Scorpio sun, rising and venus..

This topic was created in the Scorpio forum by shortii on Thursday, July 23, 2015 and has 38 replies.
Seriously starting to think this is Satan in the flesh (this man anyway)

My main questions are this.
1. Why is this combo so manipulativery and narcissistic?
2. Why can they never admit being wrong. .like pulling teeth. Seriously
3. Doesn't make an effort to treat me right but doesn't want to lose me either. Is this normal for these placements?

I know that I can't really generalize, but in this case I will. Lol

Thank you

Posted by Arrius
My goodness, you do have a problem. Seriously. The pat answer when you are not being treated well is to swim away, but here you have gotten yourself involved with a Scorpio. Not so easy.

1. Scorps are manipulative, but so are we. I suspect that with Venus in Aries (and Cancer ascendant) you want to "lead" in the relationship and have him "follow." That's certainly not going to happen. Narcissistic? Hmmm. They're very self-absorbed. Usually not obnoxiously so, but it's there.

2. He's a man. He's a fixed sign. He's a Scorp.

3. Yes, and herein lies the problem. It's no excuse for his behavior, but because you are a Pisces I'm giving you the "slant eye," wondering what else is going on?

Side eye respected but not necessary here. My scorpio had a porn issue. . Major one. Hides it from me but not the rest of the world. That's issue #1.
I actually don't want to lead in the relationship, as my venus would predict, just be an equal really. Problem for him. He wants to lead and then does nothing. ..i.e. control. He wants what he wants when he wants it but does nothing to support it.

This one is a narcissist. It's his way or no way. He wants to me to do what he wants to make his life better when he wants it..but again..does nothing to support it. Wanted me to start a business that he could take over. When I told him to start it himself...I was the blame. He gets jealous that I make more money than he does. He got mad when he was the sole bread winner. And did I mention that he's never wrong? He's not.

3. There are deeper issues here..mostly with trust. I don't trust him. Did but he's worn that down over time. There are some issues th at I caused...as well. I have asked for forgiveness and changed those issues. He refuses to do so.

Posted by FrostAndBite
After all these years it still stupefies me when women come on here and list nothing but terrible qualities of a man and then ask for help in understanding them or affecting their behavior. Why do women waste time on dickbags?

This one I'm married to with kids . Only reason why I've wasted time on this d*ckbag. Otherwise I wouldn't have.
Posted by Impulsv
Well u know the answer, walk away.
I've met men as u described in another sign

Agreed. Im sure that it's not just this placement. But others too.
Posted by Rabbit
Should have led with the married part...

correct , rabbit. I should have.
Didn't want that to skew the responses that I got.
Posted by Impulsv
Posted by shortii
Posted by Impulsv
Well u know the answer, walk away.
I've met men as u described in another sign

Agreed. Im sure that it's not just this placement. But others too.

He has no Scorpio in his chart lol
click to expand

LOL
seriously, the other guy you know like this has no Scorp in his chart at all?
What is he? Lol what's in his chart? ???
Posted by GetMisted
Posted by shortii
Posted by Rabbit
Should have led with the married part...

correct , rabbit. I should have.
Didn't want that to skew the responses that I got.

That's exactly what leaving out information does.
click to expand

True
Posted by Impulsv
Posted by shortii
Posted by Impulsv
Posted by shortii
Posted by Impulsv
Well u know the answer, walk away.
I've met men as u described in another sign

Agreed. Im sure that it's not just this placement. But others too.

He has no Scorpio in his chart lol

LOL
seriously, the other guy you know like this has no Scorp in his chart at all?
What is he? Lol what's in his chart? ???

Taurus
Cap moon
Venus Aries cancer Mars
Porn addition addiction as well

click to expand

Is he dealing with it or just still in denial?
I have two of those placements and I can relate with

1.
and
2.

sometimes

3.
Posted by Wynter
I have two of those placements and I can relate with

1.
and
2.

sometimes

3.

Wynter- what is the loss that is terrifying that it's easier to alienate a partner than just admit fault and heal? Why is it so impossible?
Posted by FrostAndBite
After all these years it still stupefies me when women come on here and list nothing but terrible qualities of a man and then ask for help in understanding them or affecting their behavior. Why do women waste time on dickbags?

torture??? Confused
Posted by Nemilicious
it´s not fear - it´s pride. something you might want to read about.

scorpion pride?
Stubborn pride. smile
Posted by busyeyes88
Posted by Impulsv
Posted by shortii
Posted by Impulsv
Posted by shortii
Posted by Impulsv
Well u know the answer, walk away.
I've met men as u described in another sign

Agreed. Im sure that it's not just this placement. But others too.

