RP in correct forum. Clingy/Needy/Smothering

Posted by Goldfish
If you don't mind a girls opinion google NiceGuy syndrome or NiceGuy â„¢.

I could be way off the mark, but just trying to help.

Do let us know.

Good luck.

PS - Luck doesn't exist...

Posted by femme
LOL @ re-post in correct forum. The moderators should be along shortly.

*side eyes CP & Sniper*

The first step is definitely awareness, that way you can avoid being/doing those things with the next beau.

Posted by Jkats

Posted by femme
LOL @ re-post in correct forum. The moderators should be along shortly.

*side eyes CP & Sniper*

The first step is definitely awareness, that way you can avoid being/doing those things with the next beau.

Hehe, i'm a Virgo to my core!

Yes, I am now aware, I just hope I didn't blow my chance with the man i'm in love with. I can't believe he's stuck around for so long!!!! I was playing the blame game, but wasn't taking responsibility for my own actions, which in turn has pushed him away little by little.

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Posted by femme

Posted by Jkats

Posted by femme
LOL @ re-post in correct forum. The moderators should be along shortly.

*side eyes CP & Sniper*

The first step is definitely awareness, that way you can avoid being/doing those things with the next beau.

Hehe, i'm a Virgo to my core!

Yes, I am now aware, I just hope I didn't blow my chance with the man i'm in love with. I can't believe he's stuck around for so long!!!! I was playing the blame game, but wasn't taking responsibility for my own actions, which in turn has pushed him away little by little.

For introspection purposes I would ask myself what made me so clingy and needy in the first place. Is it possible that he isn't completely blameless? But as you put it he's 'still around,' there's still time to salvage this.

click to expand

Posted by Jkats

Posted by femme

Posted by Jkats

Posted by femme
LOL @ re-post in correct forum. The moderators should be along shortly.

*side eyes CP & Sniper*

The first step is definitely awareness, that way you can avoid being/doing those things with the next beau.

Hehe, i'm a Virgo to my core!

Yes, I am now aware, I just hope I didn't blow my chance with the man i'm in love with. I can't believe he's stuck around for so long!!!! I was playing the blame game, but wasn't taking responsibility for my own actions, which in turn has pushed him away little by little.

For introspection purposes I would ask myself what made me so clingy and needy in the first place. Is it possible that he isn't completely blameless? But as you put it he's 'still around,' there's still time to salvage this.

Because I need to work on my self esteem, and be OK with being alone. Nobody can define my happiness, except myself.

And yes, he's to blame too, if he wasn't happy with my actions, he could've communicated that with me. He also could've tried harder in our "relationship" with his actions. Well he's in his shell right now, but idk if he'll ever come back out. However, the last Facebook message I sent him, he read within a minute, so idk whether to take that as a good sign or not. BUT, I can't allow myself to obsess over it.

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Posted by Goldfish
Oh ok so you are female?
Forget the NiceGuy advice then.

So another try:

You will receive from a man exactly the same love you give to yourself.

When you love yourself it will be easier to be less clingy, needy and smothering because you won't need validation from a man and you won't be scared of him leaving because you will know that if that mans leaves you it is because he was unable to appreciate the wonderful and special person you are so he better be gone and make space from someone who can treasure and cherish you the way you deserve.

You also will have less tolerance for unacceptable behaviour so if he doesn't try hard enough the way you want him to, you will be the one loosing interest and leaving.

Hopes that makes sense.

and I know: easier said than done.

Posted by femme

Posted by Jkats

Posted by femme

Posted by Jkats

Posted by femme
LOL @ re-post in correct forum. The moderators should be along shortly.

*side eyes CP & Sniper*

The first step is definitely awareness, that way you can avoid being/doing those things with the next beau.

Hehe, i'm a Virgo to my core!

Yes, I am now aware, I just hope I didn't blow my chance with the man i'm in love with. I can't believe he's stuck around for so long!!!! I was playing the blame game, but wasn't taking responsibility for my own actions, which in turn has pushed him away little by little.

For introspection purposes I would ask myself what made me so clingy and needy in the first place. Is it possible that he isn't completely blameless? But as you put it he's 'still around,' there's still time to salvage this.

