Unevolved Taurus

This topic was created in the Taurus forum by nerdyvirgp on Friday, December 11, 2015 and has 172 replies.
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So my "man" has decided to take a brake from us. He says he doesn't want to hold me back while he decides if he's ready for a commitment and he's pushing fucking 30!! I've been the only girl he's ever been SERIOUS about so I understand.

Anyways when I asked if I should leave him alone forever he never responded I then told him I needed closure to leave him alone for good and he also never responded to that (it's been a week now).

This happened after an argument where I walked out on him and def. hurt his feelings. i am trying to be patient but my Scorpio moon/rising is driving me insane. I do absolutely love him!
what did you say that hurt his feelings?
Posted by TaurusLovesScorpio
what did you say that hurt his feelings?


I think it was built up emotions over time. He rarely expresses himself and I am always calling out the little shit that he does. You know Virgos can nag but only because I care. This fight was just about him being so private and not completely opening up which he admitted.
what are his placements? Virgo criticism is hard to deal with, and so is Scorp criticism. I know I do a lot of retarded things that dont make sense to most people in my daily life, but I am so stubborn I really just hate it if someone has anything to say about it. Perhaps he is closed off because he feels judged or overly scrutinized - hemmed in or trapped by your opinions of him....then if you lose your temper and actually get disrespectful in these nitpicking sessions, that is when we start to feel it cant work....I am not sure you should be expecting too much evolution from a Taurus. I think we are just here to kinda smell the flowers and enjoy the fruits of our labor, experience beauty through our senses, etc. With all that Scorpio, your life might be more about massive karmic explosions going off all the time, exposing issues that need work, shedding older versions of yourself, being reborn stronger....or something deep and crazy along those lines....lol. It may be projection on your part to be expecting too much change out of him. Like you said, you love him. Let him enjoy his life, and try to build on his strengths. Maybe try more acceptance. Walking out is too much drama. If a woman does that to me that is a big indicator that it can't work. I take it as symbolic....
Posted by nerdyvirgp
Posted by TaurusLovesScorpio
what did you say that hurt his feelings?


I think it was built up emotions over time. He rarely expresses himself and I am always calling out the little shit that he does. You know Virgos can nag but only because I care. This fight was just about him being so private and not completely opening up which he admitted.
click to expand

opening up takes time for some people. especially when it comes to problems, taurus tend to go into a corner in there mind and deal with it on their own. we can't expect our partners to be everything we want in the the time frame we want. understanding and acceptance of another person's personhood is vital. maybe while you are waiting for him to evolve, that is just who he is.

and is this indicative of the nagging you were talking about? "he's pushing fucking 30!!" ouch.
Just leave him alone, for your sake aaand his.
Posted by TaurusLovesScorpio
Walking out is too much drama. If a woman does that to me that is a big indicator that it can't work. I take it as symbolic....

oops, guilty Straight Face
Posted by jeane
Posted by nerdyvirgp
Posted by TaurusLovesScorpio
what did you say that hurt his feelings?


I think it was built up emotions over time. He rarely expresses himself and I am always calling out the little shit that he does. You know Virgos can nag but only because I care. This fight was just about him being so private and not completely opening up which he admitted.

opening up takes time for some people. especially when it comes to problems, taurus tend to go into a corner in there mind and deal with it on their own. we can't expect our partners to be everything we want in the the time frame we want. understanding and acceptance of another person's personhood is vital. maybe while you are waiting for him to evolve, that is just who he is.

and is this indicative of the nagging you were talking about? "he's pushing fucking 30!!" ouch.

click to expand

their*
I have never been even 80% open to anyone. There has always been private stuff I didnt consider sharing. I think many Tauruses have this feature. Actually everyone has))
Posted by Impulsv
Open up is important in a relationship
Some of us feel it's a key ingredient for an authentic relationship.

Taurus did the same thing op when I didn't nag n just said it that if the relationship is to work he needs to be more open.

To his credit a year later he aknowledge he was more open with people

Thank you it is huge. I want to be apart of my partner not only walk beside him.
Posted by Impulsv
Open up is important in a relationship
Some of us feel it's a key ingredient for an authentic relationship.

Taurus did the same thing op when I didn't nag n just said it that if the relationship is to work he needs to be more open.

To his credit a year later he aknowledge he was more open with people

I asked so I can have clarity for myself and not to be waiting for an answer. No I am not unhappy but I am sad because he said to me I want a relationship with you months prior. Also in the beginning I asked him do you have a fear of commitment and his answer was no of course not. Now he says I admit I do have one.

That's fucking ridiculous that is BULLcrap. I know you understand his emotions but understand mine.
Posted by dewiklaessen1991
That means he can't let you go and want to leave you wondering maybe or he needs time to forget you maybe he's keeping you on a leash what is his moon and rising?

Virgo moon. I don't know his rising
Posted by jeane
Posted by nerdyvirgp
Posted by TaurusLovesScorpio
what did you say that hurt his feelings?


I think it was built up emotions over time. He rarely expresses himself and I am always calling out the little shit that he does. You know Virgos can nag but only because I care. This fight was just about him being so private and not completely opening up which he admitted.

opening up takes time for some people. especially when it comes to problems, taurus tend to go into a corner in there mind and deal with it on their own. we can't expect our partners to be everything we want in the the time frame we want. understanding and acceptance of another person's personhood is vital. maybe while you are waiting for him to evolve, that is just who he is.

and is this indicative of the nagging you were talking about? "he's pushing fucking 30!!" ouch.

click to expand

I inboxed you
Posted by nerdyvirgp
Posted by jeane
Posted by nerdyvirgp
Posted by TaurusLovesScorpio
what did you say that hurt his feelings?


