he's killlllllllllling me!!!

This topic was created in the Taurus forum by xoxo on Thursday, January 28, 2010 and has 7 replies.
Aqua female here....with my sights set on a Taurus male. I'm gonna try and make this short and sweet....
I've known Mr.Taurus for about 2 years. We've been friends that had a very flirty relationship. He is known as quite the ladies man and I think I've always been a lil hesitant to get involved. Well, here we are 2 years later and it's safe to say I'm involved. It's funny because I've always had the upper hand with this man. I can't even tell you the number of times I snubbed him as well as broke plans with him. He never really gave up on me though...he kept trying and eventually he got under my skin. I decided to go home with him the night before he was leaving on a big trip for a month. How very aqaurius of me right? So he gets back and we've been involved in this FWB type of relationship going on 2 months now.
I've been confused because I can't tell how i should play my cards. He seems like hes not putting forth much effort....I'm a very prideful person and if a man is not interested in me ill bounce. He does a lot of teasing and is very indirect. Almost as if he expects me to invite myself over? Maybe thats what hes used to? like for example, I texted him today asking when were going to hang out and he says "the sooner the better!" What does this mean! He's not that interested and letting me down gently orrrr he wants me to push the issue even further and suggest a time?....ummm that its not really in my nature. I'm used to the man chasing me....What do you guys think?
so you shut him down for two years and now you're questioning why he's not being aggressive? lol
taurus are definitely slow learners but once we learn, it's really hard for us to reverse course. it doesn't mean a relationship isn't on his mind but if you're saying he put forth effort in the past and was spurned by you, it might be a good idea for you to do a lil chasing of your own. don't go overboard with it because we like to chase too but we do so with the assumption that we can eventually catch our prey. remind he that you're winnable, be direct and bit demanding and who knows...you may get the bull to stop grazing and take some action.
In order to have something different....one must try something different. So here I go....
I've been mindfukced by many guys....im pretty scared to put myself out there and i have a very big fear of rejection. But At least I'll be able to say i tried.
I've def been chasing after this taurus.....it's just not in my nature to be pushy. Seems like I'm gonna have to be the one that "seals the deal" though....he's been doing alot of carrot dangeling and im scared to be one of those "too nice" girls that makes herself too available. Maybe he liked the old me better....maybe he likes the challenge just as much as me?
I hate that ive been analyzing this situation so much....wish i could just go with it and worry about the after effects later but i really dont want to go thru another heartbreak.....
I feel like we dont understand eachother. Maybe a talk needs to happen or something? but im not too good with those...
hmm...i dunno. men are weird so i can tell you how it's for me as a taurus woman but not sure how a taurus man would handle the same situation.
yes, we do like to chase. it's fun in the short-term and in the long-term, it's about justifying the effort we've put into winning this person's heart. eventually however we wisen up and if we haven't caught you by the time we've become enlightened, chances are, no matter how we feel for/about you, it's difficult for us to recapture our initial lust.
i have an aquarius-ex that i could probably get back in a heart-beat if i wanted to. thing is, as much as i think we'd be really good together, i don't want to be with him. i spent so much time trying to make it work that it was/is kinda insulting that after i've chosen to give up, after he demoralized me so many times (or snubbed as you put it), that now...NOW he wants to date me? what did he break up with me in the first place?
i don't know if it's that i've lost respect or feel as if i would never feel emotionally secure with him but in a way, he's not worth it to me. i honestly don't care if i know deep down that we would be very happy together. i stubbornly refuse to allow him back in because i can't trust that it's not going to end the exact same way and if it does, that makes me a fool...twice.
i'm not sure if this is what your taurus is feeling but if he is, you have your work cut out for you. you're going to have to chase him. you're going to have to convince him that the emotional roller coaster you had him on won't happen again. we like to chase but soon we're reminded that what we really want is security. and in a way, we want to possess our lovers just like everything else in our lives. if he has a sense that you can truly be his, that you two can build a life together then maybe he'll start being so iffy. until then, he'll flirt, be your friend, he'll give you every indication that he wants more and just when you think he's about to...he says good night. i do it with my aqua-ex all the time.
Maybe "snubbed" was the wrong word for me to use. We were just friends....he pursued me here and there but i never did anything to hurt him i dont believe. I just didn't give in easily. I didn't want to be "just another gir" He has quite the "heartbreaker" rep. As do i. I feel like i finally met my match. But i don't think its supposed to be this hard....
He told me once that he "thinks im a sweetheart but i don't have good intentions" I replyed, "Im not alllllllll that sweet but i do have good intentions"
And another time he said to me about himself, "I'm really charming, don't fall for me"
ah, total red flag right there. I guess well see what happens......
hes an amazing guy, as long as i dont lose his friendship in the long run then im ok with the outcome.
I'd love for him to match me in my chasing.....but i guess the tables always turn eventually. I bet the moment i decide i cant put my heart out there anymore, hell start chasing after me and be the one to get irritated by my aloofness......this seems to be our reacurring cycle or something.
thanks for sharing your story with me.....I almost feel bad for your aqua ex. But he made his bed......now hes gotta lay in it. Most people have a cut off where they just cant take it anymore. the fighting for the relationship outweighs the relationship itself.
hmmm...i dunno then. he doesn't think you have good intentions? that's interesting. what a weird thing to say :?
yes, i dont quite get it myself....
!

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