Scorpio's and Communication defects?
This topic was created in the Scorpio forum by TheLioness79 on Sunday, June 30, 2013 and has 7 replies.
I ended a long friendship with my Scorpio friend about a year ago. It was basically a fall regarding planning and communication. However, she stung me with very cold words and brought one of my children into it so I iced her out and dropped her like that. I am a very forgiving person but 1. You don't say cold hearted things to people you love (we were like sisters) 2. You NEVER bring children into it negatively especially a Lioness's children. She will rip you apart when it comes to her young.
So the situation was her Farther's retirement party. She wanted me to help her with it. Backtrack a couple of months, she was moving and wanted my ex and my help with it. OK cool. She called a Friday night asking where we were. Uh, you just mentioned Sat. Moving day, nothing else. Need to tell me what you need from me. So we went over early Sat. And she still wasn't fully ready to move or secured a new apt. I drove her around and finally she ended up sticking with the same apt complex. So as she signed papers I coordinated the moving of her stuff and getting the rental truck. She wanted us to come back over Sunday and I just couldn't. I have horrible back problems and couldn't even walk. Ex husband went and she got pissed at me for not coming. WTF?? I can barely make it to the bathroom with the nerve pain.
So July 4th last year she was talking to me about the prep plans for the retirement party. I told her: Tell me what you need me to do, when you need me and so forth. I need a schedule as we were going into close at work and I would be very busy. Never said a word. Other personal things were going on with my youngest daughter and she was visiting my mother who lives by my work. On Friday mom called me with some issues. So I went over to my moms and spent some time with my child. When I left and checked my cell VM, she had left 3 nasty msg asking where I was. WTF??? You never said when you needed me. When I talked to her she was getting nasty and I said look, I said to you on July 4th xyz because I wanted to be clear with what you needed from me ESP after what happened when you moved. You are so high all the time you don't remember anything. (BTW...she smokes pot daily and I know the person she is when she does smoke and when she doesn't) that is when she got nasty and brought my daughter into it.
Do Scorpios normally have issues with communication?
So the situation was her Farther's retirement party. She wanted me to help her with it. Backtrack a couple of months, she was moving and wanted my ex and my help with it. OK cool. She called a Friday night asking where we were. Uh, you just mentioned Sat. Moving day, nothing else. Need to tell me what you need from me. So we went over early Sat. And she still wasn't fully ready to move or secured a new apt. I drove her around and finally she ended up sticking with the same apt complex. So as she signed papers I coordinated the moving of her stuff and getting the rental truck. She wanted us to come back over Sunday and I just couldn't. I have horrible back problems and couldn't even walk. Ex husband went and she got pissed at me for not coming. WTF?? I can barely make it to the bathroom with the nerve pain.
So July 4th last year she was talking to me about the prep plans for the retirement party. I told her: Tell me what you need me to do, when you need me and so forth. I need a schedule as we were going into close at work and I would be very busy. Never said a word. Other personal things were going on with my youngest daughter and she was visiting my mother who lives by my work. On Friday mom called me with some issues. So I went over to my moms and spent some time with my child. When I left and checked my cell VM, she had left 3 nasty msg asking where I was. WTF??? You never said when you needed me. When I talked to her she was getting nasty and I said look, I said to you on July 4th xyz because I wanted to be clear with what you needed from me ESP after what happened when you moved. You are so high all the time you don't remember anything. (BTW...she smokes pot daily and I know the person she is when she does smoke and when she doesn't) that is when she got nasty and brought my daughter into it.
Do Scorpios normally have issues with communication?
Yes, I am Leo Sun. I will say she did not threaten my child just said negative things about her. During this time there were personal issues arising with her that was very stressful. But one thing you don't do, attack a persons child in any manner. I will say, she was a true friend. There was mutual giving and taking. I could count on her and she could count on me for anything. Funny thing, she claims that I always take take take, which is bull shit and especially not a Leo's character. During that time I was taking more as my life was falling apart all over. But the year prior she went thru similar situations and I took out a loan to help her pay rent. One day she called and I could tell she was having a breakdown with her life circumstances and after we hung up, I dropped everything and went to her home made her open the door picked her ass off the floor and put her ass in my car. I took her to my home and put her in my bed and was just there for her. Things didn't start getting rocky until last year when my life was in shambles and I was not the normal person I am and couldn't give as I normally do, I was so spread thin trying to keep my life, home, and family together that I did fail to be that friend I usually was. But that is life, isn't it? That is why it still hurts for me to have lost her because she was a good friend in my life, she had been there for me over the 10 yr friendship. But just as the Leo I am, I can give all of myself to people, but the moment you cross boundaries that I feel are essentially I will ice you out just like you never existed. She did two unacceptable things that I laid out in my above post.
I will also add, I would like to slowly bring the friendship back. There is to much positive and good history there. I am in more of position where I am putting my life together and shed things that was pulling me down (ex husband) and I am getting myself back together. I truly do miss her dearly. We were thick as thieves.
The amazing Scorpio powers of seeing into the soul, she has been one of two people who could see into me, my vulnerabilities and all, that us Leo's protect fiercely. She helped me through so many things and vice versa. This was the first time she ever ever did anything like this.