I think it was built up emotions over time. He rarely expresses himself and I am always calling out the little shit that he does. You know Virgos can nag but only because I care. This fight was just about him being so private and not completely opening up which he admitted.

opening up takes time for some people. especially when it comes to problems, taurus tend to go into a corner in there mind and deal with it on their own. we can't expect our partners to be everything we want in the the time frame we want. understanding and acceptance of another person's personhood is vital. maybe while you are waiting for him to evolve, that is just who he is.

and is this indicative of the nagging you were talking about? "he's pushing fucking 30!!" ouch.


I inboxed you
click to expand

can you resend please? i've not received it. thanks.
Posted by busyeyes88
Posted by JDrakeThree years from now, you will either bless the day he left, or curse the day you took him back.

With the taurus having a virgo moon I may have to agree with you there!!

That is one of the worse positions for the moon in my opinion along with scorp moons!
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It is definitely hard for him. He's so critical on himself and has even said things like "how could a girl like you want me" or "I can't believe I'm with you" and even "do I even deserve you" ... I feel so bad sometimes and yeah my Scorpio moon is so intense but I try my best to control it. I know it overwhelms him and we've only been dating a year but I guess he needs more time.
Posted by Nevermore
And OP sounds like really young too..

I'm young and lol I am a chaser tbh. No heavy fire placement. That's actually how we started dating I went after him and he loved it. I am pushy but I haven't been the whole time we have been dating only towards this blow up. Now I see what happens when you do that lol
Posted by Infinite8
Posted by busyeyes88
Posted by Infinite8
Posted by busyeyes88
OP, it has only been a week so give him space, have no contact and don't blow up his phone leaving countless messages.

You have asked him ' should I leave you alone forever ".. That's your decision to make not his!!!! By saying that sentence alone is trying to manipulate him... He's not stupid. You are the one who is unhappy... Do what you need to do for YOU...

Confused how is that manipulative? Maybe she genuinely wants to know so that she DOESNT blow up his phone and/or make more efforts?

Maybe she needs the peace of mind of what to do next and just wants to know where he stands to move forward properly?

You are a Taurus - you can't help being the way that you are... She is a Virgo, she cannot help the way that she is... Shouldn't "accepting and understanding" come from BOTH parties if there is love?

I can't fathom out logically how someone else's life has to be dependent on someone else??

Why ask someone that question? It's her life? I bet he didn't answer that question either? It's not his decision to make! It comes across as manipulative to me!! But that's just me!

That's interesting... You can't fathom? You must be extremely independent.

It is her life just as much as it is his life. And she is simply asking what he plans to do. I don't know exactly why SHE is asking that question, but if I asked that question (and I would), it would be because I like open communication and I would like to know where the other person stands so that I don't waste my time OR the other persons time.

If someone has already decided that I am no good for them - that is them judging me and not accepting me too! Why would I want to stay and bother them when they clearly don't want me around? Wouldn't it be more peaceful to just go seperate ways?
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I wanted him to cutt the crap and tell me straight up. He then said he doesn't have an answer and isn't confident in his own decisions . If this was any other guy I would eat him alive and let him have it, but it's him so...
Posted by nerdyvirgp
Posted by Nevermore
And OP sounds like really young too..

I'm young and lol I am a chaser tbh. No heavy fire placement. That's actually how we started dating I went after him and he loved it. I am pushy but I haven't been the whole time we have been dating only towards this blow up. Now I see what happens when you do that lol
click to expand

what struck me most was the language you used. you love this guy. don't say "man"! eek! how hurtful for him for you to question his manhood. he cares for you. care for him and his feelings too! have compassion. think well of him and trust that he doesn't do this to hide his emotions from you, he probably really struggles with communicating it.

be a place that he can trust and rely upon so that when he begins to share, he won't feel attacked or punished that he isn't doing it faster.

understand that all of this takes time. be patient and communicate to him that you will be ready and a willing ear whenever he needs you. be the constant in his life.

ultimately, be kind to him. be kind to each other.
Posted by Nevermore
Posted by nerdyvirgp
Posted by Nevermore
And OP sounds like really young too..

I'm young and lol I am a chaser tbh. No heavy fire placement. That's actually how we started dating I went after him and he loved it. I am pushy but I haven't been the whole time we have been dating only towards this blow up. Now I see what happens when you do that lol

You have either fire mercury, venus or mars?
click to expand

Libra Venus
Scorpio Mars
Virgo Mercury lol
Posted by Impulsv
It seems n how it felt with the Taurus I dated it's their way or the highway. All about their pace n needs
Well what about my pace. it is just as valid. I just asked for middle ground n be stomped his feet n ended it.
I agree best to go seperate ways
Save ur self pain trying to figure it out.

it never works if you are competitors. you have to row in the same direction and sometimes one of you will be doing the lion's share of the work. it hopefully evens out in the end.
Posted by busyeyes88
Posted by nerdyvirgp
Posted by Infinite8
Posted by busyeyes88
Posted by Infinite8
Posted by busyeyes88
OP, it has only been a week so give him space, have no contact and don't blow up his phone leaving countless messages.

