Confused...

Posted by cutiebullie
There was a point in my life when i was not ready for anything serious and only wanted fun fun fun with no strings attached, however i still got burned in the end. Realized, i'd rather not sell myself short. I confused myself from the difference of keeping my long term values intact in exchange of instant pleasures. Would like to keep myself back on track and won't play the fire again. Afterall, the rewards can be so sweet when taking things seriously and in the right manner.

I hear ya. I've always had serious relationships and always thought I would not want a relationship without commitment. But this guy really turns me on, just his personality alone does it for me, there's something so hot about him. He's the kind of guy that I can have fun with without getting heavy with him. It's such a lusty thing with him, I feel lusty when I see him or hear from him. I don't want to fall in love with him, just fall in bed with him will be fine LOL. There is no way I could fall for him, but I do feel that I could have some good times with him without attaching emotionally to him. Passion and friendship, we both want that and none of that I want to marry you etc.

Posted by cutiebullie

Posted by DaBull

Posted by cutiebullie
There was a point in my life when i was not ready for anything serious and only wanted fun fun fun with no strings attached, however i still got burned in the end. Realized, i'd rather not sell myself short. I confused myself from the difference of keeping my long term values intact in exchange of instant pleasures. Would like to keep myself back on track and won't play the fire again. Afterall, the rewards can be so sweet when taking things seriously and in the right manner.

I hear ya. I've always had serious relationships and always thought I would not want a relationship without commitment. But this guy really turns me on, just his personality alone does it for me, there's something so hot about him. He's the kind of guy that I can have fun with without getting heavy with him. It's such a lusty thing with him, I feel lusty when I see him or hear from him. I don't want to fall in love with him, just fall in bed with him will be fine LOL. There is no way I could fall for him, but I do feel that I could have some good times with him without attaching emotionally to him. Passion and friendship, we both want that and none of that I want to marry you etc.

So what's confusing when you already made a choice what you are up to?

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I am in two minds, is that my gemini venus to blame :s LOL
I think it's the fact that I will have to get physical more quicker than I have done in the past and I am just wondering how to just enjoy that rush rush feeling of it.

Posted by Eleni
u have an aqua moon? awesome!

then u know how easily we feel trapped in...well...overly intense relationships :/

just go with the flow...stop feeling so nervous and enjoy it for what it is...the only problem I guess is if one of u unexpectedly falls in lov...i mean, these pesky complications cant be predicted sometimes, ya know?

and I'm sensing he likes u more than he's letting on..so u really have to be slightly careful here

Plus...check his chart...make sure he doesn't have a water moon or his moon in a water house, cuz he??ll most likely get all emotional with u..

oh, also check his eros sign cuz if it's in a water sign..fuggedabout sex with no deep feelings...he??ll start getting hooked with every roll in the hay 🙂

I don't think he will fall in love, he's never been in love with any girls he's dated etc. And he sounds pretty confident about just wanting to chill and get physical, and not wanting more than that. I haven't really been making any efforts in contacting him, I would have thought that he would assume I am not interested after not answering his calls a few times or even texting him, but he seems pretty keen on getting involved.
I am not sure when his birthday is, he told me ages ago and I have forgotten, but I'll find out soon. He's very mysterious and doesn't get personal. He is definately a gentleman offering to massage my head and shoulders when I am stressed out or been working a lot.

Posted by Eleni
i'm assuming u know urself well enough to decide whether u can handle sex with no commitment...if not, check ur chart too lol 😛

For me it's about doing it with the right person that can make me feel good in their company and in bed. I'm quite passionate so would prefer similar guy who is passionate and firey in bed. Because to me it's not just a sex act, it's something more than that, nothing to do with love or anything, but kind of like having sex as if we are in love. And when it's time to say goodbye it's not bitter at all like how it would be with serious relationships. It would be a happy goodbye as if to say wow it was an amazing love affair, if that makes sense.

daBull —

Ok, this is a difficult one because in my opinion and experience with dealing with my girlfriends who are UBER needy, etc, this type of relationship is just a losing proposition for them! BUT, with that being said, only YOU know what is in your heart, mind and soul, and if you are being honest with yourself and feel that you can just "chill" and just "be" with him while reaping the errr, ummm, benefits...then go for it.

