How does a Taurus woman behave in a sour r'ship?

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TaureanTaxonomy
@TaureanTaxonomy
11 Years

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I am a woman in a strange situation with another woman. Both of us are Taurus, I'm single but she has a boyfriend she has been with long term. It's also probably noteworthy for me to reveal that she is someone of moderate celebrity status in a very well known European band. It is obvious she is unhappy, because no one, especially her fanbase at home, even knows about this boyfriend OR her sexuality. In fact, she seems to dodge such questions in interviews and although we have talked in-depth about many personal things, she only revealed his existence much much later and I still don't even know his name or ANYTHING about him.


I'm a little more than confused, because aside from this boyfriend (who she claims supports her band financially at the moment), it seems like VERY untaurean behavior to pretend your significant other doesn't even EXIST 90% of the time! Further more, I am extremely certain of her attraction to me and honestly, I've grown quite attached. I have no idea how to go about handling this or deciphering what she wants me to do. She adores the way I speak/write intelligently and romantically, but then suddenly becomes aggressive or silent randomly, as if she is ANGRY about things I have said! She has said several times, quite seriously, that she trusts me completely.....yet she is extremely reluctant to open up beyond a certain shallow depth about herself. We used to talk every single day, even while she was on tour or recording. Now we have gone a week without communication, because I honestly have no idea what to do and I'm starting to feel rather down in the confusion of it all.
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M143
@M143
12 Years1,000+ Posts

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You are both bi I guess. Some Taureans they don't understand themselves. If I were you. It's time to go
against the flow. I've heard a living testimony in this in our big church.

He is a Taurus man. Successful doctor and actor. Sooo handsome and rich.
But he had 3 attempts of suicidal. swallowed more than dozen of medicines to cut his life because he cannot even accept himself. Yet he was frustrated when he opened his eyes and he was in an emergency hospital.
However, I am not very rational to give you advice because I am pretty sure you wouldn't like it.

All I can say Spare your soul. Taurus have a problem of *indulgence* and they cannot even fathom it.
They get carried away by those enticing moments and suffered depression because it's a *guilt* within
and not practicing a life free from that addiction.






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M143
@M143
12 Years1,000+ Posts

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TT,

I had a battle with that with some ex taurus. He was into that - swinger, lgbt, etc... wife swapping others

all those * immoral acts* that made me to think - I don't want to die with AIDS. lol

Break free and run a miles.

Don't walk with dead people.

All I can say these kind of people will not even hesitate to cheat in a relationship. They will compensate

to their * I enjoy* this is me attitude. well, Fool Me and I will show you a Hammer! lol.
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TaureanTaxonomy
@TaureanTaxonomy
11 Years

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Posted by M143
TT,

I had a battle with that with some ex taurus. He was into that - swinger, lgbt, etc... wife swapping others

all those * immoral acts* that made me to think - I don't want to die with AIDS. lol

Break free and run a miles.

Don't walk with dead people.

All I can say these kind of people will not even hesitate to cheat in a relationship. They will compensate

to their * I enjoy* this is me attitude. well, Fool Me and I will show you a Hammer! lol.




Are you implying that homosexuality is immoral? I really hope not. Further more, she has not in anyway attempted to be sexual with me. The most was innocent cuddling at the venue her band played. She's been nothing but respectful and is an extremely good person.
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TaureanTaxonomy
@TaureanTaxonomy
11 Years

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If you respect my views in life, then you should practice neutrality in such events as this. I am a non-religious person, but I dated a muslim woman for three years. Her and I are still good FRIENDS and have always respected and maintained with little to no effort, neutrality. Did we talk about our personal views? Of course. You can do that and not be offensive. The key is to not insult someone while deep in discussion and try to convince them on how wrong they are. I do not hate religion, as it plays a very important role in the development of culture. But, I do demand actual respect if I am to have a conversation with someone, not passive aggressive faux respect.
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M143
@M143
12 Years1,000+ Posts

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Yes. You are sensitive. I am judgemental. Whatever it is. I now go exit.

already had that battle with an ex taurus. I already consulted how many times to the wise people.

Am I very judgemental? They said It's rebuke. I said yes I am judgemental. They insisted it's a rebuke.

They teach me to make it soft. low voice with a hammer words.

I bet it just sounds very different folks with a different strokes.

Sorry if I feel you uncomfortable. but already saw that feeling to an ex.