You have asked him ' should I leave you alone forever ".. That's your decision to make not his!!!! By saying that sentence alone is trying to manipulate him... He's not stupid. You are the one who is unhappy... Do what you need to do for YOU...

Confused how is that manipulative? Maybe she genuinely wants to know so that she DOESNT blow up his phone and/or make more efforts?

Maybe she needs the peace of mind of what to do next and just wants to know where he stands to move forward properly?

You are a Taurus - you can't help being the way that you are... She is a Virgo, she cannot help the way that she is... Shouldn't "accepting and understanding" come from BOTH parties if there is love?

I can't fathom out logically how someone else's life has to be dependent on someone else??

Why ask someone that question? It's her life? I bet he didn't answer that question either? It's not his decision to make! It comes across as manipulative to me!! But that's just me!

That's interesting... You can't fathom? You must be extremely independent.

It is her life just as much as it is his life. And she is simply asking what he plans to do. I don't know exactly why SHE is asking that question, but if I asked that question (and I would), it would be because I like open communication and I would like to know where the other person stands so that I don't waste my time OR the other persons time.

If someone has already decided that I am no good for them - that is them judging me and not accepting me too! Why would I want to stay and bother them when they clearly don't want me around? Wouldn't it be more peaceful to just go seperate ways?

I wanted him to cutt the crap and tell me straight up. He then said he doesn't have an answer and isn't confident in his own decisions . If this was any other guy I would eat him alive and let him have it, but it's him so...

As I said before, control your moon. Virgo moons don't do well with confrontation especially when it comes to "feelings "!! Your moon is too aggressive and you are acting like the man instead of him and taurus me
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Posted by Infinite8
Posted by jeane
Posted by Impulsv
It seems n how it felt with the Taurus I dated it's their way or the highway. All about their pace n needs
Well what about my pace. it is just as valid. I just asked for middle ground n be stomped his feet n ended it.
I agree best to go seperate ways
Save ur self pain trying to figure it out.

it never works if you are competitors. you have to row in the same direction and sometimes one of you will be doing the lion's share of the work. it hopefully evens out in the end.

Finding a middle ground is not being competitive.
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no, and all things being equal, it is the ideal. life is not like that. sometimes they carry you, sometimes you carry them. it's what being a partner is all about. you face things together and sincerely and wholeheartedly try to do your very best by your partner. keeping score is not helpful.
Posted by Infinite8
Posted by busyeyes88
The man is with her physically showing her..... Taurus will show feeling before they open up emotionally. I have never ever forced another human being to open up to me... I have let them be themselves and felt them out "intuitively". If they tell me personal things or secrets etc it's their choice I have not asked this of them!!! But people are different we do all run at the same time.. If a person has no patience and always looking for "validation" or "relationship updates" then walk away.... Taurus is not for you.

This is true! I would be less inclined to ask such questions if I can clearly see it in behavior. To me, actions speak louder than words. The eyes as well... If I see live in the eyes, I am calm and I know what's up.

But, if he is avoiding me and I haven't seen him in weeks because he is upset? I want to know what's up... Because there is nothing else to go by!
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Exactly when I look into his eyes I can see his feelings for me and true intentions . But then we have a fight and your just ready to give up. It's just bizarre to me and sounds like he's scared. And when I put "man" in quotes I said man because at this moment he is not acting like my man he is distant from me. I was not challenging his manhood
Posted by busyeyes88
@I8
My eyes are fine and I can see the bigger picture.. Her taurus is in hiding and he has a right to do so. He has set her free to find someone who will be more open on her timescale!!

How has he set me free when he hasn't even said if we're through or not. What he said was I need to make my decision. Taurus people are so one track minded there is not one person in this relationship their is two.
Posted by busyeyes88
Posted by nerdyvirgp
Posted by Infinite8
Posted by busyeyes88
The man is with her physically showing her..... Taurus will show feeling before they open up emotionally. I have never ever forced another human being to open up to me... I have let them be themselves and felt them out "intuitively". If they tell me personal things or secrets etc it's their choice I have not asked this of them!!! But people are different we do all run at the same time.. If a person has no patience and always looking for "validation" or "relationship updates" then walk away.... Taurus is not for you.

This is true! I would be less inclined to ask such questions if I can clearly see it in behavior. To me, actions speak louder than words. The eyes as well... If I see live in the eyes, I am calm and I know what's up.

But, if he is avoiding me and I haven't seen him in weeks because he is upset? I want to know what's up... Because there is nothing else to go by!

Exactly when I look into his eyes I can see his feelings for me and true intentions . But then we have a fight and your just ready to give up. It's just bizarre to me and sounds like he's scared. And when I put "man" in quotes I said man because at this moment he is not acting like my man he is distant from me. I was not challenging his manhood

I have seen scorpio moon in action over a span of 11 years... I'd be running too!!!!

That moon can be very abusive BIG TIME!!
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Unintentionally. But the sun of Taurus is emotionally abusive. Not talking to someone periods of time just because your is ego is hurt. Not saying that is done on purpose either just your nature
Posted by busyeyes88
Posted by nerdyvirgp
Posted by busyeyes88
@I8
My eyes are fine and I can see the bigger picture.. Her taurus is in hiding and he has a right to do so. He has set her free to find someone who will be more open on her timescale!!

How has he set me free when he hasn't even said if we're through or not. What he said was I need to make my decision. Taurus people are so one track minded there is not one person in this relationship their is two.

