The Cancer ex has a new boyfriend (Page 2)

She split from him already? My advice would be to stay away. I know Cancers pretty well and they like to recycle exes due to the whole "never throwing away" things for good. And don't get all upset Cancer people because you know it's true. She will probably need some reassurance or looking for a shoulder to cry on and honestly I would vanish. I would be like excuse me you are coming to me about your lost love? Uh how tacky! Keep us posted. I'll be honest though I am almost annoyed with this girl, scratch that I am annoyed. Cancers I love them but they just really piss me off when it comes to relationships.

Hey I do! I am a Gemini and yeah everyone will hear my friggin' 2 cents ok?! Gaw! For real though come on. Having an ex come to you because her/his new flavor of the month didn't work out? Shit. Better keep on walking. Id be like hey I don't care. Did you care when you left me? Nope. So there is the door. Use it.

Let*It*Be - I am being very cautious, she knows how I feel. I still hold her dearly, but this is where the head must rule, not the heart.

Also, for the record...she hasn't 'came crawling back' to me it's not like that at all.
Believe me, cautious is a word I know all to well. Nothing is certain, I'm trying to get over her still and she is just out of a different relationship. Cue all the 'name calling' but I know her.
With all due respect none of you do, that may sound ungrateful and rude! But it's not meant to be! I appriciate all the responses and believe me I do! Thank you. Maybe this is where the emotional attachment rules over the cyber assistance?

She has literally just split from this guy and that is all that had happened. No one is talking about anything else. I still need 'me time'
🙂

*squints* Um hum. Give it time. She will. Cancers always do (no offense to any moon children here). I'm calling it now, and I don't mean to be rude either but that whole "You don't know them like I know them" doesn't change the fact that she did what she did. We are going purely on what you tell us, simple as that. I understand it is not meant to be rude but you are doing it in a verbally engineered way. Kudos for that seeing you know how us Gemini's do things.

Posted by Xin
She split from him already? My advice would be to stay away. I know Cancers pretty well and they like to recycle exes due to the whole "never throwing away" things for good. And don't get all upset Cancer people because you know it's true. She will probably need some reassurance or looking for a shoulder to cry on and honestly I would vanish. I would be like excuse me you are coming to me about your lost love? Uh how tacky! Keep us posted. I'll be honest though I am almost annoyed with this girl, scratch that I am annoyed. Cancers I love them but they just really piss me off when it comes to relationships.

WRONG! Cancers don't recycle exes we just can't let go, even if it's bad for us. Dealing with and ex is comfortable, we know them, we remember the good times and ignore the parts that made us miserable. Finding something new is scary. A potential partner will need to be able to see if the feelings are real or if she/he are just having a problem moving on. It's possible she needs Mr.Scorp to help her move on. He needs to be the one to completley end it, then she will be okay.

Posted by MrScorp
Let*It*Be - I am being very cautious, she knows how I feel. I still hold her dearly, but this is where the head must rule, not the heart.

Also, for the record...she hasn't 'came crawling back' to me it's not like that at all.
Believe me, cautious is a word I know all to well. Nothing is certain, I'm trying to get over her still and she is just out of a different relationship. Cue all the 'name calling' but I know her.
With all due respect none of you do, that may sound ungrateful and rude! But it's not meant to be! I appriciate all the responses and believe me I do! Thank you. Maybe this is where the emotional attachment rules over the cyber assistance?

She has literally just split from this guy and that is all that had happened. No one is talking about anything else. I still need 'me time'
🙂

Only time will tell what is meant for you two. Don't try to force it either way. Both of your are sorting through this. Good luck to you.

Recycling, not letting go to me it's the same crap. The fact that you would even consider holding onto something and living in a fantasy world is just lying to yourself. You know them which makes it easier to just sit there and count all the good things (even if it was only two major incidents and ignore the rest) and pretend that hey maybe one day we will work out.

Look I hate to be the realist here (yes I know there is a fine line between being one and being a pessimist) but exes are exes for A REASON. People don't change normally, even if some catastrophic event happens people still don't have an epiphany like "Wow I should have been nice to them" or "Well I guess I made the wrong decision about x, y, z..." That is giving humanity WAY too much credit. Now granted some people do have these major events happen and do a complete U turn and go the other direction. But most people don't.

Yep I am the big bad wolf here and you know what I don't care. I understand he is having trouble letting go but good god what is with some people and holding on to things that never worked? Am I the only one who severs ties and does it ruthlessly? I should have been born a Scorpio (the ACTUAL definition of one) not the emotional ones who are pansies but the super ruthless put you to the test ones.

