Explain the difference between

This topic was created in the Virgo forum by gemini64 on Wednesday, December 16, 2015 and has 20 replies.
Is there actually a distinction? One you can decipher in the moment.

I'm asking only because I can't get out of my head the look on the face friend of mine who is a male Virgo. It was a look I've never seen prior, so I am conflicted as to what his eyes were actually saying.

The only way I can describe it is that when I walked up to him, he gave me this look that was intense, but at the same time, it made me feel very uncomfortable. It certainly wasn't something I expected from him.

His brown eyes nearly turned black and he came across stern but to me, it felt somewhat cold. Whatever it was, I could definitely sense his underlying emotion. He was very concise in his comments; his behavior and eyes didn't change for one second. Then he quickly turned away and never spoke again.

For those who are more experienced with Male Virgo's, whether as a close friend or in a relationship, would you be likely to believe my friend was in some type of emotional pain, angry or perhaps feeling intense emotions that were conflicting to him?

Remember, he is a dear friend only. I wish I could have done something to help him, but as you all know, Virgo men are the last people on the planet who seek help, especially from a woman. He isn't the type of man to disclose anything that would make him appear weak.
He did that to feck with you. I make you feel exactly how you are feeling now.
Posted by Greentea
He did that to feck with you. I make you feel exactly how you are feeling now.

OK if what you say is accurate, what would be his motive? Is it simply an ego thing or more of a control thing? or both?
Posted by Greentea
He did that to feck with you. I make you feel exactly how you are feeling now.

*to make you feel like you are now and think of him...like you are now. Virgos are mental creatures, I think they know how to give aND leave a mental impression to someone.
Posted by gemini64
Posted by Greentea
He did that to feck with you. I make you feel exactly how you are feeling now.

OK if what you say is accurate, what would be his motive? Is it simply an ego thing or more of a control thing? or both?
click to expand


To leave a lasting impression, to make you think of him. They're not fools, they know what they are doing.
so you're saying he wants me to think of him and be conflicted, correct?

I get the mental thing, being a Gem, we are too. but I'm not one to act cold and intense for a minute coming across completely opposite of what you normally are simply to make a long lasting impression.

so he got me thinking of him, i know he thinks of me too. big deal. what's the overall gain in this?
Posted by Greentea
Posted by gemini64
Posted by Greentea
He did that to feck with you. I make you feel exactly how you are feeling now.

OK if what you say is accurate, what would be his motive? Is it simply an ego thing or more of a control thing? or both?


To leave a lasting impression, to make you think of him. They're not fools, they know what they are doing.
click to expand

so you're saying they are manipulators.

ok, i'll accept that. so why would he, a close friend for years try to manipulate me and my feelings/impression of him?
Posted by gemini64
so you're saying he wants me to think of him and be conflicted, correct?

I get the mental thing, being a Gem, we are too. but I'm not one to act cold and intense for a minute coming across completely opposite of what you normally are simply to make a long lasting impression.

so he got me thinking of him, i know he thinks of me too. big deal. what's the overall gain in this?


Maybe nothing for him. But like I said, they are mental creatures (different in the way of a Gem) in my experience. A gemini doesn't leave you guessing like a virgo does. I think they get a kick out of it, leaving certain impressions to male you guess if they have a liking for you or not...can never really tell, which what makes you keep guessing.
Posted by gemini64
Posted by Greentea
Posted by gemini64
Posted by Greentea
He did that to feck with you. I make you feel exactly how you are feeling now.

OK if what you say is accurate, what would be his motive? Is it simply an ego thing or more of a control thing? or both?


To leave a lasting impression, to make you think of him. They're not fools, they know what they are doing.

so you're saying they are manipulators.

ok, i'll accept that. so why would he, a close friend for years try to manipulate me and my feelings/impression of him?
click to expand


Because it makes life sweeter...not so boring. They like to leave impressions.
Posted by Greentea
Posted by gemini64
so you're saying he wants me to think of him and be conflicted, correct?

I get the mental thing, being a Gem, we are too. but I'm not one to act cold and intense for a minute coming across completely opposite of what you normally are simply to make a long lasting impression.

so he got me thinking of him, i know he thinks of me too. big deal. what's the overall gain in this?


Maybe nothing for him. But like I said, they are mental creatures (different in the way of a Gem) in my experience. A gemini doesn't leave you guessing like a virgo does. I think they get a kick out of it, leaving certain impressions to male you guess if they have a liking for you or not...can never really tell, which what makes you keep guessing.
click to expand

Hmm, interesting. he may or may not have a liking for me more than a friend. i have no clue. Looking at me with angry eyes or whatever they were certainly doesn't give me the impression of anyone liking me, that's for sure. we've been friends for years, so he's a little late to the party.

oh well, hope he had fun while it lasted. it certainly didn't leave me with a very positive impression of him. I hate mind games. i'd rather have had him tell me he was pissed at me for some reason. at least that is something i can understand.

thanks Greentea for your insightful comments. very helpful indeed.
Posted by Greentea
Posted by gemini64
Posted by Greentea
Posted by gemini64
Posted by Greentea
He did that to feck with you. I make you feel exactly how you are feeling now.

OK if what you say is accurate, what would be his motive? Is it simply an ego thing or more of a control thing? or both?


To leave a lasting impression, to make you think of him. They're not fools, they know what they are doing.

so you're saying they are manipulators.

ok, i'll accept that. so why would he, a close friend for years try to manipulate me and my feelings/impression of him?


Because it makes life sweeter...not so boring. They like to leave impressions.
click to expand

we've been good friends for years. he already had left a wonderful impression on me. the last thing he needed to do was screw that up with some act.
Posted by gemini64
Posted by Greentea
Posted by gemini64
Posted by Greentea
Posted by gemini64
Posted by Greentea
He did that to feck with you. I make you feel exactly how you are feeling now.