Exactly!! He has left YOU to make the decision as to whether your relationship is viable or not!!!
click to expand

Now this is where you can help me lol how exactly can I make that decision when one I can't even talk to him two he said that he needs to make a decision and three I cannot talk to him. Are you saying I have to choose to take it or leave it? Ridiculous it's called compromising not let the bull trample over me.
Posted by Infinite8
Posted by busyeyes88
@I8
My eyes are fine and I can see the bigger picture.. Her taurus is in hiding and he has a right to do so. He has set her free to find someone who will be more open on her timescale!!

Oh... So he gave up on her? She should just leave then? He didn't have the courage to be upfront?

He does have the right to behave any way he wishes... She was just asking to clear things up. It's sad that he didn't have the decency to give her that peace.

The way you paint it - no love or concern for the other party. Sounds SO SAD. I really do hope you are wrong.
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You get me. If I don't have peace I get obsessive so I just want clearing. Always felt more of a Scorpio than Virgo anyways
Posted by Infinite8
Posted by TaurusLovesScorpio
what are his placements? Virgo criticism is hard to deal with, and so is Scorp criticism. I know I do a lot of retarded things that dont make sense to most people in my daily life, but I am so stubborn I really just hate it if someone has anything to say about it. Perhaps he is closed off because he feels judged or overly scrutinized - hemmed in or trapped by your opinions of him....then if you lose your temper and actually get disrespectful in these nitpicking sessions, that is when we start to feel it cant work....I am not sure you should be expecting too much evolution from a Taurus. I think we are just here to kinda smell the flowers and enjoy the fruits of our labor, experience beauty through our senses, etc. With all that Scorpio, your life might be more about massive karmic explosions going off all the time, exposing issues that need work, shedding older versions of yourself, being reborn stronger....or something deep and crazy along those lines....lol. It may be projection on your part to be expecting too much change out of him. Like you said, you love him. Let him enjoy his life, and try to build on his strengths. Maybe try more acceptance. Walking out is too much drama. If a woman does that to me that is a big indicator that it can't work. I take it as symbolic....

So, if the bull is starting to think that it cannot work because she got disrespectful, nit picked and walked out... And we are to assume that once a Bulls has an idea in their head they pretty much don't change.... Then wouldn't you say it's best for her to just cut her losses and leave, not reach out or expect anything from him?

Since he has pretty much checked out and won't be changing his mind... Anything she does will just be a waste of her time, wouldn't you say? She can start accepting him and change her ways BUT it sounds like he won't be changing that thought of "it won't work".... So all effort of hers from now on is a waste of time, no?

That is the impression you are giving me.
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I think it depends largely on just how stubborn he is, and just how compatible they are in normal phases of the relationship....Plus, how often does this happen? If she blows up, and bails regularly, its too much instability. She's obviously hit a point where he feels like he needs to retreat emotionally. Since he has Virgo Moon, they probably mesh pretty well regularly. It seems bulls here are divided though on whether or not all decisions are final in relationships though. Some say "once I make up my mind, I'm done." I've never been like that personally though. I can be reasoned with as long as there's some plan or path to progress - some hope.
Posted by Infinite8
Confused but what you just described IS an equal balance IMO... Sometimes you are there for them and when you are in need they are there for you. That IS equal in the long run. Facing things TOGETHER ...IS having an equal.

I don't like to see it as keeping score, but if you notice that someone is there for you and you are there for them, it feels good. its not about keeping score or being mechanical about it... It's just about making sure that there is mutual concern. Do you see what I mean?

yes, i do see what you mean but sometimes you have to give allowances. i'm talking about the day to day, individual issues. this topic is about one aspect.

for example, he is struggling with communicating with her. being a taurus, he probably struggles with communicating his feelings in general.

op said "He rarely expresses himself and I am always calling out the little shit that he does. You know Virgos can nag but only because I care. This fight was just about him being so private and not completely opening up which he admitted."

this is one issue in the relationship. from all the issues that comprises their relationship she is stronger here. she'll have to carry him for a while. she'll have to reach past the middle ground. it's won't work if it is my way or the highway - on either part - but that doesn't not mean the only option is 50/50. it might be 80/20 for a bit when it comes to this. this is where it is not helpful to keep score.

i would hope in other areas he does his bit, if he doesn't and her needs aren't being met overall, then yes, i would agree, they are not compatible. we don't know if there isn't mutual concern. there seems to be there is. he has said how highly he regards her. he is probably there for her in other ways and struggles to be there in this one particular way. doesn't he deserve a bit of patience and compassion? from his partner no less?

browbeating and berating him into being open is never going to work. it's using a sledgehammer to crack a nut.
Posted by Infinite8
Posted by busyeyes88
OP, it has only been a week so give him space, have no contact and don't blow up his phone leaving countless messages.

You have asked him ' should I leave you alone forever ".. That's your decision to make not his!!!! By saying that sentence alone is trying to manipulate him... He's not stupid. You are the one who is unhappy... Do what you need to do for YOU...

Confused how is that manipulative? Maybe she genuinely wants to know so that she DOESNT blow up his phone and/or make more efforts?

Maybe she needs the peace of mind of what to do next and just wants to know where he stands to move forward properly?

