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Mar 12, 2015Comments: 2 · Posts: 411 · Topics: 17
First let me say I am a Virgo Sun...Cancer Moon...Cancer Ascendant.
Flashback....1st true love was a Taurus, May 13th, together 5yrs throughout late teens until he unfortunately passed away. He & I even went back n forth just a bit in our relationship but could never get away from each other....loved each other too much. Fought once a year and always made up no less than 2 - 3 days later....just our routine. We were living together when he passed and it took me approx 2 yrs to get over.
Moving forward, I was with a Cancer 8yrs...loved him dearly...but never fell in love with him....and a Capricorn for 4yrs....absolutely fell in love with him. Both relationships I ended....the Cancer for cheating.....the Capricorn "just because" or maybe his job just kept moving us around too much and I was tired of it ...no real reason though. Am great friends with both to this day.
Have always been a bit independent and a bit of a butterfly with dating men....I give my all emotionally but tend to either get bored and/or fed up w/ not meeting "my" standards and end up walking away & justifying it (typical Virgo). However, 20+ yrs passed and not 1 Taurus, not even attracted to another 1 since my 1st, and all of a sudden they've been coming out the woodwork since 2012! Have had 2 brief encounters with 2 of them in 2012 and have been dating my 3rd one of & on since 2013, mostly because of both of our situations. My 3rd one is a bit unique...met online....talked for a couple months...thought it was going to be all fun becuz that's how both of us set it up...and it went down a dangerous emotional path too dam quickly! Found out after we talked for a month or so that his birthday was also "MAY 13th", same as my 1st and really made me hesitate to jump in....but us Virgos are always too dam curious sometimes...lol...so jump ahead I did! WTF did I do that for...in the very beg before anything happened between us he told me that he would "derail this train with us both on it if I ever tried to get off of it!" So we went back n forth ...on & off for good reasons....he & I both had separate other relationships we were undetermined if either of us would stay in (yeh...yeh...I know!)....and both of us were very honest about our circumstances....always have been. I'm out of mine and he's still in his. Both of us have tried to cut the other off...him back in late 2013 so we didn't see each other for almost 6 months,
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Mar 12, 2015Comments: 2 · Posts: 411 · Topics: 17
and me in fall of 2014 where we didn't see each other for 8 months no matter how many times he text/called or emailed me and I just didn't feel like it. So he used a scheme a couple weeks ago emailing me telling me he lost his phone and needed my number. I replied with my number and bam...comm lines back open...and we saw each other shortly thereafter (prolly not best move on my part). Me telling him I'm moving 2500 miles away in a couple months and him absolutely reminding me what he told me he would do in the very beg..."derailing the train if I ever tried to get off and that he expects to be doing this with me 20yrs from now"...he made dam sure I understood his intent (with me just smdh the whole time trying to get him to be a bit more realistic!). He travels alot with work and told me that since I'm moving from east to west that he has a 8-9 month contract on westcoast so will be spending alot of time there and expects to still see me (...me still smdh!!). The way I tend to slice as a Virgo is to move far away from my lover if I cannot stop the train and get off on my own (my job allows me to move unattached for the most part)...so to me as a Virgo its a matter of mind ruling the heart and trying to do what is right even though both of us were stupid for going in to begin with!. This is just my way of trying to get off the "train" safely. He has been texting me for the past 2 weeks wanting to see me again.....first couple texts I ignored...the ones he sent a week after asking me if I was scared of him now...I definitely responded (Virgos and challenges!)....the hardest part with him is the same dam weakness I had with my very 1st Taurus with the same exact bday....the simple ability to just STAY strong in my "NO"! Both of us know what it is when we're together intimately....he always spends the night when he visits (sometimes I just want to be alone and want him to leave but never tell him to...another Virgo trait!)...he says he really enjoys spending the night with me becuz of not just the physical of us going at it for 5 - 6 hours straight...but also that he loves the way I think...how I see life....truth is though....that's it...nothing more...and I dam sure don't fool myself into thinking anything other than what it truly is...hate blinders with a passion! And he knows I'm not trying to get into another relationship with anyone else anytime soon...just need a dam breather from all relationships!
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Mar 12, 2015Comments: 2 · Posts: 411 · Topics: 17
Just don't know why doesn't he just give up when I don't respond and when he knows this is not healthy because he's quite well aware that's the main reason "why" I'm not responding!!!
