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Feb 04, 2013Comments: 1 · Posts: 9186 · Topics: 179
FixedWater, I don't know if you have any knowledge of the meaning of child abuse. I've read many of your posts here, and although you come across as attention seeking in those, you did share your own past and it's clear you do have some knowledge of it first hand. The things you say you are trying to change about yourself and why is a no brainer. Are you ready for a man in your life? No way..but that's something you'll figure out sooner or later. You can take the following for what it's worth but if you can drop the ego bullshit and put yourself in your daughters's shoes, maybe you'll grasp.
When you started that thread, I had ^^^that in the back of my mind, but still gave you the benefit of the doubt through many pages. Now I don't know if you were drinking and drunk by the end of it, but it's pretty obvious your shitty attitude came about. I was STILL giving you the benefit of the doubt. However and again this is not about you, nor what came out. This is about an innocent child who I'm sure loves her mother very much. All kids do at that young age.
Your initial post came across as odd. However..from the second I read
" She obviously fears her dad will die. you went from that to knocking your ex down pretty much throughout after that, which distracted away from your daughter. The tarot reading solution I admit did seem out there yet as well. To the point...When I thought it was just you over reacting, and at the same time seeing nothing but resentment toward your ex I shared my opinion on that. Then you got real pissy with Pangel..you let out some more information that you failed to share from the beginning that IS relevant to your daughter and the original concern. Irresistible spitefully stepped in as back up for you because she's a brainless idiot too. I don't want to waste time on the back and forth..I'm going to provide facts:
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Feb 04, 2013Comments: 1 · Posts: 9186 · Topics: 179
Child Abuse is considered:
Emotional abuse
Sexual abuse
Physical abuse
Neglect
Neglect:
Any recent act or failure to act on the part of a parent or caretaker,, which results in death, serious physical or emotional harm, sexual abuse, or exploitation, or an act or failure to act which presents an imminent risk of serious harm
The persistent failure to meet a child's basic physical and/or psychological needs, likely to result in the serious impairment of the child's health or development.
Signs of child abuse are (and in your daughters case relevant)
Signs of abuse in the child
Arrives to school early, stays late after school - basically, does not seem keen on going back home
The child appears to be in a permanent state of fearful alert, as if expecting some impending unpleasant event to occur
The child appears to be withdrawn, passive, and overly compliant
The child does not appear to have adult supervision
The child has problems focusing (learning), which do not seem to be due to any specific psychological or physical causes
The child's overall behavior changes
The child's physical or medical problems that were brought to the parents' attention were not addressed
The child's school performance changes
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Feb 04, 2013Comments: 1 · Posts: 9186 · Topics: 179
Whether you want to believe it or not...YOU are a big part of this abuse. Neglect IS abuse. You allowed this to happen and whether it happened yesterday, or two weeks ago...IT DOES NOT MATTER. You did not report him, you did not go to family services...YOU SIMPLY DID NOTHING. Well..you called a tarot reader and you lit candles. STILL...you allow your ex unsupervised visitation. As a sole custodial parent you HAVE rights. Well, your daughter does, you choose not to worry about that.
Here are the laws of child abuse:
Before I get into that...Irrisistible obviously is clueless. She immediately assumed the child would be taken away from you HAD YOU DONE THE RIGHT THING. Wrong! If you are not in control of what took place you are NOT responsible, and NO..your daughter would not have been taken away AT ALL from you or her home. That is a FACT. HOWEVER, that changes should your daughter feel safer talking to someone else and something like the above comes out and your daughter tells whoever it is SHE TOLD YOU. (as you state so clearly) The fact that you KNOW/KNEW he was leaving your 10 year old daughter with strange men, IS NEGLECT on your part. 9 times out of 10, your daughter would be removed temporarily until you complete a parenting course, and some counseling and did everything in your power to make things right with the court. It's no different than a mother sitting in a living room turning the other cheek while a child is being sexually abused in another room. She wasn't in the room so it didn't happen. Classic.
From Child Family Services: (this is GENERAL FOR ALL AREAS)
What does ???in need of protection?? mean?
The CFSA describes when a child is in need of protection. This includes if he or she:
is left alone, is uncared for or is neglected;
has been abused or is likely to be abused;
sees abuse between adults in the home.
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Feb 04, 2013Comments: 1 · Posts: 9186 · Topics: 179
Abuse includes physical, sexual and emotional abuse.
The law says you must protect your children. Under the CFSA, it does not matter which parent or caregiver is abusing the child. A caregiver includes any adult who is responsible for caring for a child. Even if you are not abusing your child, the CAS can investigate if you knew about the abuse, or should have known about it, and did not try to stop it.
THE LAW:
Section 72 (1) of the Child and Family Services Act
Despite the provisions of any other Act, if a person, including a person who performs professional or official duties with respect to children, has reasonable grounds to suspect one of the following, the person shall forthwith report the suspicion and the information on which it is based to a society:
The child has suffered physical harm, inflicted by the person having charge of the child or caused by or resulting from that person's,
i. failure to adequately care for, provide for, supervise or protect the child, or
ii. pattern of neglect in caring for, providing for, supervising or protecting the child.
There is a risk that the child is likely to suffer physical harm inflicted by the person having charge of the child or caused by or resulting from that person's,
i. failure to adequately care for, provide for, supervise or protect the child, or
ii. pattern of neglect in caring for, providing for, supervising or protecting the child.
The child has been sexually molested or sexually exploited, by the person having charge of the child or by another person where the person having charge of the child knows or should know of the possibility of sexual molestation or sexual exploitation and fails to protect the child.
There is a risk that the child is likely to be sexually molested or sexually exploited as described in paragraph 3.
