HELP! Taurus male so confusing (long post)

I have fallen for this taurus guy who is 33 and starting his life over. We are both in recovery for alcoholism and have been sober for years. I am 37 and a libra and recently divorced which he knew about. Well he started flirting with me alot around the end of june. I was slow to respond because I was a little shy and told him so. We met up and hung out at a park about the end of july. He then told me that he was broke, starting over, working 60 hours a week, saving for a car, etc. I pretty much listened. I have a nice home an expensive car and do ok financially, so I was quiet because I needed to check him out too and not intimidate him. By the end of the evening he asked me if I was looking for casual dating or a relationship. I didn't think and immediately said I'm not interested in casual sex, I'm looking for a relationship that will lead to marriage and a family. He was quiet but I got the impression that he liked my answer.

He would say hello and hug me at the recovery meetings but I would be somewhat uncomfortable because I don't want others gossiping. So about a week later I called him after not hearing from him and asked if he wanted to hang out and he said he'd call me back. He didn't call or text me back. He would still smile at me and hug me periodically but didn't call or text. Then he texted about 2 weeks later asking to see me later that day. (This was in august). We met up and he talked about how tired he was and how stressful work was, how he needed to get his driver's license back and pay the courts and get a car now, etc. I still mostly listened.

So we met a total of 4 times (about once a month). He has never really asked me out officially but I was ok with that because I knew he was saving for a car and paying off court fees. In september I told him I wanted to know were we stood. I told him that I was looking for a relationship and a partner to build a business with and he told me he wasn't able to be in a relationship. I was disappointed but told him that I still liked him alot. We kissed and stuff that night and he told me that he didn't want to hurt me. I told him that I'm a big girl and I'll be alright.

Well I ended up having sex with him in October at my home (on the 4th meeting) and I thought it was great and after we talked. He told me how sick his mom was for the past two weeks on a breathing machine for fluid in her lungs and how busy he was.

Well I ended up having sex with him in October at my home (on the 4th meeting) and I thought it was great and after we talked. He told me how sick his mom was for the past two weeks on a breathing machine for fluid in her lungs and how busy he was. He told me that she was scared of dying alone so he visits the hospital everyday. He seemed really comfortable and satisfied. It felt right.

I've seen him at 4 recovery meetings since and he makes sure he smiles at me, but hasn't hugged me. I have only received 2 texts from him since we had sex and for some reason I thought he'd at least find time to see me again. I texted him that I missed him and he said he was sorry and that his mom was home and keeping him busy. I haven't heard anything else from him.

I heard that his mom just had heart surgery 10 days ago and so I sent him a couple of texts of encouragement and let him know that I'd be there if he needed to talk. No response from him. I ran into him about 5 days ago and gave him a hug and told him to have faith and he gave me a wonderful hug but I couldn't help wondering if he was just being nice to me, not wanting to hurt my feelings because we're in recovery.


Well I am totally frustrated because he doesn't call me or text me at all. I really like him alot and have never had any guy act like this because I'm so used to them fawning over me. So now I'm thinking he's either too stressed with work and his mom or just not interested.

So last night I texted him "will I see you intimately again or was that it & we're moving on to other pastures?"

I need advice. Did I just satisfy his sexual curiosity and we're done or should I give him some time due to his mom and work? Am I being selfish and unreasonable expecting a call or text at this time?

"I told him that I was looking for a relationship and a partner to build a business with and he told me he wasn't able to be in a relationship. I was disappointed but told him that I still liked him alot. We kissed and stuff that night and he told me that he didn't want to hurt me. I told him that I'm a big girl and I'll be alright."

i don't understand why ur so confused. this ^^ says it all.

i think ur just needing attention and affection from recently enduring a divorce. i would just let this be and work on urself for a while. try being completely happy with urself, sync up head and heart, then go for a relationship.

Posted by ninjamu
"I told him that I was looking for a relationship and a partner to build a business with and he told me he wasn't able to be in a relationship. I was disappointed but told him that I still liked him alot. We kissed and stuff that night and he told me that he didn't want to hurt me. I told him that I'm a big girl and I'll be alright."

i don't understand why ur so confused. this ^^ says it all.

i think ur just needing attention and affection from recently enduring a divorce. i would just let this be and work on urself for a while. try being completely happy with urself, sync up head and heart, then go for a relationship.

I really can't add anymore than these ladies have; he told you the truth...you weren't honest with yourself. You sound like a great lady (btw, congrats on your sobriety, I have some friends in AA, and I know it's a challenge, so you should feel proud of your HUGE accomplishment!)

Yeah, all of you are right. I've never fallen for a guy first and I didn't expect to like him so much. I had been separated for 3 years and hadn't dated in over a year. So I will give myself more time to work on me.

Thanks for the advice

It's ok. We have ALL been there before 🙂 Just work on being the most fantabulous person that you can be, and when the timing is right, you will met up with a man who is deserving of you, and most importantly he will WANT to be there with you!
Remember, most men are VERY simplistic...they say what they mean, and they mean what they say.

OY - "met" should have been "meet".