Really?!

This topic was created in the Scorpio forum by happykitsune on Friday, January 27, 2012 and has 19 replies.
This is more of a vent, but people can chime in if they've had similar experiences and how they dealt with it.
So I quit talking to the scorpio a few days ago. Told him we couldn't be friends cus I still had feelings for him, and that was that.
I look over at my cap friends phone today and see his name on her screen. I've been fasting so I'm a bit irritated and I probably sounded like I was gna kill her when I asked if she was texting him cus she seemed a bit standoffish afterwards. Turns out shes not and it was just a comment from him on one of her statuses on fb.
My taur sister seems to think he's using her to try to get to me by commenting on her stuff.
I am so pissed. The one time I actually do something right..the one time I try to move on and respect myself and he has to go and target my friend. I feel so helpless. I just want him out of my life at this point Sad
I'm prob gna apologize to her for sounding like I was gna kill her. But if something else fishy happens I am going to have a talk with her about all this.
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Awm sweetie...he is doing it because he is tryng to get to YOU, not her. Means he still likes you...means he is a twit because if he doesnt want you for gf, then he should respect you and leave you alone. It means a lot of different things...but bottom line, he still digs ya, and I hope tht brings you some solace.
now go eat a hamburger and milkshake...feel better!!
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Sadly I'm still on my fast Sad
But good news is I talked to my cap friend. I apologized for the way I reacted to seeing his comment and she understood where I was coming from. I also discussed to her what I was trying to do and she told me that she had no intention of going after him and that he hadn't tried to flirt with her at all. It was a really good talk and I'm glad I got that out of the way.
So I get back from dinner and I look at my phone. Scorpio texted me saying he knew we weren't "friends" but that he had to tell me something funny that happened at his work.
I'm chuckling to myself because you're right BGP. He does still like me. And it's pretty flattering that he still makes the effort even though I ended it.
I'm debating when and if I should text him back. Just a simple "Hahaha tht's funny" would be all I'd say
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You know what MY answer is, don't you?
PUT DOWN THAT PHONE!Winking
YOU don't have time to reply because you are out living your great life.
YOU have moved on and are now focusing on people who value you.
YOU have set a personal boundary that you cannot engage in a friendship for self care (which means texting)
Remember...people believe what we DO, not what we say.
Ok...Im gonna come over there and remove that phone from your hand and replace it with a double cheeseburger from 5 guys.
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Alright so here's what I did. I contacted my dad. After talking to him about it, and him telling me to keep it at him chasing me (duh, it's what we've been discussing for weeks) he finally told me that I can send him a "haha" after several hrs.
I think it's a good middle ground
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Ok, ok...Father knows best.
BUT...if he replies to the "ha ha", you'll have yet ANOTHER decision to make. This could go on and on and on...
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Posted by BigGirlPanties
Ok, ok...Father knows best.
BUT...if he replies to the "ha ha", you'll have yet ANOTHER decision to make. This could go on and on and on...


True.. my thing at this point now tho is to seem disinterested. Whether that means keeping it short or not responding at all.
He told me that the scorpio would see it as a game at first, but if I kept playing it that I would beat him out. I've been in it for the long haul for 4 yrs before going back and forth. I'm pretty sure I can handle this. Just got to remember not to fall into the same trap as last time
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Oh and one more thing. My dad commented on the fact that I shouldn't have told scorpio I couldn't be friends cus I still feel stuff for him.
Gah, did I do a no-no here? Gna need to bring myself up from this one :/
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I think your dad was saying you shouldnt appear vulnerable with him. Im on the fence about that as you did need to give him some reason for not being in his life in an active way as a friend. I prefer honesty myself. So I think you did the right thing.
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Posted by BigGirlPanties
I think your dad was saying you shouldnt appear vulnerable with him. Im on the fence about that as you did need to give him some reason for not being in his life in an active way as a friend. I prefer honesty myself. So I think you did the right thing.