You are a Taurus - you can't help being the way that you are... She is a Virgo, she cannot help the way that she is... Shouldn't "accepting and understanding" come from BOTH parties if there is love?
click to expand

There must be a rare planetary alignment because for once I agree with busy that this is manipulative *to* a Taurus. The Virgo is raising the stakes. From her perspective and how she's freaking out in the interim, it probably seems reasonable, but from a bull's perspective we need more time to make a decision like that with such finality. For someone to be like "Tell me now!! Is it over?!!!" Before our anger/emotions has even had a chance to settle and clear out a little, it feels like we're being forced...That's why he's ducking it. Just give him some time.
Posted by busyeyes88
Posted by JDrakeThree years from now, you will either bless the day he left, or curse the day you took him back.

With the taurus having a virgo moon I may have to agree with you there!!

That is one of the worse positions for the moon in my opinion along with scorp moons!
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My daughter has Virgo Moon, and is SOOOOOOO sensitive. Seems to be a key thing with that placement if you look it up.
Posted by Impulsv
It will be a matter of trust that while hes pulling 20/ n she 80
That it will change in time to come
Now ifts been a year n still the same do Taurus see the issue here.
But reality is people have to base it on the now as usually with time it gets worse n lazy. People get comfortable specially Taurus.

absolutely, trust is paramount. you have to trust your partner has your best interests at heart, otherwise what are you doing with them?!

you're right, a year is a long time but what has been the environment like? constant criticism? arguments? calling it quits and walking out? you take a giant leap back in progress if it happens often enough. what is a year in duration, may only be a few months in the relationship's progression.
Posted by Infinite8
Posted by jeane
Posted by Infinite8
Posted by jeane
Posted by Impulsv
It seems n how it felt with the Taurus I dated it's their way or the highway. All about their pace n needs
Well what about my pace. it is just as valid. I just asked for middle ground n be stomped his feet n ended it.
I agree best to go seperate ways
Save ur self pain trying to figure it out.

it never works if you are competitors. you have to row in the same direction and sometimes one of you will be doing the lion's share of the work. it hopefully evens out in the end.

Finding a middle ground is not being competitive.

no, and all things being equal, it is the ideal. life is not like that. sometimes they carry you, sometimes you carry them. it's what being a partner is all about. you face things together and sincerely and wholeheartedly try to do your very best by your partner. keeping score is not helpful.

Confused but what you just described IS an equal balance IMO... Sometimes you are there for them and when you are in need they are there for you. That IS equal in the long run. Facing things TOGETHER ...IS having an equal.

I don't like to see it as keeping score, but if you notice that someone is there for you and you are there for them, it feels good. its not about keeping score or being mechanical about it... It's just about making sure that there is mutual concern. Do you see what I mean?
click to expand

I love watching the Scorpish Libra and the Libra-like Scorp weigh out these matters of finding balance....lol.
Posted by engagement_hotdog
i eat libra venuses for breakfast

they do have great taste...lol
Posted by Infinite8
Posted by jeane
Posted by Infinite8
Confused but what you just described IS an equal balance IMO... Sometimes you are there for them and when you are in need they are there for you. That IS equal in the long run. Facing things TOGETHER ...IS having an equal.

I don't like to see it as keeping score, but if you notice that someone is there for you and you are there for them, it feels good. its not about keeping score or being mechanical about it... It's just about making sure that there is mutual concern. Do you see what I mean?

yes, i do see what you mean but sometimes you have to give allowances. i'm talking about the day to day, individual issues. this topic is about one aspect.

for example, he is struggling with communicating with her. being a taurus, he probably struggles with communicating his feelings in general.

op said "He rarely expresses himself and I am always calling out the little shit that he does. You know Virgos can nag but only because I care. This fight was just about him being so private and not completely opening up which he admitted."

this is one issue in the relationship. from all the issues that comprises their relationship she is stronger here. she'll have to carry him for a while. she'll have to reach past the middle ground. it's won't work if it is my way or the highway - on either part - but that doesn't not mean the only option is 50/50. it might be 80/20 for a bit when it comes to this. this is where it is not helpful to keep score.

i would hope in other areas he does his bit, if he doesn't and her needs aren't being met overall, then yes, i would agree, they are not compatible. we don't know if there isn't mutual concern. there seems to be there is. he has said how highly he regards her. he is probably there for her in other ways and struggles to be there in this one particular way. doesn't he deserve a bit of patience and compassion? from his partner no less?

browbeating and berating him into being open is never going to work. it's using a sledgehammer to crack a nut.

Beautifully said. I agree 100% ... My mind doesn anyway. My actions might not always be as perfect though Sad
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thanks. i really do understand your point. my actions aren't perfect either. it's easy being a sideline critic. Big Grin it's much harder when you're the one dealing with the emotions, doubt and suspicion! i've had my fair share of spats over communication as well. the only thing that has calmed my reaction is time. i had to give it time.
Posted by TaurusLovesScorpio
Posted by Infinite8
Posted by jeane
Posted by Infinite8
Posted by jeane
Posted by Impulsv
It seems n how it felt with the Taurus I dated it's their way or the highway. All about their pace n needs
Well what about my pace. it is just as valid. I just asked for middle ground n be stomped his feet n ended it.
I agree best to go seperate ways
Save ur self pain trying to figure it out.

it never works if you are competitors. you have to row in the same direction and sometimes one of you will be doing the lion's share of the work. it hopefully evens out in the end.

Finding a middle ground is not being competitive.

no, and all things being equal, it is the ideal. life is not like that. sometimes they carry you, sometimes you carry them. it's what being a partner is all about. you face things together and sincerely and wholeheartedly try to do your very best by your partner. keeping score is not helpful.