OK if what you say is accurate, what would be his motive? Is it simply an ego thing or more of a control thing? or both?


To leave a lasting impression, to make you think of him. They're not fools, they know what they are doing.

so you're saying they are manipulators.

ok, i'll accept that. so why would he, a close friend for years try to manipulate me and my feelings/impression of him?


Because it makes life sweeter...not so boring. They like to leave impressions.

we've been good friends for years. he already had left a wonderful impression on me. the last thing he needed to do was screw that up with some act.
click to expand


You're welcome.

Good/bad...you're thinking of him right. I dont know the story, but.maybe he does have a liking to react that way. Who knows? ... most don't with a virgo. Mindful creatures!!
Reminds me how my Gemini ex often became shy/uncomfortable with the way I looked at her at certain moments, she said it was "too emotional" for her and would try to look away. Virgos express a lot of emotion through their eyes
Im so sick of this game. He wants you to sod him, obsess, they want you to think he is in love with you (but for some reason the universe is holding you back).... No. He wants sex. Attention. Gemini do not fall for it. use yur wit and insult him.


Posted by BoomShakalakaBoom
Reminds me how my Gemini ex often became shy/uncomfortable with the way I looked at her at certain moments, she said it was "too emotional" for her and would try to look away. Virgos express a lot of emotion through their eyes

You are SO correct BoomSLB (nice Sly & the family Stone reference btw) about Virgo's expressing tons of emotion through their eyes.

You know the saying, "If looks could kill...."

I've had friends, relatives and of course my husband angry or emotional and none of their "looks" were even close to my virgo friend's look. First time I've ever seen brown eyes turn black.
I recall thinking, "damn, WTH".

I still am not sure if it was his look of emotional pain, anger or both, but it was down right scary. It may or may not have been directed at me. Thats what's so conflicting. I don't know and he hasn't said a word since. When you've known someone for years and have been through many defining experiences with them but never seen this look before, it's one of those things that really stops you in your tracks.
Posted by BlackMamba
is this the same friend who cut you off for years without you knowing why?

Yup. kind of put it back in my mind until yesterday when one of my boys had a basketball game against my former HS. Met some people there who were good friends with my friend years ago. It's like the never ending circle. got me thinking about his look that last day. never had seen that prior.

It's hard to let go of someone you care about and have known for years and then one day, they act strange and everything is gone. It's so damn frustrating to be a gemini because we want answers and without them, we keep replaying things over and over until they make sense. This one clearly does not.
I know CC, I know. trust me. I've tried. I've emailed him asking him to meet up for coffee and let's chat. he hasn't accepted nor responded to that offer. being that we're both married, it's hard to do anything more. I've never really gotten to know his wife. I honestly don't know the entire dynamic there, but don't think interjecting my concerns into their life would be appropriate.

you better than most understand that when a virgo makes up their mind, it's pretty much done. he's like an immovable object.

i don't expect him to make some emotional type of confession. i'm not that type of person. a life time of a mutual friendship is a hard thing
to let go when you had no say in the matter.
Posted by BlackMamba
Posted by gemini64
Posted by BlackMamba
is this the same friend who cut you off for years without you knowing why?

Yup. kind of put it back in my mind until yesterday when one of my boys had a basketball game against my former HS. Met some people there who were good friends with my friend years ago. It's like the never ending circle. got me thinking about his look that last day. never had seen that prior.

It's hard to let go of someone you care about and have known for years and then one day, they act strange and everything is gone. It's so damn frustrating to be a gemini because we want answers and without them, we keep replaying things over and over until they make sense. This one clearly does not.

this has been on your mind for a long time, don't you think it's time to sit down and have that conversation.

force the issue
click to expand


Lol
Posted by BlackMamba
Posted by gemini64
I know CC, I know. trust me. I've tried. I've emailed him asking him to meet up for coffee and let's chat. he hasn't accepted nor responded to that offer. being that we're both married, it's hard to do anything more. I've never really gotten to know his wife. I honestly don't know the entire dynamic there, but don't think interjecting my concerns into their life would be appropriate.

you better than most understand that when a virgo makes up their mind, it's pretty much done. he's like an immovable object.

i don't expect him to make some emotional type of confession. i'm not that type of person. a life time of a mutual friendship is a hard thing
to let go when you had no say in the matter.

you have to be a bit more creative. find out what party he'll be at and just pounce on his azz, get him drunk first, and then ask away....
click to expand

Oh yea, that would look real good in front of his wife. She's another Gemini. She might go for my jugular!

Back in the day when we would hang out with mutual friends, he got drunk once in a while. funny thing, i didn't really notice any change in his personality, maybe a tad more at ease but nothing like opening up and revealing all his secrets. he was never a big party guy. Maybe I should send him some rum balls for Christmas? LOL
that's ironic you said, "find him where his wife won't be" because that's exactly what the scenario was when i approached him and got the cold look and silent treatment.

I know the mystery needs to be solved because you just don't pull this to someone who has been a close life long friend. at least not in my book. i wouldn't have done this to him even on my best day, but then again, i'm not a secretive virgo.

If there's an opportunity in the future where I run into him, i will definitely approach him, even if he's with his wife. I will do it tactfully, however.

I do appreciate your insight and advice CC. I think the big difference in this equation is that your connection with your virgo guy is in a relationship. Mine is a connection via friendship, so there are different dynamics at play.

I have even considered that maybe he was going through a divorce, but I'm pretty certain that is not the case. Time has a way of healing things. It's just that I'm not good at being patient.