I just sometimes brushed off my shoulder and let them believe what they want to believe.
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Nyxx
@phEnyxBull876
11 YearsTaurus

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1) Don't listen to M. She pretty much put her foot in her mouth with her judgemental and condescending words abt what she believes to be immoral. And based on her proclamation of being straight and only going for the D, any advice she gives on dealing with a female Taurus is moot. She's also inadvertantly putting you down by saying run from any Taurus when you are a Taurus yourself.

2) That said, Taurus men and women are HIGHLY different. I would look for advice specifically on taurean women.

3) Your lady actually does sound like what a Taurus would do in the circumstance she is in. She's sticking with something that a) is secure and comfortable, and b) apparently is helping to (financially) support her work/dream.

Could they have some sort of "arrangement"? Is he older? Maybe he's gay? Does she tell you anything else about him?

Forget what she wants for a minute...what do you want? You say you have a very strong moral code...yet are you open to being with someone who's in a relationship?

As you're both Tauruses, I'd recommend looking into her other placements to get a better understanding if why she's acting the way she is. Not that that would give you the "right" answer in what to do here... But more often than not, the solution to that is asking her. 🙂
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TaureanTaxonomy
@TaureanTaxonomy
11 Years

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I am sensing you are a person who has been through a lot of hard times, many confusions, and feels safer to keeps all the locks on all the doors with various deadbolts in place.

Everyone is judgmental in some way. Being judgmental is usually a security blanket to blindfold ourselves to the unknown or what we have had bad experiences with. I'll tell you a mostly well-kept secret about myself: I was extremely homophobic when I was younger, homophobic to the point that I was a bully in school. Seriously. I was homophobic because I was afraid and it was what I was taught to be, having grown-up in a strict southern baptist family.

Homosexuals can also be JUST AS JUDGMENTAL in regards to sexuality, especially militant lesbians (which I do not get along with very well). I cannot even begin to count how many times I have pissed off a militant lesbian who claimed so matter-of-factly that it was the penis that she did not like, and could not rebuttal my argument on sexuality being determined genetically and reciprocated by pheromones. That is was the pheromones of a man (the smells) that deterred her away and the pheromones of a woman that attracted her, not the penis.

I do not have any words to ease your fear. I do not know you. But, I do hope that you find courage at some point in your life to burn the blanket, because you can't live without the fire. It's the heat that makes you strong.
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Nyxx
@phEnyxBull876
11 YearsTaurus

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Posted by M143

Yes. You are sensitive. I am judgemental. Whatever it is. I now go exit.



Oh, but she does make me chuckle. She called me sensitive too, although I'm still not sure why. Let's see if she practices what she preaches and stays away from your post now. 😉

For the record, yes, I'm sensitive... to closeminded, generalizing, selfish bigots who has bad luck with men but blames it on their sign. *waves and shuts door*
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TaureanTaxonomy
@TaureanTaxonomy
11 Years

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Posted by phEnyxBull876
1) Don't listen to M. She pretty much put her foot in her mouth with her judgemental and condescending words abt what she believes to be immoral. And based on her proclamation of being straight and only going for the D, any advice she gives on dealing with a female Taurus is moot. She's also inadvertantly putting you down by saying run from any Taurus when you are a Taurus yourself.

2) That said, Taurus men and women are HIGHLY different. I would look for advice specifically on taurean women.

3) Your lady actually does sound like what a Taurus would do in the circumstance she is in. She's sticking with something that a) is secure and comfortable, and b) apparently is helping to (financially) support her work/dream.

Could they have some sort of "arrangement"? Is he older? Maybe he's gay? Does she tell you anything else about him?

Forget what she wants for a minute...what do you want? You say you have a very strong moral code...yet are you open to being with someone who's in a relationship?

As you're both Tauruses, I'd recommend looking into her other placements to get a better understanding if why she's acting the way she is. Not that that would give you the "right" answer in what to do here... But more often than not, the solution to that is asking her. 🙂



Thank you for actually giving some foundation to constructive advice! She does not give ANY detail about the boyfriend aside from my figuring out he is a gemini and that she calls him "The boyfriend" and nothing else. When she was here in my city it was then she revealed to be that he financially supports her band, but also stressed that she was trying very hard to severe that financial independence. I believe her on that and have seen action on her part in trying to do so.