HUMPH.

Posted by LunarMaiden

Posted by MrScorp
Let*It*Be - I am being very cautious, she knows how I feel. I still hold her dearly, but this is where the head must rule, not the heart.

Also, for the record...she hasn't 'came crawling back' to me it's not like that at all.
Believe me, cautious is a word I know all to well. Nothing is certain, I'm trying to get over her still and she is just out of a different relationship. Cue all the 'name calling' but I know her.
With all due respect none of you do, that may sound ungrateful and rude! But it's not meant to be! I appriciate all the responses and believe me I do! Thank you. Maybe this is where the emotional attachment rules over the cyber assistance?

She has literally just split from this guy and that is all that had happened. No one is talking about anything else. I still need 'me time'
🙂

Only time will tell what is meant for you two. Don't try to force it either way. Both of your are sorting through this. Good luck to you.

click to expand

It will, i'm just going to look after myself for a while now. She knows exactly how i feel, we do both still care a lot about each other. The bond and connection between a Cancer and a Scorpio i think is something truly special and that won't ever go away, but everything is so messed up right now, that some time for individual TLC is what's best now.
This is the reason for my anger towards the new relationship because i knew it wasn't what she needed.
I understand why she ended things and no it wasn't for the new guy, to any doubters.
Sorry again, yes i am loyal and protective but i am also understanding and know the truth when i see it.

She did end things at the end of the day, so that's still profound in my mind. What we had is in the past now, i am my own person and need to keep establishing that, maybe that will help me keep my identity in future relationships!

Posted by Xin
Recycling, not letting go to me it's the same crap. The fact that you would even consider holding onto something and living in a fantasy world is just lying to yourself. You know them which makes it easier to just sit there and count all the good things (even if it was only two major incidents and ignore the rest) and pretend that hey maybe one day we will work out.

Look I hate to be the realist here (yes I know there is a fine line between being one and being a pessimist) but exes are exes for A REASON. People don't change normally, even if some catastrophic event happens people still don't have an epiphany like "Wow I should have been nice to them" or "Well I guess I made the wrong decision about x, y, z..." That is giving humanity WAY too much credit. Now granted some people do have these major events happen and do a complete U turn and go the other direction. But most people don't.

Yep I am the big bad wolf here and you know what I don't care. I understand he is having trouble letting go but good god what is with some people and holding on to things that never worked? Am I the only one who severs ties and does it ruthlessly? I should have been born a Scorpio (the ACTUAL definition of one) not the emotional ones who are pansies but the super ruthless put you to the test ones.

HUMPH.

Haha. My brother is a Gemini and i know all about the "Go and do one, i never want to see you again"
I guess water signs are more compassionate and I don't think Gemini's are as emotional, where as water signs seem to be very emotional.

Things are difficult to let go of, yes i hold her dear because she was someone who was actually worth an ounce of my time!
I also understand that people make mistakes, and to just cast someone off as a 'failure' or a whole relationship as a 'failure' could be seen as out of touch.

I'm not going to carelessly dive back into any relationship because of this "emotional connection" that gets a battering from more critical, black and white sings.
When i hurt, i hurt! They say Scorpio hurt is deep and it really digs in, i can back this up! So do people think i want to put that at risk again?!

Any decision i make regarding relationships if made after extensive deliberation, everyone must pass a 'test' in order to gain my time, trust or love.

Hum....

I read your retort and I agree. Gemini's are absolutely less emotional. The "go and do one" yeah but more or less I just don't put a lot into it seeing if you are not worth it (which I make my mind up about you pretty quickly). Emotions? I guess I see it as a weakness and I am careful who I trust and who I hang around with. Normally I don't give a rats ass.

I'm having a hard time figuring Scorpio's out myself so when you posted this my mind was like "What the hell is going on here?" Figured it would have been a terrible burning rant from all nine levels of hell. But I was wrong.

Xin - I think this is where the 'misunderstood' opinion of Scorpio's comes to light.

We hurt, we feel, we care and we amoungst all things LOVE! Once someone is in our hearts they will have one hell of a fight on if they want to get out!
The sheer hatred that runs through my veins when the buttons are pushed is also quite immense though yes.

A world of extremes eh!

Yeah totally extreme. I call my Scorpio a robot and he get's upset with me cause hey it's true! He will retreat (not now but this is before) and just hand out in his dark den and brood. He broke up with me several times yet he was like "Oh I never stopped thinking of you" yeah ugh huh. Whatever! I suppose I don't really understand Scorpio's and I believe there is definitely misconceptions about them.

