scorpio's and friendships

This topic was created in the Scorpio forum by Octoberbaby91 on Wednesday, July 22, 2015 and has 13 replies.
I wanted to post this topic because for awhile now I have been reflecting on why I have trouble finding a lifetime friend. Maybe it is a high expectations thing or I'm actually having trouble attracting the right type of people to be friends with. Whenever I ended a friendship it turned out my intuition about the person was right and I remained on guard for a reason. Im working on attracting positive like-minded people in my life. I don't like superficial friendships I actually a want a lifetime friend. I have 2 friends I've known for years and we still keep in touch. We were never hanging out 24/7 but we would hang out every now and then and call each other for holidays and birthdays and I cherish them dearly, I moved to another state a year ago so I want another lifetime friend that lives in my city so I can go shopping with, chat with, travel with and just have a genuine connection with overall. I knew since I was a child I was always selective and conscious about who I befriend. I'm really picky and i just want to be around positive genuine people that I CAN TRUST. It was always hard for me because when I observe the people who I tried to have a connection with I would see their bad traits and just run for the hills. I mean traits like unloyal, jealousy, backstabbing, gossip and using type people. Some I tried to stick around and help but I grew very tired they drained my energy. Of course everyone has flaws including myself but it has been very hard to find people with the basic characters I look for in a friend because I know deep down if I can trust the person I will always be there and I know they won't take advantage of me.

I can say that I treat friendships as if I would treat a romantic relationship I look for long lasting relationships I am super black and white about most things.

Have any other scorpios have the same trouble? If so do share! Is it because we are true loners and need a lot of space? What zodiac signs should I look for in finding more people that's compatible with me? I would appreciate advice just no negativity drama on this thread is welcome i don't play that LOL.
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FYI I'm referring to girls I don't have trouble with being friends with guys probably because I'm slightly a tomboy and really mellow.
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All scorps have trust issues because we have the ability to detect lies thats a curse and a bless for us
I think TRUST its a invisible bridge that connects people with each other
If you are willing to trust you will find the trust maybe not today not tomorrow but for sure oneday you will find it.
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thanks guys you all have a point. It can be mine intuitive side that can smell bs from a mile away that keeps me closed off sometimes. My mom is a pisces and she had 1 best friend they grew apart though. I guess I can be more open when I do I just always pick up people energy things that's not being sad and true intentions where i just change my mind and I'm just like sigh nvm I know I have to be on guard after observing people's shady sides.
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The Scorps I know have extremely long term/bonded friendships. I think the thing that stands out to me about their friends who they've known, still love, and keep up with for 10/15/20 years is that they accept people for who they are. They may not always LIKE the people, but they love them to death. They understand that the traits that you see in humans that turns you off is something that is in all people. Some of those traits are just more prominent in some than they are in others. At least that's what they've told me...I don't ask, they just explain why they are and remain friends with that person...what it is that they like about them.

Another thing that I noticed about Scorps is that you guys are WAY more empathetic than you come off. I know that I recently disappointed a Scorp friend by how I handled my ex...by telling him exactly what it is that I like about my new guy that I couldn't seem to establish with him. I thought I was pretty fair and I didn't say anything mean. She (the Scorp) was more aware than anyone else how much love was between us and she felt like I should have spared his feelings. I did consider what she said and maybe she was right. At the time, I thought/felt like I was giving him insight, but after my convo with her...and she really was upfront about how she felt about my actions (which I appreciate), I realized that I really did it for me. I'm pretty stable so in reality, I could have passed on doing that and did something else to purge my feelings/thoughts. Basically, maybe bonding with other empathetic people might help.
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Posted by Octoberbaby91
I can say that I treat friendships as if I would treat a romantic relationship I look for long lasting relationships I am super black and white about most things.

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This may be your problem. While I think there are several benefits to being a fixed sign, being too rigid can make it impossible to find what you're looking for. As you pointed out, people are flawed. Flaws do not fit well in a black and white world. Therefore, you have a few choices. Learn to become more flexible in your thinking and expectations of other or hold tight to the notion that Scorps are "true loners that need space" (btw, I have no idea what that has to do with anything you wrote above other than it being an excuse).

Also, you may want to ease up on the approach of going into friendship looking for them to be a long lasting relationship. I have found the one that turn out that way happened because it wasn't forced and filled with the expectation that it would be anything more than getting to know someone, sharing a few jokes and taking it day by day. My friends and I just grew, bump heads a long the way many many times and continued to grow. I've been rolling with the same girls (and one guy) since high school.

