Posted by AliensusedourbogrollActually, she has stated this before. But I don't run away easily and i have made this extremely clear yet at the same time she asks why? why stick around for all the stress etc. I just tell her deal with it don't you want someone who accepts you are your worst as well as your best? then i tell her to get over herself and she snaps out of it.. well for awhile
She might feel you'll eventually leave her because of her (all in her head) inferiority. Those cancer placements can lead to insecurity. Your gonna have to show her you have staying power and you're not going anywhere.
Posted by ImpulsvI recently sat with her and spoke about this. That I can't handle the flip flop and she has come around. I will, however, give her breathing space. we both do out own individual activities hangout with friends etc without having to be around each other all the time like we normally do. Funny enough she expressed that since I have to give her space I feel distant to her and I informed her, no I just going with the flow I don't want to impose on her.
After three years though
She going have to set boundaries that she can't run away when life gets tough n how incredibly hurtful it is to her
Posted by aNEWdayShe has expressed she doesn't see why I'm with her based on where I am at in my life vs her. And I constantly tell her to stop the comparison. I'm with her because I want to be and told her the exactly what she does for me. But she does knock me down in other ways. I know it's not intentional but I makes me feel withdrawn and insecure. she keeps drill we have a communications issue yet I make all these attempts and try improve it. I talk more, write etc but yet same complaints over and over. I even ask can you make a suggestion or state exactly what instead of constantly knocking me.
As a Taurus moon I'm going through something similar.
I'm choosing to focus on my career because it's a big part of what helps me feel stable and content. Without stability there I cannot be the person I want to be to a lover , friend etc
So yea, I've become sort of a loner to focus. As a Taurus moon I find that I can have tunnel vision on one thing and it's hard to do my best if I have other focuses. I know that's bad, I try to find a balance.
This is probably where your girlfriend is. She may have chosen to focus on her career bc she personally doesn't feel stable without that part being ok so she cannot be the girlfriend you need right now. Despite this, if I was in a relationship i wouldn't go so far to ice that person out. The only reason I could see her icing you out is if she feel threatened by you and your career or that you are not being supportive of her. She may feel she cannot confide in you during these times.
Talk it out with her to get to the bottom of it.
Posted by KoniuchaaYea I have countless times. And it seems to be getting worst. I know a lot of her actions has nothing to do with me personally , it's her personal issues and I get caught in the mix because of im with her. Sometimes I get so confused as to what she needs, I give her space then she feels uneasy asking me about anything. I just don't know how to communicate with her.
OP, have you mentioned any of this to her? I am a Cancer moon too, so I get it. Relationships are important to me and I fight for them, but not if the other person is just taking off when they feel stressed. That is not a serious relationship.
Posted by Aliensusedourbogrollshe does suffer from depression. I have mention it but she gets mad at the thought. Alot of her issues comes from her dad he truly messed with her mentally.Posted by KoniuchaaPosted by AliensusedourbogrollAccording to the OP's story, the Taurus moon woman is the one that keeps taking off.
She might feel you'll eventually leave her because of her (all in her head) inferiority. Those cancer placements can lead to insecurity. Your gonna have to show her you have staying power and you're not going anywhere.
We all have stress in our lives.
Yeah I know it's the Taurus moon woman taking off. I'm just saying Taurus moon likes stability but her cancer placements could be playing with her head and causing insecurity (could be the reason why she feels inferior) so she's not feeling the stability with the OP.
Yes I know we all have stress in our lives. Don't think I'm condoning her actions, I'm just trying to find an explanation. I think not speaking to a SO for that length of time is hurtful and unproductive.
On a further note I just reread the OP. If this has been happening for 3 years I doubt there's anything the OP can do or say to make the girlfriend feel secure by now. She clearly has deep insecurity issues. I reckon the best thing the OP can do is try to convince her to get therapy for her insecurity (and maybe depression. Lack of contact, especially for long periods of time, is a sign of depression). If she won't do that then OP has to think long and hard about wether she wants to continue this merry go round.click to expand
Posted by AliensusedourbogrollShe doesnt intentionally we I dont think so. she would complain about how I have that I intimidate people. she says i have a strong presence that just commands respect and she sees that will the people around me. I keep telling her im not trying to, I realy dont care what people do. she states she knows but when people run jokes it would get to her ( i think she had a issue with dominance or something) I care nothing for control especially over people. But I have become very conscious of this.
How does she knock you down?
Posted by AliensusedourbogrollNot as much as I used to. because I tell her I won'tPosted by JheneDo you feel like you have to walk on egg shells around her?Posted by AliensusedourbogrollShe doesnt intentionally we I dont think so. she would complain about how I have that I intimidate people. she says i have a strong presence that just commands respect and she sees that will the people around me. I keep telling her im not trying to, I realy dont care what people do. she states she knows but when people run jokes it would get to her ( i think she had a issue with dominance or something) I care nothing for control especially over people. But I have become very conscious of this.
How does she knock you down?
Then she states there's a communication issue with us. Every little thing, it could be something so simple she blows up saying that. She has a problem with active listen but I don't drill in her head , I would make suggestions or I would repeat myself a lot to ensure she hears. This is one of the most draining things and it really frustrates me. This honestly even affects me at work I get so conscious of how I speak and write. I hate overthinking because I'm very critical. I want to speak to her about this today i just dont even know where to start.click to expand
Posted by NotSoInstantSee here's the thing for example I got aqua moon I can think and be expressive and give ideas then I got earth to calm down after I just had 100 things to do. So I'm up in the air constantly fretting, worrying, having fun or just mundane perhaps too.
For a Taurus moon,I hate boring stable stuff.
Enough said
Gemini Sun FTW
:-P