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Mar 12, 2015Comments: 2 · Posts: 411 · Topics: 17
INT....straight-forward...appreciate that! And ur right..."block" mos def works on Iphones too...lol! Thanks for the input...this will definitly not be a 20+yr run...let alone another week or 2 run! He wants to visit this week...but not gon happen since its left up to me. Us virgos are more realistic than most at times. I move in 3 weeks back west and whenever I'm there (originally from)...I do what us westcoast people do best...."roam" the dessert...lol!!!
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Mar 15, 2013Comments: 0 · Posts: 3979 · Topics: 6
This is why I could never take a Virgo relationship beyond friendship. They seem way too logical and practical with their emotions. It seems like its just too easy for them to disconnect and be alone, which ultimately isn't something I find romantically attractive in another person. If a Taurus is going to be with someone, I would think they want that ultra-committed "can't live without you" type of love - not this "I could take it or leave it", transient stuff.....
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Oct 25, 2010Comments: 2 · Posts: 8822 · Topics: 132
Virgos are mutable. I think in some ways she's mirroring his behavior, in which he doesnt sound all that committed himself.
Her wanting to move away is showing she has strong feelings but trying to break away because she knows its not going anywhere.
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May 25, 2012Comments: 122 · Posts: 5590 · Topics: 41
I guess I really am old. The truth that this dude is pursuing her while in a relationship isn't even a factor.
Shit's linear and relative. OP...you shouldn't be surprised. His sign, birth date, gender,none of that matters. If a person can't respect a relationship with the person they're dating...they ain't gonna,respect it with you. People forget that because of a connection but the other stuff like having integrity MATTERS MOST. All the warm in fuzzy feelings and "possibilities" face when it comes to the real.
He didn't respect the space with his girlfriend(neither did you) so what makes you think hes just gonna get it now and respect yours? You opened that door when you started messing with him while both of you were dating. Simply put, in reality it was a pairing of convenience...security...how Orwellian lol.
When you do right from the get go, you get right. Good luck
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Mar 12, 2015Comments: 2 · Posts: 411 · Topics: 17
TLS....its not that its "too easy" for us to disconnect and be alone even though it may appear that way....it's that we go in eyes open and try our hardest to keep them open regardless of what emotions may arise or not for that matter. For us, it helps protects us from allowing ourselves to get hurt in the long run or become overly optimistic about something we know more than likely will not end up going anywhere.....especially if we ever choose to go into a situation like the one I chose to. We also believe in "healthy selfishness"...meaning "alone down-time" to be able to give emotions later whenever it comes time to be with another. This is another way we rejuvinate our feelings and emotions so we can give them wholly when we know someone needs it.
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Mar 12, 2015Comments: 2 · Posts: 411 · Topics: 17
Listen earth people of dxpnet community (in my robot voice...lmao!!!)....I am not "emotionally detached"...LOL!!! He knows that I care deeply for him and want to do what's right. When we first starting seeing one another both of us were having alot of problems in our current other relationships. At one point he said he & his gf discussed things and she was moving out a month later and getting her own place. I told him then..."as a FRIEND I would strongly suggest that you allow yourself some down time for yourself and/or to date other people IF and WHEN you get out of your current relationship" because I feel like people who have been in relationships for at least 2+yrs should at least get a breather in between relationships. I also told him that I loved him dearly but will always be his FRIEND FIRST. The move with his gf never happened, hence the 1st break of 6 months. He knew I was going thru my own situation struggles in my own relationship at the time so the break was not a big deal. I ended my own because it was the "right thing to do" in spite of whatever else I had going on. So we saw each other briefly for a couple months after the 6 month lull and I decided I needed a break from him too! Again...not a big deal since he has a home with a gf in it for Christ sakes...lol!!! He knows I was never upset about him still being with his gf (he knows I'm very laid back & love to laugh), however, there is no way under the sun you're ever going to get all of my emotions pouring out of me onto you while you're still in another relationship you said you were going to step away from earlier....no matter how much I love you or care for you....that makes absolutely no sense in the world to do so! Yeah...ok Tauruses....I'll NOT be a "robot" (lmao still!!!) and just shower you will all my love & every single drop of my emotions no matter what you dish out to me.....(ummmm...that would be a "NO"...lmao!!!!)!!!!
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Mar 12, 2015Comments: 2 · Posts: 411 · Topics: 17
time to time...hate to admit it but it gets my blood flowing and emotions running deep...very few men have been able to balance this with me effectively & it often works to get me to fall in love! My cancer mate was never that...but I still loved him for what he WAS...to me at that time in my life...it was good enough.
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Mar 12, 2015Comments: 2 · Posts: 411 · Topics: 17
Oh...I forgot to add the one other minor detail that also kept me from falling in love with him....his CHEATING...lmao!!!