The broken man...

This topic was created in the Scorpio forum by OmagaIII on Friday, September 13, 2013 and has 13 replies.
http://www.dxpnet.com/opinion/taurus/the-broken-man-4296113.asp

Please Scorpio ladies, I need some advice. Would you be so kind to have a look at my Taurus writing found above. Any help would be great.
So I have had some good feedback, but I would definitely appreciate a bit more insight lady Scorps.
um, wow. i read page after page. you have my deepest sympathy on this one.
what im getting is maybe she probably picked up possessiveness in you, and that could have reminded her of the old ex. maybe you didnt say anything out of the ordinary or act out when the other man came around, but at the same time, your possessiveness was probably written on your face and told on itself in your body language. i feel it was exaggerated more on her part though. after all, you didnt clobber the guy. plus, like you mentioned, she got a bit possessive as well when that other woman questioned you. (damn scorps and their double standards) it's obvious she likes you but is scared about it. she says she doesn't want a relationship, but she slowly allowed herself to drift towards the familiar feelings of one. earth signs are good at making others feel secure, and from what you posted, she was feeling very secure with you. why she switched up could be a number of factors; the problem is you can never quite pin point with scorpio women.
another possibility is maybe she had a liking for this other man as well, but didnt want you to know about it. hence the not looking being able to look you in the eye. knowing she doesn't want to tie herself down, ms. scorp more than likely wants to keep her options open without losing a good guy for future possibilities in the process. but when her stinger picked up on your possessiveness, it seemed to be a red flag for her. to be honest, i think she is torn between her feelings of wanting to be with you and not wanting a relationship. she is scared, that's why she didnt tie you down already. sure, you're a good man and she knows it, but there's always that pesky 'what if' apprehension in the back of our minds. i strongly think the new man has a part in this sudden behavior as well. she can't choose right now, so it's easier for her limit her association with you. a scorp wont tell you everything because feelings are too difficult to word.
i would just disappear until she got her feelings together. if she really cared, she would try to get you back. if she doesnt care, she'd let you be gone and stay gone. it wouldnt hurt to test it out and see where she really stands.
my God... smdh. i feel for your current situation. i applaud and respect your patience and honesty. that's why i love the bulls. they never prod. they try not to step on anyone's toes. i hope this woman is worth the trouble, because you seem very outstanding. *hug
@Sasori701
Thanks, you'r insight is really appreciated. I really feel that through discussing this I am learning more and more about her and myself. I also feel she might be confused. I respect that enough since I have a similar problem expressing myself from time to time. It is just so so weird that with her, I haven't really had this problem, since from the start she knew how I felt, I could open up, and she was still there. Effectively, I feel that she actually made me feel even more secure, more solid and stable. I think I need to back off a bit, as hard as it is for me to switch off for the time being. Maybe similar to when she disappears and goes hot and cold on.
I honestly feel that she IS worth it, she is so real, so kind, so deep and sensual so passionate and attractive en every form of her being. I am intoxicated, and this is way I have reacted the way I have. Thanks again, I really do appreciate your input. Me being me, doesn't usually ask for help with this type of stuff, since I also struggle with my emotions. This time around, however, she is way to special and important to discard.
FYI, the previous guy wasn't possessive at all, he actually kept her at a distance while he did whatever he wanted, sometimes even right in front of her. This is so wrong, because she deserves so much better... Sad
@scorpintensepassion
Others have mentioned it before. I feel that she might be conflicted inward. So I am not sure if she would answer it honestly. I fear that she might go directly on the attack, and I have no intention of angering the Scorpio, I care to much for that.
Really that is what I don't understand, a week prior to that we where flirting and she was coy with eye contact but when I caught her or she caught me, we would lock and share heart felt gestures and subtle communication while in the conversation of others. She actually was by my side after that the whole evening, even when we left, she still drew me out to her side so that we could talk and I could say good bye to her properly, they way I ,and I believe she likes. Always close and in each others personal space, sensual words and sensual touches around her middle, or on her lower back etc. And yes for a good deal of 6 months I have always treated her like this, I want her to know she is attractive, and special, and I care more than a friend or little boy could. A true gentleman won't treat you like crap.
