not together any more we both still seem to have the chemistry... And that's really difficult cos we're good friends.
Still, some nice memories!
And it's left me determined not to 'settle'. But damn, he's going to be a hard act to follow!