The child requires medical treatment to cure, prevent or alleviate physical harm or suffering and the child's parent or the person having charge of the child does not provide, or refuses or is unavailable or unable to consent to, the treatment.
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Feb 04, 2013Comments: 1 · Posts: 9186 · Topics: 179
The last post in your thread from Wynter was a classic example of ignorance and why so many children are screwed up in this world.
That's why April is Child Abuse Awareness Month, and it's a month to recognize what you or ANYONE can do to help or save a child from abuse.
The bottom line...you do nothing=YOU ARE A CHILD ABUSER. Maybe you didn't the help you needed when you were younger (including half the members in dxp). That's what I meant by BREAKING THE CHAIN. The fact that she spends a lot of time STILL with her father, who you claim is drinker and gambler speaks volumes of your concern. You state you HAVE sole custody. Do some research and LEARN what that means. You'd be surprised.
I expect the sockpuppets to arrive to derail this thread. I could care less. If I did anything here to open up your eyes to help that little girl, that's good enough for me.
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Feb 04, 2013Comments: 1 · Posts: 9186 · Topics: 179
Will you report your daughters recent behavior and the potential reason behind it and have her professionally counseled to get to the bottom of it? (FREE OF CHARGE) Or will you continue to have tarot readings done? (AND PAY FOR THAT?)
Will you ask the court as A SOLE CUSTODIAL parent to order supervised visitation? (FREE OF CHARGE)
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Apr 13, 2005Comments: 0 · Posts: 44084 · Topics: 685
Funnily enough, if someone stands up for the child, which would mean they would have to go against the parent, then you have people like Impulsv, for example, who cannot handle the negativity going toward the parent.
Yet, it's the parent who is the abuser.
It's bizarre how people cannot stand the truth, and will do everything in their power to ignore it.
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Feb 04, 2013Comments: 1 · Posts: 9186 · Topics: 179
Like the other threads that people purposely derail...unfortunately for those people, I will not entertain. This needed to be said...and I will continue on the subject of child abuse next month.
Exits...
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Apr 13, 2005Comments: 0 · Posts: 44084 · Topics: 685
Whether she has had personal experience or not is irrelevant.
Her experience is as relevant as yours.
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Apr 13, 2005Comments: 0 · Posts: 44084 · Topics: 685
The more you talk, the more you sound like Elle .... just exactly as LIB has been saying all along
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Apr 13, 2005Comments: 0 · Posts: 44084 · Topics: 685
Fixedwater is abusing her child by means of neglect .... and whether another person has experience with this or not, has no bearing on it.
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Jan 30, 2014Comments: 3 · Posts: 1399 · Topics: 28
Another sign is if a child never wants to go home.
When I was 7, I became good friends with a younger kid in the same apartment building. She always wanted to play in my unit, which is fine, but the trouble was, she NEVER wanted to go back home. When my parents told her that it was time for her to go home, she would cry hysterically and beg us to let her stay.
Even at 7, I thought that was odd.
One day, I walked her home, as we approached her front, this biker looking neo-Nazi type dude is also walking up to the door. He sees her, grabs her by her hair, and basically kicks her roughly into their apartment. He did that right in front of me. I'm in the doorway just staring in shock. He sees me, snaps his fingers in my face and tells me to "get on home, geisha doll". Then he shuts the door in my face.
I told my parents about all of this later that night. My mother panicked when I described him, and insisted that I never tell anyone or he might kill us.
I remember daydreaming in class about ways for me and my parents to "adopt her", and came up with my 7-year-old mind's schemes.
Unfortunately, they moved shortly after. I hope she's alright. I wish I remembered her last name, because I'd like to connect with her again. Arianna something.
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Mar 09, 2014Comments: 20 · Posts: 1771 · Topics: 32
I can speak on this. Lots of caseworkers just do the job because the flexibility of it. They don't care about taking action and do as little as possible. The others, who are already overworked due to staffing, have to pick up slack and clean up messes from previous caseworkers.
Not all of it, but a good portion of the problem is hiring the wrong people AND not taking care of the good people on the job.
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Mar 09, 2014Comments: 20 · Posts: 1771 · Topics: 32
I'm not trying to be shady its just I know a lot and can say a lot. I get upset and I don't want to end up in the principals office for blasting on the internet.
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Feb 04, 2013Comments: 1 · Posts: 9186 · Topics: 179
LIB SUCKS! How dare she put this information out there??? What a bitch!
I mean
BUMP
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Jan 05, 2014Comments: 23 · Posts: 2298 · Topics: 37
Please refer to "FixedWater's Just For The Record" thread created March 12, 2014 on my page (FixedWater)for any comments you may have in reference to this thread that pertains to Myself, my daughter or my Ex.
Thankyou in Advance,
FixedWater
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Apr 13, 2005Comments: 0 · Posts: 44084 · Topics: 685
I find it so sad for her daughter, in that she doesn't have a mother who cares more than her ego.
she even refers to herself in the 3rd person ... and capitalizes myself.
She is so concerned about her image that it takes priority over the realization that by virtue of letting him take the child - she permits him to do all those horrible things she says he does.
I feel so sorry for the kid .... children are suppose to be able to have their parent to turn to ... and her parents are too busy worrying about themselves.
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Feb 04, 2013Comments: 1 · Posts: 9186 · Topics: 179
When you are raised by a naricissist, and don't break the chain we all know their will be another apple that doesn't fall far from the tree. That thread & everyone who joined in are all a pathetic example. TRUTH.
I say this all the time in these forums...ASTROLOGY DON'T MEAN SHIT...upbringing does. FACT