What do I want? I must confess to developing some serious feelings for her, but I have not really done anything beyond letting her know. I cannot and will not indulge in the idea of any kind of relationship while she is with someone else, no matter how unhappy with that person she seems. Her friendship is of course without a doubt very important to me, I'm just at a loss. Asking her outright is very hard, because of her rockstar status and fear of media leak no matter how much she trusts me. She dodges any work-up of such a question.
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Nyxx
@phEnyxBull876
11 YearsTaurus

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Simply put, if you can't ask her or get a straight answer, then there's nothing to figure out...for now. That's not to say time won't change things. The only thing you have control over right now is taking care of your own feelings. You're attached...think of this no communication as a good time to get that in check. You care for her...continue to be patient and be her friend first and foremost. How patient and how long is totally up to you and rightly so.

Then again, realistically, you've acknowledged you have growing feelings for her. Can you truly maintain just being friends with her? That sounds like a recipe for anxiety and self doubt and questioning that can spiral out. Although it's these situations that help us further understand ourselves, what we can handle and what we let go.

And there's the obvious: she's a celeb. With all that has to come some ups and downs that perhaps we just can't comprehend. How long have you 2 been friends? I wouldn't jump the gun just yet and take her unresponsiveness personal until you have some concrete contact. Til then, get your heart in check. Funny how we can be so book smart, but when it comes to like and love, it all goes out the window. 😉
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TaureanTaxonomy
@TaureanTaxonomy
11 Years

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Posted by phEnyxBull876
Simply put, if you can't ask her or get a straight answer, then there's nothing to figure out...for now. That's not to say time won't change things. The only thing you have control over right now is taking care of your own feelings. You're attached...think of this no communication as a good time to get that in check. You care for her...continue to be patient and be her friend first and foremost. How patient and how long is totally up to you and rightly so.

Then again, realistically, you've acknowledged you have growing feelings for her. Can you truly maintain just being friends with her? That sounds like a recipe for anxiety and self doubt and questioning that can spiral out. Although it's these situations that help us further understand ourselves, what we can handle and what we let go.

And there's the obvious: she's a celeb. With all that has to come some ups and downs that perhaps we just can't comprehend. How long have you 2 been friends? I wouldn't jump the gun just yet and take her unresponsiveness personal until you have some concrete contact. Til then, get your heart in check. Funny how we can be so book smart, but when it comes to like and love, it all goes out the window. 😉



Totally. Science cannot help me here, lol. We have not been friends for that long, not even a year. She started creeping me on a couple social medias, but remained quiet as a mouse until right before her North American tour this year. She is coming back next year in May and already has me on her guestlist 😛 I do know she trusts me on a fairly high level, because no celeb just agrees on jumping into your car and running off with you for a few hours alone, without having met you in person first hand. I know us taureans can also be terribly prideful in concerns of money, but she even let me buy her coffee and chocolate, which was a test of that on my end.

And I will never forget how great she smelled when she cuddled into me after her set. I still wonder how she was able to get so clean and smell so amazing after sweating on stage so much!!
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TaureanTaxonomy
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11 Years

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Posted by phEnyxBull876
Aw, this all sounds good! You know we also like to get wayyyy ahead of ourselves when we really dig someone lol. So just keep it cool. The time apart will do you good. She is a Taurus...she won't forget you by a long shot. 😉

Patience, my fellow taurean! It is our not so secret weapon.



Ugh, I hate when I do that, too!! It's like....you don't even realize you are jumping the gun until AFTER you've already done it. Then you just want to hide forever lol.
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Nyxx
@phEnyxBull876
11 YearsTaurus

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Posted by TaureanTaxonomy
Posted by phEnyxBull876
Aw, this all sounds good! You know we also like to get wayyyy ahead of ourselves when we really dig someone lol. So just keep it cool. The time apart will do you good. She is a Taurus...she won't forget you by a long shot. 😉

Patience, my fellow taurean! It is our not so secret weapon.



Ugh, I hate when I do that, too!! It's like....you don't even realize you are jumping the gun until AFTER you've already done it. Then you just want to hide forever lol.
click to expand




Lol our gift and curse! If I were you I probably would've already:

1) run myself ragged with overthinking

2) sent a huge text about how the other person doesn't care and I'm all alone in my feels

3) run and hide in my bed

4) repeat #1 while dreading a reply lolol
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M143
@M143
12 Years1,000+ Posts

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Posted by Rambunctious76
Posted by M143
TT,

I had a battle with that with some ex taurus. He was into that - swinger, lgbt, etc... wife swapping others

all those * immoral acts* that made me to think - I don't want to die with AIDS. lol .



