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May 03, 2013Comments: 0 · Posts: 552 · Topics: 43
So, we have been together for 4 months now and were best friends for 6 months prior to getting in a relationship.
Hes a virgo sun with scorpio mars and venus. We have our college vacation now and we whatsapp every single day for hours and went on a date twice in these 2 months vacation.
Now, he went to his cousin's place last week. We were chatting the entire time before he had to board the flight. He reached and texted me and I casually asked him the name of the place since my hometown is right there so I was excited and curious. He got mad about it! He said i am being nosy. Like WTF!!! I was extremely hurt but I still chose to keep it aside and not bring up a fight as I wanted him to enjoy. He was learning the native language of that town since that's where I originally belong to. It made me happy and I asked him to tell me few words. He was having fun learning all the abusive slangs.It was going fun until he said something which in English means "I'll fuck you and make you bleed". I found it extremely disrespectful. I am a virgin(he's not) and after lots of fights and frustrating depressing moments weeks ago I decided to let us make love this October after our semester midterm but incidents like these make me doubt my decision. I expressed that I found that statement to be highly degrading and he got mad that I am mad at him(like,WOW). He said things like "thanks for ruining my mood.I hate your language now,thanks to you". I thought he'd sober up next day and realize what he said wasn't good but nope. He started acting cold. He didnt text at all.
I texted today after a day and a half saying "hi,love you miss you,take care". He replied "okay.Take care".
I am the one who's mad yet I am the one initiating and he's the one acting all pricey. I behaved normal and said "your cousins love you but so do I. Dont you miss me at all? I am not saying talk to me all day.Rather I tell you to focus there and enjoy there but atleast one text in an entire day would be nice". I said it very casually. He said " I'd be returning back in couple of days and then I'd be free to talk. For now atleast let me enjoy with my people here. I am busy. What is this love me,miss me thingy". Never ever have i been misunderstood so bad. I just expected one text(which takes like 1-5 seconds) in an entire day.I thought my "love you miss you" text would make him happy like it did to my Cancerian ex who got out from his office to call me and say how adorable he thought it was and how much he loves me but with my current virgo guy it was ouch. What hurt me even more was that he texted my female bestie yesterday and today commenting on her profile pic on Whatsapp but he's "busy" when it comes to texting me now all of a sudden.
Am I over-reacting or he's being mean and weird? Would love if someone shed some virgo male light upon me.
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Jan 05, 2018Comments: 21 · Posts: 630 · Topics: 0
Aside from him being a dick.. He has time to comment on your female friends picture but doesn’t have time to talk to you?
That’s some next level disrespect. Don’t stand for it sis🙅♀️ Pull back, he’ll act right if he cares.
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Aug 04, 2015Comments: 2057 · Posts: 38091 · Topics: 1026
No! Honey, baby, love...NO!!!
Be strong. Make him fall to your feet and apologize or done!
Please. Don’t ruin yourself by this asshole! He is an asshole!!! And after he contacted your ‘bestie’...he is even bigger asshole!!!
Learn to deal with it and get strong and kick his arrogant butt!!! ❤️
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May 03, 2013Comments: 0 · Posts: 552 · Topics: 43
Thank you so much for your replies,everyone. Means a lot to me xD.
I didn't tell him that I know he texted my bestie regarding her profile pic on whatsapp. I'm reserving that talk for when we meet in person next when college starts in 10 days. He texted me a funny joke last night on his own. Then he texted me today morning asking me what am I upto. I was out shopping clothes for myself with my mom so he asked me to send him pictures so he can help me decide(he hates my sense of fashion so he always helps me choose). Now he texted me again asking what am I upto (just as I type this here lol).
Then he posted a photo of us on Instagram and wrote - She is not what I WANT,she is what I NEED.