He has no Scorpio in his chart lol

LOL
seriously, the other guy you know like this has no Scorp in his chart at all?
What is he? Lol what's in his chart? ???

Taurus
Cap moon
Venus Aries cancer Mars
Porn addition addiction as well


That sounds like taurus. Taurus love their porn.
click to expand

Soo attracted to Taurus too.. LOL maybe I should run the other way? LOL
Posted by Wynter
Stubborn pride. smile

Thank you.. I will for sure.
And that is why he's lost me for good. Stubborn pride...can't see past self.
Posted by Taniwha
Posted by shortii
And that is why he's lost me for good. Stubborn pride...can't see past self.

You'll be back, they always come back.
click to expand

nah...not this tone around. Very few can see through Scorp bull but we can. When we pisces are done...it's a wrap. Especially when. We know that there's no hope or that the person isn't going to change.
Posted by Arielle83
I know what it is.


Is he a mommy's boy?

Not really in the classic / text book sense. BUT.. he does find it very hard to confront her on anything. She did NOT baby him growing up. In fact, just the opposite. but he will not call her out on things that she does wrong. If she says jump.. she will ask it in such a way that he eventually asks how high.
Posted by Arielle83
I'm married to a scorp with Taurus rising and Venus scorp. He likes porn as well, but I prob watch just as much, if not more than him.

He's had his lazy moments and his self involved moments. I just see men as all being little boys and they expect wifey to think the moon shines out of their ass just like mommy did.

I can count on one hand how much porn i watched in the past 10 years. Not my thing... no disrespect to you or your hubby.. just not my gig.
Him? Sheesh you would think he's quitting meth.

Moments of self involvement and laziness are fine.. but as a habit.. no.
@Arielle
yes. She's very much a manipulator and he doesn't see it. He's passive agressive because of it. I don't give in so he goes back and complains to her and his sister about me.. and they stick up for him to me. They want to get involved ..I don't allow it.

Yes. He's been involved in porn since he was 14 or so. It's not the fact that he views it that bothers me. It's the reasons why. It's almost as if he creates excusea to justify his reasons. Then hides it. I dont look for it at all too see what he's doing. I usually just come across it doing things that I need to on our computer. And come across it. I think he leaves it discoverable to start a fight and then justify his reasons for going to it again. I'm sure it's gotten pretty deep and I'm not impressed at all.

But overall, I see your point. He does have mommy issues. Well he can work them out on his own. I've spent enough time.
Posted by GetMisted
Posted by shortii
Posted by Rabbit
Should have led with the married part...

correct , rabbit. I should have.
Didn't want that to skew the responses that I got.

That's exactly what leaving out information does.
click to expand


lol...



Posted by shortii
@Arielle
Yes. He's been involved in porn since he was 14 or so. It's not the fact that he views it that bothers me. It's the reasons why.


....and YOU MARRIED HIM without bothering to find out why. Let's discuss that.
Posted by LetltB
Posted by shortii
@Arielle
Yes. He's been involved in porn since he was 14 or so. It's not the fact that he views it that bothers me. It's the reasons why.


....and YOU MARRIED HIM without bothering to find out why. Let's discuss that.
click to expand

Hold on there.. Arielle is right. I wasn't aware of how deep his porn situation was until much later. MUCH MUCH later. Most of it was hidden away from me. Even after we were married. He didn't even give an honest reason for many years.
Posted by Arielle83
You don't learn all this shit on your wedding day.

It comes out months and years later when they know they've locked you down!!

ABSOLUTELY. very very calculating.
Posted by shortii
Posted by LetltB
Posted by shortii
@Arielle
Yes. He's been involved in porn since he was 14 or so. It's not the fact that he views it that bothers me. It's the reasons why.


....and YOU MARRIED HIM without bothering to find out why. Let's discuss that.

Hold on there.. Arielle is right. I wasn't aware of how deep his porn situation was until much later. MUCH MUCH later. Most of it was hidden away from me. Even after we were married. He didn't even give an honest reason for many years.

click to expand

So what are you saying? There are laws in your state that say you can't leave with the kids and divorce him? Or do you feel your kids seeing you miserable and being married to a pervert is the answer?
Posted by shortii
I usually just come across it doing things that I need to on our computer. And come across it. I think he leaves it discoverable to start a fight and then justify his reasons for going to it again.

