Scorpio fear of being hurt - how long does it take to relax?

All you Scorps out there with a big fear of rejection and being hurt.

How long does it take you to "let someone in" and what does it take?

For me I usually let people in pretty quickly and get to know them / form bonds but all the way I am watching them like a hawk and recording all their actions. If I really like them and feel pretty vulberable as if I might like them enough for them to have the power to hurt me - then I can push them away, test them and maybe do stuff to try and make them prove they want or need me before I feel safe.

I am dating someone who's a Scorp (Scorp Merc, sun AND Venus) and Cappy moon and he's nothing like me. He has the walls up right from the start and it's very hard to get close to him. He's a lot more scared of being hurt or intimate than me and he does a lot to keep a distance between us.

For Scorps more like him...when does it stop? What helps?

Posted by AlaniaB
All you Scorps out there with a big fear of rejection and being hurt.

How long does it take you to "let someone in" and what does it take?

For me I usually let people in pretty quickly and get to know them / form bonds but all the way I am watching them like a hawk and recording all their actions. If I really like them and feel pretty vulberable as if I might like them enough for them to have the power to hurt me - then I can push them away, test them and maybe do stuff to try and make them prove they want or need me before I feel safe.

I am dating someone who's a Scorp (Scorp Merc, sun AND Venus) and Cappy moon and he's nothing like me. He has the walls up right from the start and it's very hard to get close to him. He's a lot more scared of being hurt or intimate than me and he does a lot to keep a distance between us.

For Scorps more like him...when does it stop? What helps?

This is exactly the situation I face with my female Scorpio. Hot/Cold... Opens up and then gets quiet.. Calls me, talks for hours then goes days without even a text.. She's been hurt before with a failed engagement.. Trust issues! I don't know what to do half the time. Stay the course? I open up to her, but now I feel I just need to let her miss me.. It's frustrating but I know we have an attraction and a really great bond! We've gotten to know each other really well the last couple of years and when we have intense conversations I feel she may step back but she keeps coming at me. I just don't like the days in between our talks.. I'm open, she's guarded!

Do Scorpios ever unclench they always have their guard up no matter how close you are to them. There are days you look at them they just have that blank look you know they have something on their mind but they won't say anything. I can be the same I do have my guard up maybe not as much as a Scorpio being a Cancer man. My ex Scorpio boss he would have the same blank look.

I think Scorps are easily hurt when they let people into their lives relationships with Scorpios are not that smooth the people with them can't handle it and leave.

Once I start to like someone I start putting that wall up. Funny how I can meet someone and be all out there right away. Confident, secure, sure about myself, proud.... Once the heart gets involved I start questioning how they feel, how I feel, what to say, how much to say.

Posted by Aramei
Once I start to like someone I start putting that wall up. Funny how I can meet someone and be all out there right away. Confident, secure, sure about myself, proud.... Once the heart gets involved I start questioning how they feel, how I feel, what to say, how much to say.

Funny you say that, he was very open at first, then suddenly put a wall up

Just be patient with him. He needs to know he can trust you with his heart and secrets in it.