Thanks for your help, I will try and calm my emotions and wait her out. Hopefully she opens up to me and I can get back the amazing real angel I have fallen for over the past 10 months. You Scorps are really our completion smile
Hahaha, kinda confuses me as well, but maybe this round I should just wait a second longer than usual. Tongue Then play a hand of show it all... Winking
Personally, I think you should ask her straight up what's going on. Sometimes us Scorps need to be cornered and called out on our sh*t. It makes us deal with the situation, and we're all about uncovering truth in ourselves, as well as others.
When someone is brave enough to talk to me about things I've been doing, it lets me know they care enough to notice, aren't stupid or easily manipulated, and that I can't walk all over them. I have more respect for them, even if it may piss me off in the moment. It forces me to put my big-girl panties on and deal with the situation like the adult that I am. I know she's younger, but she might need that.
You don't have to be confrontational about it...you can just say, "I've notice you've been acting distant towards me, giving me the cold shoulder, and sometimes can't even look me in the eye. What's going on? I'd prefer you talk to me about things rather than shutting me out, because I don't feel I've done anything to deserve that."
Trust me, she knows how she's acting towards you. Hence, why she will occasionally go back to being her nice self...because she feels guilty for giving you the cold treatment when you don't deserve it. I think she's trying to shut you out because she's not ready for what you want, or she just doesn't want it with you.
Hmm, ok. I get it. Like, while she is growing through all of this she needs to understand action and consequence. And I like the approach you are mentioning. I'll consider that. smile Thanks!
Hey guys. So, it is so good to have friends that really care, I have heard some bad news, kind of. In a nutshell, she has now admitted to a few of our friends that she is losing grip on her life and a few of our friends as well as her family are all over her because of this. Just say, she had a very bad weekend, and bad decisions. Likely nothing to serious but it still worries me.
Anyway, she is apparently now looking for me, and I have been advised by our friends to first back off while they shake things up a bit and make her see what she is doing to us and what we all are doing for her. So I guess, I have darn good friends and should listen to them. I am still worried, but nothing I can do, I just hope she doesn't do stupid stuff, since things can quickly outrun you and then you live with consequences, which I do not wish for her, or anyone.
Thanks community, I have already learnt a lot about her and a bit about my self. One question though. This does point to immaturity, which we all undergo. How should I guy like me approach a Scorpio that is acting out immature? I know what is coming next, cause I know our friends Tongue, but I have heard a few times about immature Scorpios, how do you/have you handled this?
Hi everyone. Update Tongue
Well, since my last post things have changed a bit but I don't know if it is for the better or not, still confused. Last time I mentioned that she had gone on a rather rough weekend and basically some of our mutual friends and her own family got in on the 'action' to try and put her straight.
Tuesday 2 weeks ago I called her, before her rough weekend and she didn't answer. I left a voice message and just let it be. Then last week Tuesday I called her and when she didn't answer, left a voice message and when I put down the phone I though, f! this. !0 months of being there, standing by her, helping her out with finding a new job etc. and this is what I get? Not 2min later she calls me back and tells me sorry but she had fallen asleep on the couch and was tired after the weekend and the 2 days work. So we started chatting again, and it really felt like everything was ok again. So before we hung up, I invited her to come with me and some close friends to a BBQ today. Basically trying to 'book' her a week in advance. Now I know how this could play out but I still decide to go this route. Scorpios can test people, then so can we...
She agreed without hesitation. So to me this was a good sign, but as I know how life works the test is in actually pitching up on an invite. The thing is, I want her to be part of a more select group of friends I have. I am pretty sure she is not use to it, but I still want her there. I just think she will see how sweet life really is when she can get to know them better and see what our friendship means to us.
So, on Friday I call her up, and she is on the road on her way back home for the weekend. Now I know that from her previous weekend her parents where not impressed with her at all (She actually told me what happened and although I don't like it I made it kinda clear that this isn't how/what you do in life and that she should really start taking care of her self better. Even her father told her to start sorting out her life and she respects him so so much, so that must have struck a cord.)
While talking I mentioned the BBQ again and suddenly she starts dancing around the subject with other 'arrangements' etc. So, I would be lying if I said I didn't expect this. Everything was fine, like the previous call but she sounded demoralized and hesitant.
I told her straight up, 'Look if I see you I see you, if I don't, then whatever' and she replied saying she will let me know because it would be great.