Posted by Octoberbaby91
Have any other scorpios have the same trouble? If so do share!
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I experienced similar difficulties when I was younger to an extent. Once I learned (still learning btw) to chill out and not be so rigid I stopped putting up road blocks to the type of platonic relationships I wanted.
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I don't look for friends I come across them have a few conversations get to know them and usually they want to start hanging out because we are good conversationalist. I don't intentionally look for things they come across me after spending time with them. I can accept people for who they are but if they display fakes, gossip and unloyalty that's when I get irritated and feel like I can not be this person friend because they give off that they don't know how to be a friend. It's like I attract insecure people with character issues and I always end up helping them with advice or just building up there confidence. I just want to surround myself with like minded people who are confident and trustworthy. I can't trust people who show me how fake they are and the amusing part is on a random day if we are out and they see someone they know I swear 2 times I have heard two different women speak to people they dislike and turn around in tell me in the same breathe "I'm so fake hahaha" referring to themselves. I'm like ummm you definitely showed me you were seriously being fake i JUST GET TURNED OFF and then I slowly back away. Turns out I have been right about them the whole time. At first they would seem great and then I see they lack the basic characters that every friend should be. I always end up being around those who can call me for anything but I can't call them for help or to listen because of the unloyalty. What signs should I give a try? I have noticed that those women were opposite from my compatibility as well. I had one cancer friend that I was friends with for a long time but she was going through things all the time very moody and just disappeared I used to stop by her house all the time to bring some positivity into her world.
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I didn't see your post Phoenix until I logged out dxp have so many glitches they don't show what everyone says. You do have a point but as I said I don't force friendships I do my own thing majority of my time. My black and white thinking can be a road block its all or nothing with me I'm learning to dabble in the gray area sometimes.

Lol Impuslv I'm 23 single and working on my career men are just easier to get along with. One of my closest friends back home is a gay male Aries he is hilarious and so kind smile
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Posted by xoxoRain
My best friend is a Scorpio, and I a Taurus. We have our clique and the group of us are 1 Scorpio, 1 Taurus, 1 cancer, and 1 Pisces. We've all been friends since childhood so u can say we are lifetime friends. Maybe look for those signs?

One out of the 2 closest friends is actually a Taurus and the friend that was a Cancer we were great friends since high school but she disappeared and unfollowed me on Instagram. I haven't talked to her since she tried to move to Texas to leave our hometown I can sense she was trying to move in with me and my family but we had no room after I moved I sent her a text told her I love her and she can visit me anytime and haven't heard from her since
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Posted by Reincarnation
Sag men are my best friends.

Cool dudes.

I been friends with a sag guy since the 8th grade we still talk he has tried to hit on me a few times though :/ lol
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Posted by xoxoRain
My best friend is a Scorpio, and I a Taurus. We have our clique and the group of us are 1 Scorpio, 1 Taurus, 1 cancer, and 1 Pisces. We've all been friends since childhood so u can say we are lifetime friends. Maybe look for those signs?

Hmph *squint*. My circle:

1 Bull
1 Crab
1 Fish
(I'm the Scorp)

There may be something to this grouping.
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I've noticed Scorpio women have very few friends not sure why I think it has to do with your trust issues.
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I was this way most of my life. I made friends but never that "soul mate best friend" until a few years ago. my best friend is now an Aries, and she is the greatest friend I have ever had. we get along great. we both have the same mindsets. there was one day that I was looking into Star Wars auditions and we missed chicagos so I said "hey wanna drive down to Nashville with me next week to try out just for the heck of it" and we went. we have traveled many times since then. insatiable wanderlust, infinite trust. I have never had a better friend who understands me as well as her.

my other great friends right now are: Leo, Aries, Aquarius, Libra and Gemini. my longstanding Libra male friend has been alongside me also, always encouraging me to keep going in music. My newest Aqua friend is the same. These signs to me are just like their element, a breath of fresh air. They are kind, understanding and intellectuals. The fire signs are wonderful. We are saucy together and have wild fun. I am pretty laid back but love partying. These signs are like me in that way.

When I was younger I mostly had Scorp, Pisces, Taurus, Capricorn friends, none of which were long lasting. The Scorp in fact was the worst. She would connive against me and plot. If I liked a boy she made sure to sabotage the relationship and take him for herself. Our birthdays were 2 days apart. None of the other signs were terrible friends to me, we just slowly drifted apart. There was a point when I thought I'd never have a true best friend like other people had (age 18) but that all changed (age 19).
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