can I make him open up to me?

Hi, I'm new here. I would like to get some insights from the virgo guys here please. A little background here........
I initially dated my present virgo BF a little more than 6 years ago for a little over a year then he broke up with me b/c he said we don't do anything together (he likes to drink in the bar but i don't like nite life) and I pressured him to tell me he loves me. It took him 7 months to admit that he is my boyfriend b/c he said he doesn't like to be too close with anybody! During the time we were dating, he rarely rarely say he misses me, he would never hold my hand and when I ask him if he loves me he would say he doesn't like to talk about that. He said it took him 2 years before he felt comfortable telling his ex that he loves her!!! I never found out if he just didn't like to express his feelings or he just didn't have strong feelings for me.
On Dec. 2009, we got back together......
He started by calling me once a week only to "hang out" during the first month. During the 2nd and 3rd month, we hung out and visit his mom and daughter a few time a week. It took him 4 months before he introduced me to his friends as "girlfriend". In May, he asked me to go away for a few days to visit his dad. We got a little closer after that trip and he would call me a few times everyday telling me things and wanted to spend more time with me. 3 weeks ago, I told him I love him while we were having sex. He didn't say anything; he just held me real tight and kissed me....ok, so he doesn't love me then... I didn't say the "love" word again b/c I didn't want him to feel uncomfortable. Last week, I told him I love him again and he said "do you". I said yes and asked him if he wants me to love him and he said yes and told me he cares about me.
We went to a party yesterday; he held my hand where ever he goes, introduced me to all his friends, give me kisses and hugs all the time. Even after he was drunk, he would still hug me and kiss me. I told him I love him before I left and he asked again "do you"? How much? I said a lot, then he asked, 100 times or 1 million times?
Today, I told him I love him and as usual, he asked "do you"? I told him not to ask "do you" anymore. I said it's o.k that you don't love me but do not question about how I feel about you. He then explained that he likes that way we are right now and he doesn't want to change that. He said "by putting a label on it might change things" I told him I need time to

think about what he just told me then he said so you just gonna stop talking to me? I said no then he said "I care about you and want to be with you and that's not enough? I maybe do or maybe don't feel it". He said he is talking to me more now and I agreed. He got mad by explaining (he gets angry easily) but he continued saying that by telling me he loves me might change things....I might break up with him after he tells me the "love" word. I told him i'm not pressuring him, I just want to let him know that I love him b/c he's made happy and I need him to be in my life. He then tells me he knows i'm not pressuring him and he's happy to be with me and he needs me too. He said he wants me to love him and I can tell him I love him everyday.
Please help analyze this for me..... what can I do to help him open up to me. I have done everything and anything i can to make him happy. Maybe I just have to be more patient? Thank you for reading this long post.

So are you guys exclusive?

Maybe the "L Word" makes him break out in a rash below deck. He's there, you're there. If your emotional needs aren't being met, then bounce. If they are, then take all that mental 'what if' crap and bin it.

And after waiting and waiting to hear the words, why would you break up with him if he says them? That's a puzzlement to me.

If you are giving and giving with little to no return, that's not a relationship, that's a black hole. I don't care what the sign is.

Ahhhhso. 🙂

Posted by Let*It*Be
"I might break up with him after he tells me the "love" word. I told him i'm not pressuring him, Please help analyze this for me"



GROW UP!

lol exactly. no matter how let*it*be interpreted this post, the post was a headache and was hard to follow!

Posted by silvycrystal
3 weeks ago, I told him I love him while we were having sex. He didn't say anything; he just held me real tight and kissed me....ok, so he doesn't love me then...

Wrong.
Virgos show their feelings through ACTION.

He does love you, but his constant questioning seems to stem from something he is unsure of in you.
Are you a Gemini or Sag?

Posted by venusianbull
Ahhhhso. 🙂

click to expand

Sprechen sie Deutsch?

Ja Cajun, aber mein Deutsch ist nicht schrecklich gut. Aus der Praxis. 🙂

Posted by venusianbull
Ja Cajun, aber mein Deutsch ist nicht schrecklich gut. Aus der Praxis. 🙂

Wunder schone. Eine nette ??berraschung 🙂

🙂 Meine Urgro??mutter war volles Vollblutdeutsch, kam zu den Staaten als ein junges M?_dchen mit ihrer Tante. Ich nahm es in der Schule, und mein ist es rostig. K?nnte einen Nutzen tun, um daran wieder zu kommen. Also, ich kann sagen, dass mein Deutsch stinkt, oder 'einen netten Tag haben' und schw?rt sogar einige Wahl W?rter. 😄

And, amazingly enough, I can still count to ten. Whoohooo! 😉

Posted by Cajunspirit


He does love you ....

You don't know that. You cannot counsel a confused girl who apparantly has no clue how desperate she is presenting herself to a guy who is obviously taking advantage of this situation ..... that he loves her.

This will cause her to sink lower to the floor in hopes of him one day considering her as worth something other than an ego boost.

Silvy ... this man is taking advantage of your heart .. the writing is clearly on the wall.


I know for a fact that Virgo's DO TELL the one they love .. that they love.