Confused but what you just described IS an equal balance IMO... Sometimes you are there for them and when you are in need they are there for you. That IS equal in the long run. Facing things TOGETHER ...IS having an equal.

I don't like to see it as keeping score, but if you notice that someone is there for you and you are there for them, it feels good. its not about keeping score or being mechanical about it... It's just about making sure that there is mutual concern. Do you see what I mean?

I love watching the Scorpish Libra and the Libra-like Scorp weigh out these matters of finding balance....lol.
click to expand

shut yer face Big Grin
Posted by busyeyes88
Posted by TaurusLovesScorpio
Posted by busyeyes88
Posted by JDrakeThree years from now, you will either bless the day he left, or curse the day you took him back.

With the taurus having a virgo moon I may have to agree with you there!!

That is one of the worse positions for the moon in my opinion along with scorp moons!

My daughter has Virgo Moon, and is SOOOOOOO sensitive. Seems to be a key thing with that placement if you look it up.

Virgos are actually sensitive in a strange unobvious way!! They nag but they hate confrontation especially If the other party is viewed as "dominant " ie my virgo mother runs from me but has my Sag /aqua moon sister under her thumb.

A scorpio beating down on a taurus male with a Virgo moon he has too run and take a break..

But a Leo moon woman up against a gem man with scorp moons I will knock his block off so we will "square" upto each other or my leo sun scorp moon bestie will shut the hell up when she feels the heat from my leo moon.

So yep, Virgo moons are extremely sensitive. My ex Aquarius husband of many many years past had this placement and he used to cry like a baby!!!
click to expand

Virgo Sun with someone who has a Virgo Moon might be a tough one in some respects. I know two Virgo M/Virgo F couples,and once either one starts criticizing, it is all downhill from there. Really, OP will have to practice more acceptance IMO. Virgo Moon is extra self-critical and sensitive to others' criticisms. The emotional openness might also be due to the Moon placement; apparently they repress a lot, sometimes to the point of physical sickness. Calling someone out on their shit might feel like the right thing to do, but even the way she phrased that - sounds vindictive, condescending, etc. Scorp Moon seeing a weakness and exploiting it, being a tad malicious? From having a Virgo mom, and quite a few Virgo friends, one astro cliche that I feel is true about Virgos is that they will sit and coldly criticize all day long (often with great insight), but when you put them under the same critical lens, they *hate* it and will often concede nothing. That's when the emotions really come out, or really... shut down. The wall goes up. When both people are this way, it can create a major stalemate in the relationship, so two people with strong Virgo placements are really going to have to practice the golden rule with regards to "calling out". Seems to work REALLY well when they can do that though.
Posted by nerdyvirgp
Posted by busyeyes88
Posted by nerdyvirgp
Posted by Infinite8
Posted by busyeyes88
The man is with her physically showing her..... Taurus will show feeling before they open up emotionally. I have never ever forced another human being to open up to me... I have let them be themselves and felt them out "intuitively". If they tell me personal things or secrets etc it's their choice I have not asked this of them!!! But people are different we do all run at the same time.. If a person has no patience and always looking for "validation" or "relationship updates" then walk away.... Taurus is not for you.

This is true! I would be less inclined to ask such questions if I can clearly see it in behavior. To me, actions speak louder than words. The eyes as well... If I see live in the eyes, I am calm and I know what's up.

But, if he is avoiding me and I haven't seen him in weeks because he is upset? I want to know what's up... Because there is nothing else to go by!

Exactly when I look into his eyes I can see his feelings for me and true intentions . But then we have a fight and your just ready to give up. It's just bizarre to me and sounds like he's scared. And when I put "man" in quotes I said man because at this moment he is not acting like my man he is distant from me. I was not challenging his manhood

I have seen scorpio moon in action over a span of 11 years... I'd be running too!!!!

That moon can be very abusive BIG TIME!!

Unintentionally. But the sun of Taurus is emotionally abusive. Not talking to someone periods of time just because your is ego is hurt. Not saying that is done on purpose either just your nature
click to expand

He is just in retreat mode, healing from what he perceives as your abuse. He won't give you the peace of putting your fears to rest, but you won't give him the peace of having a little space, time to heal and think things over a bit before he makes a drastic decision....
Posted by Nevermore
The whole thing is that he DID said that he wants to take a break and he DID said that he'll decided when he's ready to commit. There's no timetable of this break.

Break was supposed to take a time for yourself to think about this relationship when you wanted to be continuously or not.. or need to think after that argument.
Yet somehow, suddenly disturbed after a week.. we find that person "desperations" or doesn't understand what "break" means.

Or was it really hard to understand that?


I get what that means just trying to better understand the situation. Since my view includes my emotions it is nice to hear what people think from an outside perspective especially another Taurus opinion.
Posted by TaurusLovesScorpio
Posted by nerdyvirgp
Posted by busyeyes88
Posted by nerdyvirgp
Posted by Infinite8
Posted by busyeyes88
The man is with her physically showing her..... Taurus will show feeling before they open up emotionally. I have never ever forced another human being to open up to me... I have let them be themselves and felt them out "intuitively". If they tell me personal things or secrets etc it's their choice I have not asked this of them!!! But people are different we do all run at the same time.. If a person has no patience and always looking for "validation" or "relationship updates" then walk away.... Taurus is not for you.

This is true! I would be less inclined to ask such questions if I can clearly see it in behavior. To me, actions speak louder than words. The eyes as well... If I see live in the eyes, I am calm and I know what's up.