Please DON'T equate swinger culture with the lgbt community. It's not the same thing. Not all lgbt people are swingers just as not all swingers are lgbt people(quite possibly majority are heterosexual and don't identify as lgbt).

And that comment about dying from AIDS...I don't even...
click to expand





whatever it is. I am done. thanks.
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TaureanTaxonomy
@TaureanTaxonomy
11 Years

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Posted by phEnyxBull876
Posted by TaureanTaxonomy
Posted by phEnyxBull876
Aw, this all sounds good! You know we also like to get wayyyy ahead of ourselves when we really dig someone lol. So just keep it cool. The time apart will do you good. She is a Taurus...she won't forget you by a long shot. 😉

Patience, my fellow taurean! It is our not so secret weapon.



Ugh, I hate when I do that, too!! It's like....you don't even realize you are jumping the gun until AFTER you've already done it. Then you just want to hide forever lol.



Lol our gift and curse! If I were you I probably would've already:

1) run myself ragged with overthinking

2) sent a huge text about how the other person doesn't care and I'm all alone in my feels

3) run and hide in my bed

4) repeat #1 while dreading a reply lolol
click to expand




That is EXACTLY what I have been doing!!!!!! MORE THAN ONCE!!
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Nyxx
@phEnyxBull876
11 YearsTaurus

Comments: 0 · Posts: 477 · Topics: 17
Posted by M143
Posted by Rambunctious76
Posted by M143
TT,

I had a battle with that with some ex taurus. He was into that - swinger, lgbt, etc... wife swapping others

all those * immoral acts* that made me to think - I don't want to die with AIDS. lol .



Please DON'T equate swinger culture with the lgbt community. It's not the same thing. Not all lgbt people are swingers just as not all swingers are lgbt people(quite possibly majority are heterosexual and don't identify as lgbt).

And that comment about dying from AIDS...I don't even...




whatever it is. I am done. thanks.
click to expand




Bye!
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TaureanTaxonomy
@TaureanTaxonomy
11 Years

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Posted by Geminlove
TaureanTaxonomy: i think you should give her some time to get her thoughts together. Maybe she is just a lil confused, but while giving her time and space be there for her. Taurus people love consistency, to be perfectly honest im not sure if she has feels for you or not 😢 i just cant tell. Whats her moon and venus sign?



I'm not really sure how to figure that out, although I do know her birthdate/year. Does that help?
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FirstDecanTaurianWoman0428
@FirstDecanTaurianWomen0428
11 Years10,000+ Posts

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Well giving my past. The way I handled the situation. First I forgave him, Second Is by leaving and packing my shit up. I can only take so much. I am a Taurus female and all I want to do is make it work no matter what. That is a habit we don't let go. But we do let go when there is no hope in our eyes. My Mars in Taurus and Pluto in Libra helped with that. Oddly my Mars got me in some toruble. When actually I just couldn't take it anymore. My Jupiter in Libra and Neptune in Sagittarius helped me expand my mind and step into the real world and do something better in it without the drama. Been single for along time.Thanks to my Aquarius moon..Now I don't put up with nothing. Either you have what it takes to be a mature man with respect and not me having to tell you what's wrong and right. Or you don't and I will just remain friends with you.
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Nyxx
@phEnyxBull876
11 YearsTaurus

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Here's just her rising, sun and moon to start. Keep in mind this is not tailored as it's a general time and birth city...


Rising Sign is in 15 Degrees Leo
You love to be the center of attention and you want to appear strong, confident and dominant. You are very proud of yourself, sometimes quite vain even. When all around you are bedraggled and falling apart, you look like a million bucks! Very dignified and honorable, you enjoy the power and privilege, but not the responsibilities, that come with leadership. You are very idealistic but can also be quite stubborn. Others impress you only if they have integrity (but wealth, power and influence can also turn your head). You prefer rich, elegant surroundings and possessions, and will try to acquire them as your budget allows. Physically, you are very impressive - - at your best you have a regal, charismatic demeanor and bearing. Try not to be such a showoff!