If this man is NOT telling you he loves .. then he does not.


Virgos say what they mean and they mean what they say ... and he means it when he tells you that he's not going to tell you he loves you, that he will only tell you that he cares.


Take that ^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^ to the bank.


Cajun has no clue what he says .... for god sake, don't believe this man is showing you through actions that he loves you because he's not showing you he loves you .. he's showing you that he is enjoying how much you give, while not having to reciprocate.

At least we get to see what kind a man Cajun is.

Posted by venusianbull
🙂 Meine Urgro??mutter war volles Vollblutdeutsch, kam zu den Staaten als ein junges M?_dchen mit ihrer Tante. Ich nahm es in der Schule, und mein ist es rostig. K?nnte einen Nutzen tun, um daran wieder zu kommen. Also, ich kann sagen, dass mein Deutsch stinkt, oder 'einen netten Tag haben' und schw?rt sogar einige Wahl W?rter. 😄

Ich verstehe. Meine Vater is Deutsch, er lebt ins Berlin.
Ich hatte ein jahre auf Deustchsprachlehren und Ich bin rostig.

ut gut. Wir k?nnen schlechtes Deutsch an einander tippen und in ein viel erforderliche Praxis kommen. Ihr Vater ist in Berlin? Sie m?_ssen ihn vermissen, bis jetzt weg seiend.

"G", just tossing that out there, blasted typos.

Ich liebe Kuchen und T?lpel in Deutsch.

BTW, ist ein Cajun Deutsch Hure. 😄

Posted by Beergo85
Ich liebe Kuchen und T?lpel in Deutsch.

BTW, ist ein Cajun Deutsch Hure. 😄

LOL I love cake...it would simply be un-American if you didn't enjoy it.

Posted by venusianbull

Posted by Beergo85
Ich liebe Kuchen und T?lpel in Deutsch.

BTW, ist ein Cajun Deutsch Hure. 😄

LOL I love cake...it would simply be un-American if you didn't enjoy it.

click to expand

I must be a communist 😢.

I'm not much into cake. Though I'll gladly sell my soul for a good Strawberry Pie or the like.

thanks everyone for replying! I've learned from the first time that I shouldn't pressure him to say (or feel) what I want him to say/feel. I didn't pressure him and he told me he knows that. I told him I love him b/c he's made me very happy! It's o.k that he doesn't feel the same way yet and I didn't expect him to tell me he loves me. But why he kept questioning on how i really feel? it makes me feel like he doesn't believe me or trust me. I have never lied to him and I always keep my words. When I say I will do something for him, I always do. I have never let him down.
—

Posted by VirgoHero

Posted by venusianbull

Posted by Beergo85
Ich liebe Kuchen und T?lpel in Deutsch.

BTW, ist ein Cajun Deutsch Hure. 😄

LOL I love cake...it would simply be un-American if you didn't enjoy it.

I must be a communist 😢.

I'm not much into cake. Though I'll gladly sell my soul for a good Strawberry Pie or the like.

click to expand

*smh* You're not a communist VH, and no need for soul selling, just come on up to the table and have a seat. This Bull knows how to make some stellar pie.

Silvy, RELAX woman. You're going to give yourself a stroke. Slow it down some and breathe for heavens sake. I cannot answer for the man, I'll leave that up to the gents to try and answer your questions. For your sake though quit allowing the situation to make you so frantic. I understand it's frustrating but all this 'ARRRRRRGH' is going to transmit and he'll be picking up on it making him tense. Tense dude is no picnic.

thanks everyone for replying! I've learned from the first time that I shouldn't pressure him to say (or feel) what I want him to say/feel. I didn't pressure him and he told me he knows that. I told him I love him b/c he's made me very happy! It's o.k that he doesn't feel the same way yet and I didn't expect him to tell me he loves me. But why he kept questioning on how i really feel? it makes me feel like he doesn't believe me or trust me. I have never lied to him and I always keep my words. When I say I will do something for him, I always do. I have never let him down.
—

thanks everyone for replying! I've learned from the first time that I shouldn't pressure him to say (or feel) what I want him to say/feel. I didn't pressure him and he told me he knows that. I told him I love him b/c he's made me very happy! It's o.k that he doesn't feel the same way yet and I didn't expect him to tell me he loves me. But why he kept questioning on how i really feel? it makes me feel like he doesn't believe me or trust me. I have never lied to him and I always keep my words. When I say I will do something for him, I always do. I have never let him down.
—

Thank you Venus, I will learn to relax. Right now, we are both happy to be together....and I will go with the flow..

Posted by silvycrystal

I am a scorpio

Hahaha, I should have known. You write more like a Sag though.

The Virgo Scorpio chemistry is strong. Often time the Virgo is put off by the Scorpio insecurities and lack of trust.
Your lack of trust in him, will be reflected on you. So you are most likely in a deadlock with him.

If you don't discuss and express your emotions and trust to him, he will not do it with you. You need to be the one to initiate.

Posted by Beergo85
Ich liebe Kuchen und T?lpel in Deutsch.

BTW, ist ein Cajun Deutsch Hure. 😄

click to expand

Ja wohl 😛