With ALL of that being said, I agree with Eleni in that you should just go with the flow. None of my girlfriends (barring my Leo gf) has the capability of just "going with the flow." Once they get "fleshy" with someone, then it's -- China Patterns, changing their last name, and picking out wedding destinations and baby names! I think there is a lot to be said for just doing what comes natural. If the natural progression is for you to get into a serious relationship with this gentleman, than honey, there isn't anything either of you could do to prevent it, because what will be will be!

One of my friends met this old man when she was showing him a house (she's in real estate). He asked her if she was married, and she was like, "Hell no!" He said, "Good, and if you decide to get married, find one that has money and can take care of you, because it's just as easy to fall in love with a rich man as a poor one, as in the end they all turn into a $ $ holes, but at least you'll have some trinkets & baubles as your consolation prizes!" She laughed (she's a Scorp), but she is of that mindset now too, as she's dated all the "poor nice guys" who still turn out to be jerks in the end!

Posted by Eleni
"He's very mysterious and doesn't get personal"

i smell a scorpio moon LOL 😛

Oooh sexy!!! LOL

It's funny how you mentioned about how someone can fall for someone in these sort of things, we talked for about 2hrs on the phone and he mentioned how you never know we might end up liking eachother more than we expected to. Hmmm....

USC!!!!!!!!!!!!!! GIRLLLLLLLL you spoke like a true BULL- oh how we love our material stuff 🙂
If this guy just said let's have a casual relationship and just have fun and enjoy ourselves, you don't bug me and I don't bug you, basically no passion from him then I don't think I'd be interested. It's the fact that he actually is a sweet caring guy and is willing to treat me exactly the way I would prefer my serious boyfriend to treat me, the only difference is that there's no commitment, just undercover girlfriend/boyfriend thing with nothing official. I like how he even says if ever I need him to be there for me, or I need his help with anything whatever I want he'll be there for me. He's like he's not the type to just do his thing and then no contact til he wants to do his thing again. Today he was like saying how he likes talking to me on the phone and he feels like he could talk to me all day and night. He was saying how he can easily feel care for someone like me and how he wants to treat me like a princess. He's strange but interesting. I wasn't expecting him to say all that, just that he'll treat me well and give me whatever I want. I was hungry while I was on the phone to him and he was like "do you want me to order you some pizza or something, you need to eat beautiful" LOL see what I mean about him being sweet hehe.
You are absolutely right about how I know my mind, heart and soul, if I am being honest with myself then that is what I want. A relationship without commitment and to be treated with all that niceness. He is willing to give me that and I should make the most of it, it's not like he's not getting nothing in return either, I'll treat him well too. And I know deep down when it's time to say bye, I will happily say my goodbye to him, wouldn't even mind remaining friends with him as we do get along pretty well.
So no strings attached with the benefits of being treated amazingly and lots of treats might I add; or a serious relationship with some loser that gives me empty promises and backs out as soon as I give my heart only to just break it in the end....I think you feel me on this one sista 😉

Posted by DaBull
I think you feel me on this one sista 😉

Absolument! 😉
Do you baby girl! You are young, intelligent, beautiful and a kind spirit! You will get everything this wonderful world of an oyster has to offer you! This, I can not guarantee, but I feel in my bones!
I can't wait until I am out there; we are drinkin', eatin' and I'm smoking a stogie (I don't smoke often, but me loves the nice cigars). Gotta go to the Lanesborough Hotel to their Garden Room for a puff!

