RE: Rant (sex and the city)

http://warner.blogs.nytimes.com/2008/06/05/woman-in-charge-women-who-charge/?em&ex=1212897600&en=3149a226e69054e9&ei=5087% 0A

This article discusses how far we still have to go to include women, as first class citizens. I notice sexism still in the workplace, its playful, but I don't think most men or " women who have made it" believes that it still exists..because it doesn't affect them.

You and Joan Walsh of Salon are the only two voices I have found on this subject that reflect my own views. Thank you for this article.
Now, what can we DO about it?
I have been so shocked at Hillary's treatment and the ?zeitgeist? I see on TV and the net.
I'm especially saddened by the anti-woman anti-Hillary commentary of many of the women on TV!
From the silence following the ?Iron My Shirt? and ?Marry Me? outbursts in NH to yesterday when Andrea Mitchell worried aloud that Barack may look ?henpecked? by Hillary and her followers, I have been wondering - Who are these people and where do these attitudes come from? Women like Andrea, Dowd, Borger, Ifill, and others disappoint me?and I wonder?do they live in the real world?
At an Obama event in LA, Oprah asserted - with Michelle Obama, Caroline Kennedy and Maria Shriver onstage - that we are post-feminist now, and to prove it - Oprah told the crowd - we didn't have to vote for Hillary, because we had succeeded - we were liberated and to prove it we could move past the women's movement?we could be done with all that sisterhood stuff and be guilt-free to vote for Obama instead of Hillary! Now, I never thought all women should or would vote for Hillary, but Oprah's post-feminist ?logic? showed that she is out of touch! Oprah and other elites may not experience the real harm that sexist dsicrimination imposes on millions of women in their everyday lives, but I can tell you that I witness sexism in my business EVERY day and there is ample evidence that women are STILL the ?niggers of the world?, as Yoko Ono and John Lenno wrote 36 years ago! We are certainly not beyond the need for all that sisterhood stuff yet.

But, even though I am very familiar with sexism in the workplace and society, I have been stunned by its pervasiveness in the public square during this campaign?the loudness of it, the crudeness of it, the hatefulness?and the lack of righteous indignation and vocal resistance to it.
Where are the women who will speak up in public and not feel the need to apologize for defending, protecting and advocating for respect for other women? Where are the men who respect women— Why don't they speak out?
I yell at the TV, and I want to write letters to every editor and politician?but it would be a full-time job (I avoid even going to the blogs anymore because they are so-o-o-o hate-filled)!
I don't understand how we got to this place in our public discourse, nor do I understand the underlying attitudes, but I'll wait for someone else to try to explain the root causes. Meanwhile, I'll take the behaviorist's approach. I DON'T want to hear it, so I will speak out whenever I can!
What I really want to know is this - - what are we ALL going to DO about it together?
For our mothers, for our daughters, for ourselves and the betterment of society, we must DO something!
Obama's acceptance speech is scheduled for the anniversary of a great civil rights event years ago. And, many have remarked on the serendipity.
Is it too audacious to hope that this political year can also end with some grand act of grace that signals the end of tolerance of sexism toward women?

A response from a very intelligent woman!

Women are always sexualized and not promoted for jobs they are more than qualified for. An unkempt buddy of mine at work was chosen over a very smart and beautiful woman.

I couldn't believe they didn't promote her!!! She has been there longer than he has!!!

I guess the sex jokes with her will continue.

Sorry it just really pisses me off. I'm mad!!!!!
I just heard she was thinking of quitting.

caper: I was told very early in my career that my biggest handicap would be being attractive AND skilled. Men feel threatened by this combination and other women are resentful. It can sometimes be considered too contentious to give a promotion to someone who superficially 'has it all' which is bullshit of course.

Your colleague should appeal against this decision if she feels it was unfair. I certainly would. I am sure that many would prefer women such as her to shrink into the background and get on with filing paperclips but she has to fight the urge to do so just to keep the peace.

For some reason, there is a widespread belief that it is not possible for a woman to have looks and brains - or in someway it is distasteful and goes against the norm. People will always be obstructive to women like this because they acknowledge her potential power and try to stamp it down because they are intimidated by it.

And that is also why, when women do finally reach the top of their profession, they will get lambasted for behaving like a man. You can't win I'm afraid. You just have to know your own abilities and believe in yourself because successful, attractive people evoke much negativity in others and you can't let it penetrate into your self-confidence or else they will have won a victory over you.

I'm afraid she isn't going to appeal the decision, but will quit. I actually work in one of the most male dominated workplaces. Is so unbalanced which is why I think most of the people who work there are unhappy...but no one recognizes that it my be because women there are treated like second class citizens.

"attractive people evoke much negativity in others"

Really? I didn't even know that this happens! Is that why there are many magazines devoted to trashing celebrities?