I left her the weekend. Today (we had a public holiday) was the BBQ, so this morning I called her to confirm everything, and she was like, 'yes sure etc.' then I told her at what time, and immediately she tried to back out again. lol Again, not surprised. Again I told her, if you'r there great because I would like to see you and I would like you there, if you'r not then I don't care. Again she said as soon as she finishes up, she will let me know. And I though, yeah ok whatever.
The BBQ started at 13:30. By 16:30 I hadn't heard anything and my friends where all like 'forget it bud this is just a game and she is messing with you' so I left it at that, again thinking I don't need this no matter how much I care.
18:22, she calls me... But I was in the kitchen preparing food and didn't hear the phone. When I got to my phone 5 min later I saw she called, and called back. No answer. 1min later she calls and we start talking and I ask her about her day etc. Then she asks me about the BBQ and I told her, we are all still visiting and that she should come over. lol Then I got silence, like I could hear her think. Then she said, yes she'll be there. Again I also said, if your to tired, that is ok then maybe another time, else she is more than welcome and she agreed.
So about 30min later she arrives and I go out to open up for her. Now I haven't seen her in 2.5 weeks. I won't lie, I miss her a lot, and I think about her a lot, so I was so glad to see her, and she was quite happy her self. But this is where it gets interesting and confusing as hell. The last time we spoke she avoided me and eye contact like the plague. It was still very subtle but she was more 'open' again. She would actually talk directly to me and look at me, having only slight hints of wanting to 'pull' away but she resists and doesn't. As a matter of fact she agreed to pretty much all of my suggestions and I could move in right beside her and gently caress her with no resistance. Then, she starts saying things again which totally contradicts her actions. Instead of now reacting on this, I just walk away, and 2 of my friends join me. Both asking me what that was all about. Anyway, this goes on for about 45mins. Then we all decide to pack up to go home. Again, she drops a few things and I figure, go on, do what you want I don't care.
And it is like she just picks up on this and her attitude changes. I greet her in the driveway, and just go on like whatever. But she just stands there. I walk past her twice, and she doesn't budge. One of my close friends talks to her for a bit until her husband asks her to help him out, and still my Scorpio interest just stands there.
When I pass her again, she starts a random conversation and we talk a bit. Then once done, I greet her again, but this time like I always do, gentle caressing her and telling her I will talk to her soon. Then she gets in the car to leave.
Now I am no mind reader so I am confused by her actions because she openly contradicts her self in front of me and others. The min I walk away she changes the subject to get my attention. I do love her so so much, and I really want her in my life, because I feel she does complete me and I know what she has been through recently and I know I can help her and be her other half. I just feel that at the same time, if she blows hot and cold and acts in a way that I don't like or agree with I have the right to not acknowledge that and also currently feel that unfavourable behaviour and actions should not be motivated, because it hurts me and makes everyone uncomfortable. Now I don't believe in ultimatums, but they way I reacted today actually showed her understanding of how it makes me feel. Another one of our friends has recently cut off communication with her because of what she does. Now according to her she believes that she did nothing wrong, but I have talked to our other friend and she told me she thinks my Scorpio interest is a spoiled brat and nobody deserves to be treated the way she treats people. This is also the last of our friends that still wants to 'chat' with her. So that is still going to be interesting as she comes out guns blazing straight down the barrel and the Scorpio girl, well she trusts her for millions of reasons.
Anyway, I also realized while replying to another topic on here, that a lot of things have changed recently. She doesn't even say thank you or that she appreciates what I do for her any more. And yet this evening I saw a part of the girl I love so much, hidden behind something else. Like a shadow, a veil of sorts. She is acting out in a particular way, as if unsure and sure at the same time. Is this part of growth, or what could be going on?
I am happy that I saw her, and overall she wasn't hostile like before, as a matter of fact she actually showed a different side. Like a softer, vulnerable side that I believe only I could see, but also only after she noted how I react against her unnecessary comments and behaviour.
Despite all this, I just can't think of cutting her off. She really is the one I would move mountains for even she only asks me to do so 1000 years from now. I am willingly that patient, which also scare the crap out of me hahaha Because I have never been this calm in my whole life, and it is definitely the 'Scorpio effect'

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