Mr. Big!

This topic was created in the Taurus forum by leonine_girl on Sunday, January 4, 2009 and has 4 replies.
So, here I am a year later, seeking casual advice regarding my ex-taurean who never really became an ex, atleast in my state of mind.
Our relationship, is pretty much a replica of Carrie and Big from sex and the city. And it ain't just me, its pretty much a lateral comparison all my friends have made.
Anyway, we split cause we wanted different things, I wanted more of a commitment and he said he wasn't ready. We broke up 'exactly' in the same style they have the first 'moving to paris' break up. I'm a recent fan of the show, and the similarity almost made me find humour in my situation. I mean even our friggin lines were the same ("you'd be coming to Bangalore for yourself, not just for me right?").
Anyway so I walked out of the relationship, physically but never emotionally.
He was really bummed, angry when I moved away, but then he never committed to me himself right?

He kept in touch and has till date. We had a few bad fights over months, where we said mean stuff, and thought lets forget it since we aren't kids and have remained in touch nonetheless. He is hot and cold, but I've stopped reacting, we've been in touch since a year, talk once in a week or more, its usually brief, once in a blue intense.
I'm just not over him, haven't been able to date even a year later. Have moved ahead in my career, made a whole different life outside of him, but emotionally can't give that place to anyone else.
He seems chilled, talks casually, jokes etc. Treats me like one of the many friends he has, atleast shows that's the case. Should I give up?
I can't confront him, and have a straight talk, cause if he actually does treat me like a mere friend, it would kill everything we have left, and I don't want that. I don't wanna freak him out.
He really doesn't give a shit right?
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LOL - 'butter' is so not the word I had used Tongue
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No help?! Sad
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your stuck....if you don't move on LIKE Carrie did then you will never get your Mr.Big, at some point Carrie cut all communication and went to Paris, she was lonely, she was scared, she was bored but she never once called Big for support, you haven't done that, you haven't chose the no contact concept and if your always available even the few times you communicate then why should he feel threatened by the loss of you and feel a sudden urgency to have you in his life, your still around, you still are open to him emotionally, HE HAS YOU and he doesn't even have to give back, wow that really works out for him...I'm sure your hoping friendship will miraculously turn into relationship, yet it hasn't and it simply won't happen if you don't make some hard choices, he has to miss you in order to yearn for you and need you but how can he do that if you still communicate? I can't tell you to cut him loose but what I can say is no contact truly works wonders with men like your Mr.Big
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