But, if he is avoiding me and I haven't seen him in weeks because he is upset? I want to know what's up... Because there is nothing else to go by!

Exactly when I look into his eyes I can see his feelings for me and true intentions . But then we have a fight and your just ready to give up. It's just bizarre to me and sounds like he's scared. And when I put "man" in quotes I said man because at this moment he is not acting like my man he is distant from me. I was not challenging his manhood

I have seen scorpio moon in action over a span of 11 years... I'd be running too!!!!

That moon can be very abusive BIG TIME!!

Unintentionally. But the sun of Taurus is emotionally abusive. Not talking to someone periods of time just because your is ego is hurt. Not saying that is done on purpose either just your nature

He is just in retreat mode, healing from what he perceives as your abuse. He won't give you the peace of putting your fears to rest, but you won't give him the peace of having a little space, time to heal and think things over a bit before he makes a drastic decision....
click to expand

Yeah but on Taurus time we all know that can be a lifetime ...
Posted by TaurusLovesScorpio
Posted by Infinite8
Posted by jeane
Posted by Infinite8
Posted by jeane
Posted by Impulsv
It seems n how it felt with the Taurus I dated it's their way or the highway. All about their pace n needs
Well what about my pace. it is just as valid. I just asked for middle ground n be stomped his feet n ended it.
I agree best to go seperate ways
Save ur self pain trying to figure it out.

it never works if you are competitors. you have to row in the same direction and sometimes one of you will be doing the lion's share of the work. it hopefully evens out in the end.

Finding a middle ground is not being competitive.

no, and all things being equal, it is the ideal. life is not like that. sometimes they carry you, sometimes you carry them. it's what being a partner is all about. you face things together and sincerely and wholeheartedly try to do your very best by your partner. keeping score is not helpful.

Confused but what you just described IS an equal balance IMO... Sometimes you are there for them and when you are in need they are there for you. That IS equal in the long run. Facing things TOGETHER ...IS having an equal.

I don't like to see it as keeping score, but if you notice that someone is there for you and you are there for them, it feels good. its not about keeping score or being mechanical about it... It's just about making sure that there is mutual concern. Do you see what I mean?

I love watching the Scorpish Libra and the Libra-like Scorp weigh out these matters of finding balance....lol.
click to expand

My daily struggle lol .
Posted by busyeyes88
Posted by Impulsv
Posted by busyeyes88
Posted by Impulsv
Posted by Nevermore
Posted by Impulsv
Taurus think ur the only observing
Others observe how u will be n if all ur putting is 20 what do expect. U want blind faith here n it's not fair. Why not be best u can be period vs hiding behind walls.

Taurus will think if in that kind of behavior as "inpatient", "selfish" or dumb to know what "taking a break" means.

Well obviously we won't see eye to eye
As quick to judge as impatient when u can't even validate a real concern to ur partner n not even willing so see it from their eyes.


It's pure logic really and taurus are more logical than emotional.

Ironically it's ask we trust in faith but pure logic says if they givin20 that's all that will be given. Does it make sense?

N yes it was very clear to me had to do with past issues.

I grew up with a perfectionist virgo mother so I can imagine the OP has probably spent countless times bashing away at him and his only option now is to shut down and take a break however long it suits him and leave her to stew in her mess!!!

He has probably demonstrated in other ways his feelings for her by respecting her and doing things for her which my experience of a taurus man is out of this world. You can feel their presence with you! She probably took those things for granted and just kept bashing on about his openness and just by the grammar and intensity of her written words and having been at the receiving end of a forceful angry scorp moon people myself, well I don't blame him.

Virgo women when angry can make any masculine man feel emancipated!!
click to expand

Yes to all this. And I also grew up with a Virgo perfectionist mom.
Posted by Infinite8
Posted by busyeyes88
Posted by Infinite8
Posted by TaurusLovesScorpio
Posted by Infinite8
Posted by busyeyes88
OP, it has only been a week so give him space, have no contact and don't blow up his phone leaving countless messages.

You have asked him ' should I leave you alone forever ".. That's your decision to make not his!!!! By saying that sentence alone is trying to manipulate him... He's not stupid. You are the one who is unhappy... Do what you need to do for YOU...

Confused how is that manipulative? Maybe she genuinely wants to know so that she DOESNT blow up his phone and/or make more efforts?

Maybe she needs the peace of mind of what to do next and just wants to know where he stands to move forward properly?

You are a Taurus - you can't help being the way that you are... She is a Virgo, she cannot help the way that she is... Shouldn't "accepting and understanding" come from BOTH parties if there is love?

There must be a rare planetary alignment because for once I agree with busy that this is manipulative *to* a Taurus. The Virgo is raising the stakes. From her perspective and how she's freaking out in the interim, it probably seems reasonable, but from a bull's perspective we need more time to make a decision like that with such finality. For someone to be like "Tell me now!! Is it over?!!!" Before our anger/emotions has even had a chance to settle and clear out a little, it feels like we're being forced...That's why he's ducking it. Just give him some time.

So, at that point... Responding "I need more time to think about it" is not a possibility? She just wants to know where he stands. She needs to calm the mind instead of keeping it in limbo.

I see your point about feeling pressured though. I remember "breaking up" with my Cancer friend because she was extremely pushy and never took my "no's" as a final answer... She insisted her way. I know it sounds extremely childish and I WAS young... But, I literally broke off the friendship due to her pushing.