Xin - Yeah, hugely! Sucks for us too!

It seems rare to find someone who understands me, then again i am only 24 and not that experienced. Yet my judgement is normally pretty sound. I feel like i have lived a whole lifetime already, such is my apparent knowledge of relationships, life and general day to day experiences! It's wierd! lol

So...(getting back to the point) My ex, yes my ex, black and white as that perhaps! Is someone i love, she is one of the great loves of my life which makes parting from her very hard.

It's all about time. Time, time and more time. Time will tell. If its meant to be its meant to be, but as i say i am being very cautious now.
This thread needs a new title!

Just to keep this updated, i feel like i should let you all who posted that we are talking again. Everything is cool on this level, but i am pretty sure that she wants me back.
Alarm bells started ringing when i got this feeling, but i am trying to be cool and actually take my time here.
Yes, she is really, really stunning and i am a sucker for looks. But i also realise that looks aren't the emotional bond that i crave, here's the absolute head "treetrunk" we did have that, throughout our relationship. She was the one who called it off because she was bored, we didn't do any new things anymore and it pretty much stopped in it's tracks with regards to moving forward with life. In my eyes, that is understandable and i respect her for doing it in a way, but i just don't know if we would go round in circles or is the trust has now gone.

Sometimes i wander why i wan't a relationship so much!

And.....relax. 🙂

Called it! Yeah points for me! Go me go me! 🙂

Haha. Well...to be honest, she always said i was 'the best boyfriend she ever had' and i was left feeling confused that she wanted to end it. She has called herself an 'idiot' since, which i later found out.

In a way, i feel kind of annoyed because i know she hates to be on her own, so it seems like it's a...'well, he was the best one so i'll be with him' attitude.
I don't want to get back into something that has a limited time span, yes i know nothing lasts forever but you know what i mean!

Actualy...I don't know why i posted an update on this because i'm already done with talking about it! lol

Do I get some kind of prize for calling it? 🙂
Yes I know I am being a jackass but Cancer's are pretty predictable. I am surrounded by them so I would like to say I have my badge in Canceryness!

No, you just get your own personal glory? lol

I just don't want to do this for the nostalgia or anything like that. If there's something in there that is worth saving then yes i would be interested but otherwise, i'd rather save myself the pain again.

Believe me, we have experienced the Scorp/Cancer thing and it is quite magical, but sometimes i wander if i am too 'strong' a personality for her.
I think i am very much a stereotypical Scorp on a lot of things, one of them is my disgust for 'drunk, sloppy behaviour' it repulses me to be honest. People in control is a turn on, and when the girl in question has been drunk, she has picked up on the way i am. It's probably the eyes that are the give away, but yes this is a negative for 'us'

Sometimes i do feel i need to relax! When girls i like behave like this it makes me feel like an old man who is 'disgusted with the youth of today'
I can't help it though and i am 24! More like 24 going on 94!

Mmm I see. I think that is why the Scorpio that is giving me so much trouble liked me in the first place. But I think we fight for the driver's seat more often than not. I am in control and so is he and we fight like crazy for it. Anyways, you definitely don't want to do it for the nostalgia but that is what Cancer dreams about, and lives in that comfy area.

To some exstent i do too. My faith in people is pretty useless, i am judgemental, i can't help it. I think it's my security barrier coming up! Also it's a risky business going after someone new, plus...i am secretive, so getting to know new people is pretty much impossible sometimes!
With her, i know what to expect and know she is a good person. She just has issues with the 'mundane life' she wants more excitement and to go and see places and do things. I'm not saying i dont, it's just not realistic to do all of these things when we did want to buy a house!

You can't have your cake and eat it, as they say!

I'm a Cancer and was with a Scorp for awhile.

I ended it, cause yeah... I got bored.

I've NEVER gone backwards in a relationship. Ya, I may pine for an ex but it's the fantasy part of the relationship I miss, not the reality.

I met up with my ex Scorpio years later and he pursued ME, big time. So I did entertain going back with him because that Cancer/Scorp thing is pretty intense.
He just wanted to get back with me to turn around and be the dumpee because his ego couldn't handle the fact I was the one who ended it.

Sounds like this story is going the same way...

Hmm...No, I can't say that i want to be the 'dumper' I'd rather not waste my time if that is all i intend!

What exactly is she bored about? Is this a money issue? Remember she's a Cardinal sign which means she needs action every now and then. We don't like to just talk about what we are going to do, at some point we need those thoughts to become a reality. Cancers love to travel and meet people.