Sun is in 22 Degrees Taurus.
You are known for being patient, slow moving and careful -- you love to prolong and savor enjoyable times. You appreciate and need comfort, ease and warm surroundings. Be careful of a tendency to become placid and self-satisfied and to overeat (especially sweets). You require strenuous situations in order to grow and mature properly, even though you try to avoid them. Affectionate, even-tempered and slow to anger -- when you do become emotionally upset, you are also slow to forgive and time must pass before your calm returns. You demand real results from any situation -- abstractions are very difficult for you to comprehend. Very artistic, your hands love to mold and shape things. You portray an earthy, physical sexiness that others find quite seductive.

Moon is in 20 Degrees Scorpio.
Your feelings are very intense, never superficial. You tend to be either very angry or very sad or completely and totally happy. Your moods are deep, extreme and not always completely understood by yourself or by those with whom you have to deal. Emotionally, you tend to prefer to live at the cutting edge of life, pushing your reactions to the ultimate extremes, even if the results are dangerous or upsetting. You are easily jealous and very suspicious -- you require a great deal of emotional reassurance. A good detective, you are very curious about deep and mysterious things, especially human nature and motivations. Be careful not to be ruthless, tactless or too overly frank or you will meet with much resistance from others.
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TaureanTaxonomy
@TaureanTaxonomy
11 Years

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Posted by phEnyxBull876
Here's just her rising, sun and moon to start. Keep in mind this is not tailored as it's a general time and birth city...


Rising Sign is in 15 Degrees Leo
You love to be the center of attention and you want to appear strong, confident and dominant. You are very proud of yourself, sometimes quite vain even. When all around you are bedraggled and falling apart, you look like a million bucks! Very dignified and honorable, you enjoy the power and privilege, but not the responsibilities, that come with leadership. You are very idealistic but can also be quite stubborn. Others impress you only if they have integrity (but wealth, power and influence can also turn your head). You prefer rich, elegant surroundings and possessions, and will try to acquire them as your budget allows. Physically, you are very impressive - - at your best you have a regal, charismatic demeanor and bearing. Try not to be such a showoff!

Sun is in 22 Degrees Taurus.
You are known for being patient, slow moving and careful -- you love to prolong and savor enjoyable times. You appreciate and need comfort, ease and warm surroundings. Be careful of a tendency to become placid and self-satisfied and to overeat (especially sweets). You require strenuous situations in order to grow and mature properly, even though you try to avoid them. Affectionate, even-tempered and slow to anger -- when you do become emotionally upset, you are also slow to forgive and time must pass before your calm returns. You demand real results from any situation -- abstractions are very difficult for you to comprehend. Very artistic, your hands love to mold and shape things. You portray an earthy, physical sexiness that others find quite seductive.

Moon is in 20 Degrees Scorpio.
Your feelings are very intense, never superficial. You tend to be either very angry or very sad or completely and totally happy. Your moods are deep, extreme and not always completely understood by yourself or by those with whom you have to deal. Emotionally, you tend to prefer to live at the cutting edge of life, pushing your reactions to the ultimate extremes, even if the results are dangerous or upsetting. You are easily jealous and very suspicious -- you require a great deal of emotional reassurance. A good detective, you are very curious about deep and mysterious things, especially human nature and motivations. Be careful
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TaureanTaxonomy
@TaureanTaxonomy
11 Years

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Posted by scorchedearth
i'm the only taurus woman on the board who posts regularly that is attracted to women.

and i will say. if you have feelings for a woman who has a BOYFRIEND you are creating your own misery. it doesn't matter if she's miserable with him or not. there is apparently enough good that she is staying. you'd be better off finding another woman who is not attached and trying to have a relationship with someone who is actually available. there is no guarantee she likes you. and even if she does it doesn't matter because she's with someone else. unless you're one of those people that wants to steal someone away. which is your business. though i don't get the feeling you are. you said you weren't.

but let me ask you. would you wait around for years for her to come around? is your connection with her so strong that you're willing to disregard the partner and wait for if/when she's available?



Well, I know she stays because of the financial aid he gives to the band. I didn't ask to let my feels fall into a state of heart congestion, truth be told I tried my best to ward it off entirely. Falling for a musician just reeks of trouble, especially a popular one. A few days before she came to town I even called off our meeting up, but she begged me and I caved. Sigh, she even played the first song of her set just for me that night after we hung out alone. Would I wait for her? I don't think I can answer that, because I don't know. Previously I have not been interested in even dating, much less deep romance. I've been happily single for over a 1 1/2 years, focusing on my education and research. I just don't even know......she flipped my whole world. I kind of hate her for that.