So... I understand.

Her mind does not need calming. She pushed too far and he has broken up with her as they are on a "break"! All she can now do is concentrate on herself, Controlling her scorp moon and be let nitty picky which we no Virgos are!!

Yes it does. She said so. If he broke up without saying so, he is a jer
click to expand
i think is she is ready, willing and means it, maybe opening the lines of communication may work with the provisio that the aim is seeking to understand rather than seeking to be understood. hopefully he will be receptive to her.
Posted by jeane
i think is she is ready, willing and means it, maybe opening the lines of communication may work with the provisio that the aim is seeking to understand rather than seeking to be understood. hopefully he will be receptive to her.

I'm willing to give him the world as long as it's 50/50
Posted by Nevermore
This gave me flashback of how my Ex sag just manipulate me through desperation contact while in the middle of the exams!

After that heavy argument.. I suddenly went silent mode and told him to better focus on his exams and taking it a break between us until we are finished with exams.
He was panicked and constantly disturbing me mailing of how's going or demanding to answered me.. until finally he went silent that he "understood" me.. (he's to selfish to understand me)

But at the same time while focusing on exams.. I finally began to open my eyes about this relationship (especially his behavioral). No matter if we are stress to each other, I already can see how toxic relationship it was.

Sadly.. I though that it was all the stress from the exams (yet gave him the last warning about this, otherwise it'll end the relationship).. yet even after graduations he doesn't changed that much until at the end he showed me the unexpected that it made me moved out and break up with him.

That sucks "/
Posted by Vixen2
You can go for a hail mary manuever and pour out all your feelings in a textra or email...notice I said *hail mary * if he doesn't respond...just let him go.

Oh he would definitely respond and then after a couple hours go back to giving the silent treatment.
Posted by nerdyvirgp
Posted by TaurusLovesScorpio
Posted by nerdyvirgp
Posted by busyeyes88
Posted by nerdyvirgp
Posted by Infinite8
Posted by busyeyes88
The man is with her physically showing her..... Taurus will show feeling before they open up emotionally. I have never ever forced another human being to open up to me... I have let them be themselves and felt them out "intuitively". If they tell me personal things or secrets etc it's their choice I have not asked this of them!!! But people are different we do all run at the same time.. If a person has no patience and always looking for "validation" or "relationship updates" then walk away.... Taurus is not for you.

This is true! I would be less inclined to ask such questions if I can clearly see it in behavior. To me, actions speak louder than words. The eyes as well... If I see live in the eyes, I am calm and I know what's up.

But, if he is avoiding me and I haven't seen him in weeks because he is upset? I want to know what's up... Because there is nothing else to go by!

Exactly when I look into his eyes I can see his feelings for me and true intentions . But then we have a fight and your just ready to give up. It's just bizarre to me and sounds like he's scared. And when I put "man" in quotes I said man because at this moment he is not acting like my man he is distant from me. I was not challenging his manhood

I have seen scorpio moon in action over a span of 11 years... I'd be running too!!!!

That moon can be very abusive BIG TIME!!

Unintentionally. But the sun of Taurus is emotionally abusive. Not talking to someone periods of time just because your is ego is hurt. Not saying that is done on purpose either just your nature

He is just in retreat mode, healing from what he perceives as your abuse. He won't give you the peace of putting your fears to rest, but you won't give him the peace of having a little space, time to heal and think things over a bit before he makes a drastic decision....

Yeah but on Taurus time we all know that can be a lifetime ...
click to expand

Don't give ultimatums or ask definitive questions about the relationship. Just give him a week or two to think things over, letting him know that you miss him and want to resolve things eventually, when he's r
Posted by nerdyvirgp
Posted by jeane
i think is she is ready, willing and means it, maybe opening the lines of communication may work with the provisio that the aim is seeking to understand rather than seeking to be understood. hopefully he will be receptive to her.

I'm willing to give him the world as long as it's 50/50
click to expand

so not ready then...lol
Posted by Infinite8
Posted by Nevermore
This gave me flashback of how my Ex sag just manipulate me through desperation contact while in the middle of the exams!

After that heavy argument.. I suddenly went silent mode and told him to better focus on his exams and taking it a break between us until we are finished with exams.
He was panicked and constantly disturbing me mailing of how's going or demanding to answered me.. until finally he went silent that he "understood" me.. (he's to selfish to understand me)

But at the same time while focusing on exams.. I finally began to open my eyes about this relationship (especially his behavioral). No matter if we are stress to each other, I already can see how toxic relationship it was.

Sadly.. I though that it was all the stress from the exams (yet gave him the last warning about this, otherwise it'll end the relationship).. yet even after graduations he doesn't changed that much until at the end he showed me the unexpected that it made me moved out and break up with him.

If someone tells me they want a break, I will respect that and even ask "sure, how long do you need?" Because I want to make sure I RESPECT IT.

If the person leaves without no warning and gives me the silent treatment I have two choices:

1. I ask "what's up? What's going on? Where do you stand"

2. I assume he no longer cares and just bail. But that leaves so much unsaid... So many wrongs that could have been corrected an in a way keeps you away from learning.

But, I get you... I don't like being pushed either.
click to expand

And who really wants to deal with the unknown right? Let me ignore you for how long I feel like and forget that you have feelings. I'm giving him his space but he won't give me closure. F'd up Taurus mindsets. If he didn't respond because he wants to leave the door open for is then that is what should've been said. Mind f'ers
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