But we do need someone to GENTLY remind us that we have bills to pay and a house to save up for. So I understand you putting your foot down and saying lets stay focused. Sounds like there needs to be a balance. Like instead of a trip to Switzerland; a drive upstate. I know that's a big difference as Switzerland is beautiful. Going somewhere with the one we love will be accepted. But we never forget that someday Switzerland is on the list. Remember, Cancer's love to fantasize about luxury and expensive trips, even if we don't have a pot to piss in.

Posted by shellshocker
I'm a Cancer and was with a Scorp for awhile.

I ended it, cause yeah... I got bored.

I've NEVER gone backwards in a relationship. Ya, I may pine for an ex but it's the fantasy part of the relationship I miss, not the reality.

I met up with my ex Scorpio years later and he pursued ME, big time. So I did entertain going back with him because that Cancer/Scorp thing is pretty intense.
He just wanted to get back with me to turn around and be the dumpee because his ego couldn't handle the fact I was the one who ended it.

Sounds like this story is going the same way...

A lot of people do this, not just Scorpios.

This was my initial thoughts as he pined for her but then when she came back, now he's hesitant. LOL I think when it's all said and done, the true direction of this relationship will be established.

Posted by LunarMaiden
What exactly is she bored about? Is this a money issue? Remember she's a Cardinal sign which means she needs action every now and then. We don't like to just talk about what we are going to do, at some point we need those thoughts to become a reality. Cancers love to travel and meet people.

But we do need someone to GENTLY remind us that we have bills to pay and a house to save up for. So I understand you putting your foot down and saying lets stay focused. Sounds like there needs to be a balance. Like instead of a trip to Switzerland; a drive upstate. I know that's a big difference as Switzerland is beautiful. Going somewhere with the one we love will be accepted. But we never forget that someday Switzerland is on the list. Remember, Cancer's love to fantasize about luxury and expensive trips, even if we don't have a pot to piss in.

Hey!

No, it wasn't a money thing. She is more of a 'go getter' than me which i think is fine, we are also both introverts which is good and bad, but it seems like she wants to do all of these things but needs me to 'make it happen' or be assertive and go and do it! There her goals/dreams/ideas/passions and i have always said i support whatever decision you choose to make, aslong as it's not life threatening or financially fatal! It's odd. I don't think she can put her finger on it, let alone me, but i do have a good understanding of it.

She got bored i think because i seemed happy to just plod along in life. I don't like my job for example, and i'd been saying that since we first got together (over 2 years) and yet i am still in this same job.
This is where we do clash...My reason for not changing is the utterly perplexing and almost soul destroying fact that i jave no idea what i want to do! My job at the moment is just that...'a job' i go, i work, i get paid, i go home.
I want to care about my job, be passionate about it and be the best at it, but i just don't know what i want to do!
This is also an area where i would like some more support from her, she just told me to search until i find one that sparks even a slight interest and then apply. Fair enough, but the doesn't understand me properly. This is what i am basically trying to say... I am a 'scanner' apparently. http://getmotivation.com/articlelib/articles/barbara_sher_scanner.html<BR>
She takes my lack of motivation as a 'not going anywhere' si

Posted by MrScorp
Hmm...No, I can't say that i want to be the 'dumper' I'd rather not waste my time if that is all i intend!

Do you think my ex Scorpio would "consciously" admit to doing that? no way! but I know him...

I'm also aware of Scorpio nature. It's a power/revenge kinda thing.

One of my girls was 'seeing' a guy. After a couple weeks of hanging out she's ready to sex this guy and her intuition went OFF, when after the deed he was up and out the door.
She got suspicious and crazy when he disappeared and rarely responded to her. After some intense detective work, of course she finds out he has a woman. She tries really hard to play it off... for about 3 days.

We're all out and this guy comes in with his woman. All bold like too., knowing my girl is going to be there. She was pacing and skeeming all night (what a show!) and finally corners this guy's woman in the bathroom. She even gives the girlfriend her number! There's fighting and drama... and phone calls etc. etc. I'm leaving so much out but i'm getting off topic..

My point is, the whole time she was trying to convince us, but mostly herself, that she was doing all this to 'help' the girlfriend get herself out of an abusive relationship. She couldn't care less that this guy screwed her over, it was her kind and generous nature that lead her to try and find this guy's girlfriend an apartment! Ya, right... pretty transparent.

I know that any sign can convince themselves of things... but Scorpios are really good at it