Oh yes girl can't wait to have some beers with you 😉 I'll join you on the smoking too LOL.
And definately, I am doing me from now on, it's all about loving myself now and get whatever I want, life is too short to be hurting over people who hurt me 🙂 Life is beautiful and I will enjoy all the niceness that comes with it and ditch anything that causes me pain, I cannot allow someone to do that to me hell no girl 🙂

This sounds like what I've been going through the past 2-3 years. Recent events have given me clarity.

There are certain things that I've always wanted and aspired to at a very young age...that I felt deep down that God or the Universe or whatever had ordained for me. And then I met a boy...

I loved him and what I wanted became more about "us" than me. I felt that in order to be with him, I'd have to forego some of my "destiny." At the time I rationalized, "this is what you do for love."

In truth, my soul died.

I loved this person but everything that energizes me, the dreams I aspire to where squashed the moment I gave him my heart.

Recently I met a guy and OMG, he reminded me of what I want out of life...not as a couple, but as an individual. In other words, I get what "completes me" means.

My suggestion would be to go with the guy that reinforces you as an individual.

I think sometimes we mistake general "get along" with life-long pair bonding. Just because you care about someone doesn't mean he's "the one." The guy for me is the dude who helps make my dreams a reality...and vice versa.

I've learned that it's ok to want, what I want and the man for me will help give it to me.

You're missing the point.

One of your dreams could be to have kids. What if the person you're with doesn't want them?

Have them or don't, one of you is changing the future for the other. So finding someone who helps you fulfill your dreams is simple if the dreams are mutual.

Posted by USCTaurusGal

Posted by DaBull
I think you feel me on this one sista 😉

Absolument! 😉
Do you baby girl! You are young, intelligent, beautiful and a kind spirit! You will get everything this wonderful world of an oyster has to offer you! This, I can not guarantee, but I feel in my bones!
I can't wait until I am out there; we are drinkin', eatin' and I'm smoking a stogie (I don't smoke often, but me loves the nice cigars). Gotta go to the Lanesborough Hotel to their Garden Room for a puff!

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DaBull, I so agree with Eleni and USC! If that is where you are right now I say go with the flow as well and be treated like a princess! I am at a similar place as to not wanting anything heavy/serious. I think you should have fun and spread your wings! Especially if you get pretty things along the road...lol.
😉

"Especially if you get pretty things along the road...lol."

Le sigh...the proverbial "icing on the cake" so to speak 😉
Hey, there is nothing wrong with liking/having nice things! I'd rather have one awesome thing that I want than 100 pieces of bullsh#t! But, that's me though. One of my cousins is a Libra, and when we were growing up, she'd NEVER buy anything full price and always hunted for bargains (which is fine, cuz' I love a sell just like the next person), but she would buy a bunch of crap! Give me a phat pair of Gucci/Prada/Christians any day of the week over owning 50 pairs of cheap shoes anyday! Again, that's just me!
I've digressed - GO DaBULLLLLLLLLLLLL. CHARGE!!!!! LOL!

"sell" should have been "sale"
(Grrrr - EDIT BUTTON)

Posted by USCTaurusGal
"Especially if you get pretty things along the road...lol."

Le sigh...the proverbial "icing on the cake" so to speak 😉
Hey, there is nothing wrong with liking/having nice things! I'd rather have one awesome thing that I want than 100 pieces of bullsh#t! But, that's me though. One of my cousins is a Libra, and when we were growing up, she'd NEVER buy anything full price and always hunted for bargains (which is fine, cuz' I love a sell just like the next person), but she would buy a bunch of crap! Give me a phat pair of Gucci/Prada/Christians any day of the week over owning 50 pairs of cheap shoes anyday! Again, that's just me!
I've digressed - GO DaBULLLLLLLLLLLLL. CHARGE!!!!! LOL!

I agree I'm the same, I'd rather have one amazing item than to have lots of little items for that amount, unless of course the little items are good in quality. Bulls don't do cheap unless it's a good cheap lol e.g Gucci/Dior etc sale LOL.

^^^ 🙂 😉 you go girl!