We both are polar opposites - he drinks a lot and the farthest I have been is smell beer and declare that I hate it. He even smoked weed and cigar(he has quit now as I told him I hate to see him do that) and I consider these distasteful. He is not a virgin and is toooo sexually kinky and has an extremely high libido whereas I am a virgin and prefer being sophisticated. I am a nerd and he's a hottie. He is tooo much into looks and clothes whereas I only focus on studies and soccer/football. He is a lot into PDA whereas I hate PDA.
When we officially got in a relationship, everyone in college was shocked as to how because we are so opposite. We fight a lot too due to our difference of opinions. Also, being a Piscean I am extremely sensitive,sentimental and emotional whereas he being a Virgo is extremely extremely extremely critical and super demanding and dogmatic.He is super sensitive and sentimental too which is why we argue a lot. It's a magic how we still love each other's company--online and offline. It gets difficult when talking online when we are long distant because we tend to misunderstand and over-react and argue more but we never really stop talking and it's amazing when we are together in person. He pursuades me a lot for sex and alcohol(he just wants to get high with me) and I keep saying a straight no and that makes him super mad. The few things we have in common are - 100% honesty, loyalty,chicken lovers, soccer/football lovers,love for travelling,both want a stable partner and a serious relationship. We both know we are not each others type yet we want to be together. Is it very strange or stupid?
I asked him what kind of a girl does he want as a wife for him and his family. He said a girl like me is what he wants.He said I am not his type but still loves me because of my nature as I am extremely loyal and he knows I genuinely love him.He said I am too different than his exes and that it's a good thing.
He's both defensive and manipulative, get out
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May 03, 2013Comments: 0 · Posts: 552 · Topics: 43
*Update(because i dont want to start a new thread)*
The last talk we had was 3 days ago.
4 days ago we were talking about campus placement and he said he wants to work in the public sector in our country.He wants to pursue MBA in our country whereas,I want to go abroad to pursue my Masters degree and PhD. This is something he knew ever since we were best friends. When he confessed he loves me,he was aware we'd have to be in a LDR after we graduate next year. We made plans on how to make this work after college. He said he sucks at it but will try his best. Anyway,so after he said that,I reminded him that if he wants to stay in our country and has no plans going abroad then what is the future of our relationship.He said he hasn't given a serious thought about his career after MBA and said he's only focussed about MBA exam now. He said he wants to 'live in the present'. I told him that few serious things like a relationship need to considered only after thinking about the future else there's no point getting so close to each other only to breakup due to an inevitable reason. He said there's nothing to do with a breakup(he gets mad when i talk about breakups) and said we'll marry once I am done studying.Said he's willing to wait. I asked him what if i get a great job with a great salary abroad? He said in that case he doesnt mind leaving his job and move abroad with me and look for a new job there because money is important. So we had that talk and few minutes later he said he's sleepy and said goodnight. I knew something was wrong because it was too early for him to sleep. I saw him active on facebook for 1.5 hours after that. I even funnily texted him that I know he's not asleep but he didnt read it until the next day morning and didnt reply to that.
The next day he texted me about our mutual friend and said few casual things and I replied and sent him a video of my pet.He didnt read my text at all. This was 3 days ago. Then day before yesterday I went for an overnight camping and I posted photos.He saw them but again,didnt text me at all. He read my text from 3 days ago yesterday but didnt reply or text anything at all. I texted him last night but he was asleep so he didnt read it. I had texted "what's our relationship status?". I thought its probably a bad idea as i looked very insecure so i deleted it so he cant read the message but he can see that I texted him something last night which I deleted.Again,he didnt even bother to know what was it that I texted.
This is a very very unusual behaviour from him. Our college reopens next week on monday and I know he'll come hug me and try to kiss me like nothing ever happened but this behavior is very disturbing. On one hand I am told that I must not tolerate this and I must confront him and go missing on him too. On the other hand I am told to accept his 'need for space' and behave all normal and good when he returns. What am I supposed to do really? Does anyone have any idea what's cooking here?