The amazing Scorpio powers of seeing into the soul, she has been one of two people who could see into me, my vulnerabilities and all, that us Leo's protect fiercely. She helped me through so many things and vice versa. This was the first time she ever ever did anything like this.
Jynja,
I iced her out for the cruel things she said to me and for yes mentioning my daughter in a negative way.
I am forgiving, but there are degrees to that. She crossed a degree that was very deep. This has taken a lot of reflection over and one thing it does come down to is trust. She broke trust with me that I am unsure is salvageable. If I trust you with myself from the inside out and you use that against me, even in anger, it will be hard for me to give that trust back. And attacking my child verbally to me, that is not acceptable and something that I never in my life expected from her. But, do I want to go through life with a regret? A regret of not giving something that was so beautiful (our friendship) another chance. A chance to gain back what we once had? Yes, it has taken me a long time to get to this point but other things in my personal life needed my attention more and took precedence.
She will not stop the pot smoking. She doesn't see the harm it is doing to herself and other aspects of her life. But she smoked our entire friendship. At times less at times more. Towards the end, it was much much more. So yes, that may never change and only she can make that change.
I want my friend, my sister back.
I iced her out for the cruel things she said to me and for yes mentioning my daughter in a negative way.
I am forgiving, but there are degrees to that. She crossed a degree that was very deep. This has taken a lot of reflection over and one thing it does come down to is trust. She broke trust with me that I am unsure is salvageable. If I trust you with myself from the inside out and you use that against me, even in anger, it will be hard for me to give that trust back. And attacking my child verbally to me, that is not acceptable and something that I never in my life expected from her. But, do I want to go through life with a regret? A regret of not giving something that was so beautiful (our friendship) another chance. A chance to gain back what we once had? Yes, it has taken me a long time to get to this point but other things in my personal life needed my attention more and took precedence.
She will not stop the pot smoking. She doesn't see the harm it is doing to herself and other aspects of her life. But she smoked our entire friendship. At times less at times more. Towards the end, it was much much more. So yes, that may never change and only she can make that change.
I want my friend, my sister back.
Sun Sagittarius 0.16
Moon Scorpio 6.13
Mercury Scorpio 11.23
Venus Capricorn 17.02
Mars Aries 25.23 R
Jupiter Aquarius 6.55
Saturn Cancer 3.34 R
Uranus Libra 25.39
Neptune Sagittarius 6.55
Pluto Libra 6.13
Lilith Capricorn 11.02
Asc node Sagittarius 28.44
Not sure if this is right. Don't have time of birth, not exactly sure if where she grew up was her place of birth. Her dad was prior military and she was born late in life.
Moon Scorpio 6.13
Mercury Scorpio 11.23
Venus Capricorn 17.02
Mars Aries 25.23 R
Jupiter Aquarius 6.55
Saturn Cancer 3.34 R
Uranus Libra 25.39
Neptune Sagittarius 6.55
Pluto Libra 6.13
Lilith Capricorn 11.02
Asc node Sagittarius 28.44
Not sure if this is right. Don't have time of birth, not exactly sure if where she grew up was her place of birth. Her dad was prior military and she was born late in life.
Jynja
I said I was unsure if the trust was not salvageable not that it wasn't. Doesn't mean it can't be. I will be more cautious in with my inner self around her as I am with most people. But trust can be regained. Hell, my ex cheated on me early in our relationship while I was pregnant with said daughter. Most women would have not taken that person back. Due to circumstances and understanding of who he was and what lead to the infidelity, I did. It took 2 yrs to gain my trust back but we worked at it. We were together for a dozen more years after that incident, and I do not feel to this day my ex stepped outside our relationship again. Being unsure about something is different then certainty. There is room for it to go one way or the other. Her attacking my daughter threw me for a loop and I still don't get as she held the same views about her own child, only deduction was to hurt me.
I am looking at this in this manner: historically we had a strong relationship. What she did was a first occurrence. So I tread lightly and slowly move with it. First and foremost their must be communication about what brought this fall out. That has to be panned out and her willingness as well. And yes woe to her if she does such a thing again. That will be part of that communication part and establishing that is not acceptable and setting those boundaries.
I said I was unsure if the trust was not salvageable not that it wasn't. Doesn't mean it can't be. I will be more cautious in with my inner self around her as I am with most people. But trust can be regained. Hell, my ex cheated on me early in our relationship while I was pregnant with said daughter. Most women would have not taken that person back. Due to circumstances and understanding of who he was and what lead to the infidelity, I did. It took 2 yrs to gain my trust back but we worked at it. We were together for a dozen more years after that incident, and I do not feel to this day my ex stepped outside our relationship again. Being unsure about something is different then certainty. There is room for it to go one way or the other. Her attacking my daughter threw me for a loop and I still don't get as she held the same views about her own child, only deduction was to hurt me.
I am looking at this in this manner: historically we had a strong relationship. What she did was a first occurrence. So I tread lightly and slowly move with it. First and foremost their must be communication about what brought this fall out. That has to be panned out and her willingness as well. And yes woe to her if she does such a thing again. That will be part of that communication part and establishing that is not acceptable and setting those boundaries.
Jynja, it could be my Leo in Venus that lends to problems of forgiveness when I feel a deep betrayal in close relationship??
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