Thanks. I agree. I guess as long as I keep to the plan from here on out I will convey the right message. So it's back on. Maybe..
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Aaaand now she messaged him on the status asking to borrow the eukaleli (sp?)
Gah I can't take this. People need to just be straight up with me. I'm gna go bury my head in the sand now. Srsly!
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Aren't they just friends? Do you not trust her? Or is jealously a big problem for you?
Whichever it is, maybe it's time to remove him from your friends list? Why torture yourself? Detaching is a gift you give yourself.
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Posted by BigGirlPanties
Aren't they just friends? Do you not trust her? Or is jealously a big problem for you?
Whichever it is, maybe it's time to remove him from your friends list? Why torture yourself? Detaching is a gift you give yourself.


All in stages my friend. I'm still watching her. She was upfront about the eukaleili. I didn't even have to ask her, she just made sure it was ok tht she borrowed if from him. As long as she's keeping it honest I can trust her. But to fill you in I just made this friend this semester so I haven't known her long. I've also always been weary of cap girls...I've rarely met one that isn't off in some way.
I prayed about it last night, and while I'm still not at peace about the whole thing I've at least come to realize that if the situation does get worse I will have no problem cutting both off and I will just take it as it just wasn't meant to be. I'm alrdy in the moving on stage so they wouldn't just move it along faster I guess. I'd just rather it not happen that way. I think I'll be fine, but I had to vent.
Whew I feel better.
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Posted by iwin32
I've always believed that once you break up with someone, it is better to stop any kind of communication! Period.
Ignore him if he calls, texts, or talks to you. I know it hurts because you still like him, but it's better to do that than getting attached even more than what you already are.
I've done it many times. I've stopped talking my exes because of that and once I'm over them, I go back and we'll start talking like if nothing happened, but knowing that the 'awkwardness' is no longer there.




Yeah I hear ya on that. I'm slowly making my way through the stage where I try not to be hopeful and realize the right guy who will love me right is out there. I just have to be patient and continue to love without hindrance.
I think once all is over I'll be able to talk to him again. I've done most of my grieving so it's good to know I'm in the final stages and well on my way to being healed smile
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I'm sorry kits! My ex scorp has been saying all kinds of shit to me too. It sucks. I think some scorpios like to drag things out forever because they like feeling that pain. My current scorp said that is what my ex is doing I think he's right. I hope it goes better and you feel better honey
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Posted by Sag89
I'm sorry kits! My ex scorp has been saying all kinds of shit to me too. It sucks. I think some scorpios like to drag things out forever because they like feeling that pain. My current scorp said that is what my ex is doing I think he's right. I hope it goes better and you feel better honey
Thank you. They are such weird creatures
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Posted by DazedScorp
Posted by happykitsune

Thank you. They are such misunderstood creatures


*fixed
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+1
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Posted by DazedScorp
Posted by happykitsune

Thank you. They are such misunderstood creatures


*fixed
click to expand


Weird too. I mean that in the best possible sense tho. I like a guy who can keep it interesting
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Posted by iwin32
Posted by happykitsune
Posted by iwin32
I've always believed that once you break up with someone, it is better to stop any kind of communication! Period.
Ignore him if he calls, texts, or talks to you. I know it hurts because you still like him, but it's better to do that than getting attached even more than what you already are.
I've done it many times. I've stopped talking my exes because of that and once I'm over them, I go back and we'll start talking like if nothing happened, but knowing that the 'awkwardness' is no longer there.




Yeah I hear ya on that. I'm slowly making my way through the stage where I try not to be hopeful and realize the right guy who will love me right is out there. I just have to be patient and continue to love without hindrance.
I think once all is over I'll be able to talk to him again. I've done most of my grieving so it's good to know I'm in the final stages and well on my way to being healed smile


I'm glad you are in the final stages. I've been there and I know how it feels, so good luck to you!
smile
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Thanks!
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