Because I need to work on my self esteem, and be OK with being alone. Nobody can define my happiness, except myself.

And yes, he's to blame too, if he wasn't happy with my actions, he could've communicated that with me. He also could've tried harder in our "relationship" with his actions. Well he's in his shell right now, but idk if he'll ever come back out. However, the last Facebook message I sent him, he read within a minute, so idk whether to take that as a good sign or not. BUT, I can't allow myself to obsess over it.

A big yes to showing yourself some love!

Hopefully when he cools down you guys will have a chance to talk and lay everything on the table. I like your attitude and feel like you're on the right track for self-growth. All the best :]

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Posted by cowpuncher

Posted by femme
LOL @ re-post in correct forum. The moderators should be along shortly.

*side eyes CP & Sniper*

The first step is definitely awareness, that way you can avoid being/doing those things with the next beau.

Femmeflattale, is that you?


OP - You filed this in the WRONG forum. The Man Cave is supposed to be a refuge from relentless badgering relationship crap. You're looking for the "Relationship" forum, that's where you need to post this kind of thing.

You're a Virgo, and I make it my habit to show Virgo's a lot of favoritism because I've got a soft spot for them somewhere deep down, so just delete this thread, start it again in the Relationship forum, and all will be well.

Otherwise the rule around here is that if you post a "relationship" thread badgering men with your relationship questions, you're supposed to post picks of your cleavage at the very least. Full bikini pics if you're REALLY a pest. That annoys some of the gals around here, but that's on purpose - It's SUPPOSED to be a deterrent.

Since Femmeflattale will no doubt champion your cause now, I'll even show you one last bit of my infamous Virgo-favoritism: If you can get Femmeflattale to post HER cleavage I'll get the guys to take that in payment in lieu of your own.

Short of that though, you gotta post your boobage, or delete the thread and file it CORRECTLY in the Relationships board. Thanks! - CP

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Posted by cowpuncher

Posted by femme

Posted by cowpuncher

Posted by femme
LOL @ re-post in correct forum. The moderators should be along shortly.

*side eyes CP & Sniper*

The first step is definitely awareness, that way you can avoid being/doing those things with the next beau.

Femmeflattale, is that you?


OP - You filed this in the WRONG forum. The Man Cave is supposed to be a refuge from relentless badgering relationship crap. You're looking for the "Relationship" forum, that's where you need to post this kind of thing.

You're a Virgo, and I make it my habit to show Virgo's a lot of favoritism because I've got a soft spot for them somewhere deep down, so just delete this thread, start it again in the Relationship forum, and all will be well.

Otherwise the rule around here is that if you post a "relationship" thread badgering men with your relationship questions, you're supposed to post picks of your cleavage at the very least. Full bikini pics if you're REALLY a pest. That annoys some of the gals around here, but that's on purpose - It's SUPPOSED to be a deterrent.

Since Femmeflattale will no doubt champion your cause now, I'll even show you one last bit of my infamous Virgo-favoritism: If you can get Femmeflattale to post HER cleavage I'll get the guys to take that in payment in lieu of your own.

Short of that though, you gotta post your boobage, or delete the thread and file it CORRECTLY in the Relationships board. Thanks! - CP

CP... hello.

It's been a full 24 hours and some change since this thread has been posted. What took you so long... old age?

I'll cut you some slack though and hold off on my pestering duties since it is your birthday season. Just don't get used to the niceness.

Keeping busy having one of those "real lives" - Spending less time on DXP.

Geez, I was just kidding about the flattale thing, I didn't mean to give you a complex and make you drop half your name!

Scorpio chicks... they always overreact. -_- *shaking my head*

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Posted by RumiLove
I'm all of that, in friendships/other normal relations too...its horrible!
But I know how to be in silence and patience, just doing my work(on the outside) or getting on with life. These traits are my saving grace, really.

What's your moon, mercury and mars OP?

Posted by ramengirl
The decision to change is made with action and not with words. Being confident and content with who you truly are (not what you pretend you are) can help too. 😊 And don't forget to take it one step at a time.