Great...how many times have the kids "come across it"?
Posted by Reincarnation
So am I the only Scorp man who dislikes pornography?

you just might be, reincarnation. Your just might be. Lol
Posted by LetltB
Posted by shortii
I usually just come across it doing things that I need to on our computer. And come across it. I think he leaves it discoverable to start a fight and then justify his reasons for going to it again.

Great...how many times have the kids "come across it"?
click to expand

never
Posted by LetltB
Posted by shortii
Posted by LetltB
Posted by shortii
@Arielle
Yes. He's been involved in porn since he was 14 or so. It's not the fact that he views it that bothers me. It's the reasons why.


....and YOU MARRIED HIM without bothering to find out why. Let's discuss that.

Hold on there.. Arielle is right. I wasn't aware of how deep his porn situation was until much later. MUCH MUCH later. Most of it was hidden away from me. Even after we were married. He didn't even give an honest reason for many years.


So what are you saying? There are laws in your state that say you can't leave with the kids and divorce him? Or do you feel your kids seeing you miserable and being married to a pervert is the answer?
click to expand

Neither but it seems to have struck a cord.
Struck a cord with who? you? All I'm seeing here is you whining and playing victim. In fact you've displayed most of what your original post states with your responses. Especially the narcissistic part. One thing about narcissists...always the victim and looking for support. (supply)

You knock him down completely and suggest it's his birth chart, then his family. What aren't you sharing with us about you? What did you expect to gain from this thread other than sympathy I guess is my question.



Posted by Arielle83
If he can't express his issues with mom, I'm guessing she's got a more dominant personality to him. Maybe she's emasculated him in some way. Maybe he needs to ascert his man hood by dominating you. Telling you what to do. Making you do the work. Slacking off makes him feel powerful because he's got other ppl running around for him. That's what these scorp boys want, some sort of power or feeling of being in control. If he's in shambles in his personal life and he can't control it, you'll be the one he tells what to do.

My husband has issues with his mom because she's a manipulator. I see it and ignore it but when she gives him shit he takes it out on me. The frustration is what he expresses. I just walk away and do my thing. 5 hours later he's all cool and respectful. You got to not give in no matter what the brat wants.

The porn thing is something that he's prob been into since he's 13 or whatever. He gets off on hiding it from you like he did with his mommy. That's part of the addiction. If you are more open about it and not look at it as disgusting and feral, he will be more open about it. He might feel shame about it and begin to resent you and then hide more
.

You don't have to like it or watch it but he'll prob do it no matter what so better to just accept it cuz the more he hides this shit, the deeper it might go.

sorry to hear about that, arielle, that he takes it out on you...
due to his frustration with his mother.
it's good you walk away.
Posted by LetltB
Struck a cord with who? you? All I'm seeing here is you whining and playing victim. In fact you've displayed most of what your original post states with your responses. Especially the narcissistic part. One thing about narcissists...always the victim and looking for support. (supply)

You knock him down completely and suggest it's his birth chart, then his family. What aren't you sharing with us about you? What did you expect to gain from this thread other than sympathy I guess is my question.





if I wanted sympathy I would have asked for it. I clearly didnt.
If I wanted support, I would have asked for it as well.. I didn't.

I came to this thread seeking opinion. Yours noted as well.


Posted by shortii
And that is why he's lost me for good. Stubborn pride...can't see past self.

thing is, why are you trying to force him to be one way?? i dont understand the complaint about porn.

if he likes it, he likes it. you can't make him do anything if he don't want.
Lisa
It ok. Don't worry about it.
Thank you for your time.
Posted by shortii
Lisa
It ok. Don't worry about it.
Thank you for your time.

oh ok. you're welcome. hope you work things out.
Posted by shortii
And that is why he's lost me for good. Stubborn pride...can't see past self.

well, stubbornness is an automatism. It's intrinsic. He has no control over it.

Full mouth? right? IDK maybe some people think that the stubborn can learn to change himself. I must be too accepting. Or hopeless? IRDK.
Your story reminds me of the one in "The Unbearable Lightness of Being". The man was sleeping each night with another girl. The wife had nightmares every night. That she's nacked and shamefull.

See it positive. Your man does not sleep with other girls. Only with their projections.
Ok, it smells of power struggle between the two of you.
When did it start? In the few past years? Or right in the third year of marriage?

Maybe you have a forbidden Moon or Venus (or AC)? Is anyone of them in a fixed sign?

Please, don't get me wrong. I do not try to make you the bad girl. I'm only handling this as an astrology thing. Afterall in a fixed-fixed square/opposition it's nobody's fault if things go wrong. It's just Physics. In other words Chemistry? (Isn't Chemistry the special case of Physics?)